Alien Dad Jokes

The best actor was shooting a doomsday movie when he suddenly transmigrated to a real doomsday world and became Aon Flearov, a young man with a huge debt and a blood-sucking family. What does one do in the apocalypse? Of course, shoot variety shows, live streams, do ads, act in movies, hold concerts and fan meetings— The whole showbiz world was placed in real apocalypses, and Aon, a newly-debuted doomsday star, was thrown to a random variety show to fight zombies! It was at this desperate moment that Aon awakened a superpower— A system. DING! [Heyo, dad, your son is online~] Aon: [Son, are you a farming system? A counterattack system? A pay-to-win system?? Anything will do!] The system instantly burst into tears: [B-but dad, I'm a superstar system!] And so, in a doomsday dating variety show: The system picked and chose a few "cabbages" seriously: [Dad, do you want to find me a zombie step mom or an alien step dad? Old or young? One, two, three, or four?] In a doomsday gourmet show: The system handed a frying pan, spatula, guitar, piano: [Go, dad! I want a stir-fry zombie brain, alien omakase, mutated beast AYCE, spirit plant pancakes— ] In a doomsday idol survival show: The system looked at the zombies and aliens crying on their knees, begging for mercy: [Dad! They're all moved by your singing! They want an encore!] [Dad! After you do the zombie dance, the zombies collectively change their race's name!] Doing part-time jobs in the eternal sun apocalypse, camping in a natural disaster doomsday, living with aliens, turning into plants and fighting zombies, fighting against fellow doomsday celebrities— Here, there are various shows you can't imagine. #An actor who cannot become a superstar isn't a good doomsday survivor# The three no: No R18 No harem No boys love

CAUTION : [TABOO] Betrayed by his most trusted soldier captain jack was killed, but when he thought it was all over he meet the soul of a man named Alex Eswald. Alex said to him "I will allow your soul to reincarnate in my body but on two conditions, you need to fulfill these conditions if not you will perish" "What are your conditions ?" "First you need to kill the bastard who betrayed me and get revenge for me" "Understandably, what is the second condition" "the second condition...you n-need to...to" "out with it" "you need to fuck..." "huh" "them all" "huh ?" "The second condition is that you need to fuck all those around me, but not just them, you need to fuck all the powerful women" "How am I supposed to do that ?" "Don't worry I will give you a gift that will help you in your journey, so do you accept and promise to fulfill those conditions ?" "I promise" follow jack as he becomes Alex through his journey to fuck all powerful women of his new world, it's not like he wanted it to happen, obviously, but you know, he had to since he promised. ======== Tags: Reincarnation - Smut - incest - incest Harem - No Yuri - No NTR (there might be netori) - Milf - Harem - Mature - R18 - Pregnancy - others races- Weak to strong *** Hello you all, I'm a new author and this is actually my first novel and I don't have that much experience so there might be some errors, but don't worry I will try to become better. I would like to be honest by saying right now that this novel is for me and fellows cultured peoples to enjoy. So, I assume that those that still remains in this place are all fellows cultured peoples. If you like the story, you should support it (you really should support) Release schedule: one chapter per day. Discord channel link : https://discord.gg/ndfXXVpR Patreon : p@treon.com/RAASD0

The thought of being betrayed by the one person she trusted the most made Lina flee her hometown in South Dakota, with no intention of returning anytime soon. For years, she lived a solitary life, shutting herself off from love and connections. But when a devastating phone call forces Lina to return back home, she's confronted with pains of her memories and relationships she has desperately tried to escape. As she's drawn back into her family's orbit, Lina is faced with the possibility of reigniting a lost love. But can she ever forgive those who wronged her and open herself up to the risk of getting hurt again? Dive into Lina's poignant journey of healing, forgiveness, self discovery and redemption.

*WARNING: Minor Girls and boys should stay away!* When an introverted nobody meets an untimely and embarrassing end in his bathroom, his journey doesn’t end there. Reincarnated in an urban world as a father, he finds out his son is destined Heavenly Child —a young man blessed by the heavens with unimaginable fate—he’s thrust into a life filled with fame, power, riches, and women. But this isn’t a typical shit story. While many 'noobie' seems like the main character in a classic hero’s tale, 'Alex' our reincarnated middleman decides to forge his own path. Navigating the intricate webs of powerful families, he reshapes his fate using sharp wit, newfound confidence, and an unexpected advantage to pursue everything he’s ever dreamed of. But why does his son, blessed with unimaginable potential, live as a son-in-law to a third-rate family? As mysteries unfold, revelations of magic, cultivation, and an impending apocalypse emerge. And why a daughter? How will she fit into this intricate web of destiny? Note/Warning: This novel is entirely fictional. Events, characters, and settings are not based on the real world and will evolve according to reader wishes. Expect updates a minimum of 4 chapters per week (unless the author decides otherwise). Join a tale of ambition, power, and family dynamics in a world where the lines between protagonist and supporting characters blur. Who will truly claim the throne of destiny? Discord - https://discord.gg/z58YWdEDYc Tags: Evil, R18, NTR (MC cuckolding others), demons etc..

