There were rumors spreading all over the school society.
Gossips were everywhere along with shocks and surprises.
Even I was shocked.
I called him immediately.
There was no delay between the ring.
He answered it immediately.
And then out of the blue...
"Let's break up." he said.
I almost dropped my phone and got hanged from what he had said.
"I- I don't understand." I told him.
"It means let's break up you faggot." he said.
He dropped the call.
I was left hanged.
I was dropped hanging.
I was staying still.
Not knowing what to do.
I am feeling pain and fear.
What just happened?
Yesterday, we were still happily eating.
But now, just because of a ruckus, this happened.
Should I approach him?
Or should I just think of myself?
All these thoughts were giving me headaches.
That is because I never wanted to think of what my future would be.
I just want everything to flow smoothly.
But it looks like I can't help thinking about it.
I hate it.
I hate myself.
I hate this.
I hate everything.
I want to be alone.
I rushed towards outside the school and decided to run over somewhere peaceful and quiet.
I run and run until I found a place.
It was a small hill beside a park.
And on top of it was a lonely tree.
I went at its back and I lied my body down.
I looked upon the sky.
I gazed as each stars grow in numbers continuously.
I wonder if ever these stars had ever felt like they are lonely.
Or atleast, do they even feel something?
I slowly closed my eyes.
Trying to feel everything around me.
Including the stars.
The skies.
The air.
But I don't find myself falling asleep any second.
Instead I felt something getting near me.
"Someone's lonely today." a person said.
I was too tired from everything, but I tried looking at the person.
From the voice, I've had a clue who might it be, but I still looked at the person.
It was Men.
"Hey." he said.
"How long have you been here?" I asked.
"Longer than when you've been here." he said.
"I see." I replied.
Then there was a moment of silence that wrapped around us.
"You must be disappointed." he said.
"Or ashamed rather." he continued.
"I have nothing to say." I said.
He smirked.
"It's been awhile since we have talked to each other." he said.
I didn't say anything.
"And who would've thought that our next topic would be about you and your guy." he said.
"Don't you have any other business to care?" I said.
"There is only one in line, it is you." he said.
"How do you feel?" he asked.
"I have nothing to say." I said.
"Nothing will change if you're going to be like that." he said.
"Who would've thought that a punk can be this thoughtful sometimes?" I said.
"This punk only cares about the peiple deserved to be cared. Nonetheless, they're worthless." he said.
"I am hurt." I replied.
"It's obvious." he said.
Then I didn't answer back. I wrapped the whole conversation in silence.
"You'll move on." he said.
"How do you know that?" I replied.
"I just knew it." he said.
"This is getting pointless." I said.
"You'll see." he said.
"How are you?" I asked him.
"Your cousin stopped stepping on my life." he said.
"You missed him don't you." I said.
"He's annoying." he said.
"Annoyingly missing." I said.
"Shut up." he replied.
Then we were once again wrapped in silence.
"Maybe I do." he said.
I had let him talk.
"He's too caring." he said.
"Fragile." he continued.
"But we're hopeless." he said.
I looked at him again.
"What do you mean?" I asked him.
"He answered Joshua." he said.
"Joshua likes him too?"
He nodded.
He let out a cigarette box and tried offering me some.
"I don't do that." I said.
"The last time I have ever saw you smoked was when you had problems with your family." I continued.
"What are you pointing?" he asked.
"You must've missed him alot." I said.
He didn't answer.
He just smoked.
"You know sometimes, when people got hurt, it only teaches them a lesson." he said.
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"You know what I was pointing, but you're ignoring it." he said.
He is right.
I am ignoring it.
The point that I and Blake were totally hopeless from the start.
"I am tired." I said.
He stood up and aimed for my hands.
"I'll take you home." he said.
I grabbed his hands but he let loose of it.
"What the hell?" I said and he laughed.
"You can stand little kiddo." he said as he smiles.
"Damn you!" I said as I chase him while laughing.
Maybe after all this isn't bad.
Having a friend by my side.
Tons of them.
I went into Men's motorcycle and he drove.
He was being careless and rushy.
I hate it when he does this.
He always do this when I ride with him.
***
When we had arrived, he took off my helmet.
"You should take some rest." he said.
"You'll move on about it soon, you don't have to worry." he continued.
I looked at him and nodded.
Then slowly my worried face went gone.
I smiled at him and I walked back to my room.
It sure has been long since I have ever saw snd talked to him.
I have always been with Blake.
I almost forgot I got him.
I smiled.
I am thankful for having Men, but who would've thought that he has feeling for my cousin?
I laughed at that fact.
I smiled and cheered up.
"Lenon's life is going to be interesting." I whispered to myself.
-Lenon-
I still can't move on about what happened earlier.
Joshua likes me.
After some long time.
He managed to confess.
And he kissed me!
On the cheeks!
"Damn you!" I shouted cheerfully.
