Ella and I sat outside a cafe, my eyes still flooded with tears. Two cups of frappucino and a bowl of salad were on the table. Just as I began to pick up a fork, Ella held my right hand tight and began to ask me something.
"Christine, tell me what you're feeling right now."
"Very miserable," I tearfully responded. "Upon checking my weight this morning, I received some shocking news."
"What is it?" Ella questioned.
"Ella, I'm overweight," my sorrowful reply to her.
"I can't help myself. Those doubters were right all along. I deserved to be called 'piggy' by those mean girls in class. My insecurities were glaringly apparent from the start. I should've been dead right now."
"Stop saying that!" Ella called back. "Haven't Michelle and I told you before about caring for each other? You doubt yourself. That's not the Christine I always know."
"And then what?" my voice brimming with anger as I stood up. "You're gonna call me fat? Fine, just call me that. I deserve it. It won't transform me. You're precisely like these other girls I encountered every single day in class. I'm heading home. And please, leave me alone!"
I turned my back on Ella, crossed both arms in anger, and stormed off. Feeling distraught, Ella began to chase me, her tears dropping like rain.
"Christine!!! Christine, come back!!!" Ella screamed as she continued to stalk me everywhere I go.
In the end, Ella was just too fast, and she tackled me outside the mall.
"Christine, I didn't intend to shame you," Ella tearfully told me as tears once again fell from my eyes. "Helping you regain your confidence is my objective."
"Face it, Christine. You may be overweight, but that's not the reason Michelle and I love you. Like we told you before, you have some qualities that other girls or people in particular don't have. You are smart, creative, diligent and humble. Use those qualities to your advantage. Haven't we told you that before?"
After contemplating Ella's passionate words for a few minutes, I began to speak tearfully about the meaning of sincere friendship and value.
"You were right. Sorry if I ran away earlier. I still haven't realized how much you and Michelle regard me for whom I am.We haven't finished the salad and the frappucino. It became a liability. That's why I intend on shedding those pounds for good."
"There is a fitness center inside this mall," Ella suggested. "We can come together tomorrow morning and inquire about it. I can also bring in Michelle if that's okay with you."
"It's fine with me," I said with an assured look on my face. "And by the way, can you carry me back to the cafe? We haven't finished the salad and the frappucino."
"Sure," Ella answered back as she pulled my arms up. Shortly after we walked back into the cafe and finished our meal. Then we went our separate ways, at least for the night.
Upon returning to the room, I was expecting Charissa to be mad at me. Instead, she came out with a look of concern on her face.
"Christine, what happened?" Charissa questioned as I took off my jacket.
"Sorry dear mother if I left you without an explanation," I answered back.
"Don't be sorry for yourself," Charissa talked to me with a soft tone on her voice. "You can always talk to me anytime about your problems. A little heart-to-heart between mother and daughter helps a lot."
And so I explained to Charissa about my weight problems and the insecurities that came with it. She was then shocked when I revealed that my last resort was to commit suicide because of the excess baggage.
"Christine, don't kill yourself," Charissa told me, her face still in a state of despair.
"That's not going to make you feel comfortable. If you have any problems, you can just talk to me, Cathy, Clark or even your friends Michelle and Ella. We're all here to help you. And stop thinking pessimistic things and always look at the bright side. Do you understand?"
Upon hearing Charissa's words of advice I began to cry again and Charissa embraced me as hard as she could.
"I should've listened to my friends and family," my voice cracked with sorrow and pain."Sorry to you if I let you down."
"Like I said, don't feel sorry for yourself," Charissa responded.
"No, I mean this isn't really me at all," I answered back.
"I wanted to lose weight, mother. It's been long overdue, but I felt scared. Now that the feeling of shame became apparent, I need to shed those baggage that I'm carrying and become a better woman."
"Why not you try and work out at the fitness center near the mall?" Charissa suggested.
"I recall Ella informing that to me earlier," I said resolutely. "In fact we're looking forward to join the club with Michelle tomorrow morning."
"Great!" Charissa exclaimed. "Ok then. I'll fetch you to the mall early morning tomorrow. But you must wake up early because I have work at 7:00 a.m."
"Deal!" I responded with a smile on my face.
"And one more thing," Charissa added just before going to bed.
"Better eat healthily if you want to lose weight. There are some fresh vegetables and fruits on the fridge. Also, try reading some dietary tips online to see what diet suits you the most."
"I'll try and look at it. See you tomorrow mother," I concluded.
And so the following morning, Charissa was all dressed in her office wear while I got my gym clothes on. With the radiant sun about to shine Charissa transported me to the mall and dropped me there. But Ella and Michelle have not arrived yet.