Still shaking violently she looked around at her surroundings. It was more like a large hall having dust everywhere. Not being able to stand in her grief anymore she sat on the floor sobbing. She worried about him coming or ask her more questions or fear if he would beat her.
She felt cold with all the things he did to her. He looked insane not listening to any of her pleads. She tried to control her breathing but shivered a little on the thought of confronting him again.
Oh, God, no, what just happened? Or maybe his anger would be dissipated and he won't say a thing. How much she wanted this latter scenario to be true. Hours passed but he never showed up. She didn't even listen to any movement outside the door.
Maybe he left for his office. She thought. Her curiosity about this notorious South wing was increasing but she told herself to stay away from the things.
A set of stairs at the far corner was drawing her in. Thinking he might won't be coming anytime soon she started roaming around. And in hope of finding a place to sit she started taking the stairs down. Coming down she found a spacious floor and large windows on her right gave her a beautiful view of that broken fountain she liked the most.
She could feel the sadness roaming around. Like this place has secrets deeper than her own wounds. Moving to more of her right she came across a hallway having three rooms. The doors had a layer of dust. And though walls and furniture looked expensive they were filled with tons of dust and in need of maintenance. She tried and found all of the rooms locked.
Time passed and it was almost evening when she started looking at the things removing their covers a little. Or sometimes worry about the situation she found herself in. She was thankful that she didn't mention about pills.
Thinking all of this she uncovered a picture of a couple. She was only trying to see it carefully so she didn't have to put the cover back but her curiosity made her remove the whole sheet making her look at a large frame showing a very young Noah in a basketball court kissing a girl in his arms. They look so much happy, content and whole. Just like Addison and Caleb used to look. Perfect. And So, much in love.
The girl in the picture was tall and beautiful. Having long brown hair and high cheekbones.
Her throat felt things. She knew it must be some old memory of his and tried to tell herself that she doesn't love him but it still hurts. Tears filled her eyes. It wasn't in her to look at the picture anymore so she took the stairs up and waited for him to open the door whenever he decides to.
I am just extra. Wherever I go I am just an extra piece. She might come back one day and he will leave me for her. And why the hell on the earth he wants an heir from me? Why doesn't he go to the girl he had all this wing locked up for?
But? Do I love him? No! I am only with him because I feel protected with him?
Protected! seriously?
She looked at the door that was locked. Protected my foot! She muttered. You need to get out of here. Like right now. You just can't sit here and wait for him to beat the shit out of you. But I don't know the world outside. People outside are more cruel and vicious. At least he cared about me. He is abusive but not always. Ugghhh!!!
She pulled her hair out in frustration. She knew she needed help but also knew she doesn't have anyone in her life she can trust besides her husband Noah Miller.
So, she waited until the darkness engulfed everything and didn't know when she dozed off. But next felt herself being lifted up. Rubbing her eyes she found Noah with a stoic face. But his perfume was able to make her nerves relax. He didn't seem angry and somehow she knew that he had forgiven her for all the mistakes.
Closing her eyes she rested her head to his chest. But got startled when he threw her on the bed. Looking around she found herself in her room and was still taking in her surroundings when he left.
Why he didn't take me to his room? She thought. And almost ran after him and saw him going to the kitchen. He was about to start making the dinner when she hesitantly offered standing at the door, "I will do it."
"No, thanks." He curtly replied.
"I didn't know....." She tried to say but was cut off with him roaring.
"You didn't know? I don't fu*king care! Millions! You stupid whore! You had cost me millions. She had my studies and three other places in my house bugged."
He threw the glass he was holding to the floor making her shivered to her core.
"Oh! But you are so stupid and dumb." He spatted with sarcasm. "How you would know what is it? So, the last thing I want is to see your face right now."
And just before he could say anything else she went to her room and cried all night long. He didn't come as she hoped. Like he always did. Like he was supposed to.
In the morning she went into the kitchen to make a good breakfast for him but the moment he came down he went to his living room and stayed busy until it was his usual time to leave. The same thing happened at dinner time. At 9 pm when it was time for his coffee she stayed in the kitchen for his call but it never came instead a maid came to make some coffee for him.
Five days passed and guilt was stabbing her every day. She started having nightmares again and would wake up at three in the morning with a sweaty face and labored breathing. She was getting back to the times she wanted to forget. Every night Isabella was there to beat her or the girls were picking on her. She would call Addison for help but she wasn't listening.
