Chereads / The Deaf Vampire / Chapter 26 - The Ability to Love Yourself

Chapter 26 - The Ability to Love Yourself

Astrid POV

It's been two days since we've started planning how to get my powers back. And to say I've been on edge is a total understatement, I sat up in my large bed feeling rather homesick. I missed my mother immensely even if she is crazy at times I loved the women to death.

I get up from my bed walking to my large mirror placed on the wall above my desk. My wild mane of hair was literally everywhere and my gold eyes had deep dark circles underneath them. I lifted my hair from one side gazing at my ear in the mirror, I take off one of my pink and white hearing aids.

It's been so long since I've taken off my hearing aids. I set the hearing aid done feeling complete, I remember my first encounter with sign language. It was an early morning I was only 4 years old at the time and my mother thought it would be a good idea to learn sign language.

So that early morning me and my mother walked to the market and there I saw a man signing rapidly to a women. I didn't know what the man was saying and I gazed at my mother who was captured by the language.

My darling Astrid... I only want what is best for you. I want to be able to communicate with you, and so we will learn the beautiful language of Sign language.

These were my mothers words and from that moment on me and mother learned how to sign. We would study day and night really grasping the beauty of sign language. When we mastered it we would sign to each other across the room.

It wasn't until I was twelve when my father saw that I had stopped talking completely. He told me to read lips and to use my own voice instead of hiding behind sign language. He had also gave me my first pair of hearing aids I hated them at first.

My father always hated that I was deaf but I never cared about his opinions. Love only yourself...no matter if you are different know that you are special to me. My mother was always so loving and in this moment in time I missed her dearly.

I wipe my tears getting up to wash my face. I dry my face off patting my cheeks softly, just then I hear a deep knock on my door. I place my hearing aid on quickly revealing a worn out Cohen.

"Hello my love... I wanted to inform you that... my sister Sloane is back". I nod my head still in a daze I let go of the door and slowly walk back to my bed. "Astrid darling... is everything alright" Cohen asks his voice laced with concern.

I just nod my head not willing to use my voice to answer. Cohen walks over to me plopping down onto the bed beside me, just then a thought enters my mind. "Cohen... what if I was no longer deaf... like I wake up one day and I could all of a sudden... hear".

Its quiet for a minute before he speaks "Astrid... are you saying you no longer want to be deaf" he asks me hesitantly. I immediately snap my head towards him with a frown "it's not like I have a choice I've been deaf since I was a little child I'm a lost cause Cohen!

"A-and I can't help but think that maybe just m-maybe if I was normal m-my father would probably love me and wouldn't push me to do things". A sob releases from my mouth and Cohen immediately pulls me into his arms.

Wrapped so tightly he let's me cry onto his shoulder whispering sweet encouraging words. "Astrid to me you are wonderful no matter if you can hear or not my feelings for you will never change".

"But what I think of you does not matter because you have to be able to love yourself". My tears slow down as I listen to his words... never in my life did I ever feel so insecure in this moment. But as all these events came crashing down on me I guess I just broke down.

It was then that I realized I needed to learn how to love myself... for who I am...

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