After an accidental one-night stand with a mysterious man, Charlotte Johnson had eight children. Four years later, Charlotte lived a blissful life with her eight genius children. Although her life was tough, in her eye's, everything was worth it. However, Henry Stevens, the wealthiest and most powerful man in the Imperial City, disrupted her previously uneventful life. At first, he thought that she was playing hard to get, so he was disdainful of her. However, afterwards, he realized that not only was she the mother of his children, but also the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.

They Weren't Just Hot Aliens; They Were Beast Men Too~~~ ———————————— ————————— She was just an overworked, underpaid author who fell asleep mid-chapter, only to wake up as a maid in her own novel. The bad news? She was stuck in the castle of three insanely attractive alien lords—brothers whose powers could crush her without a second thought. The worse news? In a world where females were considered average at best, she’d somehow made herself the most stunning woman alive. Now, every jealous (and shockingly hideous) female wants her dead, while the lords won’t stop eyeing her like she’s their next meal. Her “insider author knowledge” should’ve been her golden ticket, but the plot? It wasn’t behaving. She’d written them as hot aliens who could transform into beasts—snakes, lions, and cheetahs, to be exact. But something about seeing it up close felt…different. The predatory gleam in their eyes, the way their movements blurred the line between man and beast—it was intense, overwhelming, and nothing like she’d imagined while typing away at her desk. Was this how her characters had always been, or was the world she’d created starting to twist itself into something new? Was this supposed to happen? Did the world start glitching? Or had her subconscious added “hot alien shapeshifters” without consulting her? She didn’t know anymore, and honestly, she was too hungry, sweaty, and irritated to care. One brother craves her touch like she’s his personal drug. Another seems dead set on breaking her spirit. And the third? He’s got a dark secret that feels like a ticking time bomb, ready to ruin everything. Thalina thought the lords would be the only males she’d have to mate with, but now? She’s not so sure anymore. Trapped between the fiery envy of the castle’s women, the deadly allure of three alien lords, and a plotline spiraling out of her control, Thalina’s only goal is survival. Can she escape her own twisted creation, or is she doomed to live—and possibly die—as the protagonist of a story she never intended to star in?

Life is stressful. Oriental mystery jokes to de-stress.

"A thrilling action novel infused with jokes and a touch of life lessons."

A high schooler, Ethan Ryker, discovers an inactive alien android disguised as a fellow classmate, Aya, while cleaning out his late inventor father’s lab. After accidentally reactivating her, Ethan learns that Aya is an intergalactic spy who holds critical information about an impending alien invasion. Together, they must navigate high school drama, fend off alien bounty hunters, and uncover the secrets of Aya’s origin.

Sometimes having space, It's a little lonely in the final frontier. Hoping to find a connection to life outside the world you come from, wondering what's out there and if is it possible to find a friend no matter how broken or scared they may be. This is a slow-burn love story about an alien named Asa (Amazingly Supportive Alien), who falls in love with a female space crew member; sent on a journey with others to deliver cargo of toothpaste. It is easy to tell that the story was inspired by the video game Mouthwashing. It's not that I don't like the game, it's more the fact that the game inspired me to write this story like what-if things turned out a little bit different & with more details added like aliens, info on the higher-ups, how ones actions can effect everyone else. Warning: Mention of r*pe Attempted murder Sci-fi Romantic Fight Scene Light Horror

Shaco, an average boy, uses the Harem God Seducing System to win the heart of Carol, the billionaire’s daughter. Just as he’s about to succeed, alien creatures invade their school, declaring Carol their queen and taking her through a portal to another universe. Now, Shaco must use his newfound powers to face interdimensional dangers, uncover the aliens’ motives, and bring Carol back. Will he succeed, or will she be lost to him forever?

