Chapter 55 Again?
Why was there always a drawback? Lily wondered as she uncomfortably woke, feeling stifled because she was too warm. Severus had moved up against her back after they fell asleep. Initially she was annoyed because he had his arm solidly around her, however then she realized his hand was on one of her breasts. He snored onto the back of her neck. Lily shifted slightly, trying to get more comfortable, and then felt how hard he was against her bottom.
Again? Lily reached for her wand to cast a time charm. Hmm, maybe Sev had rested up enough. She was pretty sure that he had already done it three times. Definitely in the bathtub because she was looking at his face as she straddled him, then when they came out with Lily standing, bent over, holding onto the bedpost, then once more slow in bed.
Was it because they hadn't in a couple weeks, or that Sev was finally building up some stamina to catch up to her and do it more often? Why was she even bothering to think right now?
Lily wiggled her bum against him while pulling up the hem of her nightgown. She rolled her eyes as he grunted something in his sleep before a phlegmy sounding snore indicated that he was not truly waking.
She needed to squirm more to work on the front hem of his nightshirt. Why couldn't this be a night that both their nightclothes rode up to above their waists while they slept? That would make it so much simpler since Sev's body weight kept his right where it was.
As her movement grew more insistent, Severus stirred. Again? He thought to himself as he felt Lily pulling on his nightshirt to get at his cock that she was also rubbing with her arse. He shifted to let her finish getting the fabric out of the way. It was probably already soiled from Lily wiping herself on it. Their sheets got pretty disgusting too, before they charmed them clean again.
He lied still, letting Lily put her upper leg atop his and try to get his cock lined up from behind to spoon together while shagging. After she tried to angle it in an uncomfortable direction one time too many, Severus shifted his hips to give Lily what she wanted.
Rocking against Severus, she thought he had been awake, but then after about ten or fifteen minutes, he started snoring again. What was wrong with him? Sev fell asleep while they're having sex? She elbowed him.
Severus sighed after his rude awakening. What did Lily expect from him? After three times in the past six hours, it was going to take a long time, and it wouldn't happen with her in charge because she was mostly concerned with what felt good for her. Why did she even care if he came again? She couldn't screw herself cross-eyed if he was no longer hard.
It took a long time, but eventually Lily got tired, slowed, then stopped moving as she dozed off.
When she woke in the early morning, Lily's body felt stiff because she still had her leg awkwardly bent back over Sev's. Reaching down with her hand to confirm what she thought she felt, he was still in her … while sleeping. Weird, but kind of lovely in a way. Sometimes it felt she just could not get enough of Sev's body, and it felt reassuring that she could have him there for hours at a time. Exciting too … everything got all achy thinking about shagging for hours at a time. Her nipples became so sensitive she decided to pull off her nightgown because they hurt so much. She wanted them bare.
After the mostly peaceful couple of weeks at the Evans, Severus should have expected Lily to wake him numerous times. It was barely dawn and she was twitching her internal muscles around his cock besides writhing against him with her naked body.
He felt the chill from her pushing the covers down besides the visual evidence she displayed as she turned a bit to show him her chest.
"Thank goodness you're awake, Sev. I need some of that rough stuff you like."
Feeling mischievous since Lily thought Severus moving and actually letting his flesh audibly smack against her was as far as it could go, he grabbed his wand and suggested, "Kneel on the bed and hold your hands close over your head."
"Like this? What …? Hey!"
Severus had secured Lily's hands to the crosspiece of the canopy and began adjusting it while holding her in position, making the restraints a shorter length to stretch her body and barely let her knees rest on the bed.
"Not too uncomfortable?" he asked.
"What are you going to do?"
"You did ask, Lily. From the front or behind?"
"Start with the front."
Severus got into position, then suggested, "Rather than kneeling, wrap your legs around my waist."
"Like this?"
"Hmm."
Afterwards, Lily wanted more rather than getting cleaned up, dressed and getting down to breakfast followed by class. She was too aware of her body. Not just down there, but Sev had taken advantage of her hands being out of the way to torture her breasts too.
His mouth had been so hot and hungry and felt soothing and torturous too. Then there were his hands … Lily's thoughts about Severus were interrupted by the sight of Lupin at the Gryffindor table eating breakfast. She was satisfied that the younger boys were not acting like they were welcoming back one of their long lost heroes.
