أشد الفاقة عدم العقل
Lack of intelligence is the greatest poverty
Rose
Opening the door slightly as I peek down the hall—trying to see if there's any sign of Elia. After what happened a few hours ago, I don't even know if I can face him. Honestly, I can just act like nothing happened; as if he didn't kissed my cheek.
I don't know what's wrong with me. It was just a kiss on the cheek, right? It's not like we did something out of the line. Nothing wrong about a kiss on the cheek. He was being a gentleman, perhaps. By the look of it, he is already a gentleman. Come on, he kissed my cheek when he could have gone for the lips!
Sighing, I push the door wider as I walk out of the room. My eyes wander down the hall; trying to see if there's anyone especially Elia. Maybe he's asleep, it's three in the morning anyway. I couldn't. Not when I know he's here, in this house.
Quickly making my way down the hall and down the stairs but I immediately stop as soon as I bump into someone. Shit. I curse mentally before moving back slightly and see the familiar brown eyes. My heart somehow stops beating when I realise that he has his arms around my waist—preventing me from falling.
It also took me awhile that I have my hands on his chest.
Elia looks up at me as he frowns his eyebrows in confusion, ''Are you going somewhere?'' He asks. I blink a few times, making sure that this isn't a dream because everything feels real. My mind can't seem to remove the feeling of his arms around my waist—maybe he should move it first so that I can actually talk.
''Uh, I'm hungry.'' I mutter.
He smiles, revealing his dimple, ''Of course you would be. You didn't come down for dinner earlier.'' Then, he looks down at his wrist watch, ''It's three in the morning, Rose.'' He adds.
I nod, ''Maybe that's why I'm hungry,'' Casually patting on his shoulder—more like in a friendly manner. My eyes wander down to see his clothes and see that he's wearing a suit and tie.
Without me realising, I am frowning at him which causes him to look down at his clothing and look back up at me, ''I came back from work.'' He answers my curiosity. ''You don't want an empty stomach, I can make you something to eat.'' I move slightly and he let go of my waist, putting both of his hands in his slacks' pocket.
''I think it's fine. I can just grab some snacks—''
He cuts me off by pulling my hand, making me follow him down the stairs. Honestly, I may say that I don't want him to make me something to eat but I want to. Aren't all girls like that? They say no but they want the other way—I guess I'm no different.
Once we reach the kitchen, he gestures me to sit down on the seat near the kitchen counter. He glances at my direction before standing in front of me—the kitchen counter separating us. I continue to look at him and due to the dim lights, his face seems perfectly structured. He's like goals. For no reason, one look at him and anyone could fall head over heels.
I run my fingers through my long hair; trying to reduce the awkward tension between us. He does nothing but look at me and I find that really distracting. I mean, I don't mind if a hot guy looks at me. Who would mind? But right now, I mind. ''What would you like?'' He suddenly asks.
''Are you sure you can cook?'' I ask back, earning a chuckle from him.
''Very sure.'' He replies with a smile—oh lord, can someone please stab him in the face so that it wouldn't be a distraction whenever he smiles?
Then, he moves towards the other side, taking out a frozen lasagna—and I laugh sarcastically; knowing what he meant by making me something to eat. ''You're such a good cook.'' I say, making him grin. ''Impressed.'' I add at the end.
He puts the frozen lasagna into the microwave before pressing start and turn around to look at me, ''Glad I impressed you with my cooking skills. You're not the first anyway. I kind of figured it out.'' He replies back, jokingly with the same grin from before.
I cup my cheeks and smile at him, ''No wonder. You're a ladies' man.''
Eh wait, how did we went from awkward to this? We're all laughing and chilling. Well, that awkwardness wasn't going to last forever anyway—one way or another we have to get along. He crosses his arms as he leans against the kitchen counter, ''Oh, so that's how you see me?''
''Look at you. What else should I see?'' I shrug.
''I don't know.'' He walks forward, resting his elbows on the kitchen counter near me while bending so that he could meet my eyes easily, ''Maybe how good I am in cooking.'' He points at the microwave—earning a chuckle from me.
Looking back at him, I see that he's looking at me too. The way he looks at me; somehow shows adoration, it's something that I don't get often. He blinks, looking at his wrist watch, ''You're not going to ask me how I know your name?'' He starts another topic.
My eyes widen slightly, ''Yes, I want to know.'' But knowing him, he probably did a background check on me. He's capable of doing anything—just look at him, he owns everything.
''What else? I did a background check on you.'' Figures. I thought to myself as soon as he replies. He adjusts his body, ''Looked at your name, your age... you're pretty old. I must say.'' He jokes.
I laugh, shaking my head in disagreement.
Elia does nothing but smile at me—I don't know what's in his head and I really want to know. For instance, I want to know how he feels whenever he sees me or what he thinks whenever I'm around. Is he as nervous as I am? Does he find it awkward to be around me?