So, in the midnight, she would go to the kitchen and try to make something special for him while she couldn't shake away the feeling that her past will haunt her soon.
She lost her interest in reading magazines or coloring. She would wait on the dining table after making breakfast or dinner and wonder if he decides to come. But on the fifth day, she sneaked into his room after he left for the office. Getting into his closet she looked for his perfume. There were three bottles she checked all of them to have her favorite and used it for her pillow and everywhere she wanted it in her room before returning it to its original space. Hugging her pillow beside her she tried to sleep and catch up on all the sleepless nights. Because the last thing she wanted was her dark circles back.
Today, when he came back she was not there in the kitchen. She finally gives up trying huh? A thought crossed his mind.
It was 10 pm and he was in his study wearing a long robe only when it started pouring so hard. The windows rattled and the sound of the thunderstorm was shaking the whole house. He lit up a cigarette and looked at the rain. As it took him to the old times. Times he wished never happened.
While Sydney cowered in fear as another thunderbolt roared. Her heart beats violently. She could swear that she saw some man's shadow on the windows or something crawling out of her bed. All of these things were taking her to Blake mansion again where once she was so battered that she couldn't leave the kitchen as it rains so hard while she was always so afraid of a thunderstorm.
She sniffed on the pillow and tried to tell herself that no one can come here. There was security and that won't let anyone inside. But it was getting worse with every passing minute. She ran to her closet but even in the closet she shook badly and ends up crying hard.
It was almost twelve at midnight when he was walking to his room. But what he saw made his brows furrowed. There he saw Sydney with her head rested on his bedroom door, sleeping with a pillow in her hand that reeked of his perfume.
For the past five days, he didn't know if he was punishing her or himself. Because all he wanted to do was devour that pretty little mouth of hers. Scooping her up he took her inside his room and closed the door silently.
She felt warm, safe, and loved. Opening her eyes she found herself in his room. But he wasn't anywhere. She looked at herself to find her clothes still on.
Is he still mad? She thought.
Getting out of her bed she shoots for her room and then to the kitchen all the while seeing him busy on his laptop in the living room and got hit into the wall ahead in the kitchen.
Rubbing her head she thanked God, that he didn't saw her such clumsy act. Just like every other day she went to make breakfast for two, hoping that he would decide to come today. And also wished that her head doesn't have a bruise now.
She was pouring the coffee as his time for leaving was coming. But in an attempt to peek out of the dining room she ends up spilling the hot liquid on her right foot. She tried to muffle her scream but a sob came out. Making sure that he was still busy in his work she tried to walk past the table but a glass fell making her whimper.
She heard the footsteps and tried to compose herself. "Nothing, it's just a glass," Sydney said the moment she saw him coming to her. But he was quick to notice a tear on her cheek and her red foot that she had lifted up a little.
"It's nothing," She whispered the moment he bent down to look at her foot. Lifting her up he took her to the living room. And went to take cream for burn. When he came out he saw her blowing her burnt skin and hiccuping.
"Let me see," He said sitting at the couch and taking her foot in his hand.
"No," She whimpered the moment that cream touched her skin but felt cold and relaxed.
"This is gonna leave blisters. You should have acted fast." He said blowing her skin.
"You are getting late for office, it's nothing." She replied.
"Excuse me? You don't tell me what to do. Apparently when you don't have any brain." He reprimanded while she only sniffed and sobbed in reply.
"Come," He offered her a hand to help her to walk but then lifted her up to her room. A little pout on her lips was quite distracting like she would start crying any minute.
"Don't you dare to set your foot on the floor. Just use your extension to ask for anything. And I hope you can do this much without failing me." He said and left her all alone.
Minutes later a maid came inside carrying her breakfast. And she realized that Noah must have asked her to do this. So, she silently decided to have her breakfast.
Spending her day on the bed alone, reading magazines was difficult. She felt thirsty and didn't ask someone but went to take water for herself bare feet as wearing her slippers hurt. It sure pained a lot and blisters were bad but she had endured a lot more than this. She had done a lot of more exertive tasks while having blisters in her hands or arm. It was just taking the water for herself. Thinking that it's near to his arrival she started making the dinner.
I can't let him think that I am weak. And some blisters are enough to put me on the bed.
