I honestly don't even know what to do with my life. I want to join the military but that is impossible.
I sigh to myself. I'm honestly just thinking about it more because of this bullshit dance. My friends basically ditched me and now I realize I was right about them from the beginning.
They were never really my friends and they likely never will be. We are just being nice to each other because our options are limited. I always want to give people the benefit of the doubt and then people turn around and are shitty to others.
I logically know that not all people suck but I still sit on the cold hard ground in an empty hallway regardless.
I stare down into my lunch. I honestly didn't even want to eat with my high school friends right now. I tried the cafeteria. Way too much noise.
I tried the bathroom. Nope. It's gross.
I tried the school square, the back building, the bleachers...I just want to be alone right now and I don't know how to do it.
"Why are you eating in the hallway?" I look up and Vy is standing there looking really confused.
I shrugged. "I just want some quite is all
..you know...to be alone...Noise is really bothering me right now. Where's Richard?" I asked.
"He is eating like everyone else. I finished early and decided to take a quick walk...You do know, you can eat with one of the teachers in the classroom?"
I blinked at her slowly.
"Really?" I asked.
"Sure. A lot of my friends do it...sometimes you just need to....uh...process? Life isn't easy. Try the history and language teachers. They are nice people." she said and simply walked away. I was grateful for the blunt interaction.
I decided to walk in my World History 101 class. He was sitting there with 5 other students sitting alone in different areas.
No one was talking.
"Hello Ms. Brown. What brings you to my class at this hour?" asked Mr. Helmstader
"I was just wondering if I could eat here?" I asked holding half my lunch.
He smiled a small crinkled smile. "All my students are welcome."
I sat down and continued my lunch in peace.
It was nice.