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The Lost And The Found

maverick_d_aece
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Synopsis
It is always lost, something, when something else is found. It is always a trade. Nothing in this world happens good to you of which you will not pay the price. How you pay it though, is all ways of the trade. Sometimes you pay it dearly and sometimes the trade does not seem balanced. Sometimes you feel cheated and at others you seem to have gained more than you should've. It's all transient. What you took from this Universe will go back to her. In the end, the very end which is debatable to come or not, everything will settle, every trade balanced and every lost - found, every found - lost...

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Chapter 1 - The Bearing

It had to be one of those fateful nights because nothing that was fated ever happened magically. No, there is no magic, everything is and can be defined by logic. If it can't then it's an illusion, a deja vu, and one can never build anything on a footing of such an event.

The day I was born was fated too, when my "father" fooled around with my then naive mother. I never found him nor did I ever lost him, it was my mother. She was the one who lost so many things to find me in her. I would never know if it was an even trade but it had to be yet this lingering feeling that I am worth no good makes it feel like she was cheated in a very bad way.

She lost me too after the fated months of nine to this hungry world, ready to devour and disfigure all that was pure and true. What she gained after that, what she found when she lost me will always be beyond me. I asked her one day and she said, "What I found you say, well I wouldn't look at it that way, I would say that I never lost you in the first place, merely switch places. In fact by having you outside me I am in more joy than having you inside. I'd say I gained even more by having you outside because now I can see you, touch you, hear you and more importantly understand this beautiful soul you have." Of all the things in the world that's beautiful I wouldn't say my soul is one, in fact it's down right cruel.

And my mother was wrong, there is always an even trade, when she said that she found me more she didn't know or perhaps didn't want to know that she had lost me the same.