**Dedicated to all funny guys**
Jayeola Victor
What the hell is wrong with this kid?
Must he ensure my life is a living hell?
Even if he had just one drop of dignity left in him, he should've known that pranking me with all I told him isumb thing to do but it only shows how heartless he could be.
Yes, I told him it wasn't his business but was it?
For a moment, just a moment, I thought he had little humanity in him. The way he cared when i told him about it, it almost looked like he truly had a heart in him but this only proves he's a total dickhead.
If I had a chance to, I'd hit him on the bead repeatedly with a steel chair.
"What's wrong Diana?!" He yelled from the other side of the classroom "You stuck to your chair?!''
I got stares immediately. It was like they'd been expecting it. Well, I wouldn't blame them, the jerk wouldn't let me prank him and go for free.
At least, he didn't announce my secret and for that I hereby announce that Dylan King gets 0.00000000000001% of my total respect. A round of applause please.
It couldn't have gotten worse when they brought out their phones and started taking pictures and videos of me. The flashes were almost blinding my vision, I had to admit, I kinda felt like a celebrity for a moment.
Don't judge me!
It felt like it was going in slow motion. I could hear my name mixed with laughter echoing I the class. Since I still felt like a celebrity and the opportunity came just once, I did the one thing that came to my mind.
I started posing.
I crossed my legs and plastered a bright smile on my face. I changed my poses constantly as I smiled at their cameras.
I'd never felt better in my entire life.
SPLASH!!
I felt a thick liquid roll down my entire body and my moment as a celebrity ended. With gritted teeth, I took off my glasses and placed them on the table in front of me which, by the way, also had the liquid on it. My fingers made their way to my face, wiping off the liquid from my eye lids. As soon as I could see what was going on, I noticed it wasn't just any liquid.
Dye!
Where the hell did he get a bucket of dye?
That wasn't the real problem. I was covered in dye which would take forever to wash, I was sure my leggings would tear if I even tried to stand up and I had people taking my pictures here and there.
What is it with me and life?!
So where were we? Oh yeah, if I could, I would stand up, walk up to him and smack him on the face once more and this time, it would be in front of the whole class. At least, that would make him feel as embarrassed as I was.
"You angry?!" Dylan yelled "Come on Diana, you're more than this, you should have a plan to prank me right how, shouldn't you? You can just come over and do it now. Oh! I forgot you're stuck to the chair" he paused and came closer "This teaches you a lesson cupcake, never mess with me or else you'll regret it_"
I didn't let him complete his statement before I rubbed my cheeks against his.
"Fucking bitch!" It took him by surprise, it was evident on his face. He brought his hand up to his face and tried to clean it. Keyword: tried.
He ended up smearing more on his face.
For a moment, everywhere went silent before laughter erupted again and this time, it was directed to Dylan.
And the bitch wins again!
He whispered something before walking out of the class. I stayed there, glued to the chair as people took more pictures. They took to their satisfaction and soon enough, they were taking their leave. Some of them dropped silly remarks at me while some praised me for getting him back immediately. What can I say? A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.
After they all left, the only people remaining were I, Esther and a girl I knew nothing about. I'd seen her before because she was in most of my classes but she wasn't the popular one. She was shy and quiet but it didn't take a genius to see she was a nerd. Not that I had a problem against it. Being a nerd is not bad.
She gave me a smile, showing off her braced white teeth but she covered it up after a second. Maybe she didn't like them.
"Wow" Esther said, walking towards me "Just wow"
"Yeah, wow" I replied in a duh tone "Would you quit starring at me and look for a way to get me out of it?"
"Oh yeah! The chair!" She said in realization "I'll need a chainsaw, hammer, knife, glue and syringe"
"What?"
"I'll be back in a second. Don't do anything stupid!" She said as she made her way towards the door.
"Um.... Hi. I'm Natasha" The girl said as she made her way towards me.
"I'm Diana"
"I know" Of course she did. Prank the prank king and be the popular kid. "I have a clothes in my bag you could change to. I know you don't know me but i'm just trying to be nice and besides, I'm a fan of your work"
Thank God for sending angel!
