"Grandma, Why you came outside?" Junea said.
"Yeah Granny, we should be the one come inside your room" Joshua said , smiling sweetly —he is still here, didn't go back to Cebu yet where his company is .
"You okay grandma? You Need anything?" Athena said, smiling sweetly to their gradma.
Their grandma just shook her head and smiled at them.
Though, this animals—his cousins —isn't her blood, she loves them as she love him, Athena and Junea, no doubt about that.
She treated them equally, sometimes he is rhe one who will be Reproach when there's something wrong —even if it's not his fault, it's because of the fact that he is tje eldest among them.
"It's fine.. I'm feeling bored there. Just let me be here, it's last night for Mikaela to be here, maybe she wants to spent good time for Magda and Mona.. She's been close to them, they're good friends now, so I'm just giving her time" Grandma says.
'the heck?' Samuel's dumbfounded.
'shit!'
He keeps on hissing in his mind. Like the heck?, how —How can he not know?!
Maybe that's the thing Mikaela wanted to say a while ago? He wanted to punch his self. How the fuck he didn't give Mikaela a time? How the fuck he didn't give attention to her??
'Hell!' he murmured.
He wanted to punch his self to death, but every time he wanted to talk to her, Tina is always there, making sure that he couldn't.
He's piss at her already. She's acting like a girlfriend who didn't cheat on him year ago. But he— being calm and having a lot of patience, he doesn't want to be rude at anybody — including Tina.
All of them, turned their faces on the kitchen, they were bewildered on the tender voice singing sadly and guitar is played there.
His hand which cupping a glass of water that he is about to drink was hanging on the air as he is listening to the voice—it's a voice of hurting. He can hear pain in it, in every lyrics coming out her mouth.
"I can feel the song!" Joshua
"So sad, I feel like crying!" Athena
"Shit man, im crying!" Junea
"Oh my God, she's in pain, she can feel the song !" Shaina.
Jake —who is sitting beside him—tapped his shoulder. RR did thesame. Joshua too
"Drink the poor water" MN said in soft voice.
He did, he drank it —bottoms up. Suddenly, he felt his throat dried. It's like, he didn't drink half of his life. His heart ached and wanted to get out from his ribcage
'fuck this!' he bowed his head down.. Not wanting anyone to see his pain. To see his suffering.
How can he fix things up right now? He is a fucker, mother fucker among the fuckers! First he let her see him with Tina —kissing him—even if he didn't kiss back, at least Tina's lips touch his'.
Instead of talkingbto her and justify his self, he chose to see her reaction, he chose to know if she will fight for him or not.
He wanted to see her jealous. If she will speak like she used to —with him. But nothing, evwn just of those he wanted —nothing happened.
She's so emotionless.
Second, he just let Tina ordered her like a boss and Mikaela is a servant. Because he knows that she's defiant, she's a fighter she's a naughty girl who can defend herself. She did those to him tho.
But then, she didn't —to Tina, she's quiet. She's obedient — and that's made him more jerk. He didn't defend her nor protect her. He just let Tina bitch in at her.
'Say something, I'm giving up on you
And I will swallow my pride
You're the one that I love
And I'm saying goodbye'
Goodbye. A tear fall in his chicks. "fuck. Fuck!" he clenched his Jaws. Bow his head as he wipe simply his tears on his cheek.
No—just no! Hell, no way in hell he will let her say 'goodbye' to him! Come hell or high water, he will not allow her to bid goodbye to him.
"Chill big bro— fix yourself first. Fix the mess that you're in right now. Talk to Tina —heart to heart, if she will not listen, you can strangle her to death you — aww what the fuck Joshua?!" Athena said in low voice, not till Joshua punch her on her shoulder.
He shook his head on how they're 'helping' him
" We are just here at your back, because we doesn't want to go in your front. Just call and I'll be there, wherever you will go, just call my name and I'll be the— fuck you Geoffrey!" its Joshua.
