"HEY! I finally cut the..." *Crash Crack* As Aki walked inside the house, ready to demand a higher tipe of coin as payment, he directly got hit by a glass cup in the head, the likes of really fancy people use in movies, and broke his neck. *Crack* "Bad timing? Someone naked?" He asked, completly calm despite the abuse and the falling glass shards dropping from his face.
"That was unintentional." Said a clearly depressed voice he did not reconise, with almost no guilt on it.
"But can i open my eyes?" He asked even before the retina regenerated.
"It wouldn't be a problem even if i was actually naked." She clearly shrugged.
"Then i'd definetly not want to look. We're what, two or three doors away from actual hell?" He said, already turning to leave and wait till this person left. He had a lot of practice with that.
"Oh, come here boy, it's not like i'm going to bite you."
"There's worse to be done. Who are you anyway, my grandgranma?"
"Have some respect boy, I'm a goddess too, i could have your soul flagelated for this insult."
"I'm a chosen. Bitch, get on the line." He rolled his eyes and finally looked back to gauge who he was dealing with. 'Blonde, golden eyes, perfect skin and relatively short, probably Hera or someone trying to look inconspicuous and failing misserably.' He summarized.
"In that case, boy, go get me a martiny." She ordered. 'Hera, definetly Hera.'
"Double or triple? Lemon or soda?" He replied dutifully. He couldn't actually ignore a god's quest, but she'd pay him for it. Literally.
"It's supposed to be lemons or olives idiot, and i want both." She rolled her eyes and sent him away. He imediatly took out a 'martiny' out of his storage ring and slightly removed the heat from it, having the drink quickly reach a state where it the sweat on the glass turned into small ice particules and handed it to her after circling the glass rim with lime peel and dropping the olive.
"I really don't know much about drinks besides some basic ones, so i only have Pina collada as another composite, but there should be some five liters of rum, gin, champagne and wine, plus some beer cans still in my inventory." He informed, before she could ask for something else.
"Why? Even i don't carry that much alcohol around." Said the alcoholic, acepting the drink.
"Because it is cool and cheap to be able to just summon licor, duh." He said, as if it was obvious. Just in the time he'd rolled his eyes though, she'd already drank the shot.
"For a mortal, you pass. Gime that gin." She demanded with a hand.
"Pay up and i will." He remenbered her, who gronaed and took a hand to her bra, which she aparently used below the elaborate white toga with golden marking, taking a golden coin out, which he imediatly took from her hands while summoning two of the promiced bottles.
Nevermind he didn't know what it was, if it was on her bra because of the reasons he thought it was, and she further showed him correct by drinking the first bottle in large gulps, than he'd be getting a lot of benefits out of the coin no matter how uselles she thought it was.
"You don't need to get so excited over my cleavege, you know?" She said between gulps.
"Yeah, sure, and if Hades was standing behind you without those heavy robes you'd not turn around to get some eye candy." He retorted, not dismissing the fact that she did, in fact, have a nice body. It was more of a fact than an observation or flatery realy, Aki was too self concious to consider it.
"Mortals still remenber that?" Said seriously asked, making a face.
"That you were the one to take care of his wounds when he was down, that you'd have married him if he had the balls to snatch you from zeus way back then, that you two slept together countless times and you lied to yourself saying it doesn't count because he'd not be able to..."
"Ok, stop, that's enough." She said, much more serious than before.
"We did meet by you throwing glassware on my face for no reason, you should expect that much." He pointed out. "Besides, it's not like you're exactly like the jealous bitch that made so many mistakes because of jealosy, loliness and frustation as the one depicted in human history. No sarcasm intended. You're what, mother of four or five? I can respect the dedication and stregth you have even outside your godhood, it's your problem if you can't do that as well." He calmly said, patted her on the shoulder and passed through.
A bit away from the scene.
"That went completly diferent from what i espected, but i guess he's got an idea for that coin or something." Said the god of hell, confused how his plan had ended so badly in the last stretch.
"You expected than to fuck, didn't you?" Smirked his wife, who had a much higher EQ when dealing with actual people.
"I mean, yeah. He wants more magic so giving Hera a hand with something would kill three birds with one stone." He shrugged.
"You do notice she could Yang him, right?" She giggled a bit while seeing her husband pass through all the motions processing what she ment.
"Would he... how do you..." His jaw was hanging, he hadn't really thought of that.
"It's fine boo, you're getting better at this, take your time." She patted the much taller man's shoulder.
*****
"But you are sure there is no such thing as the Foundation around, right?" He asked, remenbering another supposed fault of Zeus that led to Hera destroying an art troupe in the process of vengeance.
"Yes, i am sure, any of these fucking creatures you keep describing would be great ingredients for some things and cultivators simply would not let then leave their sight. Except maybe the ones that cause cognito razards, but you get what i mean." Explained Melissa, who was already preparing to sleep when Aki barged into her room with worry in his face.