Heroes should want to save people, not hurt and laugh at them.
Horace Slughorn felt as if his fingers were worn down to the nub. His mail was being redirected to the Hogsmeade post office and opened before he got to read it for himself.
He finally got out to go to a dinner party, but it was at one of his brother Death Eater's homes, where Horace was expected to be his witty, charming self while also talking about some of the excellent ideas the Dark Lord had about reforming society.
Albus better get his arse moving and get him out of here, get this ugly tattoo off his arm, and maybe take him on a relaxing vacation to some tropical island where the girls draped necklaces of flowers around their necks.
His pleasant daydreams about topless native ladies was interrupted by Dolohov.
"You almost done with your new list, Professor?"
"Soon," Horace sighed.
"It is going to be better than that last one?"
Horace was surprised. It sounded like Dolohov was concerned for him. "I'm trying my best," he said in a tone indicating how overwrought he was with all this work and the round of cruciatus he suffered for his first list of likely students ready to join the Dark Lord.
How was Horace supposed to know that the Dark Lord already knew who Severus Snape was? That name was on the top of his first list because if someone deserved to either be in Azkaban or bowing before Tom Riddle, it was that wretch Snape.
After Snape, Horace had listed all Snape's friends – Wilkes, Rosier, Regulus Black, and Barty Crouch Jr. They all had top marks so it was not as if Horace was suggesting poor choices.
Things were actually quiet at Hogwarts for Lily. Now that Mary and Malcolm were together in wherever the married students' quarters were, and Mary said she wasn't allowed to tell her, their rooms were emptier.
They still had the defense study group on Fridays, and all the subjects had been covered at least once prior to the holiday break. There was still practice for the patronus charm, but those that got it, could easily do it without dementors around, and those that couldn't, including herself and Severus, believed they would never cast it. There were still a couple Gryffindors that showed up on Saturdays for Severus to abuse their arithmancy skills, but Lily noted he would show them how to arrive at an answer.
She was annoyed that Severus had started using part of his bath for some potions experiments. At first, it was only one cauldron, then two. Now he had five or six cooking up something. Lily had offered to help, but was only asked to prepare ingredients. Severus did explain a little of it to her, but it was involved with that stupid arithmancy of his.
Severus enjoyed the newfound quiet of their rooms.
Phi liked it too, especially when they moved into Lily's bedroom for sleeping so she could use that window since Severus was more inclined to get up to open it for her when it was in the same room.
Lily still had a number of visitors to their rooms and spent a portion of her time in the Gryffindor common room. She also had a new attitude that she should make the best out of the six months she had remaining at Hogwarts. There were NEWTs of course, but also she realized the amount of time she frittered away could be put to better use.
For Lily's birthday, Severus purposely invited about two dozen students to their rooms for a party with a decorated cake from the kitchens.
She was disappointed because Severus had gotten her a jade necklace inset on an ornate platinum disk on a matching platinum chain to match her dress robes. No ring. Perhaps he was waiting till Valentine's Day?
Meanwhile, Remus had asked about Sirius's return to Hogwarts.
Prongs wanted any leads and expected Remus to find them. A lot of things about the story struck Remus as strange … bizarre strange. However, Sirius waving a dead badger following a quidditch game was not what he found suspicious. The Peruvian darkness powder was something James had been playing around with, not Sirius. Sirius could have gotten some of this own though. Being rare, that was a clue.
Severus Snape had been in their common room when Sirius showed up. This initially sounded like a lead, but then Remus found out Snape was still tutoring Gryffindors in arithmancy every Saturday. Snape was wily enough to keep up the tutoring pretense, but the one Gryffindor arithmancy student that was willing to talk to Remus said that Evans and MacDonald got him to tutor them since there were no Gryffinor seventh years that had the subject. Evans could make Snape do that, without there being some nefarious plot going on. Remus decided to leave that out of his letter to James because he still had some weird infatuation going on with Evans. Every letter since he returned included at the end asked 'P.S. How's Evans? She asking about me?'.
