Chereads / Equation Zero Battle/Line / Chapter 104 - Marry Christmas From Hero, Ken, and Author-Kun

Chapter 104 - Marry Christmas From Hero, Ken, and Author-Kun

'This Chapter is fully non cannon and shouldn't be taken seriously...'

Night Before Christmas

Age 1991

Oleander City

Hero was laid out on his bed as his eyes were squeezed shut. He was in a room of his own far off from anyone else as he slept peacefully-

"Wake up!"

A loud voice screamed as the wall was suddenly caved in and a massive metal sled with a rocket attached to it came crashing through.

"Ahh? What?" Hero asked sitting up with wide eyes. "K... Ken?"

Standing on the metal jet sled Ken stood clad in a small Santa outfit with her hands on her hips. "Come Mr. Reindeer!" Ken announced loudly. "It's gift giving time!"

"Ken what the hell! That was my house you crazy bit-"

"Language good sir!" An obnoxious voice of someone who thought they were the greatest thing since sliced bread announced. A figure jumped out of the sled landing on the ground clad in an Elf Uniform and wielding his mighty computer that allowed him to write the story you were currently reading.

"RainyLiquid2020?" Hero asked frowning. "Why the hell are you here?"

"Christmas special!"

"Oh... So we're just throwing out all sense of reason and cannon plot lines right now aren't we?"

"Yep!"

"Mr. Reindeer!" Ken announced loudly placing her hands on her hips once again. "We must be off! We have many gifts to deliver."

"Why the hell are you calling me- WHAT THE HELL AM I WEARING?" Hero looked down seeing the Reindeer outfit he was now it. It was just a pair of tight brown boxers and a pair of antlers.

"Shush..." RainyLiquid2020 said shushing his creation. He reached up and slowly placed a finger on Hero's nose painting it bright red. "It's for the fanservice." He whispered. "2.34% of our viewers are female rock that underwear you gorgeous beast."

Before Hero could ask any more foolish questions a collar was placed on him by Ken who attatched it to the sled. "It's time!" She announced back flipping into the sled. "Mush!"

"Ken I don't think I can-"

"I said Mush!" Ken yelled pulling a whip out and whipping Hero.

"Ow! God damn it!"

"The fan favorite waifu said mush!" RainyLiquid2020 announced cocking a glock he pulled out of thin air.

"What about the other Reindeers though?" Hero sighed his eye twitching. "The tale says there are a bunch more?"

"Good point..." Rainy nodded. "One sec..." He pulled out his laptap and began to type. "I'll use my Equation Full Bull Sh#t and make some random s##t up!" From the ground eight large Bestia Macht rose up all of them resembling Reindeers. "I'll name you... Dashy, Dany, Prancy, Vixey, Comey, Cupidey, Donny, and Blitzs-Blits."

"Those are dumb names-"

"I named you Hero Law, I've been very clear on how lazy I am coming up with names, now mush you s##tty protagonist."

Hero sighed as him and the eight other Reindeers began to mush through the cold snow. The rocket on the back of the sled ignited with flames as it took lift off into the air dragging Hero by the neck since he couldn't fly yet. He made several gasping sounds as he tried to pull himself up the sled and plopped down into a seat next to Santa Ken, and Rainy breathing heavily from being choked and from the freezing cold.

"H.... Hey..." Hero gasped. "Why does the text say 'since he couldn't fly yet' am I gonna be able to-"

"Don't read ahead in my glorious script! I got thirty two Volumes planned!" Rainy yelled.

Finally the sled slowly pulled to a stop in front of Squad Sixes building.

"We have to go in silently..." Ken whispered. She raised her hand up and fired out a beam of energy blasting down the wall.

"Ken!" Hero yelled with wide eyes.

"Don't worry." Rainy said. "I didn't write dialogue for anyone else in this chapter or planned for anyone waking up."

Hero sighed shaking his head as they slowly snuck in Ken now holding a massive bag. Conveniently Kitsune, Irene, Light, Katrina, Hannah, Dawson, and Jackson were all sleeping in the same room for some reason none of them even hearing the massive blast somehow.

"First up is Jackson Storm..." Ken whispered. She walked over to Jackson and pulled out a massive metal great sword. "This is the sword he used in the original Enforcer story." She whispered placing it down next to him. She moved over to Katrina next and pulled out a photo book with pictures of Jackson all in various poses. She placed it down next to the woman. Next up was Dawson. Ken pulled out a small plushie figure of Dawson Blight's Red Demon mode. He snuggled with it when she placed it down.

Rainy pulled out a camera taking a picture of all the sleeping adults' holding their presents.

Ken moved over to Hannah pulling out Jackson's pet bird Bestia Macht which she gave to the woman. She then moved over to Irene, Light, and Kitsune. "For Light I got this..." Ken said pulling out a Hero Law Plushie which she placed in the boys arms.

"What the hell?" Hero asked staring at it. "When was that made?"

"Don't ask." Rainy said moving over to a bed. In the bed Ace the awesome Black Coat from Volume One rested. RainyLiquid pulled out a small note writing something on it as he placed it next to Ace. "It's an I Owe You One Volume slip. He was totally gonna be in this Volume but I forgot to add him..."

"Next up is Kitsune..." Ken sad pulling out several 'Adult' manga's which she placed down next to him as well as a fedora and a new Katana. "And lastly Irene. She gets coal-"

"Ken..." Hero frowned tapping his foot.

Ken sighed rolling her eyes as she pulled out a heart shaped box of chocolates and cookies. "Fine. She gets sweets."

"Alright let's move on!" Rainy announced. "To Squad Seven!"

