"What now?"
Eric spoke up as we left Jungo's place.
We ended up with just above ninety grand from our haul.
"Now, we go to the infrastructure guild to pay our taxes."
I had to chuckle at Flora when she said that.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?"
"Nothing, it's just funny when you say we have to pay taxes. After all, you're the one who rips off everyone you meet."
I smirked at her.
"That's different.
Most commoners can't do shit when someone cheats them, except for putting a bounty on the would be thief's head.
But since said thief stole their coin, how will they pay said bounty?
Whereas if you steal from the crown, they'll send the knights - they wouldn't even send when a couple of villages was being wiped out by a monster - to hunt you down like a dog.
It's the rule all life must abide by, Never. Fuck. With. Taxes."
"Yup, that sounds about right."
It's about midday, so the streets are packed.
Vendors are selling their goods, consumers are buying said goods, and everyone else is doing what you do to kill some time.
Every time we pass a stall a vendor would scream out what their wares are, and Flora would say what it really was.
"Enchanted jewelry here! Get one, it will save your life!"
(Random vendor)
"You expect us to believe a lowborn like you knows how to enchant? Scam."
(Flora)
"I have magic imbued equipment found in the dungeon! Buy it now!"
(Random vendor)
"Dungeons only get the ability to imbue after a hundred years, ours formed fifty years ago.
So, unless you found it in an older dungeon miles away, transported it here to this backwater town to sell, all of which would mean your overhead was too much to reasonably be selling it here, you're lying and this is a scam."
"Mana and healing potions for half the cost, buy now before it's all gone!"
"There are only a couple of families that are professional mana and health potion makers, even when the knowledge was unknowingly disseminated, only those families make the good ones.
And even if you were selling one of the knock-off recipes, there's no luster at all. These are just dyed water, probably with berries from around here. Scam."
That went on for a while, and left a trail of angry people praying to their respective gods for us to be struck down by a lightning bolt.
I decided to walk little bit further from Flora.
"How did you know all of those things were scams?"
Flora laughed as she answered me.
"Because I have done every single last one of those before, and those people are butchering those beautiful scams.
I can think of a dozen lies I could have told to get some suckers to still buy."
I looked at the five-foot distance we have between us, then looked at the sky where lighting would be raining down.
I don't think I got enough distance.
_______________
Towards the center of town there's more space, and the buildings look nicer.
These are the buildings that were built when the town was first established.
We stopped in front of a building made of stone and wood.
"Let me do the talking. I don't what to go in there owing fifty grand, and come out owing a hundred."
Flora staring at us, waiting for an answer.
We just brushed past her.
"You worry too much. Taxes are fixed."
The inside is a lot more lush than I have seen so far in this world.
The seats actually have cushions sewn on them, instead of just hard wood.
Soft rugs feel great on my feet.
And...
"Excuse me, tames aren't allowed in here."
A guard came towards us running his mouth.
Before I could say anything, Flora spoke up.
"Of course, we would love to leave him outside, but you know how lizards sometimes break free of their beastmaster's control when they're too far away, and start a rampage through the streets."
"Wait, they do?!"
"Yeah, but you must have already known that.
After all, it's in the rule book just above the rule how beastmasters can take their tames inside all buildings if the need arises.
It's right in chapter thirteen, section four.
You have read the rule book, right? I'd hate to take this up with your superior."
He visibly blanched.
"I remember now! Chapter twelve... ugh... and... um... section five!"
"I think you mean chapter thirteen, section four.
Maybe I should talk to your boss, I bet he'd love to hear about this."
"There's no need for that, really! It's a big book, I just forgot.
Please, can we keep this just between us? I'll owe you one."
Flora put her hand on her chin, as if she was actually thinking about it.
"I don't know, as a noble lady it's my duty to report any dereliction of duty, and not memorizing the rules would certainly count.
On the other hand, I support those who sacrifice so much to protect us.
So, just this once, I'll look the other way."
He saluted her.
"Thank you ma'am! I owe you one."
He beat a hasty retreat.
"When did you read their rule book?"
Flora scoffed at me.
