This affection towards you will become my curse.
Li Jun Jie
***
Few hours ago…
In the early morning, I find myself still the same with this feminine body. I hate to be a girl even I have to admit this face is so beautiful but I cannot accept it.
In fact the pain still remains but I don't want to just stay over here and hide behind Huang Manor. I have to find the hairpin even if that is an impossible thing in this world but I insist on finding it and giving it back to them. I get dressed and go to the riverbank. I cannot see people on the street. I am walking accompanied by darkness and lantern rays along the way.
"Hi beautiful girl don't you want to accompany me?", A man said. He seems drunken. I think he is a son from a rich powerful family because his silk clothes showed his family status and not every family can afford such fabric material.
'How they know I am beautiful? Even if they see a donkey, they must say it's beautiful as well.'
I try my best to ignore this man. I hold my lantern tightly as I keep walking forward without turning to see him. I don't want to look for the problem but why does the problem come itself? As that man grabs my left hand and pulls me closer.
"You don't be afraid. I promise to marry you but now…"
"Now, I want to go.", As I said, I stomp his feet. I will never let him look down on me.
"You…you…"
He tried to punch me, fortunately I moved quickly so that made his face become red.
"Don't disturb me." I said.
Now… I understand why being a girl can be so difficult even if you just want to go to the riverbank. Because of people like this bad guy. He looks so angry when I can avoid his punch. How come the drunken man can bite me? If I don't want to go to the riverbank perhaps I will give him a lesson but now I cannot. I manage to walk again but that man looks like don't want to let me go.
"Guards!" As he shouted, few men came with their sword.
He called his people now? Oh…God… why do I have to meet trash like him? If I fight them now then I will waste my precious times to find the hairpin. To be honest, this man can make me desperate as his people start to attack me. There are more than five men. How come I go from this place? I can only avoid their attacks because my body is still weak. If I keep doing this then I will drain my energy out. I hope Yu Wen will be here…
Then in a few seconds I see a man just appear before me. I know! He is Yu Wen. He is standing with a sword in his palm, pointing at those who surround us. I don't know why Yu Wen looked so exhausted but I feel so calm because I can see him now. With Yu Wen, I don't feel afraid even if I have to fight them all.
"Young Master, please go now. I will handle them for you." Yu Wen whispered gently so only both of us could hear.
"Yu Wen, I will never leave you." I said then take a deep breath. "Let's fight together."
Yu Wen looked at me with a sharp gaze. I will never let him fight by himself. I promise to protect him no matter what.
Yu Wen is a cold person. He never says a lot of words to me or other people. Actually Yu Wen showed his affection to someone through his acts. Even a lot of people complained about his cold character but he never betrayed me. During this time, Yu Wen is always beside me without complaining.
"Just go now before someone takes the hairpin." He said.
"Yu Wen…You are more important for me than the hairpin."
Yu Wen startled as heard my word but I think he doesn't need to startle because I know he will do the same for me.
"Then just go. We will meet again at Huang Manor. Trust me." He whispered then pulled my left shoulder and made me back forward and stopped five meters from Yu Wen.
After he said that then I decided to go to the riverbank not because I want to leave him behind but I trust him. I trust Yu Wen. He will find me later and we will meet at Huang manor. Beside that Yu Wen has high skill in martial art.
I keep walking and arrived at the riverbank when sunrise. I cannot see clearly because my lantern falls when I fight with them. I looking for the hairpin between the rocks but I see nothing. Why do I feel so desperate like this? I don't want to be trapped in this body forever. I don't want to be a girl. I don't want to have a connection with Huang manor. They are witches.
'Lady, the hairpin will find the chosen one so you will not find it until it comes to you by itself.'
That voice makes me afraid. I know Xiao Ran who talks with me through my mind but I don't want to accept it. So I ignore her voice in my head and keep searching.
'Please God, Show me where is the hairpin. I really don't want to be like this. I want to be myself as Li Jun Jie.'
I feel the tears just falling down from my eyes. My face becomes moist but my heart is dry. I am the one who hasn't hope anymore as I cannot see anything except the rocks and water. I shouted loud. I don't care if someone will hear my scream. I can't hold it anymore. I don't care if I change as a man here.
"Just take my life! I don't want to life like this way!" I screamed again but here I am accompanied by silence and sounds of water flowing in this riverbank while the sun rays bathing me with their gold colour.
'Lady, just come back here because you belong to the Huang family.' Xiao Ran said again.
'Please give me time. I want to be alone.'
I am sitting on the big rocks and looking at the riverbank with emptiness. My hope is gone. I don't know what should I do. Now, I just want to be alone.
"Young Master, I am looking for you at Huang manor but you are not over there."
As I heard Yu Wen's voice from beside me so I turned to look at him. He sits beside me and taps my shoulder. Perhaps this is his first time to see me crying as a girl.
"Yu Wen…I.."
He doesn't say anything, just let me rest my head on his shoulder while I wipe away my tears.
"Yu Wen…"
I want to talk but no word can escape from my mouth. This heart feels so heavy. I close my eyes and let the windy air blow my hair. I just don't care anymore. Perhaps I have to accept this fate. I think my time as Li Jun Jie is limited but before that I have to solve my father's case.
"Young Master please take a rest. I will guard you here."
"Uhm…I'll sleep." As my eyes were closed. I am so exhausted now. I just want to sleep now.
I am not afraid because Yu Wen here. He will take care of me.
***
At the same time there were a couple of eyes that saw scenes with heart full of anger and jealousy. As what he sees is Yu Wen draws closer to kiss that sleeping girl.
***