I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. For some unknown reason, it caught his attention because his lips are pressed into a straight line. I immediately drop my hands on the counter; afraid if I did something wrong. Then, to my surprise, he leans in, so close that our noses are touching.
It is as if I couldn't hear anything around me. All I could hear is my own heartbeat. He continues to lean in and I close my eyes—hoping that he would end up kissing my lips. I feel his lips brushing against mine and all of a sudden, something passed through my whole body; giving me all sorts of emotion.
Before his lips could fully meet mine, the microwave interrupts us with a sound—stating that the food has fully heated. I open my eyes slowly, seeing Elia clenching his jaw and moving back slowly. He licks his lower lip before standing up and heading towards the microwave, leaving me trying to cover my cheeks from redden.
As soon as he turns around, I put my hands down, clearing my throat. ''Here.'' He says, putting the lasagna on the counter and sitting the opposite from me.
Things are getting awkward again. I blame him for leaning in. I mean, we were in that situation before and look what happened? It rained. He tried to kiss me again and look what happened? The damn microwave just finished heating the food. I guess we're not really meant to be kissing anytime soon.
Elia smiles slightly, pushing the plate slowly towards me. I smile back, ''Thanks. Aren't you eating?'' I ask, looking down at the lasagna before looking up at him again.
He shakes his head, ''You're the hungry one, not me.'' Then, he runs his fingers through his thick hair before taking his phone out and scrolling with his thumb. Keeping quiet, I continue to eat my food without looking back up at him—it's not even necessary to look at him for a long time.
All of a sudden, we both look up after hearing the front door unlocking. I hold tightly onto the spoon; quite shocked myself. Why am I reacting this way? I thought. As for Elia, he peeks down the hall before glancing at my direction, ''Stay here.'' He says, making me nod as a respond.
He disappears from my sight and I start to feel slightly worried. For some reason, there has got to be someone unlocking the front door. Someone that isn't expected by Elia; it seems like he doesn't know anyone who's coming. Okay, especially at three in the morning, not really visiting hours, don't you think?
I hear someone chuckling and I couldn't hold myself back by staying here so I walk down the hall, heading straight to the living room. I stop walking as I see a familiar man standing exactly at the front door, smiling at Elia. He looks around for awhile, eyeing the whole house before looking back at him. Of course, I've seen him before. In one of the pictures while I was busy exploring the house. Is he the older brother?
''What are you doing here, Elis?'' Elia asks. I can't really see his expression because his back is currently facing me.
Elis smiles, revealing his dimples before breathing out, ''Is that how you're supposed to greet your brother?'' He replies, ''For god's sake, Elia, it has been ten years. Don't you miss me?'' I notice the sarcasm in his voice.
He looks at me for a second before looking at me again—somehow surprised to see me here; because he doesn't even know me. Is it odd to find someone else in the same house and just looking back at you? Definitely. I swallow, feeling slightly uncomfortable. Why is he looking at me like that? I suddenly thought.
Within seconds, he looks back at Elia, ''Found someone to accompany your loneliness?'' He says, walking towards Elia but his eyes are still on me—somehow stating that he doesn't like me here.
Elia pushes him slightly by the shoulder and he smirks, shaking his head, ''Oh, I missed you too, little brother.'' He says, mocking. For some reason, he won't stop looking at me but he's not looking at me in a way that would make me think of him as disrespectful—he's just looking at me in a way that I find it uncomfortable.
''Si sta lasciando.'' Elia says, his voice strong and determined. ''What were you thinking, Elis?''
Elis shrugs, ''Per vostra informazione, questa è la mia casa.'' He replies. Without me realising, I have been eyeing him the whole time. Eyeing his face, mostly because I find that he has more of a rough look—which somehow matches the way he acts right now.
That's how you can see the differences between them. Elia is more of a mysterious yet there isn't any bad vibe coming from him but then again, I don't even know him—this is what I think and this is what I could comprehend. While Elliot is joyful and outgoing—there's barely anything that bothers him. As for Elis, he seems mysterious. That's all I can say.
''Ma non più.'' Elia states.
''That's very kind of you.''
''Do you think that you can just come and act like nothing happened?!'' Elia raises his voice which is clear enough stating that he's angry. He doesn't like tolerating with Elis; clearly, he's asking him to leave. ''For fuck's sake, you were gone for ten years! You should just be dead by now, you shouldn't have come back.''
Elis looks directly into Elia's eyes as he clenches his jaw, ''You fucking know why I left.'' I hide myself behind the wall, so there's some sort of conflict between them? It feels odd knowing that there's something wrong going on. I mean, I'm a freaking stranger! A stranger that Elia brought into his house. I'm nothing more than that.
