Joyce walked tiredly to her place. The place she would call home for the last time since she would be leaving the place for good.
She was walking along the pedestrian when she saw the park where she talked with Jayden several time before and felt nostalgic. She went to the park to sit by herself for one last time.
All these places would carry the memory that she would cherish for the rest of her life.She sat on the bench and looked at the stars that was shining brightly in the sky. A single drop of tears fell down. She wiped it bitterly.
Everything would slowly become a distant memories. Sooner or later the wound would heal itself, the pain would numb and the memories will fade.
She smiled sadly thinking of the time she had spent with Lily by her side, who would have guess that Lily would just leave the world so suddenly. Life is really an unpredictable road with no fixed destination. Nobody has a control of their life. Destiny sometimes played a joke on us. One day, they were filled with hope and happiness, then suddenly everything could turn into despair.
She wiped her tears away, took a deep breath and said goodbye to her youth. For from tomorrow onwards, she would be a young adult. She would go to college and started a new chapter of life
Sighing to herself, she took a deep breath, got up, and started to walk back to her place.
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"Joyce"
Since Joyce was deep in thought she did not pay attention to where she was going until she heard a deep masculine voice calling her.
She looked up and saw Jayden walking towards her.
Yes, they should talk. It's time to end everything. She told herself resolutely. Thus, she stared at Jayden and slowly filled her eyes and stance with icy coldness and indifference.
When Jayden came nearer to her, he almost didn't recognize the girl standing in front of him. The girl who were energetic and full of life is replaced with this cold, unapproachable girl in front of him.
He put both his hand on her shoulder. "Why did you avoid my calls?"
"I didn't. I was busy preparing for the exam. So I couldn't get distracted" she reasoned.
"The exam was over 3 days ago. You still didn't answer my calls..." he was exasperated! "What the hell is wrong with you??!!!" He swore out of agitation.
"Nothing is wrong with me... I was just busy..." Joyce tried to remain cold and indifferent, however, the icy demeanor cracked a little when she saw how Jayden was so frustrated...
"Joyce... Please... Look at me... You promised to be frank with what you feel. No barriers. Just honesty." He pleaded with her. "Please..."
She took a dee breath, feeling her eyes started to tear up, but she stiffened her spine and held it in. It's not the time to be weak. So, she looked at him and slowly pushed his hand away.
"It is impossible for us to stay together now."
"Why?!"
"It's not you. It's me... Everytime I think of you, I'll think of Lily. I remember how hurt she was. I was reminded of how I betrayed her trust. I kept thinking how sad she was when she found out about us. I couldn't bring myself to be with you. Don't look for me again. I am talking to you to end everything." Joyce looked deep into his eyes..
"What nonsense are you talking about?!" He stared at her incredulously.
"I said, we should end this." Joyce said decisively.
"You have no feeling to me anymore? It's this easy for you to end this?"Jayden accused her.
"I would not accept this!" Jayden increased his hold on her shoulder. Joyce winced. Jayden decreased his force and tried to look into her eyes while Joyce avoided looking at him.
"Look at me and tell me that you have no feeling anymore."
She refused.
"If you really want to end this, it's the only way that I'm gonna leave you." Jayden pulled at her chin so that she'd look at him.
Joyce didn't want to hurt Jayden anymore than necessary. However, if it was what was needed then ...
"I don't like you anymore. I don't want to betray my friend for you. She may be gone, but I still feel bad whenever I see you." She stared coldly at him and looked into his eyes.
Jayden froze when he heard her. It felt like his heart cracked and broke into pieces and no glue would be able to put it back together. His heart squeezed painfully. His chest suffocated and he suddenly felt heat in his eyes.
He looked dejectedly at Joyce. "I accept it if it's what you want."
Then everything happened in slow motion. He hugged her for one last time. He looked at her face for one last look, kissed her forehead and said," Take good care of yourself. Good-bye"
He left without looking back. He finally let down his defense as the first tear dropped out from his eyes.
Looking at his retreating back, Joyce finally fell down on the floor and cried painfully letting out all the suffoacated feeling inside...
"I'm sorry... I'm sorry.... I'm sorry...." she kept on repeating the words to Jayden. But he would never hear it.
———
Joyce looked at the view outside the small window in the plane. She was leaving. She didn't know when she would be back. She looked at the views below that was getting smaller and smaller for one last time. Thank you for the memories. She said to them as she closed her eyes tiredly and slept.