Cool rosewater flowed down her skin. The serene bath gave Sakura time to let her thoughts simmer in her head. A gust of wind rustled in her ears. She wanted to stay in that serenity. Everything awaiting her was daunting but this quiet bath was where she was safe. She and Marion fell into a comfortable silence. Marion leaned over to scoop some water and began to murmur to the spirits.
"Let the heaviness of the world leave your mind. Listen to the voice in your heart. The spirits will reach you if you open yourself to them."
The cadence in Marion's voice lulled Sakura into a brief slumber. All the sensations of the outside world faded away. The whispers of spirits echoed distantly. Clashing thoughts of fear, war, joy, excitement, sadness and destruction bound her consciousness. Her heartbeat raced. Different threads came together to weave a chaotic scene in her mind.
Control slipped through her hands. Sakura was falling through an endless pit of uncertainty. She could do nothing but watch as the world she knew grew smaller and smaller. Turning into nothing but a pinprick of light in a sea of nothingness. She wanted to scream but her voice was silent. Her hands reached out and they hung painfully above her body as if she was a puppet hanging from a string. Why couldn't she do anything? She didn't want to fall. She didn't want to disappear. A thud landed behind her head and everything went blank.
Darkness spread as far as the eye could see. Her feet hit the ground and she didn't stop pushing herself forward. Anxiety tore her apart but she was forced to keep herself together. Her body burned in agony. Every part of her was screaming for her to stop. Her instinct told her to not stop, never stop until the exhaustion consumed her last breath. She could hear the slithering serpents of despair catching up to her, threatening to constrict her, to have her writhe in their embrace until she gave into death. She would never give into them.
"Amada.... you can't escape me," a voice hissed in the deafening silence. A blankness spilt through her mind. Like a drop of ink in water, it spread rapidly, staining the clear existence. She pushed through her waning energy to block it from consuming her. No, it wouldn't win over her.
A slit of light shone brightly in the shadows. She reached out to the light. That was the only way out. Every step lied to her that it was the final step to freedom. She didn't care. She just needed to make it. She could make it. Her fingers touched the edge of the light. Amada lurched her body into the portal. Just as she reached her escape, a spear pierced through her skin.
Her vision blurred. She fell through the border between worlds. Exhaustion and pain fought each other to the end. Her fingers touched the tip of the crooked spear that made its way through her heart. It seemed unreal. She smiled knowing that she couldn't make it. At least she died fighting. Her throat contracted and she coughed out white blood into her hand. She let it drip into the void. Her memories flashed through her mind. Happiness, despair, affection, loss. The pain didn't even register any more. Everything was ceasing to exist. The last thing her pink eyes caught sight of was a new world awaiting her.
Sakura's eyes shot open. She filled her lungs to the brim in a full gasp. The illusion of exhaustion drained out of her body. Her eyes shot to take in the world around her. The jasmines were still floating around her. Sakura's hand flew to her spirit mark. Her heart was still intact beating in her chest. She leaned against the tub. Gasps made her chest fall up and down.
Marion stopped pouring rosewater. Concern welled up in her eyes.
"What's wrong?" she asked, her satin voice laced with worry.
Sakura took a jasmine flower in her hands. Her fingers ran through the delicate petals. How easy would it be to crush it in her hands? Was she nothing more than a fallen flower? Nothing more than to be looked at and wilt away no matter what?
"Nothing," she lied. "Just woke up from a sudden nap."
Marion saw right through her. For Marion, searching through herself to understand spirits made it easier to understand others. She didn't let lies pass her. A sigh escaped her mouth. She tilted her head. Her eyes searched through Sakura.
"I'm sorry, the spirits aren't always kind. Sometimes they give us unpleasant visions. Don't worry," she soothed. Her hand came up to pat Sakura's head. Sakura looked away. "You're safe here."
She curled up in the tub. The sound of crickets and flowing water was becoming deafening. The rosewater was freezing her to the core. How fast could everything change? Why was she feeling that way? She hated how sensitive she became after such a simple incident.