The sixth year boys were involved with tackling Sirius and were willing to give their blow-by-blow account of how it happened. Their description of Sirius sounded exactly like some crazy Padfoot plan to have a party, except he did not bring any food or drink. Was he expecting to go to the Hogwarts kitchen? He was also shirtless, which was not unusual for Sirius, but he had not painted a lion or something red on his chest. Just Padfoot showing off his muscles and chest hair.
Getting back to Snape, the Gryffindors said he lived up to the age-old tradition of Slytherin house and dove behind a couch to hide. That sounded a bit off to Remus. Sure, Snape was smart enough to get behind something, but he cast nothing? Perhaps they missed a tripping jinx or something else, but Snape would not settle for something that mild … oh, in the Gryffindor common room, maybe casting major hexes was a bad idea, in case everyone teamed up with Sirius against him.
Remus summed up for James in a lengthy letter everything he had found out. It sounded like typical Sirius doing something reckless, showing up to find the Gryffindors had lost the game and were not in the midst of a party, tried to call James through the floo to get a party started, and then he got separated from his portkey. It was totally preposterous; therefore it was something Padfoot would do. What about Peter and Sirius's father being murdered? Even if Sirius had nothing to do with either of them, showing up like that did nothing to disprove his involvement.
Although James came up with some crazy ideas, Remus had to agree that Peter must have known something about Sirius. That was the only explanation that he could agree with. Prongs also had the alternate suggestion that it was Snape, but Snape had not made a move against Remus since he returned to school, as far as he knew. At least other Slytherins, especially Regulus Black, and a number of younger students made rude gestures and shot jinxes at him to pay him back for all the wedgies, toilet dunkings, and shoves down the stairs.
Dung finally got away at the beginning of February. He had taken Travers's wand, gotten outside the apparition wards, and got the hell out of there. He was tired of hearing about purebloods, kneeling on the floor, crappy food, water to drink, and acting like he was as clueless as the rest of the prisoners that were deemed not good enough for the Dark Mark. Thank goodness.
He finally got a message to Albus and when they met, the old man had the nerve to remind him, "Don't forget, Dung, you are an escaped criminal."
"Criminal? It's all thanks to you I was even there. Then you left me to rot in Azkaban until the Dark Lord busted me out. And a month of shacking up with him and his sort was no picnic either. You didn't happen to bring anything to drink, did you?"
"I could conjure up some wine."
"Wine? I need the good stuff, Albus. It's been a long dry spell, and I expect you to sort things out. Breaking into the Lestrange house. What did I let you talk me into?"
"It's no longer the Lestranges'."
"I don't give a rat's arse whose house it is or was. I got pissed on by house elves. I got hauled in by the Ministry. I got locked up by them, a speedy trial, and just when I thought you left me to spend two years in Azkaban, the Dark Lord shows up and starts putting magical marks on whoever he deems worthy to be a Death Eater."
"What kind of marks?"
"Skull and snake tattoo. Slughorn's got one."
"Horace?"
"Yeah, he was one of the first to take the Mark."
"Isn't he a prisoner?"
"Slughorn's certainly eating a lot better than me, and he gets his wine, mead, and whatever else he lists as a 'necessity'. Even attended a dinner party. Blooming escaped criminal? Why do I got treated like shit all the time? My whole business is run by me. Can't do it from prison. Can't do it while I'm banging my forehead against the floor and kissing robe hems. You owe me, Dumbledore."
"Pardon me, but I think you're forgetting -"
"Forgetting! How long you gonna hold that over my head? Months in Azkaban and a month with Death Eaters should be payment in full. Now get something settled for me because I have not forgotten you are on the Wizengamot."
"It's not as simple as that, Mundungus."
"Not as simple? Not as simple? I noticed you avoided a trip to the North Sea."
Albus noted the wild look in Dung's eye grew more intense. Initially, he thought it was due to Dung craving alcoholic spirits, but his ordeal may have left him mentally unhinged. He suggested, "Maybe you need some time away."
"Away? My business has suffered terribly while I was incarcerated."
"Couldn't you set up business elsewhere?"
"Like where? Wales?"
"A bit further away, Dung. Wales is part of Great Britain."
"Cornwall then? You can't seriously have me consider Ireland."
"I meant somewhere further. Perhaps Albania?"
"Albania! What the hell is in Albania?"