"I didn't read shit."
"Then?"
"Most rule and regulation books are large and boring, and most people here can't read.
So, the odds were in my favor that he either didn't read it, or remember most of it.
All I had to do was pretend to know what I'm talking about, and he thinks he owes me a favor for letting us bend the rules."
"Then, why did you tell him an exact chapter? When he looks it up, he'll know you lied!"
"He won't look it up.
As long as you tell people to go look it up with confidence, they'll take your word for it, and assume they're the ones in the wrong."
We shut up as we came upon one of the front desks.
The smiling lady greeted us without even looking up.
"How are you doing today? And how can I be of assistance?"
She stopped smiling when she looked up and saw me, but when she looked at the guard and noticed he wasn't going to do anything, she turned back to Flora with her smile.
"We are here to pay land taxes."
"Okay, what is the name of the property owner?"
"Flora, Jurea, Eric, and Emira."
The clerk raised an eyebrow.
"That many on the deed?"
"I know it's weird, some people have trust issues."
She was cutting us the eye as she said that.
Like I care.
All people have trust issues, when it comes to you! Or, at least, they should.
"Okay, just let me go check the records. Be right back."
She left to the back.
As soon as she left, Flora decided run her mouth at us.
"You know how embarrassing that was?! I told y'all one person was enough."
"And we told you, as long as it is one of us, sure."
Jurea shot back her reply.
"Yeah, great idea, the person who can't read, or the slave who knows basically nothing."
"What about me?"
"You're a monster, no one in their right mind would sell to a monster."
"That's racist!"
< Speciesist, it would be speciesism.>
Shut up Patty.
"You're a monster, deal with it. As soon as we pay our taxes, we'll meet up with Ethel and try to get the property ready."
She just said her name a few seconds ago!
The clerk returned.
"The property's previous owner was called Jolan, correct?"
The clerk had a 'the shit's about to hit the fan' look.
"Yes, but what does that have to do with anything? We got this property legitly!"
The clerk put up her hands.
"I'm not saying you didn't. It's just that the property has been flagged."
"What does that mean?"
"It just means that the lord wants to talk to you before anything else."
"Why?"
"I don't know, I'm just an employee."
That's code for why do I have to deal with the crazy customers? Go get the manager!
"What if we don't see the lord, what happens then?"
"Well, technically you wouldn't be able to pay taxes on said land, and they could repossess it."
Well, that's some grade A bull.
"Fine, we'll go see him."
The clerk had a relieved look on her face when we left.
__________________
"Do we really have to do this now?"
I asked Flora as we stood in front of the gate that leads into the main guardhouse, which you have to pass to enter the mansion the lord and his family live in.
"Yes, people who are in their positions hate waiting.
Instead, they like making others wait, it makes them feel powerful."
"So, do we like yell to get someone's attention?"
Eric asked.
Flora shrugged her shoulders.
"Maybe there's a bell, or something."
We all started looking around the gate, for a bell or something.
"This is stupid! What kind of idiots don't leave a bell when someone needs to get in!"
Flora yelled when we had been looking for a minute or two.
"Actually we never saw the need for one, considering there's always a guard on duty right up the hill."
Coming up from behind us was a tall guard with blue hair.
"We've been here for a couple of minutes now, if anyone could see us, they'd have opened the gate."
Instead of answering the guard just pointed at the gate.
We all turned to look just in time to see a guard running up to the gate.
He unlocked it, and pulled it open.
The blue haired guy walked up to us.
"They only open the gate for people they
know."
"Then, how do people who're new get in?"
I asked him.
"A talking lizard, that must mean you're Jurea."
He was pointing at Jurea.
She narrowed her eyes at him.
"How do you know that?"
"News travels fast, and I don't see many others with a talking lizard."
The guard who had finished opening the gate saluted.
The blue haired guy led us through the gates.
"As for the answer to your tame's question, new visitors normally set up appointments, and send known couriers to deliver their request.
Just showing up at a barons gate is a good way to die, no noble in their right mind would let strangers just walk right in."
We all stared at Flora.
