Akira went about naked, turning up the heater and turning off the light. After that, he came back to me and pulled the blanket over us. Our yukatas lay on the floor beside us. The sex washed away the unsettling feeling that our conversation left. His heat and his kisses were more than comfort.
"I enjoy what I'm doing now," Akira said after a stretch of silence, lying on his side, facing me.
"That's good." I lay on my side too.
Our gazes met. His eyes were stormy but alert. They were blacker in the darkness. He seemed pensive. His lips were pursed, and he had a faraway look. If I weren't being presumptuous, I'd say he was sad.
"That's good," I repeated and put a hand on his cheek. "It's hard to find something you'd enjoy doing."
Akira covered my hand with his and leaned to it, closing his eyes. He breathed out. "You're right."
"What about you, Reiko-senpai?" He opened his eyes. "Why'd you choose law?"
"Hmm." I took back my hand, lay on my back, and stared at the ceiling. I felt him do the same.
"Do you hate my question?" he asked.
"It's not that." I grabbed his hand, interlocking it with mine, placing it on the top of my stomach. "It brings back a handful of bad memories."
"We don't have to—"
Tilting my head towards him, I cut him off. "You see, my father only agreed to let me moved out of the house if I got into the University of Tokyo. He didn't believe I could get in."
Akira took back his hand. My heart sank. Was my confession too heavy for him? Before I could mull over and regret it, he slid his arm under my head.
"Continue." He grinned. "I love it when you talk like this."
"Oh, really?" I chuckled, snuggling closer to him, tracing shapes on his bare chest.
"Did your father hate law too?" He grabbed my hand. "Stop it. I'm ticklish."
"You're no fun." I blew on his neck, and he shivered. Before he could scold me, I said, "No. I picked randomly. I didn't want to be a doctor, or a nurse, or a scientist, or an engineer. I'm not that really good at math either. I was only desperate to get out of the house."
"How do you feel about it now?" he asked.
"Law? It's okay." I stared at the mole behind his ears. "My house? It's been the same."
"Were you against your father remarrying?" He gazed down at me and tensed. His lips puckered. "I—you…"
I patted his chest. "I was actually happy and relieved about it."
Exhaling, Akira began stroking my head. "Don't you miss your dad?"
"Sometimes." I hugged him, fighting the yawn. "Mina has a son from her first marriage. She and Dad have a new daughter as well. I don't belong there."
Akira groaned then a choked laughter came out from him.
"What?" I glared at him.
"I'm sorry." He looked downcast, but his lips twitched.
"Spit it out," I said.
"I was going to say something, but it sounded cheesy and out of line." He pressed a kiss on my forehead. "I apologize, Reiko-senpai."
I pouted. "You're disillusioned."
"I'm not." He huffed. His body rippled, shaking my hug off.
"I was joking. Stop moving." I shot him a fake glare, biting my lips. "Or I'm kicking you out of this blanket."
"Hey!" He pressed me closer to him and hugged me. "I'm not leaving even if you kicked me."
"I can't breathe," I mumbled into his chest, chuckling.
"Gods." He sighed and loosened his hold, pressing a kiss to my forehead.
We said no more after that. Akira kept stroking my head until the words we exchanged seemed far away, and I fell asleep.