"Why won't you ever show me your face, Kalen?" I asked one night.
"It's unnecessary."
I tried not to let his curt reply put me off. "Is it because you look scary and you're afraid I'll be scared off?" I started guessing. "Maybe you have a huge scar across one eye. Or is half your face is marred. That's okay, I'll still accept you however you look like." I declared, making an exaggerated sweeping gesture with my arm.
He made an amused sound and I glared at him from across the bed. "Did you just snort at me? I'm using my imagination since you're not showing me. Is your face top secret?" I huffed.
"So curious, even for a human," he said dryly.
"Showing your only friend what you look like won't kill you." I assumed by now he'd closed an eye to me self-proclaiming myself as his friend.
"Alright."
I bolted upright in bed at this unexpected answer. "What did you say?"
In two strides, he crossed the distance between us, leaning over the bed so his face was inches from mine. One arm supported his weight on the bed while the other reached behind me. My heart skipped a beat. "Wait, what are y-"
"Drawing the curtains, dummy. Didn't you want to see my face?" Just as he said that, a shaft of silvery light gently illuminated my room. Shadows I had never noticed before dissipated, withdrawing back into dark corners before vanishing. Were those under his control?
My attention was brought back to the person in front of me. Dressed in a black button down and dark pants, he had sharp black eyes that seemed to burn with something in their depths, a chiseled jaw, dark sweptback hair. His expression was cold and aloof, like an ice king, but his mouth was set in a wry smile. He was everything I'd imagined and nothing I'd imagined, all at once. He looked more human than I'd thought. And he was so good-looking. I opened my mouth to make a smart comment but no words came out.
"Satisfied?" he asked dryly.
"I guess," I dropped his gaze. Suddenly, I didn't know how to talk to him. Seeing him like this made things feel more real. I also had a crippling shyness and lack of self confidence talking to beautiful people. "Why do you look so human?" I fumbled for something to say as I tried to unsuccessfully wriggle away from him.
"I have many other forms," he shrugged, casually trapping me with his other arm. "Where do you think you're going? You couldn't stop staring before I revealed my face."
"That's not true," I spluttered. "I never stare."
"Then is this face too hideous for you to feast your eyes on?" The same wry smile, it was driving my heart mad.
"You'd make a good-looking human," I admitted reluctantly. "I can't talk to good-looking people. I don't feel good enough." I looked down, wringing my hands. This was probably the most honest statement I'd made so far.
"Avery."
"Yea?" I didn't look up, trying to quell the sudden rush of emotions.
"Avery." He shifted closer, using one hand to trap my jaw, coaxing me to look up. My brown eyes met his dark ones. There was something burning in their depths that I had never seen before. "Don't ever say that again. You are enough." He paused. "You're beautiful."
I'd always remember how he was the first person to tell me that.
-
27 March 2016, Sunday.
It's funny how one small thing someone does can either make or break your day. One "hey, Freak." can tip my day off the scale to be one of the worse days ever.
No one ever has kind things to say about me. To my parents, I'm lazy, slow, useless, a procrastinator. To my so-called best friends, I'm just an ugly, pimply friend with greasy bangs and a boring personality.
And yet, last night, Kalen told me I'm beautiful. I'm enough, he said. Even if he didn't mean it, I can't stop thinking about it. He doesn't know how much that means to me. After I thought he'd left, I cried harder than I'd ever cried in a long time. Why did the words I want so much to hear, from my parents and friends, have to come from a non-human, near stranger I'd befriended? I was touched to tears, yet conflicted. I don't know how to feel about this.