"What? I don't know everything."
We stopped in the courtyard of the guardhouse.
Blue - That's what I'm just going to call him.
naming sense?> Shut up Patty. As I was saying, Blue pointed at a group of people sitting at the edge of the yard. "Y'all can wait over there with the rest of the visitors, someone will inform the baron that you are here." "Thank...." "Hey!" A girl, followed by two others, cut Jurea off while headed towards us. Blue smiled at them. "And just what can I do for you?" "How long do you expect us to sit around waiting for? Those seats are hard as rocks!" Now that I've got a good look at her, she's super pretty. Long silky black hair, big round eyes, a well shaped rear end, and an... ahem... ample bust. She looks Asian, like Jungo. "I'm sorry to hear that our seats aren't up to your standards, but if you want, you could always just sit on my face." Her face turned beet red when he said that. "What did you just say to me?!" "I said you could sit on my face, or if you don't want to do that we could always just skip straight to the sex." You could actually see her quaking in anger. "Do you even know who you dare speak to like that!" One of her friends spoke up. "You don't really need to know someone's name to have sex with them." Her friend gestured towards her with her arms. "This is the great Watanabe Minako-san! A young genus adventurer who has saved dozens of villages from monsters so far. She does your dung hole of a town the privilege of hosting her, and how is she treated? Forced to wait to get in the town's gate, forced to endure remarks by baseless rogues you call adventurers, and forced to wait on this baron!" "Well, she might be famous where she comes from, but her fame has yet to be established here. I mean saving villages is great and all, but we live in dangerous times. Those same villages probably had to be saved again the very next day after she left, so unless she built a super sturdy wall, they're probably being attacked as we speak." "She comes from the mythical land of Japan! The land of miracles!" Wait! There are other reincarnators here?! I thought I was the only one. I felt a lot of my energy leave me. Also, look around you, do you know how unlikely it is that only one race of human would be here, you are some of the most mobile species to exist. Don't worry though, you're probably the only one to piss off a goddess enough that she wants to kill you this badly.> Gee, thanks. "If this Japan is so magical, why'd she leave?" "She had no choice! She's come to provide culture to us!" Wow, this one has definitely drunk the Kool-Aid. "Ah, so she is an educated individual. So, how much extra does she cost an hour?" Without responding, Minako unsheathed her sword - which is a katana - and slashed at him. She moved so fast I couldn't even see her move, but she only ended up hit dirt. "Ha! Just like a woman. Maybe you should just stick to household chores." Minako and her friend looked over at Jurea. "Help us teach this pig a lesson." Well, looks like I'll have to kick this guy's as... "We're good." Jurea said as she started walking towards the seats. Minako's friend screamed at Jurea as she left. "You coward! You're a disgrace to womankind!" "Leave her Andrea, this will be over shortly." I felt the surge of electricity from here. She's charging up some kind of skill or other. Apparently, she didn't tick off whatever god handled her reincarnation, and they gave her a cheat skill. I ran to catch up to Jurea. "Don't you want to watch this fight?" "Why bother? It's going to be completely one sided." What? "We end this now, don't say I didn't warn you!" Her grasp on her katana tightened. "I'll try not to kill yo... guh!" Before she could finish her statement, never mind her attack, she, her friend, and the hulking dude with a giant battle axe behind them both, were all face down in the dirt unconscious. What the what?! I turned to Jurea. "You knew she'd lose? How?!" She shrugged. "Their eyes, she had complete confidence, and he was cautious. Veteran warriors are always wary of every fight, you never know what trick your opponent may have up their sleeve. Also, he's the guard captain." "How do you figure that?" "The guard at the gate saluted him." Wait, he was saluting him! Um... no one. Shut up Patty! "Sir." A red-headed guard came running up to Blue. She stopped and looked at the unconscious bodies laying in the dirt. "Seriously, Alaric why do you insist on picking fights?" Blue, I mean Alaric, crossed his arms and laughed. "Alaric!" "That's captain to you Dag, and they swung first." "And what preceded that swing? Gods above, how did you become the captain of the guard?" He showed off his pearly whites. "I like to think it's because of my sparkling personality." Dag put her