Seeds of fear had been planted into her mind. Those memories told her a foreboding fate. All the fears she had after being told she was a spirit soul came back in full force. She wouldn't be alive if Amada wasn't killed. To be kept alive only by a spirit... was she truly herself or was she bound to Amada? Or was she no one but Amada? Does one life have to be sacrificed to save another? Sakura held her head in her hands.
Why was she chosen when she was so powerless?
"It's okay," Marion reassured. "Come out of the tub, we'll dress you and you can wish to the spirits. It'll make you feel better."
Sakura rose to her feet. Water flowed down from her covering. The weight of it mirrored the weight she felt within herself. She shook off the feeling. No, she wouldn't give in to the desire to let everything consume her. To be a Commander meant to stand facing any towering might that faced her.
She stepped out of the tub and headed to the stall. In the darkness of the wooden walls, she sighed. The day was for celebration and joy. She straightened her back. A smile plastered on her face. Everything was going to be alright. She just had to keep holding on with the help of her friends. She refused to go down in fear.
Sakura kept telling herself that. Even with her best efforts, there was a fear that didn't stop its whispers. The best she could do was ignore them.
She wrung the water out of the covering before hanging it up and drying herself off. Sakura dressed up back in her uniform. She put on her school shoes and exited the stall. Marion waited for her outside with a smile on her face. She picked up the slippers and towel. Marion held out an arm. Sakura stared at her for a minute before realising. Marion giggled as Sakura finally took her arm with blushing cheeks. They walked together to where she would be dressed.
They arrived at a house with a red roof and heavy doors. They took off their shoes at the steps leading up to the house. Sakura stood in front of the door and traced the carvings with her finger. There was a carving split between the two doors. It was of a prosperity spirit with its wings spread. Its eyes seemed to follow her. There was a strange semblance of life within it, rippling and wavering. Behind it was carvings of bountiful harvests and piles of riches. Her arm dropped to her side and took another look. The carving was just a carving. Its eyes were blank and unseeing.
Marion put her hand against the spirit's and the door eased open. Sakura pushed it further. The house was an open space with reed mats covering every inch of the floor. Sunlight streamed in from the round windows. Red wooden chests sat spaced from one another. The wall facing the doors were lined with dressers. Yukika sat in front of a dresser with a couple of maidens by her side, one brushing her hair that hung right below her ears and another smoothing out her gold robe.
Yukika noticed her in the mirror and turned around. Sakura was caught off guard. A light dusting of powder over her pale face made her skin gleam. A red gloss was dabbed on her lips, drawing attention to their softness. Her eyes were subtly lined to make her eyes even more piercing. A crown of golden branches rested on her head. Yukika looked even more flawless than she already was. She seemed to have stepped out of a fairytale.
Yukika bit her lip at seeing Sakura gape at her. "I know, I look overdone," she was quick to say. Sakura shook her head.
"No, no! You look great!" she objected. Surprise lifted her face.
"You think so?" Yukika asked in a quiet voice. Sakura nodded. She made a conscious effort to draw her eyes away from Yukika's red lips. She wasn't used to seeing Yukika in makeup. That must have been why it astounded her.
"Yeah! You look beautiful! I mean, you always look beautiful, you don't have to wear makeup but you just look really good, um-" she stumbled over her words. Marion laughed. A smile played on Yukika's lips. She patted the space next to her.
"Thank you. You should sit, it's your turn to be all dressed up."
Sakura sat down, her face burning up. Yukika's gaze that never moved away from her didn't help. Marion opened one of the red chests and pulled out a long golden robe. Its embroidery shone in the sunlight. Sakura frowned. The robe would be far too long for her short legs. Yukika laughed and leaned towards her.
"Don't worry, I'll hold the extra fabric for you, Princess," she whispered in her ear. Despite Yukika's cold breath, her ear burned with the force of a thousand fires. Princess.... she had never felt like one. But the way Yukika said it made her feel like the princess of the world.
