Telegraph Gone Haywire
A broken down young man with job of travelling made an appointment with a
Psychiatrist on emergency.
On Psychiatrist's couch he started turning left and right, crying, and venting his fiasco, “Doc, I had to go make this big sale out of town on job," he narrated to the doctor, "and I sent a telegram to my wife that I would be coming home one day earlier on Thursday instead of Friday"?
He continued, "And when I returned home earlier, dying to catch up with all the missed sex times with my wife, I threw off all my clothes, and went straight into my bedroom nacked screaming 'honey', and guess what, I found her in bed screwing my best friend! Not only I have been without sex all these times but the shock of my friend getting gratifying instead of me is killing me."?
The man then broke down into uncontrollable tears.
The solution of all mentality, the expensive doctor considered the problem with a gravity for a couple of minutes to justify his fees, then said, "You know what I think, May be she never got your telegram."
----------
Whale of a Tale
Willie the Whale and his whale girlfriend, Monica, are swimming happily through the ocean when they come upon a boat. On seeing the boat, Willie says, "Hey, I've got a great idea! Let's swim up under that boat and blow out really hard through our blowholes!"
Monica says, "Oh, I don't know..."
"Come on, it'll be fun, come on, just this once!", says Willie.
Monica agrees and they swim up under the boat and blow out, capsizing the boat and sending hapless sailors into the briny blue.
As they are swimming away, Willie says, "Wow, that was fun, wasn't it? Hey! I've got another idea! Let's swim back there and eat all the sailors!"
To which Monica, exasperated, replies, "Look, I agreed to the blow job, but I'm not swallowing any seamen."