A couple of days went by and not a single soul had visited the room. Even though our club description was, according to sensei, to help troubled kids like us with their problems, there was not even a single instance where these so-called 'troubled kids' passed by.
Not that I have any complaints.
For the past few days since this club was lit green, Segawa and I did nothing at all aside from reading a book that we brought with us for the day. There were some casual small exchanges that happen every now and then, but the majority of our time was spent diving into literature.
Segawa placed herself at the middle of the table, facing the door in front with the open windows behind her back. While me on the other hand, distanced myself from the girl in question and fixed my spot at the side of the table, with the bookshelf in front and the stack of chairs behind.
As the clock's second-hand continued to hurt my ears, I took a quick glance in Segawa's direction.
She was reading a book from beneath the table, both hands firmly gripped on the paperback's cover. She would occasionally break into a small smile from time to time, then revert to her indifferent look as she continued to read.
The contrasts of those two distinct figures reminded me of that day.
Every time this girl would put her guard down, she would act all carefree, in complete opposition to her usual demeanor. But once she has her guard raised up, she pushes everyone away with her straight-out cold front.
It made me wonder how I, aside from sensei, was able to give her the sense of security that allowed her to put her guard down like that. It's seriously an unknown that's been bugging me for a while now.
It's not like I didn't have the courage to ask her flat out, it was just embarrassing to ask something like that in a straightforward manner. But with the past few days that went by, I was able to organize my thoughts so I could ask her in a roundabout way.
"Say, Segawa." I closed my book with my thumb as a bookmark.
"What is it?" She sent a question back without batting an eye, her gaze still fixed on her paperback's way.
"About the other da-"
In that instance, my words were stopped by an unfamiliar sound. It was probably because it was all too new to me, that it completely caught my attention, preventing my words from going any further.
It was a knock on the door.
With the knock on the door serving as her signal, Segawa lifted her face as she closed her book shut, giving a casual "come in" to the other end, as if giving out commands was all too natural for her.
And as urged by the commander, the recipient of the order slowly slid the door open, hands showing signs of hesitation pushing the door to the side. And as soon as the door was widely slid open, the person took a step forward and entered the room, looking awfully uneasy with eyes firmly glued to the floor.
It was a girl.
"E-excuse me for intruding.." The girl spoke timidly as she closed the door behind.
As the person in debate had entered my line of sight, my eyes began to rot with the sight of that figure.
The girl who had entered was also a second year, as her outfit suggests. She had light dyed hair that extended down to her elbows, and a well-developed figure that was a couple of stories above average that of your typical high school girl. Her uniform was also mess and was worn improperly, with the top-most button of her blouse undone and the ribbon on her neck nowhere to be found. In fact, if it weren't for the color of her indoor shoes, you wouldn't have known which year level she was from.
She was indeed your typical high school girl who was situated somewhere at the top of the caste, the image that she had wouldn't beg to deny that fact. In short, she was my enemy.
As a person situated at the very bottom of the spectrum, I've harbored a deep hatred for the people from the upper rung of the social ladder. Looking down on people from below your rank was something I wasn't very fond of. Well, I might be only able to say this because I had no one to look down on. And it's probably just my inferiority complex at play. But that wasn't the only reason why this person was my enemy. There was a deeper reason to it that's rooted deeper than that.
As the high school girl's eyes had met my rotting gaze, she broke into an uneasy smile as she timidly waved my way.
"H-hiro..I didn't know you were here."
"Oh, sorry to disappoint."
The girl who gave that greeting was a well-known figure in class 2-C, and probably to our whole grade to a certain extent. She was also, regrettably, my childhood friend. Sanae Erika.
From grade school up to my first year in middle school, this girl and I have had a somewhat close relationship. She wasn't the kind of childhood friend who usually went to your home to bathe with you when you were kids, then later when you grow up, would become conscious about those times which would trigger a flag along the way. She was far from that.
