I failed my midterm exams. Miserably, I may add. I'd have to take remedial exams to make it, somehow.
"Wow, you failed." Anna teased, "that's a first."
I shrugged and stuffed my things inside my bag. "Yeah, there's a first time for everything."
"Do you want to talk about it ?" She looked at me with concern.
"Talk about what?" I looked at my exam sheet, the red marks glaring at me as if telling me how stupid I was. I turned my attention to Anna who was looking at me with eyes filled with concern. "Talk about how I couldn't find the x or y?"
She shook her head. "I like the analogy but you know i don't mean that." she pointed at the sheet in my hands. "but I'm sure you do know what I'm trying to say, you do know what the y is, you just don't want to face it."
I zipped my bag and held on the straps tightly. Maybe I know, maybe I don't know. Anna could be right. Since I left his house, I haven't been myself. I guess I should...no, this wasn't my decision, it was his. He never asked me if I was ok with it. He just said it's better for the both of us. He decided it because he said he cared for me. He wanted me to have a normal life.
"It's none of your business, Anna." I responded sharply.
She stood up and sighed. " I know. " She said, then started for the door.
"What is normal, Anna? " i blurted out.
She turned to me, her eyes glowing knowingly. "Nothing is."
Nothing is, huh. Then what's the point of me letting him dictate what I should do. My feelings matter too, right? I matter too.
"This is frustrating. " I spat under my breath as I made my way down the hall towards my next class.
"What is?" a student assistant was standing by the doorway towards the dean's office, a pile of paperwork on his arms.
"Nothing." i smiled awkwardly.
Nothing. That word again. Such a simple word but it could make or break someone.
"Oh" he smiled back, a flush of embarrassment in his face . He wasn't familiar to me, but judging from the gold psi pin in his ID, he's a psych major. He noticed me staring. "I'm Linc, Second year, Psych."
I nodded. "Jason, accounting."
"I know." He answered proudly.
"Lincoln!" The Dean called out from the other side of the door. Lincoln - Linc- flushed red and smiled at me. "Uhm, can you help me with the door, please?"
I opened the door for him and Linc brushed past me, his tiny frame squeezed through the small opening. "Nice to meet you, see you around. " He said one last time before the door closed behind him.
"Yeah, see you around." I answered knowing full well I looked like I was talking to the door.
See you around.
I definitely want to see someone around.
I absentmindedly picked up my things and hurried out. However, I haven't taken a few feet from the doorway when I saw him, standing beside the door. I turned and our eyes met. He didn't smile, his gaze didn't linger. One quick eye contact, then he was dragged away, not by his friends but someone I was not familiar with but obviously too familiar with Alex, because his arms were comfortably wrapped around him and easily snatched him away.
A few weeks back, he told me he wanted me to live a normal life and distanced himself. And now.. right now..