Everything is blank. Pitch black. Nothingness. I look down and see myself in uniform.
A grand building appeared in front me, the color, the shape, the form, it's all so familiar. It's the house but, older. The one I used to remember as a child. The one where I was under the spell of childhood.
But I don't want to remember this. Not anymore. I heard a child cry from a distance. It must've came from the inside. I tried to ignore it but it was all that suddenly filled my head.
I approached the deafening sound, passing through rooms that I've never thought I would be able to see again. The family photo when I was just a little boy, the smell of grass outside from our little garden. The sunflowers that we planted on my 10th birthday.
I took a left towards the room where I was now almost certain the sound came from. It was me. Except I was happy. It was me.
And my mom. Who sat on the bed, on the corner of the room looking at me
Take me away from here, I dont want to be here. I wanted to wake up, this is something I didn't want to remember.
But I couldn't.
"Lin!" I hoped he would be able to hear the urgency in my voice.
But he couldn't.
"Mom?" The little boy said. "Can I try to wear your shoes?" He said, approaching Mom across the room.
"Lin, I want you to listen to me. You can't be like this." Her voice was thick, breaking at the end.
"Be what?"
"You can't like what you shouldn't. This is wrong, honey."
"What do you mean?"
"My shoes is only for Mommy, okay? You can wear your own shoes."
"But Mom-"
"No buts."
This time, I was leaning against her shoulder and she caressed my head, tears slowly falling down her cheek.
"Okay Mom."
I woke up, gasping for my breath, puzzled, confused, scared. A million different emotions filled my mind at once.