After few days of Reiki Attunement
It's been a week since I got my reiki attunement. The dream that I had after my attunement has changed my mind.
I asked my Reiki Teacher about my dream. To my surprise, it was a very special dream. The Reiki Master told me that my guides and the positive energies came to meet me after the success of attunement.
The teacher recommended me a meditation to do which will help me to meet my guides and energies.
I have been doing this meditation and I can feel something rising in me.
I am being more aware of myself and energies around me. Few days back my best friend introduced me to her new friend and I felt so negative energies coming from that girl.
I warned my friend to stay away from that girl. She could mislead her in her studies.
Today my friend called me and said that girl just wanted to take advantage of her knowledge and she just broke her friendship with that girl.
Well this revelation is making me wonder if I am developing some sort of powers or something like that.
I am getting ready to meet my school friends after a long time. It's a get-together party. It's been like 5 years that we haven't met each other.
I am supposed to be excited for this party right? But it's different. I am feeling like not going anywhere. I used to be a girl who likes to socialize but now I feel like I am changing every minute.
Is it because of my attunement or the nightmare that I had?
All these thoughts are overwhelming me and I feel like I am not able to control them.
A strange thing is also happening today with me. I am keep seeing the words, "Death & Rebirth."
These words are popping up everywhere out of the blue. I wonder if this means something to me.
I called my friend that I can't come to the party because of fever.
"Damn I am getting good at making excuses." Well my friend is too angry with me and threatening me to not to meet ever. Usually I am a cool person but today the way she is reacting is making me angry too. It feels like a tigress is about to take over my cool part of the personality and going to pounce over my friend.
I take some deep breaths to calm the energy flow and eventually I calm down my friend as well. She finally accepted my excuse and now I am getting back to my comfortable clothes.
I am sitting on the floor and preparing my altar to do some meditation.
I am getting the grasp of meditation finally. Now it doesn't feel that hard to concentrate as it used to be.
As I close my eyes and start focusing on my breathing, I see a cliff and I am standing on this cliff. There is a sign board written as "Death & Rebirth. "
These words again! I knew it I am not seeing them for no reason. And by the way what the hell am I doing on such a high cliff? As I look down the cliff there is a big river flowing with great intensity.
Oh my God, I take a step back reflexively as I am afraid of heights. But there is no more space to get down of the cliff. What should I do?
As my mind is racing to find a solution of this problem suddenly I remember.
How stupid I am I can call upon Reiki energy to help me with this situation.
I am laughing on myself nervously. I call upon the universal energy. As I do this, a beautiful golden-white light start coming from the sky.
This light is so pure that I can't take my eyes off of this.
The light is floating around my body and going down to the cliff and flowing forward with the river.
This scene is so enchanting that I have forgotten about the fear I was having because of height.
My body is getting lighter. I am feeling like I can float in the air with this energy.
Now I realized it. The more I was trying to control these energies and my fears, the more they were controlling me.
As I have started to surrender myself to the energies, I am overcoming my fears. These energies and fears are not controlling me anymore.
This moment of pure bliss is making me sway in rhythm of this golden energy. As I close my eyes, my arms opens up intuitively as if I am open to accept what's coming next.
A sweet voice rings in my mind, "take a leap of faith and trust us. Nothing will happen."
The voice is so soothing and warm that I feel like I can trust this with all my heart.
The moment I heard that voice, I let myself flow with the energy and I take a jump from the cliff with my hands open wide.
But it feels like I am falling down in the slow motion and a slideshow of all the moments from my life where I was afraid is playing around me.
It's magnificent. This slideshow is giving me the chance to analyze my reactions and actions that I took in the past.
*Splash*
My moment of bliss suddenly ends as I hit the water with force. But why I am drowning in the water.
They said nothing will happen to me and now I am struggling for breath.
Why?? I trusted their guidance and now something totally opposite is happening with me.
It's dark in the water and I am not able to see anything. Suddenly a white light cover the whole river. It's the light of the full moon. Wolfs are howling. It's scary as I have never heard wolfs howling.
This white light is illuminating the water and it's easier to see now.
Something is dancing in front of me. It's the same golden light which was around me on the cliff.
This light has a voice of it's own this time. It's telling me to look beyond the illusion.
What does that even mean? I am drowning here and this light is telling me it's an illusion.
The voice is telling me to let go of my fear, stop struggling against water and embrace this situation as it is.
I don't know how to follow this advice but this is the only option that I have right now.
I am not moving my body to get out of the water anymore.
As I stop struggling against water, my body is rising itself.
It's amazing. My trust and courage is getting back and I am floating above the water now.
Finally!! I am out of the water.
But something different happen, there is no water, no river anymore. I am not floating on water instead I am lying down on the plane ground. Does that mean it was really an illusion. I was not drowning at all.
Suddenly everything is getting blur and I am back in my room as I open my eyes.
Wow! what a strange experience it was. But today I am happy that even I was so afraid during my vision, I didn't open my eyes and finished the meditation process. Usually I break the connection because of the fear.
It feels like my limits are expanding. I am having this constant feeling that I am not the old me anymore.
I get it now why I was kept seeing "Death & Rebirth " everywhere.
It was a sign for me, telling me what's going to happen. Those words were for me.
Now I know I am not the old me because the old me who was selfish, fearful and naive is dead and I rebirth as this powerful being.