I hate crying, but here I am, crying.
Hot. salty, streams roll down my cheeks as I take a deep breath to calm myself. After telling Lars everything, the initial shock of John busting through the office door has worn off. I'm so disappointed that he would think so little of me.
"Of course all this has to happen when we have lost a friend, more territory, refugee camps are getting packed, and we may have a possible mole with the power to kill either one of us. Let's add relationship issues on top of all that." I lean back in the chair and cover my eyes, sighing a breath of relief to have gotten it all off my shoulders.
Lars drums his fingers on the table in thought, his fine, rounded-off, pointed nails going,"tick-tick-tick."
I wipe my eyes and drop my hands to my side seeing Lars gazing at nothing lost in his thoughts. His nail tapping slows down, inhaling deeply, he turns his attention back to me.
"Mija, you and John will be alright. You need to talk and be honest about your feelings. You already know this. Just keep your emotions under control when you're talking to him. Now, about the bullet..." He motions for me to lean forward closer to him.
Not knowing what he's wanting to tell me, I lean forward eagerly hoping for some useful information.
*Whack*
I'm stunned as Lars gives me a sharp smack on the head.
"You almost get killed and you're just now telling me?! ¡Esta estúpida chica! Haces que este anciano se sienta inútil. (This stupid girl! You make this old man feel useless.) Do you know what would happen to all of us who care about you if something was to happen to you? You really think that just because other humans can not kill you, that the Erlking would not?" He takes my frozen face cupped in his hands. "Me importas. (I care about you/You're important to me.) Let me help you."
"As long as you don't smack me again." I request with him still holding my cheeks. "And you can't tell anyone else about it, or who you'll be meeting to help work on it with." I add as he releases my cheeks.
"Mija, have I ever given you reason to doubt me?" Lars questions me.
"It's not me you have to convince."
"I understand. Let's go meet him. First, I have to let Belle and Luna know I will be gone. You should maybe do the same for John?" Hesitantly he nods encouragement at me.
"I'm not ready to see and talk to him yet." I groan.
"All the more reason to let him know."
"I'll write a note." Grumbling I pull a few things out of my pockets, finding one of the notes from my desk earlier. Turning it over, I jot down a few words.
-I'll be busy with Lars for a little while. Not ready to talk yet.-
"Auntie Sin!" I'm bum rushed by little Luna as I snap the note to our place for John.
"Luna! Oh my goodness! You're getting so big!" I hug her tightly, not realizing how much she's grown up in the past few months.
She's sprouted up, her little head now coming up to my hips, that beams up at me showing off her fang-filled smile. Others would have been terrified of that smile, I looked at one of the sweetest little girls who radiated joy and love with that smile.
"You're getting prettier every time I see you too." I run my hands through her curly locks that fall in ringlets around her head.
"Guess what else, Auntie?! I'm going to be five next month! That's this much!" She raises a hand showing her five little fingers up and wiggling them at me.
"Wow. Already you're going to be five already?!" I animate my enthusiasm, making her giggle.
"Luna, Daddy and Auntie have to go do some important work now. We should let them go, that way daddy can come back sooner." Belle instructs Luna gently.
Luna nods, "Alright, Mommy. Love you Auntie." She hugs me tightly and give Lars a hug and kiss before going to her mother.
I nod to Belle as we are about to leave, when Luna shouts out, "You're forgetting the note! He'll be angry if you don't send a note!"
I smack my forehead, realizing she's right. I glance around, see the napkin and pull out the special pen B had gifted me.
-Coming to you with trusted help, Sin-
I wait a minute before snapping us to B's place.
Looking around his work room, there's no one there.
"B?" I call out looking for him. The only response I get is silence. Walking around to the tables, I check for a note from him possibly. I know better than to walk the halls and get lost.
"Lady Lacroix, You have brought us a visitor?" Viekar announces his presence in the room, assessing Lars person.
"Yes, to help out with the research. He can be trusted, I promise." I assure Viekar who merely nods to my words.
"He will still have to sign, I have an oath for him already. It's just one that he will not discuss anything or one that concerns this place or the people and things that go on here. Nothing more."
He hands over the paper and I give it to Lars. He signs it without batting an eyelash, giving it to Viekar.
"Viekar, this is Lars. He's part of my family." I use the introduction to add a spot of pride to my stature and Lars.
"Hello Lars. I am Viekar, heritage steward to my master. Since we have your signature, I shall go inform him that you are here." With that Viekar left the room, his hoofs making a scuff noise on the dirt floor as he walked.
"So who is this guy?" Lars asked looking around curiously at the items he sees on display.
"An ally of ours, he's a little crass, but he's starting to grow on me." I tell him to hear a familiar voice behind me.