pointers on her temples, and started to massage them. "Well, I had come out here to tell them that they were good to go in, but I see they are in no condition to be seen." Alaric looked at Jurea. "Well, kids it's y'all lucky day, y'all get to skip the line. Go right ahead." He was gesturing towards Dag, and the gateway leading to the baron's mansion. Dag, on the other hand, was facepalming her face while shaking her head back and forth. "My mother told my not to join the guard, and just try to find wealthy merchant to marry. But did I listen? No, I needed to be my own woman, why didn't I listen?!" Flora walked up to her. "You can have your mid-life crisis later, take us to the baron already." Dag looked up at the sky. "Gods above, please give me the strength to avoid killing someone today." She looked back at us, and waved us along as she started walking towards the gateway. "Follow me." We followed her through the portcullis, and a tunnel that had many doors leading into the guardhouse. Once through the tunnel, and another portcullis, we were on a very green yard that led to a very big mansion. It is at least ten stories high, each floor has a balcony that runs the floor's full length, on each balcony are guards that have either bows or crossbows, and above the front door - that was made of a sturdy wood - is a metal gate that can be dropped in an instant. Inside, the first room is huge, the floor is made from marble, the banisters look to be made of some kind of ivory, furs from different types of beasts hang on the walls, and to top it off the chandelier looked to be comprised of crystal with mana hearts letting off a slight magical glow. I quickly whispered to Flora. "How did this guy make his money again?" "Salt." "Salt! You can get this rich from salt?!" She elbowed me. "Quiet!" "How quaint, a talking lizard." A woman in her late teens early twenties made her way down the lavish steps of the stairs. "Who are... umph!" Flora elbowed my gut again. Dag stepped forward and bowed while presenting the woman. "Introducing the honourable lady Alyd Von Müller." She finished her descent, and stood in front of us. She is in a restrictive dress with a fur stole draped over her shoulders. Alyd glanced over us. When she looked at Eric and I she had barely concealed contempt written across her face. She quickly hid it behind a smile, but I'm used to those looks and caught it. She courtesied. "And what can I do for you?" Jurea was scratching her scalp. "I thought the baron is man, who're you?" Flora glared at her. "You idiot! The baron is a man! According to her introduction, this is obviously someone related to him!" Alyd held her hand up. "I'm his younger sister, and have been given full authority on matters such as receiving guests." Flora stared harder at Jurea. "I apologize for my party member." "It's quite alright, I can tell she meant nothing by it. Not everyone can be knowledgeable about proper decorum, how you are raised plays a big part in how... civilized you become in adulthood." Jurea either didn't catch, or chose not to react to that slight. Alyd looked at Flora. "You on the other hand, where were you raised?" Flora did a little courtesy of her own. "Xalminth, my lady. I come from the Dreyas family. I'm Flora Dreyas." Alyd had a shocked face, she then returned the courtesy. "Then, why are you here lady Dreyas? The Dreyas are the royals in that region." Royalty? That doesn't make any sense. If Flora were royalty, there wouldn't be a second she wouldn't use that to live a life of luxury. She's a money-whore through and through. "Indeed, but as you know life in the peerage can be a little restrictive, so I struck out on my own." Alyd's eyes narrowed when she said that. "Allowing a daughter of the family to leave, that's.... progressive." "It's a new era, as they say new ideas prevail." Alyd was having none of Flora's bull. "As I heard it told royals are slow to change, and slower to act. So, I don't think they'd allow a daughter to leave of her own volition, at least not a main family daughter. Forgive me, I'm only a baron's younger sister so I don't know everything about another kingdom in our glorious empire, but how many children did the king have?" "His Majesty has been blessed with seven children, unfortunately his eldest son died many years ago." "Ah yes, the Kilmire incident. That was tragic." "Indeed, and to answer the question you want answered. I'm not part of the main family, just one of the many cousins of the children." Alyd's posture changed once she heard that. She straightened further, trying to look down her nose at Flora. "I think we've wasted enough time on introductions, don't you think so Flora?" She actually didn't ask for mine or Eric's names, but whatever. She led us into a smaller