"Mundungus -"
"I don't want to hear it. I think I'm getting a raw deal here."
"What do you mean?"
"It means this is where we part ways. I can do a hell of a lot better on my own," Mundungus informed Albus. As he turned and walked away, he gave one last cry of, "Albania!" before disapparating.
Things were not going well, Albus had to admit to himself. Dung would be fine. He always was.
He was losing members of the Order faster than he could recruit them, and with Tom's boldness at Azkaban, along with whatever Horace was up to, he was gaining more followers or at least sympathizers every day.
As the fourteenth of February approached, Lily tried to find out from Severus what he wanted to do.
"With Valentine's Day being on a Tuesday, Sev, did you want to do something small that day, and then something really nice for the Hogsmeade weekend?"
"If that's what you want."
"Do you have anything in mind yet?"
"Not really. You don't like flowers. You want bars of Honeyduke's chocolate. That's pretty much it."
"I like flowers."
"What kind? You didn't like the ones I gave you last year."
"I did."
Severus just sighed. Let someone else transfigure flowers for days to get perfect roses and lilies. He did not count a good shag from Lily as a thank you. She could have said something then, rather than almost a year later. Lily also did not indicate she liked the necklace he gave her for her birthday. Perhaps she was paying him back for his lack of appreciation for the spice cake from the Hogwarts kitchen for his birthday earlier in the month. If he did not like it when he turned seventeen, it was easy to guess he would not like it one year later. Severus was not entirely ungrateful because Lily purchased him a new pair of shoes. She was insulted about him still wearing Longbottom's, but Longbottom's were an excellent pair of long-wearing footwear.
He did not feel up to much at the moment because he had spent more time thinking about his parents since it was the beginning of February. Severus was angry that Sirius Black was imprisoned for such a short amount of time, and apparently little was being done to recapture him or the other Death Eaters. He may be getting closer to a substitute for phoenix tears to cut off Dumbledore's income, but it was hard to tell. He had started a correspondence with Healer Pye to inquire about more properties that she may be aware of, and to also prepare for possible testing, if he ever got a sample that could at least heal a cut on himself.
After being awoken on Valentine's Day before dawn for love making, Severus did present Lily with an abundance of pale pink roses and Honeyduke's chocolate. He had reconsidered and thought it would make for less trouble if he observed the holiday with traditional gifts. The dress robes and matching dark garnet ear bobs were ordered in January, prior to Lily's birthday. He had regretted the choice soon after placing the orders because it did not make sense for Lily have a second set of robes that complimented his. She had mentioned wanting a set with the dark bluish maroon when he bought his dress shirt, but she may have changed her mind. Lily said a lot of things she did not mean, or when something else caught her attention.
Lily gave him a single red rose, perfectly formed, and a new belt. If Severus was not Lily's boyfriend long enough, he might end up with more clothes than he ever owned before. He thanked her for the belt. It seemed a bit wasteful to have a new one, when he only had a few months of school left with no one attacking his uniforms. He preferred braces, when not in uniform, because his trousers felt more secure since his hips were barely wider than his waist.
On Saturday, following the before and after breakfast shagging, Severus and Lily queued up with the other students, including the Wilkes, going to Hogsmeade. It was not extremely cold nor windy, and Severus actually needed to take Lily to Gladrags to get those dress robes fitted. They were waiting there, rather than having Lily find them when she looked through his things. He had to leave enough mail laying on his desk for her to find to keep her from looking too hard at other things.
As they crossed the unseen border of the Hogwarts grounds, where apparition became possible, the other grounds-wide magic that prevented unwanted pregnancies was also no longer in effect. Since Lily had asked Severus to stop 'ruining the mood' by continually casting the simple contraception charm because she was casting a more powerful one monthly, there would be no reason for concern, except that Lily had not cast it since December when they were home for the Christmas holiday. She was relying on the contraceptive magic at the castle that Madam Pomfrey had told them about last year.
On the road to Hogsmeade as they walked with the Wilkes, inside Lily it was rather like the illustrations in the books and pamphlets, except not as colorfully pretty with little faces drawn on the sperms circling her egg.
They passed Honeydukes, crowded with both hands-holding couples and single students. The Three Broomsticks also had students waiting to enter queued outside the door.