After making the dinner she waited for him in the dining room. He sure did come and was taking the stairs like every other day but stopped halfway. "What are you doing here?" He asked.
"I was fine, I thought to make something for you."
"Th-that's the problem, Sydney! You don't really think ever." He announced coming down from stairs and then took a chair beside her. She cowered in fear when he held her hand because she thought he was going to hurt her but he didn't.
"Tell me, what were you thinking when you decided to make all of this or knew that you were defying my clear orders. Come on, tell me?"
He seems intimidating and she didn't know if he was really talking to her or just saying things for a simple sarcasm. So, she held her head down and stayed quiet.
"I am waiting, Sydney and you know I lack when it comes to waiting." He said monotone.
"I just wanted to do,.....do my part. These blisters were nothing I could walk around easily."
"Wow! Just because you could walk around easily you decided to defy my direct order. Should I give you a reason to put you on the bed then? Huh?" His threat made her gulp hard.
"Sorry, I wasn't thinking." She said praying he would let this matter slide.
"Yes, you were definitely not thinking because it is not, nothing. And don't you dare to tell me that you haven't put the cream on these." He hissed squeezing her hand.
A gasp from her made him let go. It was like he was sane again and got up from the chair. "I am sure you don't need my help when you already seem fine walking around. I suggest you go to your room and don't show your face for a time being."
She could notice him taking the stairs up but didn't have the courage to walk. She was scared of him. The way he talked to her. The way he made her feel just right now. He was this close to hurt me. Oh, God, don't let this ever happen.
At night she cried in her bed. Her head hurts thinking all of the possible scenarios having if she stays with him. But she was certain that she can't feel safe with him anymore. And it breaks her heart. Just in the morning, he made her feel special somehow. But now he was just a stranger she doesn't know. He was complex and she didn't have in her to solve this puzzle.
She heard the door being opened and closed her eyes and tried to control her sobs. Her breathing was erratic with all the whimpering. But next, she feels his hand over her right foot to apply that cold cream. A sob escaped her lips though how much she wanted that he doesn't know about her being up.
"I don't know how you can't rest when your foot looks like this." He huffed in disappointment. She knew this was his time to work and if he was here it means something. It means that she was important to him.
"You could have asked one of the employees to make dinner for you. Can you give me one reason, one genuine reason why you didn't." He asked, but this time he sounds considerate.
When she didn't answer he get to her side and lay beside her. She felt caged yet secured in his arms. This, this right here how he behaves I know I am going to trust him again. Trust him that he won't ever hurt me. She yelled in her brain.
"The more I think about it the more I get puzzled. Why?" He whispered against her hair.
"Why do you go to the office even if you are tired?" She questioned back.
"Do you take making food for me as a job?" He asked and waited for her reply.
"I just didn't want you to think about me as a weak person. I already failed you once." She replied.
"You didn't fail, Sydney. But remember to ask me before taking any step. Literally, any step. If you don't know about anything just ask me. Your one wrong move can end everything in a blink. Make it my business, reputation, or this relationship of ours. And,...
and I am serious about it."
She didn't answer but listened to him silently.
"I just want you to take care of yourself. Eat good and stay good. Can you do that!" He added after a minute.
"Hmm," She replied with a whimper.
"You aren't going to make anything from now on." He said and felt her go stiff.
"What?" He asked,
"Then what I will do?" She asked like she was losing her job.
"For now, try to focus on healing, have your supplements and try not to be stupid." He replied looking at her lips and leaned in to kiss them. And somehow she recalls that frame in the south wing. Is he still with her? Her mind echoed and made her froze.
"You're fine?" He asked.
"Hmm," She replied.
"Goodnight," He said and got out of the bed.
"Where are you going?" She asked and gasp with her hand on her mouth when she recalled how many times he had asked her not to question him. But to her shock he casually replied,
"I got some work."
She nodded and he left her. She hugged that perfumed pillow and tried to tell herself that everything was fine.
In the morning, she didn't get out of bed but was quick to call for a maid to prepare breakfast for them. And waited for him in the dining room.
He came down and had breakfast with her while a maid served them their breakfast.
She went to her room to see a person placing a mini-refrigerator in her room. When he left she opened the fridge to find it fully stocked.
"Is there anything you want?" She saw Noah standing at the doorframe.
"No, it's more than enough." She replied.
"Come on, there has to be something that you want." He asked again a little irritated.