"Thanks!" I said "I'd really appreciate that"
She got her bag from her seat and pulled out bright blue jeans with a denim jacket and a white top. She also placed wipers and some napkins to clean the dye. I took a glimpse of her bag and all I could say was damn. Everything in her bag was arranged accordingly. Right from the biggest books to the smallest and a transparent pack for her pencils. The only reason I'd be as organised as that is if they'd pay me to.
"I'll stand by the door so no one comes in" She said and made her way to the door.
"Thanks" I stood up and heard the leggings rip beneath me. At least, my butt wasn't glued to it too. Anything to save these beautiful cheeks.
I pulled off the clothes I was wearing till I had only underwear on. The dye was so thick, it didn't go through my clothes. I used the napkins to clean the dye first. It stained the napkin immediately. I used it till there was no trace of liquid on my body. However, my skin as still a little pink and it was then I discovered.
It wasn't dye.
If it was, it would've been on my skin but this came off immediately when I used the wipers. I had no idea what it was but I just hoped my skin wouldn't react to it later.
After wiping it off completely, I slipped on the jeans and the white top and wore the jacket over it.
"I have make up to cover your bruises"
Oh shit!
The wiper had wiped off all the make up on my face and I'd changed in front of her which means she knew I had bruises on my body and if she had half a brain, she would know they don't appear on their own. Oh come on!
I would've preferred it if Esther figured out but for a girl I knew absolutely nothing about, I had a feeling j would regret it.
"It's okay" She walked towards me and sat down on a table across me "I get bullied and sometimes they leave marks on me but not as bad as yours"
"Jesus, shouldn't you report that?"
"I did. In fact, I tried countless times but their money buys them out of it. You're not new here, you should know better"
"i'm sorry" I said and placed a hand on her shoulder "I'm actually not good at sympathizing but I feel bad for you"
She laughed and said "You're as funny as I thought you'd be"
Just then, Esther barged into the class with a chainsaw, a knife, glue, hammer and syringe.
How did she get them?!
*~*~*~*~
Guess what?! I have two friends now!
At least, life is not completely against me.
I take those words back.
I'd never enjoyed lunch the way I did that day. At least, after the stunt Dylan pulled earlier, I would please myself with lunch.
Natasha joined Esther and I on our table and so far, she's like a marshmallow. So soft, gentle and sweet. Something far from Esther's character.
She wasn't the type to eat much and that explained how skinny she was. Esther and I were the complete opposite, we ate everything we could eat and I had to admit, it didn't look like I'd be satisfied at the end but i'd gotten used to the fact no food could satisfy me.
"You're gonna eat that?" Esther asked Natasha who was busy playing with her fries and starring at something else.
"No, I had a huge breakfast this morning. You can have it if you want" She said and Esther didn't think twice before munching on the poor fries. Before she knew what was happened, I'd dug her fingers into the fries and took half of it.
"Hey!"
"We just met her today and you're eating her food already?" I asked as I munched on the fries "This will serve as a punishment"
"You're eating it too!"
"Only because it's your punishment!"
"Aren't you going to say anything about this?" She faced Natasha who gaze was channeled to Dylan's table. It was then I noticed she was starring at a particular person.
Yippee! I love teasing!
"Looks like someone is in loooooooooooove"
"What?"
"You and Ryan" Esther wiggled her eyebrows "You know"
"What? No" She turned beet red "No no no no_"
"Care to explain what's going on?"
"He insults me like all the time. You know how much of jester Ryan can be"
"I hate that kid" Esther said and popped a fry in her mouth "He once tried to insult me once and I gave him something he would live to remember"
"You should stand up for yourself"
"Or I can help if you want to. I have some torture devices th_"
"That won't be needed" I cut her off and gave her a glare "Look here Nat, you need to learn to stand up to him or else he won't stop"
"Yeah, I'll do just that"
"You like him don't you?''
"No" She said but it was an obvious lie.
"We know you do. Don't worry, I won't torture him that much just a minute or_"
"There will be no torturing" I said "Talk to him. Tell him you're more than this. He'll definitely learn to respect you"
"I will but not now. Don't mention this to anyone please"
"You can trust us with everything" Esther said "Everything but money and food"
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