Woody Allen said:
"Is sex dirty? Only when it's being done right."
It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better ... while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.
"Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's one of the best."
"Sex between a man and a woman can be wonderful, provided you can get between the right man and the right woman."
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Whats the difference between a regular toad and a horney toad?
A regular toad croaks "Ribbit Ribbit" while a horney toad croaks "Rub-it Rub-it"
What's the difference between condoms and coffins?
They both hold something stiff but one's coming and one's going!
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A man went to a doctor to treat his baldness. The man didn't had a single hair on his head. The doctor told him there are three ways before you.
1. Try acupuncture...It will be painful and I can't guarantee you 100% satisfaction.
2. Try Homoeopathy...That too may not work for this 'great head'.
3. This method is the surest one...Apply female secretions on your head, definitely you will get rid of your problem."
Satisfied, he was about to go and then he noticed that the doctor is also having a 'mirror head'.
He asked the doc ,"why don't you try this method?"
Doctor snorted, "I may not have hair on my head, but can't you see that I am having a hell of moustache...!!!