She was just someone who lived in the neighborhood nearby and also happened to be enrolled in the school I was in. We played from time to time and hung out after school every now and then. But eventually, that shallow bond gradually faded through the years, until it reached the point where our paths never coincided with one another again.
Well, I'm pretty sure that's how it usually is with childhood friends. And probably friends in general as well.
Either way, I couldn't stand to be in the same room as this girl. Just the thought of the air getting clouded with awkwardness was enough to drive me away.
As the urge to leave began to slowly kick in, my legs were stopped by Segawa's words.
"I never knew you were acquainted with a cute girl like this." She silently murmured as she whipped her gaze my way. "In fact, I'm even more surprised to know that you're friends with anyone to begin with."
"…quit looking at me with those genuinely astonished eyes, it's nothing like that. She's just someone I knew in the past is all." I sighed, averting my eyes from the girl in question. "And where's that creepy modesty coming from, you're actually pretty cute yourself." You even said it yourself with that shameless mouth.
As if my words hadn't reached a single soul inside, a strange silence fell over the whole clubroom. Unable to comprehend the situation at hand, I scanned through the room for the possible cause. And what met my eyes were two girls in a state of shock. W-what..did I say something weird?
"F-flattery won't get you anywhere.."
Through the stagnant air that filled the room, Segawa's soft and feeble voice suddenly cut through the silence, her eyes fixed elsewhere with slightly flushed cheeks. It was then when I realized what that pause was all about.
"Oi, don't give me that. You were the one who said it yourself. I just repeated what you said before."
"S-stop making me look like a narcissist here! Who would say something as shameless as that out loud!?" She turned to me with her rage suppressed, her cheeks completely flushed with eyes ready to kill.
"Well…but, I'm actually telling the truth here though.." I silently murmured to myself, a resigned sigh slipped past my lips.
"Y-you sure have gotten bold through the years huh, Hiro," The unwanted girl suddenly spoke from the side, her cheerful tone caused my brows to close-in. "This is really a surprise! I never knew you had any friends at school. Just what kind of relationship do you and Segawa-san have?"
Having heard her completely off-the-mark statements, I turned to my side out of sheer irritation, looking her straight in the eyes as I kept the urge to erupt inside.
"Look here, first of all, drop the whole Hiro thing will you? We're not kids anymore to call each other by stupid nicknames. And second, me and Segawa are merely just clubmates. Nothing more and nothing less. Quit pushing your weird assumptions on me."
In response to my somewhat suppressed outburst, Sanae was struck silent, a dumbfounded expression playing on her face. It took her a moment or two before she got back to her senses.
"Ah, r-right..just clubmates. Mmm." She weakly nodded with a weary smile, furtively avoiding my gaze. "Sorry for jumping to conclusions back there, I totally misread the whole thing..a-ahahaha."
"R-right, as long as you understand." I averted my eyes from the girl up front.
This girl…why does it feel like she got publicly shamed? I'm pretty sure I just cleared up the misunderstanding she had. Stop making me feel guilty with that complicated smile..
"A-ahem," A sheepish cough suddenly caught my attention, my eyes inadvertently moved towards the source's way. "Would you mind filling me in with all this?"
As if unable to stand being left in the dark, Segawa prompted me for an explanation.
"Ah, this is Sanae Erika from class 2-C." I briefly replied as I pointed at Sanae.
"Ah! I'm Sanae Erika from class 2-C, N-nice to meesh tyu!" Intimidated by Segawa's noble presence, she stuttered half-way through her introduction with a bow.
Calm down, she's human just like you. Surprisingly.
"Ah, I know at least that much, I was asking what kind of relationship you two have."
"Ah, me and Hiro are childhood friends." The third party replied before I could even get the chance to talk.
"Oi, stop saying more than you should." You'll get your words used against you in court someday if you keep that up.
"Childhood friends.." Segawa murmured with a puzzled expression, her hand on her chin as she paused in thought. "For how many years?"
"Ahh..since 3rd grade, I think?"
