Chereads / Scars of My Past / Chapter 15 - Fear of Heights

Chapter 15 - Fear of Heights

he following is a series of text messages between me and Michelle. During this exchange my hands began to tremble as she ironed out the details of our trip to the amusement park.

Michelle: "Christine, this is Michelle. I'm using Carson's phone right now because my smartphone battery ran out of power. You can add his telephone number later. Anyway, tomorrow is the weekend so will you be available that day?"

Christine: "I'm free tomorrow. Why did you ask?"

Michelle: "Well, me and Ella will be going to Star City tomorrow, and I was wondering if you can come with us. We're going to ride the ferris wheel, the roller coaster, the carousel, bumper cars, any ride we want."

Christine: "Sorry but I have fear of heights. (add two faces screaming in fear emoji) I can't make it tomorrow."

Michelle: "You can still come with us but if you're scared of going to these rides that are too high, don't hesitate to ask. You can still go on the other rides that don't involve height."

Christine: "Ok then. I'll come with you on one condition: that either you or Ella will accompany me on any of the rides I choose. Agree?"

Michelle: "Deal. We'll see you tomorrow then. (add a smiling face with smiling eyes emoji)"

Christine: "What about Carson? Is he coming?"

Michelle: "Sorry Christine. He has a private matter coming up. Oh well, see you tomorrow."

Returning to the room, I began to sweat profusely and my body shook with fear. I tried to lie down on the sofa but the trembling only got worse.

A vision of my childhood years then flashed in my thoughts, this time on an amusement park at the age of nine. The flashback sequence is as follows:

Our school held a field trip at Star City back in fourth grade. The field trip also served as our Christmas party so it was naturally an extra treat to end the year.

At first, I felt a sense of security with Michelle and Ella flanking me wherever we go. But then the height of the ferris wheel and the roller coaster overwhelmed me.

"Girls, I'm scared!!!" my horrible remarks to Michelle and Ella upon looking at the two rides. "Perhaps I should not ride any one of them. There is a chance that my body could fall dead to the ground."

"No Christine, you won't die!! We'll be riding with you. Don't be fearful. "Michelle tried to convince me, but my conscience told me otherwise.

Nevertheless, I decided to ride the ferris wheel with my two friends, but as our seat rose the high elevation of the ride trembled my entire body. I covered my face with two palms and began to cry, while Michelle and Ella held both of my arms.

"Conquering heights was not my cup of tea," I shouted to Michelle and Ella. "You should have never allowed me on this damn ride."

"Don't be a coward, Christine," Ella yelled back.

"But seriously, I'm not like you daredevils," my voice screaming in horror.

Fearing for my life, one of my classmates took advantage by taunting me.

"Christine is chickening out. She is a scaredy-cat. She's a scaredy-cat," he shouted as the ferris wheel slowly began to operate.

One of the class teachers overheard my classmate and scolded him for teasing a fellow student. He then apologized.

Three rotations later, the ferris wheel stopped and gradually allowed its riders to drop off one by one. Upon stepping on the ground, I removed my palms off my face yet my body still trembled with fear.

Then one student added insult to injury as I made my way out.

"Coward!!! Coward!!! Coward!!!" he shouted at me.

The fear of getting bullied came back to haunt me. It is as if it never left.

Humiliated, I stormed off and sobbed at the park entrance. Michelle and Ella tried consoling me but to no avail.

Back in the present, I screamed and shouted in fear long enough for Charissa to hear. Upon opening the door, she saw me lying on the floor crawling for dear life.

"Christine, what's wrong?" Charissa questioned, my sweat spreading on the ground. "Don't worry, I'll help you get up and provide some medicine."

Charissa feared I was getting a seizure. So she carefully opened the medicine cabinet and delivered me a generous dose of anti-anxiety medication, brought a clean, wet towel and draped it over my forehead.

After all the commotion, I finally calmed down and fell asleep. Almost immediately, Charissa breathed a sigh of relief, her nervous face all but eliminated any fear of tragically losing her daughter.

Later that night, my eyes gently opened to the sight of a slumbering Charissa, still in her makeup and office clothes. I gently kissed my mother in the forehead, finished the leftover prawn sinigang, and promptly changed to some fresh pyjamas.

I carried Charissa to the plush sofa, covered her in a sheet, and went back to a peaceful sleep beside her. The following morning, Charissa arose and realized she forgot to change to her sleepwear.

"Christine distressed me so much that I forgot to change clothes," my mother thought to herself as the sun rose.

After a brief trip to the bathroom, Charissa started preparing for breakfast, She inquired me to narrate last night's nightmare sequence.

As soon as my explanation ended, Charissa reacted with concern.

"Gosh Christine. I thought you were about to die tragically." "But are you still afraid of heights?" she asked.

"I still am mommy," revealing scaredly to my mother. That's why I'm reconsidering about going to Star City with my friends, although they did agree that they'll take me to the rides that are much safer for me."

"Tell you what, I'll come with you to Star City this afternoon," Charissa suggested as she placed a plate each of tuna omelet and French toast on the table for breakfast. "I'll join you, Michelle and Ella on the ride. Is that okay with you?"

"It's fine with me," I willingly accepted Charissa's proposal with a determined look on my face. "Well, I'll message Michelle on the phone now to inform her that you're accompanying us."

After having breakfast and go through some private bathroom time, me and Charissa left the room and drove to Star City. However, the park opens at 1:00 p.m. so we settled on walking along the picturesque shores of Manila Bay first.