Shane's days slowly began to fall into a routine. Hee was a fan of order. It ensured that there were no unforeseen variables. If he knew what each day would bring, she could better control his world.
However, it felt strange to have a routine while a ticking time bomb in his mind. A heavy reminder that not everything was in his control.
Jihoon, on the other hand, was completely random. He never did anything consistently. He liked to goof off in class or sleep, but never with any rhyme or reason. More often than not, he'd be in the computer lab instead of class because he went there to play games.
Jihoon had an odd skill for getting away with doing as little work as possible and staying in the teachers' good graces. Probably because he had a wickedly boyish face with an equally mischievous grin. It worked well to get him his way.
Shanee hardly spoke to anyone during the school day. It was one of his top coping mechanisms. Ignore everyone until they started ignoring him, too. The only exception was Jihoon. He would say casual hellos to Him in the hallway. Inviting him constantly to sit with him and his friends at lunch (the accompanying glares from Minjae would have stopped him if he hadn't already started eating lunch alone on the outside steps).
But the only place Shane couldn't avoid Jihoon was the bus. It had become a strange part of his routine. He'd always sit beside him, babbling about his day, asking her questions about his. And when Shane didn't answer, he'd just keep rambling on.
It was an odd, new experience, to have someone who sat with him, talked with him. And annoyed the living daylights out of him.
Shane started to recognize his small habits. How he tapped his fingers against any surface, a mindless action. How he accepted everyone and in turn people gravitated toward him. Even Shane, though he hated to admit it, was starting to feel more comfortable around him.
Making his way out of the school building, Shane scanned the courtyard. Not to look for a specific person, he told himself, but when he didn't see a lanky form with ruffled hair, he was disappointed.
Jihoon had been held after class to talk to the teacher. He was a horrible student, almost laughably bad.
Shane walked out the school gates, shuffling his feet. he felt oddly reluctant to leave, like being outside of campus meant it would be harder for Jihoon to find him. Which was ridiculous, as the bus stop was within view of the front steps. He settled against the bus shelter.
Two boys ambled up, leaning against the opposite side of the glass. One was tall, with pointed features, like a rat. The other was wide, a lumbering boy. The taller, ratty boy slapped a pack of cigarettes against his palm. They were banned on school grounds, but perhaps the boy felt confident since he stood several meters outside of campus.
Shane practically felt his stare on himself and ignored them both. They were the same dudes that had fought with him the other day.
Shane craned his neck to the side to see if Jihoon was coming out of the school.
Instead, Seojun was making his way to the curb.
"Shane-ssi." Seojun used the formal title, like his manners overwhelmed the fact that they were peers. It was something he secretly liked, his politeness. "Are you waiting for the bus alone?" He looked around, and Shane knew he searched for Jihoon.
"Why wouldn't I be?" it came out harsher than he meant it to be. And something about Seojun softened his heart.
"Would you wait with me a bit?"
The shy boy blushed, gave a small nod, and sat, keeping half a meter of space between them. SHane couldn't help it, he grinned. He was used to people being awestruck by his charisma, but Seojun's admiration felt so innocent.
"He's a good guy," Seojun decided to break the ice between them.
"Who?"
"Jihoonie. He's a good guy. I know it might seem like he's lazy and doesn't care, but he does," Seojun said. "You've probably noticed I'm not as cool as him or Minjae. But they've never once made me feel like I don't belong."
"Are you being a wingman?" Shane Couldn't keep the amusement from her voice.
"He didn't ask me to say anything," Seojun said quickly. He held up his hands like he'd been caught doing something wrong. "But I can tell he likes you. I'm hoping you like him, too, and if you don't, I'm hoping you'll let him down easy. Jihoon puts up a brave front but he's been through some stuff. Being the resident gay guy is not easy."
"Been through stuff? Like what?"
Seojun shook his head. "It's not my place—"
"Everyone knows about Park Jihoon's a faggot because his father left him. His mother has never been seen. Makes you wonder what secrets he's hiding that made both of his parents leave him," the rat-like boy said.
Shane's eyes tracked down to his uniform name tag: JUNG JAEGIL.
Shane abhorred bullies.
Behind him stood the larger boy. His name tag read MIN SEHO. It seemed like Jaegil was the mouth and Seho the muscle—a bully cliché if Shane had ever seen one.
"That's none of your business," Seojun said, but his voice wavered with fear.
"You're the one who brought it up," Jaegil said with a shrug. "Trying to impress a pretty boy, faggot number two?"
"That's not it at all!" Seojun sputtered.
"Good, because you should know better," Jaegil said. "people don't talk to losers like you, no matter how much money your father makes."
Seojun hunched and Jaegil grinned. He was already reveling in the pain he'd inflicted.
