"There you are, honey! I've been looking for you everywhere", said my mom who approached me with gleeful eyes. I had been hiding in my room for quite some time as nervosity and angst inhabited in my mind. I am Stella and this is the story of my life and how it shaped me into the person I am today. It was my big day. I was getting married with the love of my life - Seth. He is the CEO of McStreme Group. It is the biggest company in the Navario city that deals with the construction and trading.
Seth and I have know each other for 5 years. I have always admired him. I still remember the first time that I saw him. He had sleek soft curls and waves. His amber coloured hairs reminded me of autumn . The first thing I noticed about him was his emerald eyes though, and his jovial face.
The memmories were fresh in my mind as if it was yesterday, he was going through a heart break as his then girlfriend cheated on him. Before that incident he always had a gentle smile but that tenderness was long gone now.
Several times, I tried to approach him, but I was repelled by the people that surrounded him.
It was only my best friend who was aware of the fact that I adored him.
In order qto be able to hold my love for once in this lifetime, I pleaded my friend to approach him.
Thus, he helped me in getting the two of us acquainted. After being a friend to him for a year, I decided to confess my feelings to him. He accepted me and my feelings. We have been dating since then. Whenever I was around him, I felt protected and adored. Seth was my first boyfriend who was also going to be my husband very soon. The happiness that surrounded was surreal.
I was aware that when I began to ponder, my thoughts usually transcended me to another place, a better place which was 'my imagination'. But as a result of it, I suffered in keeping up with the real world. Finally, after keeping my thoughts and anxiety aside, I started getting ready for the eve.
Today was a special day, everything seemed so surreal to me. I never thought I was worthy of a love so pure and unconditional. The moment I started walking towards the Isle, my heart began pounding heavily in my chest.
But with that several different memories of my love and me were coming in front of me. It was as if I couldn't even walk. With my arm entangled in the arm of my father, I walked towards my love. People's eyes were glued on to the every step I made, it made coping with the situation more arduous. But the moment he held my hand in his hand, I felt comfort and delight. Seth had this surreal effect on me. With his one touch, he could calm all my manners.
To be able to hold his hand and stand as his bride was still astonishing.
Though I was pretty composed on the outside, I was giggling like a toddler in my head because of all the gaiety that surrounded me. From the day that I saw him, I always dreamed of being married to him and loving him for the rest of his life. I never fell in love with anyone beside him. He was my first love.
I tried to catch a glimpse of my man. One glance at my Adonis, and I fell for him again. I wanted the ceremony to get over real fast, because I wanted to have him sooner. I kept staring at him but he didn't even wink. The whole time his gaze was fixated on the ground. Seth appeared impassive and inscrytable. We didn't make eye contact even for once. I tossed my thoughts aside by confining in my faith that he must be tired. Then, we took our oaths and decided to spend the rest of our lives together. Soon the day ended, but he didn't even utter a single word to me. I was so disappointed and hurt because of his indifference.
Then, it was the time of our wedding night. I was sitting in our room. It had been half an hour since the time I arrived. I was blankly staring at the wall clock and waited for an hour more. I was beginning to get nervous, and losing my faith. The thought that he left me gave me jitters, and then I called Seth.
"Hello!! Seth!!! Where are you? I am so worried. I am alone here. Where did you go?"
The next thing that I heard broke my heart into a million pieces. It was a woman's voice:
"He is busy at the moment. Don't disturb him".
tut...tut...tut...
Aghasted and petrified, I began to stride back and forth in the room. I needed to understand the reason behind his misdeed. My heart kept assuring me that he would never do anything to hurt me. That was so because he loved me. That whole night I couldn't sleep. The sound of every second of the clock , the vacant bed and the wedding ring reminded me of his absence.
I closed my eyes in order to forget the existing predicament.
I heard some whimpering at 4 am in the morning. I went out to see. It was Seth. His secretary, Rick carried him to our bedroom. Rick told me that he was drunk as he had been partying the whole night. I didn't comprehend his reasons for doing so. While lying beside him, I gaped at his beautiful face. His sleeping face comforted me and soon I drifted towards sleep.
After waking up, I realized Seth had woken up and was no longer lying in the bed. I heard the sound of the shower from the bathroom. I waited for Seth to come out and ask him about his unruly behavior. After getting out, he dressed up and didn't say a word to me and was beginning to leave. The frustration that I held from the previous night took over me, and I held his hand and yelled in a painful voice, "What's going on? Where have you been? Why won't you talk to me or look at me?? Why are you being so indifferent to me?".
The tears started streaming down my cheeks. He looked at me and said, "Let go of my hand! You are in no place to ask me anything". I could feel the hatred that was directed towards me. It was beyond the bounds of possibility to comprehend what changed him from his usual self. I didn't let go and hugged him from the back and said, "I want answers. I am your wife. I have been worried for you the whole night."
He turned back and held both of my hands in his one hand and glared in my eyes.
Then, he began scrutinizing me and my body like a hawk. I saw the rage in his eyes. It was as if there was only hatred that persisted in him. The stare sent a chill down my spine. I was shivering. He was hurting me. His grip was rigid. He never treated me in that manner before. I have always known him for the loving and caring guy that he had been. This was frightening and unsettling. What could have happened to cause him to hate me so much ? Why did he marry me if it wasn't in the name of love ? What was going on?
The questions echoed in my head, but the answers lied miles away.