Saturday: it was half day. Usually, students would spend their time strolling around town in the afternoon. But I, on the other hand, spend it playing games and watching TV at home. But this certain Saturday completely ruined my plans.
I woke up earlier than usual for some unknown reason. I wanted to sleep more, but my body didn't want to. There was also the choice of playing First Fallacy to pass the time, but I wouldn't be able to finish one quest before the tour bus arrives. So I decided to go outside to get some fresh air. As I stepped outside, I was welcomed by Komoku, our house dog.
"Hapu! Hapu!" he barked.
Yes, that was a bark. We don't really know why he barks like that. Perhaps there was something wrong with his throat… It didn't matter to me anyway because he'll soon be turned into an inugami anyway.
Speaking of inugami, our family is believed to have the most. Although I doubt it since I've never seen them. Sometimes, I wonder if supernatural beings really do exist or not; that everyone was hallucinating and I was the only sane person in the whole world. But what about Kinbaku? How come I could see him and everything else was invisible? Was his existence an exception? These thoughts remained in my head all the way to school. I only snapped out to it when Mako hit me on the head.
"You okay, inu?" he asked.
"Y-yeah, why?"
"You've been spacing out ever since you got here.
"Oh, sorry…"
When I came t, I saw myself in the council room, seated on my designated chair. Beside me was Mako, listening to music as usual. Mimi was busy compiling the daily reports, while Suzuna was preoccupied with trimming her nails. Everyone minded their own business. Is this how disciplinary committees are supposed to act?
"Shouldn't we be doing something committee-like?"
"Like what?" Suzuna asked.
I relayed my reply to Mako, "Maybe inspect bags or something?"
She changed the subject by asking, "Is it really that hard for you to talk to girls?
"It's his fear." Mako responded, "His fear prevents him from communication and physical contact with girls."
"But he can talk to Mimi normally! What gives!" Suzuna exclaimed.
"We don't know." He answered, "That's what we're here to-"
"Invasion of privacy." Mimi interrupted.
"What?"
"We can't do bag inspections because it's an invasion of privacy."
That was news to us. It's no wonder students can just bring anything to school. Mako and I were no exceptions. He always brought his music player and I always brought my portable gaming console. Yes, it might be an invasion of privacy, but it would distract the students from their studies. Well, I was one to talk, but still…
"So… what can we do?"
"You can inspect the hallways and look for anyone breaking the school rules." Mimi answered, still preoccupied with the papers.
"Okay then. Mako, wanna come with me?"
"Can't." he replied.
"Why not?"
"'Cuz I can't leave Mimi with this monster." He said while pointing at Suzuna.
"Haah?! Why would I-!"
"Okay then."
"You're just gonna accept that?!"
So I left the room, leaving the exorcist and the demon alone. Okay, that probably wasn't a good idea. As I turned around to go check on them, I accidentally bumped into someone carrying piles of paper.
"Oh, sorry."
Papers flew all over the place. Then it fell slowly, all at the same time. And when they landed on the floor, I saw a blue-haired girl with dark eyes glaring at me in awe. She seemed to be the timid type because she didn't respond when I apologized. She simply ignored me and proceeded to pick up the fallen papers. Of course I helped her because it was partly my fault that they fell. Once we picked them up and stacked them together, she bowed and left.
"H-hey!"
That was rude. Couldn't she manage to thank me properly? Then I suddenly realized:
"…Did I just call out to her?"
Strange. She was a young girl and yet I managed to call out to her. And it was at that moment that Kinbaku appeared beside me.
"What a shame…" he said.
"A shame?"
"If she had responded, it would have been the start of a blooming romance!"
"Romance?"
"But…" he responded, "With your fear of young girls, I doubt it could've worked out."
It wasn't news to me that romance wasn't possible. I had long dropped the idea of falling in love. There was no point in talking about it… unless…
"Does this conversation have something to do with today's offering?"
"Who knows?" he replied.
"So? What is it?"
He covered his mouth and said, "A book…"
That was surprising. I thought for sure he was gonna ask for something ridiculous again. A book was the last thing I'd hear him say.
"Finally… Something normal…"
"An ero book!" he exclaimed.
Well, there went my expectations. I shouldn��t have expected him to change so swiftly.
"And not just any ero book…" he continued, "It should have blondies and big boobs and uncensored-"
"You're just asking for a porn mag!"
His requests got more perverted as time went by. I mean, what would he need it for anyway?
"Do you happen to own one?"
"Unfortunately, I'm not into 3D girls."
Yep, because of my fear, I had given up on real girls. I preferred 2D because they can't physically touch me. Thus, "that" isn't possible.
"It's fine." he said, "because I heard this school hides one of the best!"
"What are you-"
Then he disappeared. Did he really have to leave me hanging? Anyway, I finished patrolling the hallways, so I went back to the council room. And when I got there, instead of seeing Mako and Suzuna fighting, they were listening carefully to Mimi's lecture.
"Oh, hey." Mako greeted.
"What's going on?"
"Apparently, we've been featured in the school newspaper."
"R-really?!"
"Yep!" Suzuna responded, "Turns out the missing panties case was one of the school's seven mysteries. So-"
"And because we solved, we've been featured in the front page!" Mako added.
"Hey!" she then interrupted, "I wasn't done explaining!"
"I explained first, so it's just fair that I finish it!"
Then Mimi cut them off by saying, "When I got this article, I began searching for the other six mysteries."
Wait, so she skipped all the paperwork for that one article? She must be a fan of mysteries and such. More importantly…
"How did you get hold of the article?"
"It was distributed by the library committee a while ago." She answered.
When was that? I would've known if they were distributing it because I patrolled the hallways. Did they pass through me or something? Come to think of it, there was this incident earlier when I bumped into the timid girl. I guess the papers she carried were drafts of the article.
"Anyway…" she continued, "While I was reading about the mysteries in the article, I noticed how most of them violated school rules."
"Indeed. The missing panties violated article 5 section 2." Suzuna responded.
"How do you know that?" Mako asked.
"I read the handbook, of course!" she replied, "I'm not a blond beauty with an empty head, you know!"
"You should've been."
"What was that?!"
Mimi ignored them and continued, "The next mystery is one that violates both school rules and public morals: the hidden ero-book."
And just like that, our next objective was at hand. Who would've thought these series of events would intertwine. All we had to do was find the legendary ero-book, but it was easier said than done…