"It's alright, we can adjust the length easily," said Marion. There was a twinkle in her eye. "Unless you want to wear a child's robe."
Sakura snapped from one side to the next in the speed of light. She would have propelled her head into the exosphere with her shaking if need be. Everyone laughed. She stood up to put on the robe.
"You can put it over your uniform, but you can take off your tie and vest," instructed Marion. "Don't worry, you won't forget them."
Sakura followed the instructions given. She loosened her tie and took off her vest. It was much easier to breathe and move without them. Marion helped her put on the robe. The powdered maiden gathered up the long fabric and pinned it to the right length. Sakura's heart fluttered as Marion's fingers meticulously roved around her body to make sure everything was as it should be. Marion stood back, satisfied with how the little Defender looked in her golden robe.
She sat back down and let the powdered maidens flutter around her. They turned her head from side to side, surveying how to make her look best. A dash of powder here, a dab of gloss there. They spritzed her with scented oils from head to toe. She sneezed at the strong smells wafting to her nose. A maiden pulled at her hair and tied it up tight in a topknot. After much suffering, they fell away to let her look at herself.
Sakura didn't recognise herself. Her lips were drawn to mimic a supple pout. Her round eyes were accentuated with thick cat eyes and long eyelashes. All her flaws had been masked with a sheen of powder. She blinked and her reflection blinked as well. It wasn't just a doll staring back at her.
Was it the spirits or the smell of all the oils making her eyes well up? She never thought she was ugly but she never thought she could be pretty, either. It was as if she finally turned the lock into a room she never knew existed. Is that what it was like to look in the mirror and like what you see? To be satisfied with who you are at the moment?
"Look at how cute you are," a maiden cooed. Marion rustled through the chest again. She lifted something out of it. It was a gold hairpiece in the shape of a flower. Sakura's eyes widened as she recognised the flower.
"Is that...?"
Marion smiled and kneeled to put it in her hair. "Yes, it's a cherry blossom. Also known as sakura. Isn't it beautiful?" she said. Sakura took another look at herself. The gold glinted in the sun. Her fingers reached up to touch the petals. Each petal dipped into a V, almost shaped like a heart. She had never seen a cherry blossom except in old illustrations. The hairpiece was the next best thing for her.
She wondered to herself if Amada ever saw a cherry blossom in her many previous lives. How many experiences had Amada witnessed from dwelling in previous bodies? How many memories could Amada hold that she would never experience?
"Woaaaaah, is that Sakura or a princess?" she heard someone exclaim behind her. She turned and saw Angie and Citrine coming in. Angie made a running start and slid along the reed mats on her knees. An uneven surface on the mats sent her hurtling towards them. Angie finished her entrance by laying languidly across the mat when she stopped rolling. "Hey, how are you doing?" she asked in a faux-seductive voice. The powdered maidens giggled.
Angie and Citrine sat at another two dressers and let the maidens prepare them. The maidens told them tales of spirits and strange occurrences in the temple, making them laugh and shiver. At that moment, it was wonderful to be herself. Instead of losing herself in a game or imagining being a movie character, for the first time in a long while, Sakura just wanted to be herself and to enjoy what that meant.
They finished preparing. Citrine looked beautiful even in her hair in two cute loop pigtails and the lightest dab of makeup. Angie's curls were tied into a bun and her skin and lips tinted with rose gold. The maidens admired their work. The heavy doors opened once again and the senior maiden walked in.
"It's almost time for your celebration," she announced. "Come and give your wishes to the prosperity spirits before the rest arrive."
They all got up. The maidens checked on them one last time, straightening and adjusting whatever they felt fit. The Defenders and maidens walked back together to the shrine. The gold robes glittered in the sun. Their pins and crowns dazzled their hair. If anyone saw them, they would have thought that the group had stepped out of olden times. Four sun princesses descended from the heavens and their fair clad-red servants.