For not to disappoint him she looked at the stock again and answered.
"Maybe some orange juice."
"Good," He muttered and came with a carton of orange juice and placed it in the refrigerator.
He already looked ready to leave for office or even fifteen minutes late than his usual time but was still standing in her room placing the carton in the refrigerator.
He turned to look at her and grazing her cheek said, "I expect that you listen to me and take care of yourself. Do I have your word?"
She looked at his face that looked uncertain and worried. She quickly nodded while biting her cheek. And next, found herself kissing him back with equal fervor.
The whole day went lighter than a feather. She didn't forget to apply the cream on her blisters and eat healthily. When it was near to his arrival she ordered some maids to do the arrangement for dinner and chose to wear a beige colored dress with her hair tied up in a pony.
She was coming out of her room when she found him taking the stairs but he stopped to look at her and asked, "How's your foot?"
"It's good," She answered looking at her barefoot.
"That's great. Ask someone to set the table for us." He added before leaving.
She squealed inside but didn't show and went to ask the maids to set the table and waited for him impatiently.
He came down and they had the dinner in complete silence. She went to her room afterward. But contrary to her expectations, he didn't come to visit her that night.
The next day was same but he sent a very large LCD for her to watch the t.v. Her day went extra well with all her favorite movies. She came to know more about one of the maids, name Joanne. She was in her late thirties and made some very good pizzas for her to eat. And set her room with some extra flowers and lights to make her room more lively. Sydney liked every bit of her idea. And didn't want to leave her room even for a minute.
Three days passed and somewhere she starts missing him. He was attentive to her recovery but the only thing they talked about in the last three days was her recovery and nothing else. She missed waking up in his room but didn't have the courage to get into his room without him asking.
It was Saturday and he was home working on something with his laptop while the business news channel was blowing the whole house. She got out to look at him and did that for half an hour before going to him and ask, "Would you like some coffee?"
"Sure," He replied without lifting his eyes away from the screen. She went to make two cups for coffee and picked up a magazine to read. She was still deciding what to read when she heard him calling,
"Sydney!" Leaving everything she went to the living room to hear to what he got to say but was shocked when she heard him saying,
"There's someone for you on the phone."
"Who?" She asked,
"The same person you talk to when I am not home," He said lowering his voice like he doesn't want the person to hear what he wanted to say.
In place of taking the phone, she shook her head in no but Noah was quick to put the phone on loudspeaker before putting the thing to her ear,
"Hello," She said stammering into the receiver.
"Hello, dumbhead. I hope you are ready for the upcoming test. It's in two days. My driver will be there to receive you." Noah's grandmother spoke.
Sydney, who was more focused on Noah's facial expression didn't listen to what she said and next Noah caught the phone.
"She is not going anywhere and it's far better if you stop disturbing her while I am asking nicely." She heard him say into the phone but didn't know what his grandma answered because the phone wasn't on the speaker anymore.
She feared his reaction after the call ended but he chose not to talk to her and went to his study. She waited for him at the dinner or breakfast but he chose not to appear. For a moment she wanted to barge into his room and explain to him but then she realized that it won't change a thing.
It was Sunday night and she was waiting for him in the living room as he was still not back. She worried about him because it was Sunday and wondered what work would have taken so much time. She tried not to worry much but the clock striking one in the morning was mocking her.
All she wanted was to see him fine and in one piece. So, she could sleep peacefully. After half an hour she heard the engine roaring and left to her room. Knowing that he was safe was enough for her. But even after fifteen minutes, she didn't hear his footsteps going up. This somehow made her peek out. She found him lying on the couch. Getting out she saw him sleeping on the couch in his casual clothes while he reeks of alcohol.
Waking him up looked like a bad idea so she got the covers from her room. Lower the air conditioning to his preferences and dim the lights. Taking his shoes off she was covering him when she noticed a stain of lipstick on his shirt. This is when she noticed a faint fragrance of a lady's perfume.
Even the mere thought that he was with someone made her blood froze. She wasn't able to move or even breathe. Leaving the covers there she walked to her room. Each step that she took felt so heavy. And once she was in her room she fell to the floor sobbing.
No, no, no, this is not happening. It can't be true. He can't do this. He is not like that.
She tried to tell herself but felt empty inside. She didn't have a single word to tell herself that why he won't do that to her.