…
There was only darkness.
As if I was in a deprivation tank, my consciousness woke only to meet endless darkness.
(…..w-what happened…..where is everyone?…where is this?....)
Strangely, even though I said my consciousness woke up, I could not feel my body in any way.
I tried to move my hands...they're gone.
I tried to move my feet...also gone.
I tried to move my mouth...it's gone too.
I tried to move my eyes...my eyes don't exist.
(…..is this the world after death?.....Am I dead?...is everyone else….)
Even while I continue to say these things that I'm worried about, I felt as if I was talking about someone else's problems.
It was as if that along with my body, my emotion too disappeared into thin air.
The sadness, despair, even other emotions, that I should have felt...became concepts I knew but couldn't understand.
(…..if I died…does Mom and Dad know?.....Hopefully they won't feel too sad about me…..)
With only my inner voice proving my existence is still here, I continuously tried to think on instinct, although I don't know why I thought that, but if I didn't continue thinking I will just disappear into the endless darkness.
Time too was a concept seemed to have lost its meaning as I continuously think various and even boring topics.
Has it only been a second? A minute? 100 minutes? Days, months, or even years?
I continuously only 'exist' within the darkness.
This continued until after who knows how long that I began to regain an emotions I thought I lost.
Tiredness. Boredom. Regret.
Why do I have to do this? What meaning is there in keeping my existence? Would it be better if I just allowed the darkness to take me?
Negative emotions continuously pour out until my mind was filled to the brim with them.
Just when I was about to give up, a new feeling emerged from the deep recesses of my mind.
Determination.
(…..not yet! I can't give up just yet! There's still something I have to do!! Don't know what it is though!)
Filled with a mysterious determination that even I am unable to understand where it was coming from, I continued the battle of persistence to preserve my own existence.
(….haha...this reminds of something...isn't it kind of like when I played with Ashe for the first time?)
That's right. While the feeling is different, the root of those feelings is the same.
Of the first 6 characters, only I kept playing with Ashe Daemon.
Even after I met my first and greatest hurdle that every Ashe user meets, I am one of the few who kept persevering.
In the end, I was the only left who was able to persist with Ashe Daemon that I had even reached level cap, gave him the best equipment, and create the ultimate fighting method using his unique trait.
What others would have stopped after a few weeks in, I was the only one who kept using him since the very beginning.
If I were to be asked what was the reason why I put so much effort into a character as tricky as Ashe, I would not know what to say.
The one thing I can be sure of to say…..is that it just felt 'right'.
When I first laid my eyes on Ashe Daemon, I knew he was the one I need, instinctively.
When I decided this is how I fight using Ashe Daemon, I instinctively knew this was the right way.
This was an instinct that only applied when I played in VDS. Unfortunately, my test grades had not improved when it was multiple choice.
However, this instinct is back again. Even now it is telling me that I should not give up.
It is a mysterious feeling. I had always felt that if I were to follow this instinct nothing can ever go wrong.
So, placing complete trust on it, I put everything into persevering. I persevered and persevered. When I felt like I couldn't do it again, I persevered against that feeling also.
It took some time, but it looks like that my perseverance seems to have been rewarded.
{Doth thee wish to liveth once more?}
A mysterious voice seems to echo through my mind. Is it young or old? Man or woman? Language? A voice that seems to both to have everything and yet have nothing at the same time interrupted my thoughts.
(…..!?!?! WHO IS THERE?!?!)
The mysterious voice did not answer my question. Without any change from before it asks once again.
{Doth thee wish to liveth once more?}
Does this mean if I answer the question, would I be able to live again? Should I answer yes? But what if this was a devil's contract and the price is my soul? But what if this is true?
As I continued to endlessly worry, the mysterious voice repeats once again.
{Doth thee wish to liveth once more?}
….no, this my chance. Maybe be my final chance. My instincts are telling me to say yes...
Okay!
(YES!!)
As soon as I finished answering, a small 'something' seems to have taken shape.
{If't be true thy wish is to liveth, wilt t behest at the expense of another?}
The moment the mysterious voice 'spoke' these words, it reminded me one of the last things I had talked about with the members of [Vers Warriors]:
-Hey guys, weird question. If you guys were ever given a chance to like become your character, would you?-
As this thought crossed my mind, my body moved before I even realized it.
(NO!!)
Boom!
The moment I answered, the small 'something' instantly expanded. It continuously grows bigger without any sign of stopping.
Alarmed, I quickly focused upon the mysterious voice in hopes it would give me an explanation.
The voice spoke once again. However, this time it seems to be filled laughter.
{As expected of thee}
The small 'something' had become as big as a house. With a loud rip, a large crack appeared in the middle of that 'something'. It looks suspiciously like a giant mouth…..
