She winced. She seldom hears him say her full name and most of the time, he does it when he's really mad. So, he's definitely mad now, she knew. She scratched her forehead.
"You don't have to announce my name like that Gramps," she replied and guided him back to the car. People are now starting to flock the parking lot as it's nearing nighttime and she doesn't want to be a spectacle on this expected bloody conversation. She escaped her brother but not their grandfather. And she guessed it right, the door has not been closed yet when her grandfather started his litany of complaints.
"What we're you thinking huh? Has some bug infected your mind to make you do something like this? Are you trying to kill me? You did not even consider what I would feel! What if...what if..." she blocked her ears. She saw Mister Alex, their family driver, glancing at them from the rearview mirror. He's trying to suppress his smile. Like her, he already knows what's coming, her grandfather started preaching like a minister would on a Sunday service. And he will keep giving his sermon until she's reduced to 'yes gramps' and 'amen' responses.
"Mayu, are you listening?" Huh? She saw defeat on his eyes. He most likely knew it by now that she did not understand a single thing he said and was instead daydreaming. Still she felt guilty alright.
"Yes Gramps," he just slowly shook his head and gazed at the road. "If only he's here..." she heard him whisper.
"Dad's already been dead for a long time Gramps." He looked at her with questioning eyes. He opened his lips as if to speak but nothing came out. He turned his face back on the road. She hugged him from behind.
"I'm sorry Gramps. My pride won't accept that I can't write anymore," she lamented. She heard him sigh but she just went on talking.
"I don't even know what happened. Everything's just gone. All the ideas that previously flooded my mind, they're all gone. I don't even have a hint what caused it. How could I forget? I'm feeling useless it's so frustrating. I won't accept this. I refuse to."
She was a writer all right. A well known writer in fact. But that was now in the past. Few months back, she felt it, she already lost it. She can't write anymore. She can't even organize her thoughts. She just felt a warm hand wiping the tears she did not notice escaped her eyes. She saw her grandpa's smiling face.
"You know princess, it's really not too late to go back to practice," Mayu frowned at what she just heard.
"That topic has long been closed Gramps. I don't wanna go back to practice anymore." What he's referring to is her nursing practice. She worked as a nurse for two years and she just stopped. She decided to widen her horizon by changing her area of practice. And she's been writing stories since kindergarten so she felt like she'd be successful as a writer. She got the job alright and enjoyed a time of fame. But that only lasted for a few months. She lost ideas. She has not even enjoyed her moment of honor...err...something like that.
For the past couple of weeks, her brother and grandfather has been desperately trying to convince her to stop exasperating them. As this has not been a single event where her life was endangered.
She knew she's giving them a lot of headaches lately but her big writer ego won't allow acceptance that she's already lost her ability to write. If I lost it, then I should find it, she gritted her teeth. She's even willing to spar with anyone just to get back her pride as a writer.
She scanned her grandfather's face. He had this worried look on his eyes. He looked tired, too. She felt guilty enough to look down. He has been taking care of her when her father died. She sighed. She never saw her mom...alive. Well, there are photos. She died giving birth to her but nonetheless her father loved her so much.
She was a spoiled brat alright but she knew when to stop. She's one of those spoiled kids that still has their conscience, ehehe.
She can also say that they are a family of medical people. Starting with her grandfather who's the hospital director of the same hospital he built after he retired as a surgeon. Her father, who is obviously not in the picture now, is also a doctor but died from stroke. This happened after her older brother passed his medical licensure exam. As for her, she was already a nursing student when it happened. Of everyone in the family, she's the only one that lost interest in the medical field.
She never remembered the reason why, maybe she's not really for it after all. They say each family has their own black sheep (1). Maybe she's their own family's black sheep, although she's fair-skinned, she joked to herself.
"You're not listening to me again," her train of thoughts were brought back home with these words of offense from her grandfather. Gosh, I have an active imagination, why can't I write?
"Gramps, I'm really not going back," she responded but he looked more frustrated.
"You're really not listening!" She just flashed him a smile.
"I'm sorry, I just remembered something and ended up reminiscing it," he suddenly grew enthusiastic.
"Really? What did you remember?" he excitedly asked. She just shrugged her shoulders.
"Just some things from the past. Dad's death for example,"
"Anything else?"he cut in.
"Umm. That's about it. Our family history and such things. Is there a problem?" he looked frustrated again.
"Oh, not really. I'm hoping you'd suddenly remember your oath as a nurse and you know , probably wake up from your dream and realize you're a nurse. So we can stop all this nonsense and have a peaceful life," he grinned. She now looks frustrated.
"Gramps,"
"Oh, I know!" he clapped his hands. "Why don't we make a bet?"
She did not hide her irritation when he looked back at him. She holds deep respect for her grandfather but she's definitely going on war- mode if he still keeps on insisting this conversation.
"What is it, Gramps?" she asked lazily.
"I'll give you one week."
One week? What one week?
"What about it?"
"Write any story in one week. Any story. Even if it's just a draft or a short story. Just a week. Or go back to the hospital and work there, he looked dead serious.
"Ehehe. Gramps, you do know my situation today. I have a writer's block (2). Like for weeks now!"
"That's why I'm giving you a week. I have to do this you know. It's for your own good. You will never improve if you keep on going on like this." Uh-oh.
"Gramps," but her words went nowhere. He's now checking his planner and most likely taking note of what he just said.
He already retired overseeing their hospital and turned it over to her brother a few years back. Although he still does surprise visits from time to time just to mess around. She got all the mischievous genes from him and she knows he's up to something once he holds his planner. He's now probably making adjustment on his itinerary. She heard him humming to himself. Great. HELP!
1. Someone who does not follow the norms within their family. Someone different from the rest of the family members.
2. Can't think of something to write or even organize ideas.