When I turn 4, my study begins.
It should be easy for me since I have learned these lessons before. But because it's really easy for me it troubled me.
I was born from the Royal Knight family, it is my destiny to be a knight since I born as a man, yet, because of my genius (lucky) brain taking action without thinking, my whole family taking a consider about my future career to be a knight.
Well, if I had a genius son that had an equally intelligent as a royal family, I too will consider my son's jobs in the future, since, it's rare for a mere people to have the same intelligence as a royal family child.
"don't you think he should be an aristocrat instead of a knight?" said mother to my father that looks puzzled, he can't argue with that since I'm too smart (lucky).
"But if he becomes one of an aristocrat, who will inherit our family title? we can't change our role from a knight to an aristocrat"
The problem is simple though, just make another son then our family will have two titles and moreover, we will instantly rich, I can't say it loud though.
My mother sighed, she glanced at me, "we should ask him"
This is what troubled me, I can never answer mother questions since I have to think about how my fate will end if I chose one of the options.
If I become an aristocrat, will my future change? that a big question. But whatever I will become, surely I will meet Prince Edward even though I become an aristocrat.
I have two options, to be Prince's knight or become his counselor.
When I became a knight in the past, I died by being falsely accused, the prince thought I want to kill him and then I will rule the kingdom, even though I never think to rule this messed up kingdom I still wrongly accused, it sucks, my life sucks thank to the bitch he loves though.
Let me think if I become his counselor.
If being a knight kill me, at least maybe by becoming a counselor won't kill me, but what if I got falsely accused again?
There are two possibilities if that happens, killed or expelled from the kingdom, but the biggest possibilities are being killed again by the prince since he felt 'betrayed' because I was his closest person.
If I think again, the problem why I got falsely accused was because the bitch felt jealous of me since I was Edward's closest friend and the only friend he had, so the problem was because of my relationship with Edward.
Then I cannot become his counselor since an emperor and his counselor should have a close relationship to trust each other well.
Then the problem is the trust again, huh.
In the past, Edward really put his trust in me, we even sleep together in the same bed, but because I got wrongly accused, he's no longer trust me and felt betrayed even though the truth is I never betray him.
But it will be a problem too if he doesn't trust me that much, I can never be his knight or counselor.
Even if couldn't take revenge, I should survive this time, I don't want to die a pitiful die.
Should I become his knight again? at least with me being a knight he won't trust me as much I become a counselor, the relationship between us will be just a bodyguard and the master, not more.
That's means I should be a knight once again. Because the end result won't be bad as much as a counselor.
I glanced at mother, "mommy"
Mother smiled at me, "what is it, honey? have you decided?"
Stop with those questions, mother, I have decided.
"I want to be a knight" I answered
I can see how my father's eyes brightened, his face glowed since I said I want to be his successor, though mother's face kind of sad, well, it can't be helped, since mother's family side was an aristocrat, so at least she wants her child to be one of the successors of her bloodline.
Sometimes I want to tell my mother to just make another child so we can have two titles for this household, but it's not appropriate for me to say that.
If I think it again, If mother had another son, would the future change? since I was the youngest one.
By the way, I have an appropriate way to say that to mother, isn't it?
... let's change the future a little.
"mommy"
My mother responded she put her best smile although she still disappointed.
"can I have a brother?" that way your dream child will come true.
Mother's eyes brightened, she looks like she just got enlightenment, she smiled at me, her face is saying 'what a brilliant idea you have there'. "oh my, so you want a little brother, huh?"
Isn't it you that wants a son again?. Well, I will just nod to her.