Not expecting such words, Xue Mo looked at Lu Yao weirdly and said: "What do you mean, why? We are friends, partners, and most of all, we are cultivators. Although we aren't for now, we will be one soon.
Besides, this is my first time putting such trust in someone, and even though I trust you, I still added that function to destroy any thoughts of you betraying me for it.
Are you dense or stupid? If you haven't noticed for the last two years though I seemed amicable and friendly, I tested you repeatedly while keeping my guard up against you. But I had seen that you never had thoughts about betraying me. Although it seemed to me like there is something you are hiding, this is your business.
Even if we seem like a family nowadays, we still haven't talked about ourselves, our real selves, at least. And I understand that we might be different, but that is how everyone is.
If there weren't differences in the world, all humans would be trash, and I would have killed all the humans in the Divine Hell Universe; however because I know that no one is the same, that I never did such a thing. I understood that even when my emotions were dull, and now that they seem to have been activated, I understand it more than ever." Xue Mo paused as he listened to his own words and thought, 'Did I really say all that?'
This was his first time talking this long but, it wasn't the long speech or anything like that which made him ask this, but the words and the meaning behind them. Xue Mo wasn't someone who had emotions before, and when he had them, he felt that they were hard to express. But now, when he talked to Lu Yao about his true feelings, Xue Mo felt much better as if a weight had been lifted on his heart, and he felt that he had more to say, so he was about to continue, but Lu Yao started talking, making him stop.
"I cannot tell you much for now, and it's not because I don't trust you. I trust you, Xue Mo, more than anyone. Because I trust you, I won't abuse your trust and lay my problems on you. Even if we are partners, no, It's because we are partners that I don't want to burden you with my problems." Lu Yao said with so much conviction that she almost praised herself for pulling this off.
On the other hand, Xue Mo looked at Lu Yao as if she was dumb, flicked her forehead, and said: "Do you know what a partner is? I mean obviously, you should. With your age and how you proposed it when we met, but looking at you now, I feel you don't, so let me tell you.
A PARTNER is someone who you share stuff with. A PARTNER is someone who you trust and have the back of. But, you didn't know that, and I am not complaining, for there are secrets that you don't about me, and I am too not comfortable sharing them.
Nevertheless, I want you to know that I will eventually tell you these secrets, even if not now, but someday I will trust you enough and open up. I hope you do the same."
Xue Mo felt as if he was weird. There was never a time in his life where he talked this way, and even if he was changing over these two years, he shouldn't have changed this much. However, when he spoke to Lu Yao, he felt comfortable sharing and talking about them.
Seeing that the atmosphere already became like this, he shared something, "This might seem like a confession, but a cold and detached person might not be able to repeat this. I am a coward, someone who wouldn't mind killing everything if it helped me. But this isn't why I am a coward; it's because I would bench anything aside if it meant avoiding something, just like I did to my feelings when I discovered them." Xue Mo looked deeply at Lu Yao as he said this. "I disregarded them, threw them aside, and tried to ignore them. But even after spending these two years trying to suppress them, the emotions I have so painstakingly discarded had blossomed. I don't know how I feel about you, but I had to say this. I appreciate you and your company, if not for you I know I would still be the same person I always was, and even though that person is me at the same time, it's not. You have helped me discover a side to me I never knew existed, and I thank you for that, though I could never truly put into words how I feel, I want you to know that I feel for you."
His words dazed Lu Yao. She had been with Xue Mo for almost two years now, and although they had similarities, they also had differences. And one of these differences was that although she didn't know how to express her feelings, she knew what they were and how they felt; however, Xue Mo didn't.
So, for him to tell her all this suddenly, she felt weird. However deep inside, her heart started beating fast as a warm feeling spread in her while also putting a happy smile spread on her face.
Lu Yao was about to talk when Xue Mo interrupted her. "I didn't give you Infinite Darkness because I was trying to tempt you or something, it's because we are partners and we agreed to stay together for a long time, maybe even never separate, that is why only so don't misunderstand."
Seeing how Xue Mo was trying to justify stuff with a cool face while deep inside, he was panicking. Lu Yao laughed inwardly. "Don't worry, I know. I will tell you in time what is happening and what happened, but for now, let me tell you this. I feel that we have surpassed the fundamental partnership that we made, but because we are unfriendly people who hadn't experienced emotions for a long time, we didn't notice. But, now listening to you, I realized that I-I... I think I like you as more than a partner. I don't want you to say anything in response now.
I just wanted to say this. Oof, I feel better now." She felt the atmosphere get awkward, but she continued, "You are the first person after my mother's death who could find a place in my cold closed out heart. Although the way you burrowed inside was unexpected, I enjoy the feeling and the way I am with you. For now, I don't want to think about this, and I know you feel the same, so I think we should leave this for later.
Nevertheless, I will tell you about me and my past, eventually."
After they talked and laid some of their feelings out, they removed the runes that Lu Yao put up as the atmosphere was awkward and a little stifling as they weren't used to talking about these things, especially with each other.
Even though they felt that way, Xue Mo and Lu Yao stayed near each other trying to busy themselves with something. The best thing to do was practicing the Mana manipulation method that they created using Infinite Darkness.
This didn't escape Dio's eyes. He saw that Xue Mo was doing something for the first time since they boarded the carriage and that something was Mana control. Although from what he noticed, it was the same method he was teaching, but in Xue Mo's hands, it felt more archaic and powerful.
Though he didn't pay him much attention, thinking it's the same method just that his admiration for Xue Mo's talent made him think it's different.