Mary and Malcolm actually planned to celebrate upstairs in the Hog's Head so they bade Severus and Lily farewell and went off to go get filthy.
"So where to, Sev?" Lily asked.
He had already told Lily that her present was in Hogsmeade this morning, but now that they were so close to Gladrags, Severus's doubts grew. What if she did not like the dress robes and earrings? Both Crouch and Regulus Black noticed Lily's reaction at her birthday party, and later told him that she might have expected something more now that he was so wealthy. They tried to vaguely tutor Severus on the fact that his shortcomings in other areas were supposed to be matched with an increase in material goods. They didn't come right out and say how ugly he was, but he had been this hideous prior to inheriting money from his parents' murderers and shown he was bright enough to actually earn money as something more than a servant. However, they did agree if Lily kept claiming they were good friends than Severus was not obligated to procure her any costly jewelry.
When Severus did not answer her, Lily turned to look directly at him. There was a pained look on his face. Sev was not usually forgetful so she wondered if something had not gone right.
"What's wrong?"
"I … maybe you won't like it."
"What?"
His eyes shifted evasively for a number of seconds before he lowly admitted, "It was something you said last year … might not have meant it or changed your mind. I'm no good at this."
Lily made a face. Sev was getting all negative and moody when there was no reason. He never got her bad or inappropriate presents, even when he made them. In frustration, Lily complained, "I haven't even seen it yet, Sev. Let's go."
"All right," he responded with a sullen slump to his shoulders, and walked beside Lily to Gladrags.
When they got there, and Lily saw the dress robes, a rich black fabric with dagged layers of that maroon Sev liked along with a deep, royal purple, she liked them. It might not be something she'd pick out for herself, however the outfit looked impressive.
Relieved that Lily did not refuse the robes and patiently allowed them to have a final fitting, Severus handed her the small hinged box flocked with black velvet with a gold hinge and clasp. Her eyes widened in delight as she took it from his hand, but he saw her disappointment when she opened it.
Earrings! What was Sev thinking? This was Valentine's Day. How did he reach eighteen and still be so clueless about holidays? Lily would expect something like earrings from her parents.
Remus had written back to James telling him he thought it was a bad idea to meet him in Hogsmeade. Prongs was under the misconception that the Marauders were still beloved by most of the students and the legends of their pranks were still on everyone's lips.
The sixth year Gryffindors barely spoke to Remus now. They used to be favorite targets in the Gryffindor boys' baths of the Marauders until another year of younger students started. At least the lads remembered Remus never cast anything on them so they weren't openly hostile.
James ignored Moony's nonsense about no one fondly remembering him. He played professional quidditch for Merlin's sake, and he did it his way and blew off school and NEWTs to do it because he was a sensational chaser, playing professionally at only the age of seventeen.
They met at the Three Broomsticks, and James didn't care that Moony was trying to tell him that maybe a private room would be better. Why? He was here to talk about catching Sirius Black, and maybe convince Remus to give all this school nonsense up. It was laudable to want to finish his education, but really, who was going to hire Remus, even if he got a bunch of NEWTs?
Disappointed that Remus had not gotten a better lead on where Sirius could be hiding out, James walked out of the pub with Moony next to him when he saw Evans. How perfect was that? He would gladly go back inside to have a butterbeer, or whatever she wanted, with her. He had hours before he was due at his parents for dinner before portkeying back to Portugal.
He saw Snape skulking slightly behind Evans, carrying her shopping. James cast a Jelly Legs Jinx at Snivelly for old times sake and asked, "All right, Evans?"
Lily made a face of disgust. What the hell was Potter doing here? Didn't he have something else to do with himself after getting chucked out of school? Now the Gladrags bag was on the ground because he could not resist jinxing Severus. What a toerag. "Leave us alone, Potter." Noticing Lupin next to him, she added, "And you too, Lupin."
"Uh …." Remus was at a loss for an explanation. Prongs may not have any cares since he was already expelled, but Remus could get in big trouble.
"Piss off, Potter," growled Severus, reversing the jinx. He kept his eyes on Potter, but tried to see if there was a teacher around before hexing the dunderhead bald so he'd have no hair left to play with. Meeting Potter in the middle of Hogsmeade was no accident.