It made Seojun despise him even more. Maybe that was why she
did such an uncharacteristic thing next.
"He's my friend. Right, Seojun?" Shane threw his arm around the boy's shoulders.
"Yeah," he stammered, a blush rising over his neck and onto his cheeks.
Jaegil let out a huff, glancing back and forth between the two boys.
A car pulled up to the curb, the windows tinted so black Miyoung couldn't see inside. Seojun Let out a sigh of relief.
"I gotta go," he said to Shane, not bothering to glance at the two bullies who still loomed above him. "See you tomorrow, Shane-ssi." He paused, then added the friendly modifier
"See you." Shane Forced a smile as he rushed to the car.
"You know, I could be your friend, too," Jaegil said with a leer.
"I have enough." The smile slid from Shane's face as he turned away, but Jaegil moved with him.
"You want a smoke?" Jaegil stood above him, a cigarette perched between two fingers. Shane imagined he thought the pose attractive. He'd probably practiced it a dozen times before pulling it out to impress the girls.
A small voice in the back of his head told him there was a way to get rid of Jaegil. To make sure he wouldn't bother her or bully anyone ever again. The hunger gnawing at her had become a constant ache. And it pushed at him, telling her that this boy didn't deserve his life if he was going to use it to cause others pain.
"I asked you a question." Jaegil's tone became insistent, grating at His raw nerves. "It's rude not to answer. Isn't it, Seho?"
"Very rude," the larger boy said. His voice was a mocking baritone.
"I don't smoke." Shane laced his words with venom. SHane didn't wanna do something he would regret in broad daylight. Jaegil didn't take the hint. "You sure you don't want one? I usually don't share."
He shoved a cigarette under his nose so shane smelled the sour tobacco. She snatched it from his hand as he stood. But before he could make another move, Jihoon arrived and pushed Jaegil back.
"Lay off."
"Aw, faggot Jihoon came to rescue his darling."
Shane started forward, but Jihoon stopped him. "I don't think you want the attention kicking his ass will get you."
Jaegil let out a derisive laugh, and Seho took a step closer. "You think he could beat me up? I'd like to see her try."
"Trust me, you really wouldn't," Jihoon said.
"I don't need you to fight my battles," Shane said through gritted teeth.
"Let me handle this," Jihoon said.
"I said to leave it alone!" Shane's shout echoed off the glass of the bus shelter. Heat nestled in his lungs. It mixed with his ever-present hunger and made her chest feel too tight.
"I guess he doesn't like you that much after all, Park Jihoon," Jaegil Added with a chuckle, "After all, who could learn to love a faggot?"
"Oh, shut up!" SHane whirled on Jaegil, and he took a step back at the vehemence in his voice. "I hate people like you, who think you can bully your way into getting everything you want. And these"—he snatched the cigarettes from his hand—"are going to kill you."
He balled the pack in his fist. The heat that pushed his rage spread, pulsing through her until he couldn't think beyond it. Shane swung his fist; Jaegil winced, anticipating the blow. Miyoung pitched the cigarettes away, his wrath fueling him . The crumbled ball of cigarettes and cardboard slammed into the window of the mart beside the bus stop. The force cracked the glass, spiderweb fissures growing f rom the point of impact. Too late, Shane realized he hadn't just thrown it, but used his strength. In public.
For a few tense seconds, it seemed like maybe the window wouldn't break. Then it did, the falling glass mocking Shane with a delicate chorus of tinkling shards.
"Holy fuck!" Jaegil said, his eyes wide as he looked between Shane and the broken window.
Shane's stomach dropped. This wasn't something a normal guycould do —break a solid windowpane with a ball of trash. HIs eyes slid to Jihoon, who stared at the broken window with openmouthed shock. Then the owner of the mart came running out, shouting rapid-fire curses.
"Who did this? I called the police! Who's going to pay for this?"
Hushed whispers sounded from pedestrians who'd stopped to stare. Shane felt the heat of their eyes on him . Burning points into his skin like someone had lit Jaegil's cigarettes and held them to him.
It felt like the world was shattering around him just as the window had. He tasted acidic bile as his fear turned to nausea.
If he was exposed.
Shane felt a tug in his arm. Jihoon was the one pulling him away.
"Run! Get out of here," Jihoon said.
"What?" Shane couldn't understand what he meant. Weren't the police coming? Wasn't he going to get arrested? His identity would be revealed. Loralie would then have to clean up in this mess, Shane's opportunity of getting the crown to be lost forever.
It was his fault, all his fault.
Jaegil and Seho gave shouts of alarm before they took off, the store owner chasing them down the street.
"You have to leave before the police get here."Jihoon pulled him away.
Shane hesitated for a moment, but then as he looked around, he decided it would be best to follow Jihoon's advice.