A soft thud. The light tugging of the sheets. A blanket draped over my exposed body, adding just a hint of warmth. Then, for the longest time, it was near silent.
Only the sounds of our drumming hearts pounded on, magnified by the enveloping stillness, or perhaps it was just my own racing thoughts. Fearing that he would change his mind, I clamped my eyes shut, pretending to be already deep asleep.
His breathing gradually slowed to an even tempo, one that seemed more than natural. Was he asleep? Even if that was the case, I didn't dare to accidentally wake him up again. He wasn't forceful by any measure and more considerate than I could have hoped for, but the thought of being wed to such uncertainty still made me uneasy.
To not consummate a marriage on the day of the wedding certainly spelled bad fortune, but judging from how he visited me at Princess Leping's manor despite warnings, he didn't seem like one to care. He was still a mystery, almost like a self-contradictory character molded from various stories that were compulsorily forced into one.
For someone who usually sleeps on her side, lying on the flat of my back was the most uncomfortable position. But as I tried turning, even the slightest sound from shifting around rumbled like thunder. It was almost as if the bed protested from any notion of movement as it groaned with even the smallest sense of tremors.
The night seemed to drag on indefinitely, and each minute appeared to become more like an hour. So I stayed there, unmoving, not daring once to test my theory. And time continued its terrible curse as the candles burned on…
Blinking, the first thought that crossed my mind was that the candlelight burned my very eyes. It was surely too bright.
"Awake?" A lazy voice sounded, and every muscle in my body tensed involuntarily. It was almost as if a giant bucket of water suddenly dumped on me, forcing any remnant of sleep to go away. With it, the moments from last night came rushing back, reminding me fully of its awkwardness and the like.
Luckily, he was already nearly fully dressed, a plain and unadorned purple robe in place of the more lavish red one from before.
A crimson belt draped down his side added the final touch of color, and a small nondescript jade pendant hung on his waist. If I hadn't known he was the Prince of Jin, judging from the shabby way he dressed, even the role of court musician would have seemed too high for him.
However, though it was simple in design, from the way he wore it, there was a certain sense of richness and royalty. Perhaps it was the way that he stood without any hunching to his back or his serene expression.
"At this rate, we're going to be late to serve tea to Father Emperor and Mother Empress." He said, motioning to me. Looking down, I found myself wrapped almost like a roll inside countless layers of blankets that I somehow amassed overnight. Peeking out from under the covers, I tried to waste no time in dressing myself.
A partnership was a partnership after all. How could the actress possibly be late to her very first screening?
Tugging on the elaborate knots, more than anything, I wished that my dress could be as simple as his. At home, since I had to be out by dawn every day to collect the dew and herbs, I learned to put on my robes at record times. But ever since taking on this title as Princess of Liang, the process has been a much lengthier one, even with the help of multiple servants.
Strangely enough, the tent was empty, not a single maid in sight.
"Here." A look of amusement was visible across his face as he handed me a lilac-colored outer robe. Great. It was almost as if he was finally done seeing me make a fool out of myself. Wasn't he the one that was the master actor? Surely he shouldn't have so easily risked being late.
I immediately got to work. He occasionally handed me a belt or offered to hold a part as I was putting on another, but with this simple robe, his help was not essential. The gesture was appreciated though I suppose.
No, I couldn't think of him as such. He was my husband. No, that word sounded awful in this case. Ally suited our relationship much better. He wanted the favors, and I in return sought the wellbeing of my country. This would work. At this point, I wasn't quite sure if I was just trying too desperately to convince myself.
The last piece slid together. All I needed now was to do my hair. For the Emperor and Empress, a reasonable one would suffice, I supposed.
I tried to avoid glancing at him from the reflection in the bronze mirror, but somehow, my gaze was constantly drawn in that direction. Focus, I told myself. You need to make a good first impression as a daughter-in-law. A bit unwillingly, I retracted my gaze.
"Here, add this for now to your hairstyle. If you go with what you have now, Mother Empress will surely think you are disrespecting her with your lack of effort," he coached me, a wooden hairpin suddenly appearing in his slender fingers. Where it came from alluded my knowledge. It was almost like magic as he fished it from thin air. "It is crucial that you are not lavish, but they also stress respect through noticeable gestures."
Bending behind me, he undid my hair, parting it to either side. Stroke by stroke, he ran the comb through it, trying to avoid tearing through any knots. His touch was gentle, nearly too gentle to belong to a man. Picking up a sizeable number of strands, he wrapped it around the back before looping it around again.
What was he doing? I wanted to ask, but a voice inside me told me to just believe in him.
In less than a few minutes, a fashionable yet not eye-catching hairdo took shape, safely secured by the wooden hairpin. Despite the short amount of time that it took him, it certainly looked like a masterpiece that took a few people to design over the course of an hour, every bit showing consideration.
"How?" His work rivaled that of the most skilled maids, and I couldn't help but exclaim with a newfound shock. Who was he really?
He only shrugged, casting it off as if nothing had happened. "A'Wu used to cry a lot, and the only way she would calm down was when someone did her hair. Mother… Mother Empress was always busy with court affairs, my sisters were much older, and Crown Prince had his studies. So naturally, the task fell to me." He gazed off into the distance, peering past his memories as a near outsider, somehow seeming removed from such a personal interaction.
If he hadn't just done that in front of me, I would have definitely thought that he was speaking about a different person.
"Are you scared of pain?" He asked out of the blue.
I shook my head, a bit concerned, but he turned away anyway, grabbing the blade that sat there from yesterday.
Without any hesitation, he rolled up a bit of his sleeves and brought the blade to the underside of his arm. A trickle of red ran down his fingertips, dying the before-white sheet a scarlet red.
"There," he grinned. "Consider the marriage consummated."