A/N: In case anyone was wondering ... I changed her color from pink to black.
In a small cave in the middle of a big, big forest was a shrine.
The cave's entrance had long been sealed shut by a big stone, this was evident through the amount of forestry covering the stone, it had become one with the forest around it.
The cave held only one purpose and that was to conceal a shrine beautiful like no other, worthy of the goddess within.
Beautiful drawings adorned the shrine's walls.
They depicted something significant, something old and ancient. They showed history.
From when the Sage of Six Paths, soon to be Father of Beasts and his brother sealed their own mother, the Rabbit Goddess, on the moon.
When a clan of beautiful women arrived on this planet. They had abilities to charm any human and to create illusions that even some of the strongest masters couldn't escape. That was their kekkei genkai, as the people here would call it.
For a long time, they seemed to have roamed the elemental nations … and at some point, the Sage and a woman fell in love.
The woman seemed to have been the leader of the foxes, their matriarch.
Soon, a child was born. A little fox different from all others.
Her fur was an abyssal black. And her eyes, they weren't normal. She was born with her father's eyes, he knew that, he felt it. However, they had no way to actually see them.
The little fox had slept, ever since she was born, she had slept.
She slept for hundreds of years, someday outliving her parents. Ever since that one day, she had not once awoken, and her appearance had not changed. Not once had her body twitched. Not once did the little fox feed on anything.
Something was missing, that, her already deceased parents had realized at some point.
They asked the Kitsune Clan to look after the child. And they did. The child may have been a mutated form of what their clan originally was (as there never was a purely black fox before), but they would care for the child of their former matriarch.
They looked after her and as time passed, she was known as the "Sleeping Fox Goddess". Every new generation of foxes tended to the black fox, protecting her from harm.
Again, she outlived those that cared for her. Her clan, her worshippers, had faded in the winds of time as every force eventually did.
The only thing left of their culture was the shrine. That golden shrine. Even now, it held not a speck of dust.
The years passed. Villages were created. Wars raged across the world. Yet, the small fox still did not wake up. Knowledge about her, her mother and their clans eventually faded from the elemental nations.
She was forgotten. Only Kurama, the one her father had created in the Kitsune Clan's memory, still knew of her. And he waited for her, he was asked to protect his father's child after all. Essentially, she was his sister, though, an older sister. She was the oldest being that was truly living. He would, however, do everything in his power to protect her.
…
[In Another World]
"Sigh … it's over soon." I say, my voice cracking and radiating relief and sadness at the same time.
Tears flowed down my face as I held my bleeding wrist.
It hurts less when you hold your slit wrist into hot water, they were right. I think, while doing exactly that.
The water of the bathtub was slowly turning red, my body soon not visible anymore.
Thank god. I hate this body.
I wonder just who decided that I would be born in the body of a male?
Because that one person was the one that is responsible for everything. I felt anger rise from within me, but it soon disappeared again, like it always did.
I sigh. No matter, it's okay now. It's fine now. Soon, it'll be over. My inevitable end always calmed me down whenever something bothered me.
All those people … they call me by that name … and they tell me to "man up" and to "grow up" … who are they talking to? I do not know anyone by the name ******. Do they actually think this is just a phase? They must be stupid.
Do they not know how much it hurts me every time they associate me with anything male? Do they know how much I would have liked being female? To wear cute clothes? To talk to other girls about boys and such? Ah … how could they know. I'm such an expert at hiding it after all. That's all I know. To hide my pain. And even if someone noticed, they are clearly not caring about me enough to do anything about it.
Maybe they are waiting for me to talk? No. That can't be it.
In the end, I'm all alone after all. Actually, this is better. It makes it easier to depart from this shithole of a planet.
In my last moments, anger filled my entire being. It was the same anger that I had reasoned away because it was simply not the world's fault.
It was my own fault for being too weak to live through the world's challenges. Others were also born in bodies they hated, yet, they made do. They perhaps even changed.
Why could I not change? It always bothered me, but alas, it doesn't matter anymore.
It's over now, or so it should have been.
…
Where am I? I think, while slowly opening my eyes and raising my head. Gosh, it's dark.
My eyes took a bit of time to adjust, but I figured that once they did, I would be able to see perfectly even in this darkness. Weird.
Where is this? This feels … different. Something is different. I should be dead … perhaps this is the afterlife?
The anger that clouded my mind in the last moments of my past life was gone.
What remained, was curiosity at my new situation.
Was this better? Was this better than my earlier life?
Was the afterlife worth my time? Was this even the afterlife?
Anyway, I decided to sit up first, only to fall again.
It was only now that I looked down at myself, that I noticed that my entire form had changed.
I was not human anymore, instead, I was a small fox?
Black? Not too bad, I would've liked a color like white or so more though. White foxes are cool. And-
My thoughts froze as I finally turned my head around enough to see my tail … or rather, tails.
N-Nine tails?!
My eyes widened in shock. But soon, I laughed … or whatever sound foxes did whenever they were happy or excited.
Nine tails … I'm a nine-tailed fox! This is wonderful! Finally, I'm not in that disgusting body anymore! This feels liberating. I really wouldn't have minded if I had been a fox in the first place! I never really asked to be a human anyway …
I soon tried standing up again. It took me some time to properly balance my four, small legs.
At some point, with my four paws steady on the ground, I decided to take my first step.
Actually, my body seemed to have been lying on a big red cushion before I woke up, I noticed that when I fell down from it.
It took me some time to be able to properly place one foot in front of the other. I nearly fell a few more times, but I managed to do it after some time.
Though I still couldn't run yet of course. That would still take some more practice.
My eyes had adjusted to darkness and I decided to observe my surroundings first.
These drawings on the walls are beautiful~.
I looked around.
They seem to be telling a story, don't they? Some stuff seems familiar … especially that important-looking old man … didn't I see him somewhere before? I could swear that I- … Yes. In my former life. This is the Sage of Six Paths, is he not?
I stared at the picture in bewilderment. My memories of my past life seemed hazy. I had been able to remember everything the moment before, but as soon as I consciously tried to remember things …
Especially when I tried thinking about my own former self, I could not remember much anymore. I know that I enjoyed reading anything that contained fantasy … stuff that helped me escape reality in that horrible world.
And I also still know that I died by suicide.
I sighed. That's about all though …
I looked at the Sage of Six Paths one more time before searching for an exit.
No matter, if I can't remember then it should not have been anything too important anyway.
…
A/N: Another Naruto fanfic. This time, it's a bit different. I hope the first chapter was interesting. There are some depression and dysphoria thoughts in here … but, that's what bothers me on a nearly daily basis, so I want to incorporate it into my stories.
This is, kind of, a self-insert story. I write this and my other novel for me be able to dream of different life's. Life's in which I may be able to become happy.
My other novel has lots of problems in my eyes, which kind of eats away at my motivation to continue it. I'm not nearly experienced enough as an author to write a story that has no plot holes or anything, but I still want to write things that make me happy, so I'll do just that by starting another novel. I will, however, continue my others story. Naru has found her way into my heart after all :3