Chapter 92 - Help

I'm scared I can't read I'm scared I can't control my emotions make it stop I can't this hurts stop it go away

If I can't read I have one less thing to live for

I have only 3 things left.

I'm scared somethings taking what's precious to me away

I cant lose them I need them I'm selfish and stupid I'm a terrible human disgusting but I need to read it's what makes me happy and keeps me calm. Now when I read I get surges of negative emotions they turn into harsh words on myself it hurts to think it stops me from reading I need to read. Please if this is taken away I'm afraid what else can be. I'm scared what if I'm left with nothing to live for

I'm scared a thing with nothing is thrown away. I don't want to die but I don't want to live with nothing to look forward to or enjoy.