"LOGAN STOP!" I yelled as I tried to pry his hands away from Michael's throat. I kept yelling and screaming which soon brought attention to the people at the party. Michael soon started to gasp for air and I got sick and tired of this. "LOGAN STOP OR I WILL LEAVE YOU!" I yelled. I was now crying as well, my mascara was running down my face. Logan quickly looked at me and he saw me crying, seconds later his eyes were no longer filled with rage. They were filled with sadness. He dropped Michael to the ground. "What the hell is your problem?" I asked him.
"Aria, I am so sorry. I don't know what came over me." Logan said. "Bullshit Logan! You're fucking jealous! I don't know why! And I don't care! I want you to stay away from me!" I yelled. "Please don't make me stay away from you." Logan pleaded. I looked around us and everybody was again, staring at us. "Let's go talk in private," I said. Logan nodded. Before I left with Logan, I quickly checked on Michael who was breathing heavily. He told me to go and talk to Logan and that he was okay. He ended up giving me his number.
Logan and I headed upstairs into the master bedroom. "What was that Logan?" I asked him as soon as we made our way into the room and once the door was closed. "I don't know Aria," Logan said. "Was that jealousy?" I asked him. "I'm not sure. I mean I don't want to be a hypocrite or anything, but I guess the feeling of somebody else kissing you hurt me. In so many different ways Aria." Logan said.
"You kiss Kaylee all the time. And you don't think that puts an effect on me?! I know we are just friends with benefits, but I still have feelings, Logan. And you are being a fucking hypocrite. Thinking that you can date other girls but I can't even KISS a guy!" I yelled. "I know Aria. I know. I made a mistake, okay? And I don't know how to fix it. I want to date Kaylee, I want to move on from you." Logan said. Move on from me? What does that mean?
"Logan, what do you mean move on from me? Do you like me or something?" I asked him. "I don't know Aria. Before I started to date Kaylee, I thought I felt something for you. No, I know I felt something for you. No, it wasn't love. Maybe it was a mild liking. But I talked to one of my old friends. And they told me it might have just been lust. And that it happens all the time to people like us. People who do friends with benefits. But, as time went on. I started to like you. So that's why I agreed to date, Kaylee. And as time passed, I started to like her. But when I heard that you kissed some guy. All those feelings came rushing back. Making me want to hurt him with everything I had." Logan said.
"I don't believe that Logan. Yes, maybe you felt something for me. But you fear that if I start to date, and I like them. That this whole friends with benefits will end." I said. "No, I swear it's not that. I like you Aria. I truly do." Logan said. "Then why have you done NOTHING! If you liked me you should have told me!" I yelled.
"And maybe then, we could have been something," I said under my breath. "Please Aria, you have to know that if I could go back in time, I could totally have changed everything. I would have told you how I felt. And asked you to be mine." Logan said. "I think we need to end this friend with benefits before things turn to the worst," I said.
"Aria, please don't end this," Logan begged. "I think it will be best Logan. I can't do this anymore." I said. "No, you don't get to do this to me Aria! I have done everything for you! You don't get to leave me when things get rough!" Logan yelled. Now I started to tear up again. "Baby, please don't cry," Logan said hugging me.
"Don't call me that," I said before pushing him away. "I am not your girlfriend," I said. "Fine. I get it. But please, give us one more shot. I know I made a mistake. If you chose to date somebody, I won't stop you. I am trying so hard to move on from whatever I felt for you. I thought I had, but I guess I was wrong. I know you feel something too." Logan said.
"But we wouldn't be good together Logan. Our jealousy would get the best of us. We would end up cheating on each other anyway." I said. "That isn't true. I would NEVER cheat on you Aria." Logan said. "You cheated on every single girlfriend you have ever had, how am I suppose to trust you?"I asked him.
I'm not sure what to think, could Logan and I actually be together? I mean, I love him. But I am not in love with him. "because I would never do that to you Aria. And I know you would never do that to me." Logan stated. "I'll go and break up with her right now. I swear, just give us a chance." Logan pleaded. He looked down at my lips. "Please Aria," he said quietly before kissing me.
The kiss was passionate. But it was not what I was looking for. There was no fire. Logan and I were not meant to be together. Logan and I's sex was only good because we had fun sneaking around. I quickly pulled away. "I don't want to be with you Logan. Get that through your head." I said. I need to do this. I need him to back away from me. It's the only way. "So what now?" he asked me. "Is the friends with benefits over?". I shook my head.
"If you continue to date Kaylee, then fine. But I need a boyfried too. We need to move on." I said. "And how us having sex help with that?" Logan asked. "It doesn't. But do you want to stop having sex?" I asked him. Logan shook his head. "That's what I thought," I said. "I'm telling you this now Logan. I don't like you how you like me. And I am so sorry about that." I lied. I do feel something. But he can't know that. Maybe in another life, we could be together. But again, there is no fire. They say when you love somebody that when you kiss you should automatically know if they are right for you. But I felt nothing.
"Let's go back downstairs," Logan said leaving the room. I didn't want to hurt him. But he needs to know that truth. I feel something small. But that would give him hope. And as bad as it sounds, I need to make sure he never wanted to be with me. I need to move on, cause a few years ago. I felt something too. But when he told me that he ever saw anything in the future of us together, it broke me. So I stopped feeling love toward him.
I walked back downstairs. Kaylee and Logan were again talking. I pulled out my phone and put Michael's phone number into mine.
Aria - would you be interested in hanging out tomorrow after classes?