The entourage arrived at the shrine. They moved away from the main entrance into an open space that served as the shrine's courtyard. Instead of walls, statues of prosperity spirits stood tall to surround them. Mikhail and Astros sat by one of the statues, engaged in conversation. Curiously, Mikhail did most of the talking, his eyes sparkling with excitement. A large empty altar drew their attention immediately as they entered the courtyard. Yukika tensed up upon stepping on the smooth floors. Sakura looked at her.
"Is there something wrong?" she asked. Yukika's eyes roamed the space. She shook her head. Her eyes remained uneasy but the way her face turned away told Sakura that it was something that Yukika would rather resolve on her own. She wanted to say something but she put her trust in Yukika.
One maiden walked with them to the altar with a basket of flowers and another rushed to light up any candles that went out. Each of them picked a flower from the basket to place on the altar. They sat with their legs folded underneath them. Sakura closed her eyes.
Fear swirled around in her mind. Sakura attempted to push it down. It rose back up to tower over her. Its gaping maw threatened to devour her helpless form. She squeezed her eyes tight to banish the thought out of her mind. She held a green orchid in her hand and it trembled in her grasp.
'Prosperity, come to me...'
A prosperity spirit swooped in to latch onto the fear. The fear yowled and bit onto the winged spirit's throat. Prosperity tore the fear away, spouting blood. Gold threads wrapped around prosperity's arm and spun together to form a spear. The one-armed spirit knocked the fear onto its back. The fear retaliated by raising its gigantic claws. The claws sank into the winged spirit's chest and ripped down to form a gory gash. Wincing in pain, the prosperity's spear sunk into the fear's chest. One final roar rocked the darkness in her mind.
The fear spirit dissipated into a fog. The gold spear retracted back into the prosperity spirit's arm. Sakura looked up at the giant drops of blood flowing down the spirit's chest. It smiled at her despite the pain. A hand landed tenderly on her head.
"Fight honourably, child and luck will be by your side," its tinkling voice echoed the walls of her consciousness. Sakura floated in a warm sea of relief and hope. She held up her green orchid to it. It knelt and accepted it from her. Its twinkling gold eyes put a smile on her face. Its wings stirred up a fierce gale. Sakura put her arm over her eyes.
Sakura opened her eyes. The green orchid was gone. A light burned bright in her heart. She looked up to the altar where a small prosperity spirit statue stood. Her eyes sparkled. Perhaps the statues held more than they seemed. Angie turned to her and ooohed.
"Your offering was accepted so fast!" Angie exclaimed. Citrine leaned over and grinned. She showed her empty hands. Angie's face was white with shock. "What did you say to the spirits?" she asked.
Citrine winked. "It's a secret," she said. Sakura nodded along and giggled. Angie pouted at both of them. They all leaned over to look at Yukika. She was staring into the distance. Her water lily had disappeared. Her gaze was directionless.
"Yukika...?" Sakura was about to say but loud footsteps stopped her words.
"Congratulations, Otherworld Defenders!!!" a cacophony of voices called out. Yukika snapped out of her stupor. They turned to see an avalanche of their schoolmates rushing into the courtyard. Ms Limon and a few other teachers were quick to direct everyone to sit on either side of the courtyard, boys on the left and girls on the right. The Defenders were assigned to sit at the entrance of the courtyard facing the altar. They formed a square with good space between the boys, girls and Defenders.
Principal Blair gave a speech about how happy she was that six students were picked from Emelda Academy. Many schools had only one or two chosen and more had none picked at all. She spoke about how it proved how much their school's students had potential that just had to be polished. Sakura almost fell asleep from all the routine words being thrown around. Yukika stayed alert, her eyes darting around the courtyard.
Right before sleep overcame her, Principal Blair ended her speech and the sound of banging drums resounded. Her eyes shot open. The dance club came to the middle of the square. They wore white flowy dresses that fluttered with every movement they made. They announced how they were dedicating their dance to their dear Citrine who was about to depart to fight in the Spirit Burst.
