Evelyn woke up the next morning from a restful sleep. The sun was flowing into the room in steady streams of light.
Coffee wasn't in the room, but she could hear his paws on the floors in the apartment. Garfield was still curled up beside her. She gently stroked his fur and he purred in his sleep. She smiled, she could get used to this.
She remembered her conversation with Jinhai last night. He told her that he was there, that he had not completely disappeared from her life. But was she supposed to believe that?
She wanted to trust him so much. Jinhai was the one who had always looked out for her. When they were kids he always managed to take care of her.
He would cheer her up when she was down. He would advise her on what to do when she was confused. More than once he had dropped everything to go looking for her when she was lost, and got in trouble for it.
Jinhai was the one who had held her and stayed by her side the first few weeks after her mom passed away. She had acted brave in front of her family but he had let her completely fall apart around him.
There it was, the fact that he had always been there when she had fallen apart. That's why it bothered her that he wasn't around. Shawn had been there for her ups and downs but it hadn't been the same.
Shawn had made her laugh but Jinhai made her face her problems and helped her to overcome them. He made sure there wouldn't be shadows lingering. He had always found a way to help her understand her problems.
She needed that when she had gone through her trials and tribulations. But it was more than that. He always managed to make her feel happier although that might have been her little crush that made her particularly happy when she was around him.
Evelyn glanced at the clock and saw that she still had five minutes before her alarm would ring. She got up to go to the bathroom to splash cold water on her face to wake herself up a bit.
Evelyn then went to go ground coffee beans for her coffee that morning. She preferred to grind the beans herself because she always thought the coffee tasted better when she put in more work for it.
Her phone's alarm rang at 5:30. After brewing the coffee and finishing the first cup it wasn't even 6 o'clock yet. It was time to take Coffee for a walk. She put him on his leash and made sure the handle held trash bags.
After ensuring that there was enough coffee for her second cup, she took Coffee and headed out the door. She greeted the attendant at the desk, brightly before stepping outside.
It was windier than she thought it would be this morning. Evelyn wish she wore a thicker sweater, but she would warm up soon enough.
It had been a long time since Evelyn had a dog. Her mother had adopted a Shibu Inu two years before she had passed away. Her mother named her, Cherry Blossom. It was named after her mother's favorite flower.
Cherry Blossom had been a huge comfort to her in the early days of her mother's passing. Evelyn was devastated when Cherry Blossom passed away when she was in her second year of college.
Evelyn took Coffee outside and started at a brisk walk before beginning to jog. Evelyn hadn't gone out for her morning run in about two months. She had stopped after she found out she was pregnant.
Normally jogging or running while pregnant was safe but Evelyn didn't want to chance it. It felt good to breathe in the fresh cool air.
After about half an hour the winds became harsher and it became too cold for her to continue.
When they got back to her building it was 6:30. The desk attendant stopped her and told her that she had a visitor.
"A visitor? Who?" Evelyn asked the attendant, Ling was his name.
"Jinhai Li," he answered without looking down at the visitor log. Evelyn frowned but thanked Ling for notifying her. While she took the elevator up, she wondered why Jinhai was here so early.
When she got to her floor and the doors opened, she could see Jinhai. He was standing next to her door, with his back against the wall. His one of his hands was in the pocket of his black pea coat. He looked like a million bucks in front of her door.
"Jinhai," she greeted. "What are you doing here?"
"Good morning to you too," he said drily. He lifted a bag and the smell of pastries and coffee wafted up to her.
"Good morning," she said with a smile as she walked passed him to open her door. "It's still really early though." She walked and then closed the door behind him.
She took Coffee off his leash and set it on the kitchen counter.
"I'll be right back. I need a shower," Evelyn said. Jinhai nodded and surreptitiously watched as she walked out of the room.
Evelyn took a shower, then quickly put on her skincare. She still needed concealer for her dark under eye circles but they were not as puffy as they were yesterday.
When she stepped back out and joined Jinhai in the kitchen, the food was laid out.
Evelyn reached for a flaky piece of pastry and gently bit into it. The buttery taste blended perfectly with the warm peaches that melted in her mouth. She closed her eyes and almost moaned. It was either a really good piece of pastry or she was very hungry.
When she opened her eyes Jinhai was staring at her with an intense expression.
"Do I have something on my face?" she asked him. He didn't answer her. Instead he reached his thumb out and brushed it against the bottom right corner of her lip.
Her heart stopped beating for a second at his touch. He was so close that she could smell his cologne. It was different than the one he wore before. It was the perfect combination of spice and freshness. It was intoxicating.
He smelled incredible. She wanted to lean in and breathe in deeply and barely refrained.
"Thank you," she murmured. His thumb lingered, her lips gently brushing against it. She felt her cheeks flushing and her lips parted slightly.
Jinhai's eyes darkened with something akin to desire. Her eyes immediately trailed to his lips.
The last time his thumb brushed her lip was after that kiss almost a week ago. She felt her cheeks getting redder as she recalled. She had imagined what kissing him would feel like in the past. She always imagined that it would be incredible. She didn't realize how much of an understatement that was, until he had crushed his lips against hers.