"Tsk, tsk, language," James replied, ready to cast a scourgify at Snape's mouth, but was interrupted by a horrible screeching noise. Some mangy old crow had winged into the middle of them and sounded like it was choking to death. It barely slowed its fall to the ground in front of his feet.
Severus knew Phi was all right. She claimed to have spotted a teacher. While she distracted Potter, Severus glanced quickly around. He saw a lot of students. There were no teachers.
When he saw James lean over to look at that raven, who Remus suspected was Snape's familiar but was not entirely sure, he warned him, "Don't -"
Lily was also warning Potter, "Don't you -"
Phi pecked sharply at the toe of one of Potter's dress shoes before launching upwards to get back in the air.
"Yow!" James exclaimed over his stabbed toe, now completely justified in putting this ugly feather duster out of its misery, however it leaped straight at his face and he fell backwards in surprise. Stupid bird was not going to get the better of him. It was such a bright, clear day that he could still clearly see it. "Incend-"
"Expelliarmus."
"Hey!"
"Mr. Potter, I will mail your wand to the Ministry," Prof. Flitwick informed him. "And I will include a full explanation about you intentionally waiting in Hogsmeade to attack Hogwarts' students. Mr. Lupin, you will return to the castle with me."
"But-," Remus protested.
"I realize it is tradition for the students to go to Hogsmeade the Saturday after Valentine's Day, but you did choose to accompany your old friend while he proved that he has not learned a single thing since he was a student."
Severus realized why he did not see a teacher. From his vantage point, he could not see Flitwick among the students while Phi could from overhead. Likewise, it was doubtful Flitwick saw Potter cast anything at him. Potter would tell some idiotic story about how Severus deserved whatever he got, and he'd get patted on the back while Dumbledore reversed his decision and admitted Potter back to Hogwarts as a hero. Was Potter going to continue lurking around ready to hit him with a jinx his whole life? He bent down to pick up Lily's new robes, still boxed and bagged, wondering why he even bothered with anything.
"How about a butterbeer, Evans?" James invited, not the least bit deterred.
"No," Lily replied, already heading down the street towards Hogwarts.
"But Evans -"
"Go away."
Severus noted that she was not even bothering to see if he was following her. He could be a prick and head the other way, but there was nothing that he wanted to do in Hogsmeade. Why couldn't Lily have flounced off towards the Hog's Head? With a sigh over his decision to return to Hogwarts anyway, he gave Potter some fast-growing toenails nonverbally while some other students accosted him. They were braver when Potter did not have his wand, or Lupin to back him up.
He caught up to Lily who had stopped to wait for him.
"Sorry, Sev. Are you all right?"
"Yes."
"Potter's such a toerag. He's seventeen or eighteen now. Why does he keep doing this stuff like he's a first year?"
"Criminal mentality?"
Lily then launched into her analysis of Potter which lasted the entire walk up to the castle and up to the fourth floor to their rooms. Severus may revisit Potter in his mind to formulate new strategies to protect himself, but he never walked around talking to himself about them.
He did not want people thinking he was obsessed with Potter or Black. Or Dumbledore. Or even Slughorn. Severus should not forget about Slughorn. Potter proved that even if his enemies, even those that claimed they merely attacked him because they couldn't stand the sight of his greasy, big-nosed, ugly person, no longer saw him on a daily basis or could avoid him entirely, they'd still return to harass, hurt, and embarrass him for fun.
Severus put the robes down on the sofa for Lily to do as she pleased. With Potter, Lily talking about Potter for close to thirty minutes, and before that Lily not happy with anything he did, Severus chose to retreat to his room and lie down.
Lily had thought Severus was right behind her when she went into her room to get his gift. It was not a large box, but she had wrapped it very nicely for him in red paper with hearts and a ribbon and extravagant bow that was clearly a charm, since no one, not even Petunia, could get one that elaborate without magic.
Tired of waiting for him, she went into the common room and instead of finding Severus, she saw her bag from Gladrags by itself. Those robes were really beautiful. All that black made her skin look paler, but in a dramatic sort of way. She just had to stay out of the sun to keep freckles off her face.