''You left because you're a coward.''
''Fuck you.'' Elis says and I hear him throwing something onto the ground. My heart somehow skips a beat as I slowly peek next to the wall; wanting to see what's going on. From the side, I can see Elia clenching his jaw in anger while Elis looks at him in dissatisfaction.
''Leave.'' Elia says. I watch as Elis walks right next to him, glaring before walking up the stairs and disappearing down the hall. Obviously, men and their egos. From what I just saw, it took me awhile to realise that Elia is actually the second child instead of the first. Yes, he's an adult but he seems like he's carrying a lot more burden than Elis.
He sighs and from behind, I can actually see that he's stressed out. I turn around, making my way towards the kitchen—not really wanting to make him feel that I was eavesdropping but I was. My eyes wander around the kitchen before landing on the lasagna, noticing how I've lost my appetite.
''I'm sorry.'' Someone says from behind, causing me to hold onto the kitchen counter as I turn around—seeing Elia standing near the wall.
I frown, ''What for?''
He shakes his head, lightly smiling, ''For that asshole.'' Then, I smile back at him—as a reply saying that it doesn't matter. He shouldn't have apologised, it's not his fault anyway that I'm here and I was somehow involved in their conversation. I see him looking down at his wrist watch before looking back up at me, ''It's almost four, I think you should get some rest.''
Nodding, I walk towards him. To my surprise, I hold onto him and slowly place the side of my face on his chest—hearing his heartbeat. I don't know what has gotten into me but it just feels like he needs someone to comfort him. Within seconds, I feel one of his hand on my back, pulling me a bit closer to his body.
Closing my eyes, I actually enjoy being near him. Somehow, my body fits perfectly with his—like he was made to hold me. I guess it's just my imagination but it feels good to dream sometimes.
Hearing his heartbeat calms down and I can't help but notice that they are beating a little bit fast.
As I pull myself back, I see him looking down at me but I just smile and walk out of the kitchen—leaving him there. That could've been embarrassing if he pushed me away so let's just be glad that he didn't. I thought as I keep on walking up the stairs, my mind won't stop thinking about Elia.
I immediately stop myself from moving as soon as I see Elis standing near the glass window, down the hall. From behind, I could've mistaken him for Elia—they are both well built. I eye his every movement, his every action, seeing that he's actually smoking a cigarette which is a bit odd. Who smokes in their house?
''Staring is highly impolite.'' He says, breaking the silence between us.
My heart skips a beat—surprised that he caught me staring. Was it too obvious? I clear my throat as I see him turning around, walking towards me until we're close enough yet we still have a lot of space in between. He blows out the smoke, making me frown at him in discomfort, ''What's your name?'' He asks.
I eye his face—even in the dark, I can clearly see his features. His brown eyes, his thick yet defined brows, his nicely shaped nose and lips and his defined jaw. He continues to look at me; not bothered by the fact that I'm not even answering his question. Slowly, I blink, ''Rose.'' I answer.
He holds his cigarette down, ''That's a beautiful name.''
All of a sudden, he continues to talk, ''I can tell that you're starting to trust him. You don't even know him, you don't know what he does for a living, you don't know what he did in the past and you surely don't know anything about him. Why are you here anyway?'' From the look he's giving, I know that what he said is true.
''Says the brother who disappeared for ten years.'' I reply, looking straight into his eyes.
Elis chuckles before licking his bottom lip, ''Maybe he was the reason I left.'' He says, making me furrow my eyebrows in confusion. ''Like I said, Rose—'' He adds, caressing the side of my cheek with the back of his hand, ''—you barely know anything about Elia Dominic Morello.''
My body shivers at the sudden contact and I immediately push his hand away—receiving another chuckle from him. Ignoring him, I quickly walk down the hall, heading straight towards my room. Glancing one more time at Elis, I see that he's also looking back at me. There has got to be something going on between them but I really don't want to get myself involved.
Whatever Elia did in the past, whatever he does now, it's none of my business. Elis shouldn't have said that to me—I have no right to know. He has no right to bad mouth about his own brother. Yes, he's right, I barely know anything about Elia but from what I see, he's not a bad person. Yes, there's something about him, I can't deny that.
He paid one million dollars just to get me out of that shitty place. Why would anyone want to waste one million dollars for a prostitute like me? I'm worthless. I was worthless since the day Gonzales and his gang members found me—there's nothing special about me.
I don't remember my parents, my family, myself before I was found. I could've just killed myself, it would have been easier. Everything would have ended sooner. All those pain that I went through, I wouldn't have felt them but those pain also made me strong. I continue on my life because I know that it's not worth giving up.
I may have a fucked up life but giving up isn't a choice.
It looks like I'm not only trying to figure out about Elia but I'm also trying to figure out about myself.