Now that she thought about it, she didn't believe Shawn had ever kissed her so passionately. Maybe he did, but he had never said such romantic things that had supercharged her emotions and thus the moment.
Evelyn realized then how different Shawn and Jinhai were. Where they both gave off a vibe that they shouldn't be crossed, Jinhai could often make someone feel that way to their very core. Shawn had the power but didn't have the same level of charisma.
She realized how different she was when she was with Jinhai. He always seemed to understand her even when she hadn't said anything. He had a way of making her feel things to the core- to her core- that was the difference.
She had loved Shawn but not necessarily with all her heart. She had felt companionship with him. They had both come from influential families. They had good times together but it lacked that spark of passion that she seemed so effortlessly to have with Jinhai.
Jinhai mercifully withdrew his finger and turned to grab a cup of coffee before he handed it to her. It broke whatever trance she had been in.
Even though the moment had passed, Evelyn's heart still pounded heavily. It had always beat a little bit faster when he was around. She found herself once again needing to tame her heart.
"Thank you," she said again. He smiled and took a sip of his coffee before he began to eat as well. They ate in comfortable silence, after a while Evelyn's heart began to return to normal.
Evelyn enjoyed the companionship of having a quiet breakfast in the morning. After the first few years with Shawn, they stopped eating breakfast together on most mornings.
One of them would have a meeting to attend or they would have to run to the office to prepare for the day.
It wasn't often that Evelyn and Shawn ate breakfast together. But when they did, they often talked about work. It wasn't boring talk or so Evelyn had thought. They had helped each other with various projects they were working on individually. They had encouraged each other. She had another epiphany then.
Evelyn and Shawn had operated completely independently without active help from the other; they had for a while. Maybe that was why she barely found herself missing him. They had spent so much time apart and living their lives separately, that there was nothing to miss. Her way of living didn't change.
For example, eating together, dealing with the loss of a child together, putting her plans into motion together. There was nothing to miss because there was no "together", at least not with Shawn. She had done these things on her own for a while now.
In a way her life was already complete without him, not empty. It's why Shawn's present absence from her life wasn't affecting her the way a "broken heart" should. It was because her heart wasn't broken, at least with the loss of Shawn.
"What are you thinking about?" Jinhai's voice brought her back to the present. She blinked and her vision focused on him.
"I was thinking that it's been a while since I've enjoyed breakfast at home like this," she answered him honestly. He raised an eyebrow. "Shawn and I were always so busy that we rarely ate together," she clarified. Understanding dawned on him.
"You mean enjoying a meal at home, just the two of you," Jinhai stated. She nodded. As always he understood her even when she didn't say everything.
"Do you think that's weird?" she asked him. He shook his head, then paused.
"I'm just sorry," he said to her gently. It was her turn to raise an eyebrow. "Why are you sorry?" she asked him.
"That's not how married life was supposed to be. It's not how my parents were," he said. "Mine either," she agreed. "I guess that's how I thought it needed to be as we established our careers," she said.
"Do you still think it needs to be that way?" he asked her. She shrugged and he frowned.
"That's not how it would be with us," he declared. "What?" she asked. He leaned in closer and enunciated each word again. She felt her face heat up.
"Don't you sound presumptuous?" her tone was light. "I told you before, I'm not letting you go this time," he said his face was serious.
"What makes you so certain that I would want to be with you?" Evelyn asked him. He leaned in closer to her, his torso was almost parallel to the table. She made the mistake of inhaling his scent. She remained paralyzed in her seat, her eyes locked on his. He leaned back in his seat before he answered her.
"Because, you may not believe it yet. But I know that I'm the one that you want to be with. I'm the one that makes you feel calm, the one that you instinctively turn to for help," her face twisted. His smug look made her angry. She was about to refute him, even though he was right.
"But also, I never want live without you again. Because you're all that and so more for me," his tone wasn't smug now, but sincere. It took the her anger away. Instead his admission made her catch her breath.
'Did he really mean that?' she thought. He smiled at her.
"Finish your breakfast. You're going to be late," he said. She obediently finished her breakfast. She was glad to take it easy after her morning of sudden epiphanies. She was finding it harder and harder to not give in and accept Jinhai.
She had to remind herself that it was too soon to try to start a new relationship now. But the devil on her shoulder whispered to her, "But he's not new you've known him since you were four years old. If you hadn't met Shawn, you would be with him." She ignored the voice in her head that annoyingly made sense. Now was not the time. "Of not now, when?" She ignored that comment as well.
She quickly finished breakfast and dashed back into her room to finish getting ready for the day. When she came back, the dishes were cleared and Jinhai had bent down to pet Coffee.
"Are you ready?" she asked him. He stood and nodded. He held the door open and they left together. On the way down she called Mingxi.
Evelyn asked her to come to her apartment to look after her new pets. She promised an explaination later. She hung up after Mingxi conformed that she would be there soon. Evelyn was heading toward her car when Jinhai gave a slight tug on her arm.
"Where are we going?" she asked him. "I'm driving you today," he answered her.
"How am I supposed to get home?" she asked. "I'm picking you up," he answered. 'Well then, if that was the case,' she thought. She didn't ask anymore questions as she got into the car.