An alien spaceship crashed on planet Earth, and it took the lives of a man and a woman. Before the woman died, she cried for help; the alien came to her aid. The alien saved the baby in the woman's womb, after which the woman died. The alien shape shifted into the appearance of the dead woman and took the child in. 15 years later, the alien died, but before she died, she gave the child that she took in 'Flora' her powers. After her death, Flora grew up under the guidance of Elizabeth. Everyone thought Flora was a naive and innocent lady, but was she as she was portrayed to be? She fell in love with Blake, but was he who she thought he was, and is she who he thought she is?. Flora and Blake have two personalities: the gentle personality that they portray and their evil personality. Will Blake and Flora still be together after finding out they are enemies?

********************************************** Fictionalize yourself waking up just to find out you've been transmigrated to a unknown world, with medieval times technology, as a son to the king's concubine, you're being hated by the queens and your fellow brothers and sisters. Giving raise to them plotting over you and sending you off to the 'land of death'... You will find out more about the 'land of death' and the reason for calling it that in this awesome novel. See how I go against the fate of the land and even the fate of the human world at large... **********************************************

A former dungeon boss, once feared across the land, seeks a peaceful life after centuries of managing minions, traps, and treasure. Now living in a remote town disguised as an ordinary human, he dedicates himself to raising his adopted human daughter, Lila. However, her adventurous spirit and determination to become a hero keep pulling him back into the dangerous world he left behind. To protect her, he secretly uses his dungeon-master skills to manipulate their quests and ensure her safety, all while trying to keep his true identity hidden.

"When I was 5 and mommy told me everything about my "real fu*king dad" and it really breaks my heart anytime my ma'am and dad issue comes to my mind. My dad never wanted to take his responsibilities as a father. So, it was only my mother who was responsible for my whole life for the past years." "It is 14 years now, I have never seen my real dad. You know, it sometimes worries me a lot, but once I have mommy and Garriso around me, it makes me feel a little happier, but just that I miss my "fu*king dad". Mommy told me not to allow daddy to come near me or anywhere around me." "A few days ago, Mommy's cell phone rang for more than 1000 hours, but mommy didn't answer dad's call. That day, I got to know how much mommy hated hearing a word from my dad. But I don't know why my dad still wants his family back. After 14 years, daddy never wanted it, but now-- I think he needs us. " Hmm" mommy also feels the same worried as I used to but never wanted to talk about it, even to set her eyes to see Mr. Lucas, my real dad."

I was hit by a truck and died. Then I met a goddess. I thought she would send me to a fantasy world to learn magic. Instead, she transmigrated me to a parallel universe very similar to Earth. Now I have a wife and two children, I have to work hard to give them a good life. Oh, did I ever tell you that I was sent to a 3rd world country in 1999?

B adalah seseorang yang memiliki kekuatan elemental yang ia dapatkan dari robot alien, ini adalah kisah B dalam mencari jati diri dan menyelamatkan dunia dari ancaman alien!

[TRIGGER WARNING: DARK THEMES, MATURE CONTENT.] In a world where humans, werewolves, vampires, fey, and other supernatural beings coexist, Isleen; an Omega who has been subject to multiple bullying and ridicule in the pack because of her parent's past, faces a challenging dilemma. She's dating Kylo but unexpectedly discovers that his strict father, Rhett, who is the pack’s Gamma, is her destined mate. Conflict arises as a war breaks out among the supernatural creatures and the death toll rises. Isleen struggles with her loyalty to her boyfriend, and the powerful pull she feels towards his father, due to the mate bond. —— Imagine getting married at Eighteen to a woman old enough to be your mother– all because of your loyalty to the Moon Goddess? Welcome to Rhett’s reality. Rhett DarkWater is a man of principles but not without his share of secrets and hidden missions. After finding out who his second fated mate is, he battles with his devotion to the Moon Goddess, his loyalty to his son, and his duty as the Gamma who is supposed to protect the pack—not have his son’s girlfriend pinned beneath him in a corner with her clothes off. Unfortunately for Rhett and Isleen, the mate bond knows no morality – it attacks, and when it does, two hearts must become one. —— I and Gamma Rhett just kissed again. He knelt before me, his hand reaching out to touch me, but I flinched away. "Isleen," he muttered. "This is wrong," I cried. "We can't do this. It's forbidden. W-what about Kylo?” He stared at me, his eyes burning with a passion that frightened me to the core. Yet, it left tingling sensational effects all over my body. "Don't fight it, Isleen. We are mates. This is what we're meant for." ~~ Follow me on all socials; @HeeSha_TA Read my other works: ”My Masked CEO is a Fairy Prince!” “Forbidden Heaven’s Descendants (The Chosen One)” “Medusa and a Magical School” “Mysterious People Next Door” I hope to get to know you in the comments. Happy reading. Cheers!