"What's this supposed to be, a job interview?"
"No. I was just wondering how you turned out to be…you, even though you had a childhood friend like this by your side."
"Are you lookin' for a fight or something? Me being involved with this girl has nothing to do with how I am today. In fact, it's the complete opposite."
That's right. Tracing it back to my middle school days, me having no involvement with this girl might have probably been one of the reasons why I became the person I am today.
Having been reliant on others as a kid, I've always been following after others' steps, just to have that sense of security of not being left out. I tried to keep our relationship close, whether it was through short conversations, casual greetings, or even simple gestures. But like any other person, Sanae was bound to change eventually. As the years went by, she continued to drift further away, until she got too far out of reach that I eventually gave up.
It was then when I learned that one should not rely on others too much. In fact, it'd be better to just screw that thought and stop relying on others completely. You won't be let down by your expectations, and you'll learn to be independent by depending merely on yourself.
In a sense, I guess I should be somehow grateful to this girl in a way. I wouldn't have matured if I continued clinging onto others. But since I'm still the one who trained myself to become non-reliant, my gratitude didn't really have a recipient.
"And by opposite, you mean?"
"Ah, well, it means what it means."
"Oh.." Segawa murmured, uneasily. "I don't really get it, but I won't pry any further."
After hearing Segawa's reassuring statement, an uneasy laugh began playing from the side.
"Ah, I'm sorry about that, it's kinda my fault...I guess." Sanae said with an apologetic tone, eyes tainted with pity directed my way.
The look in her eyes seriously rubbed me the wrong way.
I don't need the pity of someone like you. I don't regret anything that happened before. If I were to wish for anything to change, it would be a great insult to who I am today, and big slap on the face to the person who went through those hard years alone.
Although I wanted to let all those thoughts break through, I stopped myself with a deep sigh, swallowing those words back into my throat.
"Well, it's all in the past so let's just leave it at that. There isn't any point in dwelling in the past after all." As my words made their way out one by one, a tightening sensation began playing in my chest. Nothing that another sigh couldn't relieve.
"Mmm, I guess you're right.." Sanae nodded with a small smile.
With the tension in the room finally beginning to die down, the silence that fell down on us was rather pleasing to my ears. The ticking sound of the clock being the only thing playing in the background.
After the rather short pause, Segawa placed her book atop the table, sitting up straight with her eyes fixed on Sanae. "So, Sanae-san, what kind of business did you have with us again?"
"Ah r-right!" Sanae answered in a frenzy, both hands tightly clenched on her shoulder bag's strap. "I was told by Yasuhara-sensei that you guys help others out with stuff, so I thought I could get help with something."
"Which is?"
"Ahh..w-well," Unable to go on any further, Sanae paused, shooting short glances my way. "It's kind of hard to say with Hiro in here.."
What, is this supposed to be one of those 'girls only, no boys allowed' kind of talk? Like the ones they had in middle school where the boys and girls were separated during physical education class? This isn't the kind of club we are though…In fact, is there even any club that tackles sensitive topics like that?
I shot a quick glance in Segawa's direction, raising my petition against this girl's request. But betraying my expectations, she beckoned me to leave with a jerk of the chin, eyes saying 'you're kind of hurting my eyes so could you leave and never come back' directed my way.
So you're dead set on accepting the request I see. Why do I feel like I'm being ridiculed for my gender here…
"Guess I'll go grab something to drink for a bit."
Without any form of retort or complaint, I did as I was told and headed towards the exit. But as soon as I placed my hand on the door, Sanae suddenly called out to me.
"Ah, no..you don't have to leave, Hiro." She turned to me with a half-step. "It's not that I can't say it with you here, it's just a little embarrassing.."
I somehow appreciated the thought, but with the reason that she had, it only served more reason to leave.
"Don't get the wrong idea, I just want to get something to drink is all."
"I-is that so.."
"Yeah."
Without looking an inch back, I slid the door open and took a step out, leaving the rest in Segawa's hands.