Tony was waiting for me right out side the door.
"I heard your voice... you sounded sad... but you locked me out... I couldn't here the words you was saying... but I'm here for you."
shit I don't know what to say, he looks worried about me.
"geez... creeper... setting out side the rest room door.. "
it's nice that he cares but if I wanted to talk to him I would have. I'm not the kind of person who puts all my problems on someone else.
"wow just trying to be nice." he is frustrated. I should have responded better.
"sorry" what do I do? " um want to webflex and chill with me? I heard they have a new series the Satan show?"
"sure. What do you mean by chilling? " he said playfully. I love how fast he gets happy. I love making him smile.
We are binging Satan for about an hour. I grabbed soda and he got pop corn.
I'm leaning against him. He is smiling I can feel it as his face leans on my head. His arm is around me.
Something about this is wonderful. It's heard to put my finger on it but the more I think about us together the more excited I get.
I wander if he feels the same.
I rub his thigh slowly. Feeling his soft shorts, the warmth of his leg. I press slightly felling the firmness of his muscles. It must be nice to be athletic. I wonder if he noticed what I'm doing he hasn't said anything or moved much. I slowly rub from his knee moving towards his waist. My hand stops when I feel him look down at me.
"sorry" I say as soon as I notice him notice me.
"Do I have butter on my forehead?"
what the fuck kind of question is that? Well we are eating popcorn. I look up at his face his soft lips and his amazing eyes. Before my eyes make it to his forehead he grabs me putting me on his lap. He holds me close kissing me. I'm stiff at first. I wasn't expecting that. He looks me in the eye before kissing me again.
"Tony, I love your eyes."
"really why?" he said closing his eyes.
"I can't explain it they are amazing. There a beautiful green. I get all excited every time you look at me like that."
"mmm what will you do to get my eyes open?" he's so playful tonight. Still setting there with his eyes closed. He is good at making me smile.
"I don't know" I laugh.
"well try something and see if it works." he smiles.
"like this?" I try to tickle him.
"nope"
"what about this?" I take a deep breath. I stand up and take off my top. I get back on his lap. One leg on both sides, I rub my hands up his chest and neck I hold his head while kissing him deeply. although he is smiling he hasn't opened his eyes yet. I continue kissing him till he moves his hands. His hands move slowly up the legs of my baggie but thin pajamas.
As soon as his fingers touch my skin his eyes open.
I pause just long enough to say. "there they are"
he picks me up laying me on his bed.
We kiss for awhile.
The two of us topless.
His body is amazing. I admire his body with both my eyes and to my hands.
"Tony do you like your body?"
"sigh, Not always, but I do whenever you look at it like that"
he smiles at me looking at my face. he kisses my head and lays next to me. I finally feel comfortable with him being topless.
"So what's on your mind James?" he said he lays on his side rubbing his fingers up the middle of my body.
"Why would you ever not like your body it's incredible?"
"First thank you that." he takes his hand back and sighs. "ok so I use to hate my skin. My hair and even my eyes."
"Why?" I really want to know.
"I have had a really happy life for the most part. We never had to get government help for food or health care. Both my parents are doctors, so I've never went without." sigh.. " the first time I thought something was wrong with me was at a party.. I was about 8, I wished I was white, like my mom. Because my dad was gone a lot and kids didn't believe she was my mom. Because we didn't look alike." ..."But my dad is amazing and I'm proud of him." ... "still bothers me when people tell me to go home to my country. However I'm no longer bothered by my appearance but instead their ignorance."
"That's good that it doesn't bother you anymore, because I find you to be very attractive."
"yeah I know... why didn't you say something sooner? You know about liking ... my body? " he asks.
" well... don't get mad... but I was totally checking you out day one... even though you told me not to. I thought you were unattended to me. I didn't see the point... There was still a couple times you got me all flustered being close to you." I say kissing him.
"yeah sorry about that... It took me a while to get over the penis, that you don't even have... Then everytime I would get all flustered.. I ran away... I was trying to figure out how to confess to a guy. I'm not even good with the lady's so.."
" you don't seem so bad with the lady's I think for like ten days you were bringing a new one to the door each night. I'm sure they would have fallowed you in if you asked."
"that's not the point. All they wanted was a quick fuck." ... "I meant nothing to them. They never even asked my name."
"wow girls are evil." I laugh.
"yeah they can be... Look I know what this is about. Your mom didn't respond the way you had hoped... That's ok. you don't have to dress like a girl if you don't want to. You don't have to be a man just because you like manly things. Look you make a cute boy, and a sexy woman, but more importantly you are smart, funny, down to earth, your a good person regardless of gender and you mom sees it too even if she is to scared to say it."... he looks at me for a minute before he continues. "So be happy, James and don't worry about it. ok? "
I smile ... He makes me feel good about myself.
"ok I'll try."
That night for the first time we did more then shear a bed. It was wonderful... A night I'll never forget.