I woke up with the usual scene, the daylight gently lighting up my room through my closed blinds. Groaning as I got up, I checked my phone for the time and scowled. It said 3 o'clock this time.
I shuffled my way to the bathroom, messing with the A/C unit before brushing my teeth. In the morning, I always brushed my teeth super slowly, with it usually taking me more than ten minutes before I finished. I grabbed my wash towel from the shower and allowed the hot water to thoroughly soak it before squeezing it all out. I buried my face in the towel, moving it around as with as little movement as possible, trying to take away all the warmth it had to offer before the inevitable cool down.
After that, I dragged my feet across the wooden floor to the kitchen, having to go down a step into the living room before heading up another step to get it. Using my hand to cover up my loud yawn, I opened the pantry and found nothing inside. The refrigerator and the freezer were the same way. I scratched my disheveled bed hair, letting out another sigh.
I shuffled back to my room, grabbing my pair of old, worn out tennis shoes to take me to my ultimate destination. I decided to put on some deodorant before heading out, but I didn't bother changing out of my pajamas though.
I grabbed my key, phone, and wallet before putting on my shoes and heading out of my room, taking an immediate left, a step, an immediate right, and onwards towards the front door. I let out a slight hiss as my eyes got attacked by the light of outside, but I quickly adjusted and walked outside, the first time I had done so since I had gotten back from Hiro's home.
Knowing it was going to take a while to get to the store, my thoughts started to wander as I mechanically made my way through the usual route.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It had been quite some time since I had gone to the store with another person. I think almost five years now, if I'm remembering correctly. Even before everyone disappeared, I didn't go out with my family much. I just stayed inside, playing online games with Lachesis. Although, I also hadn't done that in a while as well…
It was during the winter, and since it was going to snow the next day, we decided to go out and buy a bunch of supplies to prepare for the coming snowstorm.
I didn't really want to go, so my mom practically had to drag me out of the house. That time as well as today, I went in my pajamas.
When we got there, she split up our team to get food; my brother went to get drinks, my stepdad got meats, my mom got fruits and vegetables, and I got the sweets.
I love sweets, and that hasn't changed since they disappeared. They knew that, so it was probably so I could get all my favorites without complaint. I grabbed a basket and carried it over to the cookies, where I saw lines and lines of them, just waiting for me to pick them out.
I got a lot of strange looks however, due to my unusual appearance. Even back then, I didn't take care of my hair too well, although compared to now it wasn't as bad. Even so, I ignored them, since I got similar looks at school. It just proved to me that adults act childish, even more so than kids at times.
I grabbed two of each of my favorite types, filling the basket halfway before lugging it to the candy. Before I could get there however, a store clerk stopped me before I could grab any, and he stared down at me with unusually cold eyes.
He asked me with a stern voice that had a harsh edge to it how I was going to pay for it, and I simply ignored him as I tried to maneuver my way around. He gripped my shoulder tightly, his cold pale hands seemingly burning through my clothes.
He started to drag me away from the aisle, muttering to himself about homeless kids and how they always act this way. I tried to tell him I had my parents with me in the store, but he refused to listen, calling me a liar.
He led me to the storage area of the store and locked me in the room. Outside, I could hear him calling somebody, who I now presume would be the police.
I could only clench my fists in silence, anger welling up from within. People were always like this to me. I didn't get it. Why did they always assume the worst of me? Because of my hair? The way I dress? Even now, I still couldn't understand what was going through his mind.
He even took away my basket of sweets, the only real thing I was looking forward to from the forced visit to the store. And before I knew it, the tears started to well up from my eyes, and they fell with such ferocity as my emotions started to crack through the surface.
(Well, you're not much better, are you?)
The room got darker, and my crying got worse as these thoughts pervaded through my brain.
(After all, look at the things you did.)
I didn't mean to do it.
(So that makes it alright then? You're such a coward, you should've been the one to disappear.)
I could feel myself starting to fall downward towards a cold dark abyss.
I would disappear if I could, but…
(But what? You can't do, it can you? A coward who's too afraid to do to himself what he does to others, why are you the only one left!?)
Sorry…
YOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULTYOURFAULT!!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I woke up on a soft, earthy surface, and I could feel myself getting poked as kids around me were wondering if I was dead.
I groaned and picked myself up, and the group of four kids, 3 guys and one girl, froze as they stared at the supposed dead man. The one holding a stick, presumably the leader, lead the escape, holding up his stick as the others followed behind him. A scene that was all too familiar to me as a strange sense of deja-vu enveloped me, but it soon vanished, leaving me with my usual emptiness.
I looked at my phone for the time and let loose another sigh.
It was almost 5 o'clock now.
I glanced around me and soon realized I was at the park I used to play at back as a kid. I immediately stopped myself from continuing with my train of thought, it only leading down to my first regret in life.
I brushed off the dirt from my well-worn pajamas and proceeded onwards to the store, alone as I had been doing it for 4 years now.
The walk to the store was slow but uneventful and I grabbed three carts before entering the store. It wasn't the same store as back then, my mom refused to go there anymore after I almost got put in an adoption center.
I rolled the three carts around the store, piling it high with food and other important necessities required for living. One cart was entirely for food, filled with cans, frozen foods, spices, oatmeal, cereal, and other varieties of food and vegetables. The next cart I filled with entirely water, ranging from small water bottles to the large 2-liter ones, with the only exception being two packs of soda I managed to cram in. The last cart also had water, but it was more a miscellaneous cart, filled with bowls, plates, utensils, paper towels and tissues (the soft kind, I didn't skimp out), coffee beans and tea, fruits, and packs of candy among other things.
Luckily for me, the people here were rather nice, and knowing I did this once a month, had a separate place where I could checkout and pay for my stuff, since I had been doing this for about four years now. They once asked me if I wanted them to get the stuff beforehand, but I vehemently refused, telling them it was something I had to do. In the end though, they managed to convince me to allow them to help lug around the carts.
Soon, I had finished up my gathering of food, and made my way to the special checkout designed for me. Five employees swiftly brought out their scanners and started to take out each item, scanning as fast as they could, before rearranging them back it in the carts. After finishing up scanning the last thing, they showed me the absurd total I had gotten, and I pulled out my wallet, grabbing the card I needed.
Since my family's disappearance, I was pretty much left with a fortune once they declared my family dead and all their assets were liquidized. Since I'm still not eighteen yet, I had to let the government and the bank deal with all the major stuff, but in a nutshell, I got issued a special card that allows me access to all the money I was left. I could only use it for this once I begged them for permission, and other for this large purchase, I could transfer about $500 dollars a week to my checking account if I needed to, which I rarely did. The government and bank also allowed me to stay in my own home, and they pay the bills for me from all the money I had. I also asked them to pay off the mortgage off the house, and now once I'm eighteen, the house will be officially mine.
The store clerks, who had gotten informed of my situation, never once asked me what I planned to do with the food. Instead, I paid, and they helped me wheel the carts to the empty parking lot in the back, and then left me there to do whatever I wished.
I sat down on the curb and stared at the food I had gotten, saying the word before my mind wandered away once more…