The group headed back out of the hole in the wall and got back in the sled, Hero refusing to mush it, instead got in a seat with the rest of the group because he's a big dumb cow-

"RainyLiquid2020 stop it!"

"Fine..."

The sled rocketed off at high speeds once again flying through the skies as it flew over the city and finally landed in front of the big building with a seven on it. Once again Ken blasted the doors down and once again for writing sake all of Squad Seven was in the same room.

Well all the important ones anyways...

Screw the back ground characters.

"For Emma a new nuns outfit." Ken announced placing the outfit down to the sleeping girl. "For Sera a plushie of herself so she will finally have someone to blab on and on bout those damn stories of hers-"

"Hey I actually like Sera..." Rainy frowned.

"Simp!" Ken moved over to Lucy dumping a pile of presents onto the girl. "Oh my God?" Ken said with wide eyes staring at all the gifts. "These aren't even the ones we got her? These ones are all just from AceDragon!" Ken said with wide eyes.

"Who the hell is AceDragon?" Hero asked.

"Just some Nerd in the comment sections." Rainy shrugged. "They reply to like every chapter their cool. Apparently they simp for Lucy and want you to end up in a Harem with Irene, Ken, and Lucy."

"Nice. What are the chances of that-"

"Zero."

"Damn it... AceDragon yell at RainyLiquid2020 in the comments."

Ken finally finished dumping all the gifts out into Lucy's bed as she moved over to Nick pulling out a prosthetic arm.

"To soon..." Hero shook his head. "Just give him a new wooden sword or something."

"Good idea..." Next Ken went over to Sif giving the sleeping girl a new pillow. "Alright who's next?"

"Just three side characters left." Rainy announced running over to the sled. They got back into it jumping into the sled as it took off and flew back into the air. Some time passed and they finally landed back down now in front of the Squad One building-

"Wow... Way to be descripted..."

"Shut up Hero I'm in a hurry, I didn't have to do this filler chapter bite me ya little punk. Santa Ken blast the door down!"

"Already on it." Ken said blasting the door down.

They ran in finding Max, Shiki, and Shelly.

"One sec..." Hero muttered punching the sleeping Max and Shiki. "Alright now give them their gifts."

"I don't know what to give any of them?" Ken questioned looking into her bag.

"Meh. Give both boys coal." Rainy shrugged.

"Really?"

"Yeah. They both broke the power scale when they were introduced. No clue what I was thinking... They've been bad. Not Shelly though. She's my favorite girl character."

"I thought I was your favorite?" Ken asked.

"Uh... Quick give them coal!"

"Smooth..." Hero said flatly.

"Don't make me f##k up your character arc like I did in Enforcers." Rainy warned.

Ken shrugged ignoring Hero and Rainy who broke out into a fight as she placed a bag of coal next to Max, and Shiki. "But what about Shelly?"

"I got this." Rainy nodded pulling out an Eins Licht plushie, as well as a Ken, and Hero, plushie and placing them next to the girl.

"Why are you placing a plushie of me next to her?" Ken asked.

"Yuri bait?"

"That's hot."

The group quickly went back to the sled as it took off once more.

"So are we done?" Hero yawned. "Cause it's freaking cold, late, and the underwear are starting to chaff my..."

"Not yet..." Rainy said shaking his head. "There's still one more home we need to visit... I never forgot about her. The one who started this story..."

The sled took off. Seconds later it arrived in Middlemist City... Right outside of Leena's house.

Hero gulped slightly finally knowing why he was here. He slowly got out of the sled, Ken, and RainyLiquid2020 staying behind. He slowly moved over to the house opening the door which was unlocked. He found her inside continently on a bed just as the others had been. The inside of the house resembled the restaurant from the first chapter only difference being the bed in the center of the room.

Hero let out a soft snort as he moved over to Leena's sleeping form and delivered a soft kiss on her forehead. "Marry Christmas Leena. hanks for being the first ever thought up character for Equation Zero Battle/Line. Sorry we never got to you in Enforcers, and we left you so quick in this new story..." Hero slowly turned leaving the house as he wandered back to the sled and got back into the seat. "Let's go home."

The trip back was silent as it slowly settled back down in Oleander city.

"Well then." Rainy announced once both his creations were out of his sled. "I must be off-"

"I had a question?" Ken asked.

"Yeah what?"

"Am I ever gonna end up with Hero-"

"No comment goodbye!" He announced.

"Wait I had a question to?" Hero yelled waving his arms around.

"Yeah? What?"

"So what's the deal with those whole Dragon things and me being called Hero but I used to be Row and-"

"Uh... Well would you look at that my cats on fire! Bye!" Rainy yelled as his body erupted into flames and he vanished leaving the two outside of Hero's house.

"That guys an asshole..." Hero sighed throwing his arms behind his back. "He could at least tell me what my level two form is..."

Ken let out a small snort for a moment as she stared up at the black sky. "This was fun. Let's do it again next year..."

"Hey Ken."

"Yeah?"

"I almost forgot." Hero reached out placing his hand on the girls head. "You were the first character Rainy made right? And if I recall he thought you up back in 2012 on Christmas so I think it's only fair to say Happy Birthday Ken." Hero smiled. "The first ever character Rainy ever made. Who knew that a few years later we would have 422k views, and 107 chapters written out... We still got a long way to go before the end of this story."

Ken let out a small giggle for a moment as she turned away. "Yeah... We do..." She was silent as her and Hero stared ahead taking in the dark sky which rained down waves of ice and snow on the land. Her hand slowly came out as she gripped his hand. "So... Wanna do it?"

"Hell yeah I do. Fanfic time-"

"Marry Christmas everyone! See you next year!"