{I has't hath heard thy answer}
Without any time to react, the giant mouth opened, sucked me into its mouth, and instantly bit me in half.
(A…..AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!)
{Has't safe travels}
It hurts! It hurts! It hurts!
A pain I have never ever experienced ever in my life ran through my consciousness.
It was if my soul is being split into two.
Fortunately, the pain would not last long.
After the pain, I once again returned to darkness.
.
.
.
I woke up once again.
Unfortunately, it seems that nothing has changed much.
The only that seems to have changed is a dull pain that continues to affect my consciousness.
(….w-what happened this time? Was this a mistake?....)
It was at this time, 'something' appeared in front of me within the darkness.
What seemed to be a floating curved holographic screen appeared in front of my eyes….though I don't have any right now.
(W-what?!)
With a *blip* sound, the screen started to show a blurry image of what appears to be a moving shadow.
Not only that, but sound also seems to have come through the screen at the same time.
Shocked, I continued to stare at this mysterious phenomenon.
Unfortunately, for some reason, the image within the screen remained absolutely blurry and the sound also remained muffled and unintelligible.
It was at this time my consciousness once again started to blacken.
It seems that the pain I feel is causing me to lose consciousness once again.
(Damn…it)
Without any way to resist, I once again fall in darknesses loving embrace.
.
.
This cycle of waking and losing consciousness continued many times afterward.
Luckily, the pain continued to lessen each time.
Each time I become awake, the mysterious screen was always there.
And within those times, the image showed on the screen gradually begin to change.
To what was originally a blurry image, it continuously sharpened to the point where size, shape, and depth became clearer.
In the same way, the sound quality coming from the screen continues to gradually get clearer to where I could distinguish sounds which appear to be a female voice, and the sound of a baby crying.
Using all the clues I gathered from each awakening, I drew to a conclusion.
It seems that I have reincarnated.
However, this is not a normal reincarnation.
Before playing VDS, my favorite hobby had been searching and reading webnovels.
Within many of those webnovels, reincarnation was a common theme.
The main character dies only to, through mysterious means such as a god, has their soul transferred into either a new body of a dying individual or complete reincarnation from birth.
The reincarnated main character would live completely as a new existence, having full control of their new body.
This, however, did not happen to me.
It seemed that during the time when I talked with the mysterious voice, my soul had been split into two.
How do I know? I can somehow sense the existence of two halves of my soul.
While the exact mechanics elude me, I can have awareness of my nearly split soul which is only connected to each other by a thin thread of consciousness. I called this my 'soul link(temp)'.
However, it seems that this soul split is not the same as just creating two versions of my self.
It looks like my entire consciousness resides in only one-half of my split souls.
The other half seems to have created a new consciousness that attached itself to the body of a baby, becoming the owner of the body.
This resulted in a weird dynamic: a baby that has two(?) souls but only one soul is in control of the body.
It also seems that the soul containing my consciousness is unable to control the baby's body. I have tried various times, but it seems that I can neither communicate with my other half nor replace it.
In this state, it seems to be more like a 'possession' rather than 'reincarnation'.
Having thought up to there, I felt my consciousness slip back into the darkness once again.
It seems this would be the last time. The pain I feel right now is nearly non-existent.
Reaching that conclusion, I let the darkness take over.
.
.
When I woke up again, I noticed the change immediately.
The pain which ravaged my half of the soul had disappeared.
I felt a need to breathe a huge amount of clean air and then exhale in relief. Even though I can't.
As always, while I do have awareness, my body I am used to having is nowhere to be seen.
"&$^#*$&."
(Hmm?)
After hearing what appears to be a women's voice, I turned my attention towards the floating screen.
What I saw was the image of a beautiful young women's face. The image is much clearer than it has ever been.
With long silver hair and deep silver eyes, she was the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.
Eh? Silver hair? It is not dye, is it? And those silver eyes….I have never seen someone have such eye colors before. Color contacts?
As I continued to be shocked and dazzle, a peculiar feeling passed through me.
Do I know this person from somewhere?
This inexplicable feeling continued to grow stronger. Even though I know I have never met someone with such physical characteristics before, I could not get rid of the feeling.
Without knowing about my plight, the beautiful women got closer to the screen.
It seems that the baby I am sharing this body with is probably her child.
The woman continued to talk to my host in a language that I was completely unfamiliar with.
It was similar to a combination of western languages like English or German, yet different.
Still trying to figure out what is so familiar about the women, I continued to turn my mind inside out….until I heard her spoke again.
"&#&@#$%...@$ Ashe."
(?!!?!)
Did she just say, Ashe!?