"Yeah, sorry, just a small panic episode when i remenbered some entries i hadn't been thinking about in a while." He sighed and went out, having already rested while in hell.
*****
On the 'third' day of Aki being a pawn stage cultivator.
"What a coincidence Liutenent, you also get your groceries around here?" He asked with a smile.
"Drop the knife." She said, ready to shoot.
"Oh this? It's nothing, can't even cut skin." He demonstrated on his own wrist, leaving merely a white mark. "Just a tool to scare off the dangerous tipes." She'd lowered the muzzle and locked the safety again before putting it back on the holster. "Did you have something you wish to discuss?" He smiled harder at her cold face.
"I saw you turning around a dark alley and thought we could talk over some coffee." Said the woman-like doll.
"Not unless you want to come back to the place i'm crashing, because i hardly trust any store with my coffee and i don't want to walk too much to get it. My place is safe, sound proof and saturday worthy, what do you say?" He asked in a more normal tone. Dealing with this woman was a stresfull endeavor for him.
"The whore house? I was unaware it possesed such acomodations, but they are fitting." She nodded and followed him deeper into the small maze of turns in silence. Getting there, the employess treated him with respect and some mirth, but they all looked strangely at the her. People with high chances of being 'fausely' acussed knew their way around the workings of the police. It'd be like not knowing about Jin Gordon if you lived in Gothan and he was a hot russian that constantly appeared on TV.
"Now, i suppose you would like to take off your jacket?" He said, plainly showing the eight filled pockets specially made to hold actual knifes on his. "Just leave it here. Want anything to drink? Roy! Make me a virgin pina colada and a death wish, please?" He shouted over to the man at the bar, who simply nodded and turned to the guest before going to the kitchen.
"Coffee please." She said, copying the small nuance.
"Any cameras or mics you want to plant? They won't work inside my room, no screams leave those walls. Mostly because of the youtube videos i watch on max volume and some heavy rock i listen to while writing." He said, as if that made sense or was entirely a lie made for this kind of exchange.
"Didn't bring any. I'd still arest you for assalting or harassing an officer though."
"I don't beat woman liutenant. It is rare for me to find one around, but i would be hard pressed to satisfy the more submisive ones in bed." He shrugged.
"So you don't consider all females as women? Is that what you tell yourself when you beat one?" She asked, seemly curious while waiting for the coffee.
"Of course not, enemies are enemies. I don't have time to tell if it is male or female unless i need to get into psycological warfare with then, and by then it simply wouldn't matter what i think about it." He pointed out seriously. His philosophy and thoughts were what made him the version of himself that he currently was after all, so they were important. "Oooh, coffee." But so was drinking coffee in an ass chilling weather. "Letsu go!" He said, sipping the black susbstance in the plain white cup while holding the pineaple drink oin the other and opening his room with the shoulders. He had a lot of practice after all.
Finishing the supper bitter brew, Aki didn't hold back in slowly sipping the sweet one.
"What did you want to talk about?" He asked, his mouth still on the straw.
"I wanted to ask your opinion on the explosion of your apartment, off the record." She asked, back to the wall while he sat on the bed.
"Oh, it was me. Don't get me wrong, there was someone trying to kill me, it's just that I changed the bomb for one I made myself so I could explode their assassin as well as gather attention." He explained calmly. Just because they couldn't prove it doesn't mean they couldn't guess he was related or even guilty of the incident.
"The asian gang that seems to have suddenly gained a lot of power and influence." He nodded to her badly formed question. "Anything you could tell me about them?"
"They are a cover for some powerful people. The Italians probably had their support previously but made a mistake and died. I'd wager some cultivators are racist, because no one appears to have even come near the geto boys of our lovely town before trying to infiltrate them with more mundane methods." He ranted.
"Cultivators? Never heard of them."
"Of course you didn't, you're new and from a normal family. The guy that cuffed me seemed to know better, but he also seemed to have had better days." He pointed out.
"And why would he not tell me about such a group. Besides the obvious dislike for my person."
"First, it's more of a community for people with certain abilities. Second, because it sounds like utter bullshit when you explain it but can't prove it." He said, using a combination of affinities to make her gun fly to his hand. He then proceeded to shoot his knees, arms and forehead, no damage done to him. "You believe in magic now? Want me to do some other trick?" He asked, taking the rest of the ammo on the gun before throwing it at her, who caught it easily.
"Can I obtain this kind of power?" She asked, a glint of something in her eyes.
"Of course. Even if you don't have any talent at all you can just fuck someone who has and get some affinity depending on the partner." He sweetly smiled at her. "Thing is, you also need a proper manual for these things even if your talent is good. What do you say you work with me? I may be strong, but I'm not a lieutenant, and the opposite applies to you. Partners?" He offered, his hand extended, happy to try and reel her in this unexpected chance.