room with a lit fireplace, books, tables, and chairs. There was a guard in this room also, it is Geoff. What's he doing in here? Shut up Patty. Alyd waved Dag away, she then sat down in a big comfy chair. Then, she turned to the maid standing by the door. "Colette, get me some tea." The maid left immediately. "Now, how can I help you?" Those other seats look mighty comfy, but none of the girls are sitting, so I refrain from sitting as well. "Lady Müller..." "Honourable." Flora swallowed her pride. "Yes, forgive me, honourable lady Müller we recently purchased some land, and when we attempted to pay our taxes on said land the infrastructure guild referred us to the baron. They said something about it being flagged." The maid returned with a hot cup of tea, Alyd waited until she drank a couple of sips before answering. "Yes, you must be referring to the land near the dungeon." "That sounds like the one." "The land my great grandfather foolishly gave away to make a commoner a baronet, to thank him." I don't like where this is going. She leaned forward. "Let me be straight with all of you, that land is ours, and my great grandfather should have known better than to give it away. He was old when he gifted the land, and unfortunately my grandfather along with my father upheld his decision, and by the time my brother came into power he had the land so long we couldn't do anything. Not only that, but he was also exempt from taxation. But...." Flora decided to finish her thought. "But now that he has sold it, you can charge us the taxes he didn't pay. If we decide not to, you'll take the land back." She took another sip of tea. "See, I knew you were smart Flora." "How much?" "Hmm?" "How much... do we... owe?" She leaned back in her chair, pretending to think. "Well, I think two hundred and fifty-three shields should just about do it." "What! That's way too high! There's no way it could be that high!" "Normally yes, but prices for taxes fluctuate for a number of reasons. And in this case a dungeon formed essentially right by it, even you can tell how much revenue could have been procured from said land." "We can't pay that." "Then, it looks like that land will have to be repossessed. I truly am sorry." She said that as she was smiling. "Excuse me ma'am, but they could get an extension for a year after purchasing the land." Geoff - who I had forgotten was standing near the wall - spoke up. She stood up and faced him. "And what would a commoner like you know of the law?" "Before my mother died she worked for the infrastructure guild, she would teach me a little when she'd come home." She is glaring at him with barely held rage, and he's staring right back. "He's right about that." Alaric said coming into the room. He did a short bow. "My lady." "What are you doing here?" "After I put your other would be visitors in the nearest inn to... recuperate, I decided to join your ladyship. I would advise you to heed the young man's words. If not, the young lady Dreyas might call upon her family to put pressure on the courts. The Empire favors their kingdom above ours." There was a tense stare-down between them. What the heck is going on? Ain't he her employee? After a few seconds, she straightened up, and smoothed out her dress. "Fine, I can wait a year more. But that does not excuse his behavior, I demand he be punished." She was pointing at Geoff. "That would be hard, considering he's already being punished." "How is guarding me a punishment?" I can think of a few ways. "It's to teach him diligence my lady." "Well, then, I can just fire him." "No offense my lady, but only your brother may do that, and he is away on business." "He gave me authority!" "On trivial matters my lady, and even when he does return I doubt he would fire him then. The forest is more dangerous than it has been in years, we need as many guards as we can get." Geoff decided to interject. "If the lady is displeased with my punishment, she can always assign me to scout duty." Alyd smiled a huge smile when he said that. "What a lovely idea." Alaric glared at Geoff, then turned his attention back to her. "Don't listen to him my lady, he is just a youth that is stupid and angry." "That doesn't matter. You are right that I can't fire him, but troop reassignment I can do, right?" "Yes, your ladyship, but I beg you to recon..." "Do it, transfer him. He's young and agile, he'll probably live. After all, you did say we need more guards out there." She had smile that would suit a devil on her lips when she turned back to us. "Well, I think that settles this for now. I will see you in a year, or would it be more apropos to say I will see my land. Bye." She shooed us away. Why is it that the people you really want to rip the hearts out of have a hundred guards?