What happened Rishi , why did you stand up", I said surprisingly.
"Nothing, don't forget we are in gymnasium now", he said slowly.
"so what everyone knows about us, since last 3yrs" now I hesitated what he said.
"yet , I dnt want them to be sure, they just doubted about our relationship" he said and moved away .
That day I questioned myself , am I the one who's surrendering in this relationship. I can introduced him to my family then why he hesitated in front of people, does he feels ashamed of me for my looks. That day the seeds of insecurity got planted by myself and I didn't even know when this seeded plant grew in to a huge tree acting like the barrier between us.
I managed to pass my degree with first class in cotton and got admission in Gauhati University. It was Rishi who took me to the university for the first time. I still remember he was very happy that day. The environment of GU was totally different one. Unlike cotton I became a role model for my teachers and friends, instead of getting insulted they felt proud of my achievements. For the first time in my entire life I learned about true friendship. In university I got a new exposure or say new hobby of badminton. I was never good at it yet somehow I managed to be the champion of inter university twice. i was very happy with the new environment but these wrapped me so intensely that I started moving far from Rishi. We hardly met as my time table was very hectic, yet we managed to talk everyday even for few minutes.
"Hey, Sneha, don't mind but do you really think your boyfriend, I mean Rishi loves you" one of my classmate Anjali said to me. She was one of my best buddy in GU.
"Yes, we were in a relationship since 3yrs" I said confidently.
"look , years does not matter, even I was in a relationship for 5 yrs. "
"what do you mean Anjali" I said trying to ignoring her.
"nothing, its your life your decision , but I care about you so be carefull".
Although I ignored her that time , her words nicked deep inside my mind. I was disturbed that day, couldn't sleep the entire night. An incident before a week kept me thinking. We went to an amusement park with Rishi's best buddies, where one of his friend commented on him for having a fatty girl friend like me. And the thing that shocked me the most was that, Shivani and Aditya came to comfort me as I was crying, unable to take the insult, yet the person I loved the most , was standing far away. He was still smiling.
"Sneha , does Rishi really love you, ? " I questioned myself again and again but couldn't find any answer. The seedlings of insecurity grew deeper .
Once I took Anjali with me to the gymnasium. We saw Rishi and Aditya their. I smiled at them but as usual Rishi behaved like we were strangers.
"Sneha , how do you manage all this" anjali asked me on our way back home.
"Manage …what" I asked her.
" like this, behaving like strangers. I mean tell me one thing , what kind of relation is this?"
"Arey, actually we fought yesterday" I said and smiled.
"C'mon don't lie to me, I know you well. He is just using you Sneha, leave him. He'll never able to keep you like the way you are now."
"I don't care, money and all was never an issue for me " now I said cutting her words.
"No, it's not reality, I don't think he'll be able to buy even a lipstick of yours that costs Rs.1200 and the important part is that he doesn't even love you."
"no , you are wrong , Rishi love me" I said looking out of the window.
"It will be better , if you face the reality now."
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