"I hope I'm growing like a vine, since you seem to enjoy me hanging around you."
I turn and give B a sly smile, "It's more like a tumor."
We both let out a laugh, amusement twinkling in our eyes. Turning to face Lars, his face has me pausing.
Lars squints at Bavarthos, scratching his head, "You're were there in Peru...." He huffs and crosses his long arms across his chest. "What are you hiding? Something is off about you." Lars moves closer to me, protectively wedging himself between me and Bavarthos.
Chuckling, Bavarthos gestures at himself, "Why would you think that?"
Lars visibly voices his agitation, "Don't try to fool me. I'm a Redcap, not a freshly birthed babe." Indignantly, he puts his hands on his hips, waiting for Bavarthos to respond.
Bavarthos looks at me, the smile never falling from his face and his eyes twinkle with mischief.
"Redcaps! You have to admire that they will never fail in calling anyone out on their bullshit."
Bavarthos lets his glamour slowly fade, revealing his true self that makes Lars face morph.
From irritated, thin lips and squinted eyes that steadily open up into shock as his mouth drops open. He stands silent for a moment, then he shakes his head as everything registers and drops to his knees.
"Forgive me, Prince Bavarthos! This foolish subject did not know it was you!" He throws his hands and head low to the floor, kowtowing. "Forgive me, my lord!"
Lars is visibly shaking as he bows to Bavarthos. Since our initial meeting and alliance agreement, I had forgotten that most of the Fae were terrified of offending the royals.
I look to Bavarthos who just shrugs at me, still smiling.
¯\_( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)_/¯
I shrug right back, knowing he understood my look.
¯\_ಠ_ಠ_/¯
B rolls his eyes at me and sighs. "You are forgiven, Lars. You may rise and be at ease. You did not know and I will not punish you for you doing what is in your nature."
Lars looks up, shocked, and slowly rises. "Thank you, Prince Bavarthos. Thank you. You are merciful my Prince."
Bavarthos just shrugs it off, "You can drop the honorifics, Lars. From here on, I'll just be referred to as 'B'. I'm to be treated as a normal Fae according to my military rank under Sin. It's for my own and everyone else's protection. Not that'll you'll be able to tell anyone, but no bowing or things that would inform anyone that I'm disguised."
Giving me a timid glance and reading my expression, Lars nods. "I understand, B, I will keep your secret."
Bavarthos nods, before rolling his shoulders and motioning us to follow him as he heads to his work tables. He pulls over a small box and pulls the red glowing object out for Lars to see.
"A bullet?" Lars face pinches in confusion and looks back and forth between us.
"Yes, this is the bullet I was hit with in Peru. This is what I was referring to earlier when we talked." I let Bavarthos go forward from here.
"Sin believes you could help me in my research. What do you know about magical weapons that can kill an immortal?" He places the bullet back in the box and pushes it towards Lars.
Lars looks at the bullet, a calculating, appraising the source of our conundrum.
"Do you have the Compendium of Tharsigh, or any of his works?" Lars request gets a nod and B snaps his fingers. Several antiquated, leather and wood bound books the size of an end table and at least half a foot thick appear with a heavy, 'thump'.
Lars counts the books and starts breathing heavy with excitement. "You have all of his works?!"
"Yes. Where should we begin looking in these?" Bavarthos pulls one towards him, untying the leather strips that hold it closed and opening it up.
We end up staying there for several hours, working with renewed vigor from Lars enthusiasm and different perspective. By the time Bavarthos ordered us to go home, it was late in the evening.
"I can't believe you have so much to learn from! That was truly amazing to read those! Thank you, my prince for the honor of working beside you today!" Lars gratitude overflows towards Bavarthos before we take off.
Bavarthos shuffles from foot to foot before catching himself to stand still. "It was nothing, Lars. This is not necessary to thank me. Please, just call me B, I'm starting to prefer the lack of honorifics. Anyways, I expect you back here tomorrow afternoon to continue our work. We need to test these ideas you have."
Lars bows, "I'll be here, B."
I give B a warm smile, "Thanks B, we'll see you tomorrow." I wave and snap Lars and I back to his house.
We're greeted by Belle sitting at the table drinking a glass of tea. "Oh good, you're back. Sin, John came by looking for you. He's at your place whenever you're ready to talk. He was looking rather haggard but he said that the situation at HQ has been handled and the rumors are handled. You may stay here of course if you're not ready to talk to him."
I give her tight smile, "Thank you Belle, Lars. I have calmed down enough from earlier, I think I will go home. Goodnight."
I snap my self home and notice it's not just dark, but quiet. I pull out my phone and use the light to get a switch. I walk to the bedroom and find John sleeping.
My inner eyes roll, exasperated.
'Of course I'm ready to talk and he's asleep.'