They began their dance, showing off their limber muscles as their bodies flowed to the music. Light steps tapped against the smooth ground. Their coordination was impeccable, their actions perfectly mirrored by each other. They looked effortless spinning through the square.
Sakura turned to Citrine to gauge her reaction. Citrine's eyes were closed and an odd expression twisted her face. Her body was tense in seeming agony. Sakura's heartbeat raced. Her muscles went weak. She couldn't speak. Citrine abruptly stood up. Dozens of eyes stuck to her. Citrine lifted her robes and stepped forward according to the rhythm of the drums. Her eyes stayed closed but she seemed to know where to move to avoid colliding with anyone.
Her fellow dancers circled her, surprised but unwilling to stop their dance. Citrine's arms rose above her head. Her hands rotated around each other. Citrine flapped her arms like a bird. She ran from one direction to the next, shooting her arm out as if to grab something. Her arms stretched out farther and farther with each reach she made. A smile played on her face and her steps were light. She spun like a top that never slowed down. Her friends lowered themselves to the ground, enraptured by her strange dance. So was everyone else. The gathering was silent, the only sound coming from the endless round of drums.
Citrine stopped. She didn't seem dizzy at all. Her body jerked back and forth as if she was being shot. She stepped forward holding her abdomen. Her eyes shot open. Sakura was dumbstruck. Her eyes were completely devoid of any emotion. She didn't seem to be aware of anything she was doing. She turned to the left and right like she was being pulled by invisible forces. The drums turned anxious. Citrine's feet hit the ground aggressively. The stomps sounded painful.
"Yukika," she called out to her friend. Her voice could barely be heard. She found it hard to breathe. Yukika's eyes were watching Citrine, frozen in indecision. "Yukika, what's happening?" she asked.
"It's fear spirits," Yukika whispered. "They're controlling her and making her dance like that. The way she's dancing is spreading fear and making them more powerful."
Sakura's eyes widened. She mouthed, "What do we do?"
Yukika was still. She turned to Sakura and noticed how weak she looked. Sakura was ready to collapse to the ground. The anxiety in the air suffocated her. Yukika got to her feet. Determination pulsed through her fingertips. She stepped forward much like Citrine, following the beats of the drums.
She shot out her arm and grabbed Citrine. Citrine tried to pull away from her but Yukika held on tight. Yukika spun her around before pulling her close. Everyone was in awe that the distant girl would put herself in front of the crowd. Yukika pulled something from behind Citrine's neck. A string of black snow fell to the ground. Life rushed back to Citrine's eyes. Surprise danced on her face. Sakura couldn't take her eyes off them as they twirled together. They intertwined their hands, swapping from one hand to the other. One foot stomped then the next. Yukika's powers flew out of her free hands. White daggers of light pierced the air. The daze that hung over everyone was broken. They ended with a flourish, with Citrine holding onto Yukika as she bent backwards to face the sky. Yukika's hand arched up and a fountain of snow spouted out.
Thunderous applause rumbled through the crowd. Yukika held up Citrine as they walked back to their spots. A fit of odd jealousy twined around Sakura's heart. How elegant and easy they made it all seem. Citrine fell to the ground panting.
"Hey, are you okay?" Angie asked worriedly. Citrine rubbed her eyes. She nodded. They all breathed out in relief. A maiden appeared to give them all a cup of pomegranate juice. Sakura downed it, letting the tart juice relieve her parched throat.
The air turned much lighter than it was before. Yukika relaxed and the others took it as a sign to relax as well. Despite their alert eyes, the rest of the celebration went smoothly, with melodious drums and echoing gongs signalling a prosperous new beginning. The drums mirrored their beating hearts, hoping that all would be well. The celebrations were a time of joy and after a torturous wait, joy finally arose in them. Their fear was silenced. All eyes could witness the Defenders laughing with each other once more.