"That's a song bitch! What's the title of that song Shaina?" Geoffrey said, frowning as he is trying to remember the song.
"Don't know" Shaina said simply.
"I'll be there, idiot!" it's MN.
He stayed looking down, and then he look up when his grandma speak.
"When you love, you feel pain Samuel, learn how to balance the two feelings , learn how to let your pride be filled up with love. Learn how to trust. Learn how to fight for that person. It's not easy to love. But if that love can reciprocate the other one, then the two love can pass the struggles and hindrances coming whatever it is.
Fight for it, whatever is in your heart mi hijo, I know what happened to you and Tina. I just don't want to talk—to meddle. But now, I want to talk to her since she came back like nothing happened. It's all over. It's time to face your self, go for your heart. I like Mika mi hijo. . Fight for her. Love her. Cherish her.
Sometimes, God is just giving us exploratory—to know how we can handle life. On till when we can make it. But He will not give us a test that he knows we can't afford. And he will not give a person for you to love if he knew that person is not worth fighting for. And if he knew if that person is not worth for your love.
Because love is a journey, starting at forever and ending at never"
All of them is just looking at their grandma. She's not talking a lot—just now. And all of them went silent and just— some jaw dropped, some are glaring at gradma— flatly.
Those who doesn't believe in love, is just giving their grandma a deadpan look. Like ' what the heck in this world you're saying grandma' kind of look.
He cleared his throat.
"Why do you think I stayed with your grandpa, even when I learned that he has a lot of children —in different places and different woman?"
No one dared to answer. Just blinking, some are took and look at their phone—in fastest way they could, just not to be oblige to answer the old woman.
He shook his head, murmured ' still young and idiot'.
" It's because, I love him—I love my family, and your grandfather is not that cheater, they're already been here in this world—your fathers when we met, and he chose to marry me, not because I'm rich but because he love me. And your fathers —are like my sons, I love them the way a mother could feel. "— she glance for the rest aside from him, Junea and Athena, one by one.
He's the eldest, even if the father of this lunatics surrounding him is more older than his father just because his uncles are too picky and married by the age where they couldn't do anymore baby aside from this animals in his house.
" Acceptance and forgiveness —trust and respect, that's the main recipe for love—Samuel"
'huh?' why just me? ' he wanted to speak it out but he didn't.
Someone snorted and their grandma chuckled
"Samuel, you're already 30, I need to see your kids before I will closed my eyes forever"
He cleared his throat and sit errect.
"He's still young granny" says Junea.
"Young? At the age of 30—he's already too old for making his woman jealous — and not succeeded" grandma said and giggled.
"Burn!"
"Toasted!"
"Roasted!"
"Grilled!"
"Fuck! I'm so glad —I'm still young!"
He wanted to raise his middle finger but he couldn't just because he's afraid from their grandma.
"Go, talk to her mi hijo, don't be too dumb to just let her go just like that—be a man, once in your life, before you will lose your shit!" says grandma.
He glared at her, jaw drop as he couldn't believe what just she said
"Oh hell! Tell him grandma, tell him —get the fuck out in here and go to her—aww! What??"! " Adrian shouted at Shaina — who kick Adrian in his waist as MN is in between of them.
And MN is just chuckling, raised his thumb to Shaina and winked at her.
" Talk—what the fuck are you doing? Go —now that your unwanted visitor is not around!" Shaina yelled.
He gave her the 'dont shout, I'm not deaf' kind of look but she showed her middle finger—to the way that their grandma couldn't take a peek.
He stood up, walk straight to the kitchen.
" Goodluck, just scream if something bad happen —my hospital is waiting for you!" Thadeius said.
"Pendejo!" he shouted back.
'help me with this Lord' murmured those word as he walks through the kitchen, and his heart ached for the scenery that he saw.
Mikaela, leaning on the guitar —sobbing.
'God, what have I done?'