She tried the robes on again with the earrings and a pair of black shoes. Lily considered all the clothing she'd have to clean out in late June when she was home and combined both her home clothes with her old school clothes, besides her wizarding outfits. She'd need more robes. Not dress robes, but everyday stuff.
After she put everything away, Lily started to wonder what happened to Severus. Was he miffed because she had not carried his present to Hogsmeade? Why did Sev have to be so moody sometimes? Or maybe not, he was probably back with his arithmancy and potions, and forgotten all about their big day together.
She knocked on his bedroom door, calling, "Sev?"
After a moment, she heard his reply, "What?"
"What are you doing?"
"Lying down."
"Lying down?"
"Yes," he replied loud enough for her to hear through the door.
Severus had been lying on his bed thinking about the loss of his parents, the unlikeliness of Lily ever being more than his best friend and lover whenever she found it convenient. He also found more people he definitely disliked at Hogwarts than those he cared to converse with, but he had pretty much known that one for years.
Lily opened the door, asking, "Why are you lying down? Are you sick?"
"Not really."
Severus had hardly anything lit in here. She did see he was lying on his side so she went over to the huge bed, asking, "What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
Lily frowned. Severus's eyes looked too shiny, but he did not appear to be crying. She sat down on the bed next to him, put her hand on his arm and commented, "Potter?"
"No," he replied sullenly. Potter was a problem, but if he persisted, Severus could take care of him.
"You did the right thing, Sev. If you cast something at him, you'd be the one in trouble."
Potter. Why did Lily want to keep talking about Potter? They weren't having much of a Valentine's Day celebration anyway since she did not like his gifts. Things had been better when he had no money, and Lily had no expectations.
After giving Severus plenty of time to reply, Lily held out the wrapped present towards his face and said, "I had your gift in my room."
"Oh."
"Take it."
Severus shifted to sit up and took the cube from Lily. He was no good at guessing what wrapped things were. It was weighty.
Since Lily was waiting, he unwrapped it. A wooden box with a glass sphere thing inside. He took it out. Only the top was rounded, the bottom was sort of like a child's top. It had colorful things in the glass dome. Oh … a sneakoscope.
"Thank you."
"It's all right?" Lily asked. Barty Crouch (Jr.) had recommended it. His fellow Slytherins thought more like Sev. Severus was also practical so she couldn't just pick anything, even a book.
"Yes," he replied. Severus had some vague knowledge that there were poor ones and good ones, but he doubted Lily would intentionally purchase a poor one. She probably went for one that was the prettiest. "We just need someone to get up to something around it to try it out."
"Maybe we can do something with the Defense group."
"No, it'll work better if no one knows I have it."
A sneakoscope was uncertain since it would also signal when the target had nothing planned against Severus, but against others or just up to no good in general. Actually, what Severus really wanted was a foe glass. He should check all the mirrors at the Lestrange houses. People like that had a lot of enemies, too much money, and more items than they could ever use.
"So why are you back in bed before dinner, Sev?" Lily omitted the 'without me' that was in her mind. Something bothered him. It was probably Potter. He wouldn't want to admit that James Potter still bothered him.
"I don't feel like doing anything, Lily."
"Why not?"
"It's everything. My parents, you, Hogwarts … I can't do anything right."
Lily had no reply regarding Sev's parents. Their deaths still bothered him, especially his mother's. Lily understood it somewhat due to her father dying, but she thought he wasted too much time dwelling over it since they weren't very good parents. Things were much better for Severus now. And Hogwarts? Sev was head boy. What more did he want? This stupid arithmancy and potions project of his was going nowhere, and now he was blaming everything around him for his disappointment. The couple of early successes had gone to his head.
She put her arms around him, murmuring, "Don't worry about all that, Sev."
Severus was relieved that Lily wasn't offering falsehoods to assure him that she loved everything about him.
Together they shifted to lie down, holding each other.
Lily had been using cheering charms on Severus. He was annoyed, but it got him out of bed and to class, along with continuing to work on his project to undermine Dumbledore. It did not change anything. People hated him. People wanted him dead. People went out of their way to mock and make fun of him. Lily found him convenient, nothing more.
It was while he was still giddy from a charm that he got into a lengthy conversation with Summerby in the library. He knew she was smart, liked to read, and was interested in a lot of the things he was.