Then the neighbours went knocking.
"Hey! We're sleeping already! Be decent!' they shouted.
"Sorry!" I shouted back.
Then I smiled.
I laughed at myself.
Suddenly, my phone rang.
"Goodnight, sweet dreams."
It was Joshua's text.
I giggled.
Then I lied on my bed.
I kept on looking at his text.
I don't seem to know what to do.
What to reply.
"Goodnight." I replied.
I sighed.
"Wow." I said to myself.
My hands automatically typed something.
That's surprising.
I placed my phone down on my table beside my bed.
Then I found myself slowly falling asleep.
But my phone rang again.
I saw another text from Joshua.
"Sleep already. Goodnight, I never thought I'd miss you this bad." he said.
I giggled again.
I was about to shout.
When I remembered the neighbours knocking before.
So I kept on punching my pillow.
Punching until I had finally calmed down.
I replied him with a simple goodnight.
Then I took my rest.
But then my phone rang again.
I was doubting this time if I should check on his text again because I had already said goodnight.
So I didn't look at it.
But then my phone rang consecutively.
I was bothered.
I checked our conversation, he did not reply.
So I checked the school forum.
And there I saw something shocking.
It was Blake.
Definitely him.
Yes.
It was Blake on a video having a sex with a girl.
"What a slut." I told to myself.
The girl is totally shameless.
She targetted someone who already had a relationship with someone.
She's a pure snake.
I looked at the video carefully to see who was the girl.
It was the daughter of the dean.
Along with Blake.
Having sex.
But they were drunk.
Seemed to be totally out of themselves.
I immediately called Dale after seeing this.
At first few calls, he isn't answering.
But after my last try, he answered.
"Dale?"
"Hmm?"
"Have you seen the forum?" I asked.
"He already broke up with me." he said.
I was shocked from what I have heard.
"Did he say why?" I asked.
"I have no idea. But it may be because of that incident." he said.
He was calm, which is quite confusing.
"H- how do you feel?" I asked him.
"I am already over it." he said.
"Men comforted me." he continued.
I didn't know what to do from what I have heard.
"I- I see." I said uncomfortable.
Suddenly, my heart started beating rapidly.
I am nervous.
Wondering what should I do.
"How about you? I've heard you and Joshua are a thing now." he said.
I was stunned from what he had said.
"Y- yeah." I told him.
"So what is he like?" he asked.
"He's kind, cute, sweet and thoughtful." I told him.
"I am always happy when I am near him." I continued
"I didn't knew that he also liked me." I continued.
My mouth can't seem to stop talking when the topic becomes Joshua.
Once I had realized,
"S- sorry." I said.
"What's the sorry for? I was enjoying it." he said as he laughs.
"Hey! Since when did our topic became Joshua?" I said.
We both laughed in amusement.
"So do you know you're going to do next?" I told him.
The moment became serious again.
"I am going to ignore him." he said.
"You know problems can't be resolved just by ignoring them." I told him.
"He aint a problem. He's a nuisance." he replied.
"We're not a thing anymore. I have no intentions of keeping contact with him." he told me.
"So damn cool!" I said.
"Cool my ass. Do you still have anything to say? I'm tired I want to take my sleep." he said.
"No... sorry for disturbing you. Bye." I said as I drop the phone call.
I was disturbed after I have dropped the phone call.
Did Men really comforted Dale?
Somehow, some parts inside me is saying...
Saying that I still like Men.
Even though I shouldn't.
I love Joshua too.
They are brothers.
I have no idea on what to do.
I am so confused.
I placed my phone beside my desk and continued sleeping again.
This time, I was sure I am taking my sleep.
***
After classes had ended, I immediately went down to the school grounds.
Joshua texted me saying he'll fetch me here so I waited.
I waited on a corner.
I kept on checking on my phone to see if whether Joshua had texted or not.
It's not that I am being impatient.
But I'm the same as ever.
I don't fit in the crowd.
I am still shy.
For the last time, I decided to check my phone.
Perfect timing, Joshua had texted me.
"I'm finished with my works, I'm on my way to fetch you." he said.
I waited still due to what he had texted me.
While waiting, I didn't realize that a group of seniors were walking towards me.
One of them grabbed my wrists.
"Hey there little fella." he said.
"Mind lending us a hand?" he said.
Suddenly, his face was slowly reaching mine.
I can't move.
I am stunned.
I can't do anything.
I am afraid.
God, someone please help me.
His face slowly reached towards my neck.
The guy sniffed and licked it.
After he stopped, I closed my eyes.
My body feels so uncomfortable.
My whole body is shaking, and can't seem to do anything.
The group of people infront laughed.
They took a photo of me.
But then someone slapped the senior's hand from mine.
My wrist became swollen.
I slowly opened my eyes, looking at who could that possible be.
"Assholes." the guy who had saved me had said.