“Tell me if you heard this one. An alien secretly comes to Earth to be a savior for all humankind. But, instead of having overwhelming powers like heat vision or super strength, his race has the ability to vibrate at unrecognizable speeds, giving them super speed. And, this also allows them to detonate anything they touch. Now, imagine this alien had children with a human woman, twins even. One who took after him completely, while the other was completely normal. Or, so they thought. My name is Avery Satin. I’m a superhero named Xanis, but don’t tell my family. They don’t know a thing. Truthfully, I don’t think they know I exist. Ever since my brother got his powers, Dad has been doing nothing but training my brother. And, my mother doesn’t even try to get closer to me. And, they wonder why I act the way I do. Anyways, I became a superhero because my father and brother are complete idiots and don’t care... no never mind I’ll just let this explain.” -Chapters are not in sequential order-

The astronauts who were captured by magical creatures were extremely surprised and shocked at how they would be used...

The Alien Within Grinwall is no ordinary country, and Riverdale Academy is no ordinary school. Both are covert battlegrounds where powerful beings, hidden identities, and secret alliances shape the destiny of those who inhabit them. Among these is Tessa Caldwell, a Kaelrian alien with unmatched speed and a mysterious, water-like fragrance. Adopted by her teacher, Ms. Caldwell, Tessa tries to blend in, but her distinct blue eyes betray her origins to those who know where to look. Her life changes when Adrian, a fellow Kaelrian with a fiery aura and god-like confidence, arrives at Riverdale. Their connection is undeniable, but it attracts dangerous attention. When Adrian’s alien nature is revealed during a dramatic hospital incident, chaos erupts. Government agents are dispatched, and Principal Hammond is forced to defend Riverdale’s reputation, as students react with fear, admiration, and jealousy. Bridget Mills, Tessa’s rival, mocks her defeat by claiming she lost to an "alien," while others, like Oxlade and Karl, recount how Adrian saved them. Yet the growing tension at Riverdale is only a glimpse of greater dangers. The SSG organization, a sinister force with eyes on Tessa and Adrian, is joined by an even darker figure: Ikehara, the shadow of the sun god, and a loyal follower of Rhemon, a devil with a grudge against Solaris the true sun god, whose plans threaten the survival of the Kaelrians loyal to Solaris and Lunara (moon goddess). In the midst of a high-stakes escape from SSG, Tessa and Adrian encounter the mysterious Rhemonic people. The Rhemonics, regarding Tessa as the successor to their moon goddess, worship her, forging a powerful alliance. This new found bond brings new challenges, including a dangerous quest to gather ingredients to awaken the Rhemonic people from their limited lands and blocked memories, a curse wrought by Rhemon—a devilish force once thought to be their salvation. As Rhemon rises, threatening to control both Kaelrians and Rhemonics alike, Tessa and Adrian’s mission becomes a race against time. Along the way, Tessa uncovers her heritage as the daughter of Lunara, the moon goddess, and Solaris, the sun god. Adrian, the son of Solaris and a maid, shares a complex, divine bond with Tessa, yet both are haunted by the legacies they inherit. Amidst this conflict, Ashley Duve, a woman who shares the bed and secrets with Rhemon, fools Tessa into believing she was the moon goddess, and she entered her conscious thought, gradually eroding it away while she appears helpful and wise and seemingly innocent, Ashley’s actions soon reveal her true agenda. She uses her powers to impersonate the moon goddess, taking over Tessa’s body, manipulating events to help Ikehara gather the ingredients needed to awaken Rhemon. As Ashley’s allegiance becomes clear, Tessa and Adrian realize they cannot trust anyone, not even those closest to them. Against overwhelming threats, Tessa and Adrian must fight not only to protect each other but also to save their world. Grappling with questions of identity, loyalty, and love, their journey unfolds across various chapters of betrayal, alliances, and epic confrontations with cosmic powers. Only by unlocking the potential within themselves can Tessa and Adrian hope to survive this battle, protecting the very essence of their people and the world.

Three high school students were looking for plants in the forest looking for a plant for their school project only to stumble upon an Alien spacecraft. They see a boy their age, but he runs away before they can see his face. Now they have to find out who he is as they suspect it is one of their schoolmates. And mysterious events start occurring as they suspect that he is not human.

Omer has a knack for finding humor in the most unexpected places. From his witty comebacks to his lighthearted pranks, Omer's life is a whirlwind of laughter and surprises. But behind his sharp sense of humor lies a deeper story—one of resilience, self-discovery, and connection. "Joke With Omer" is a heartwarming tale that weaves comedy with moments of introspection, as Omer navigates the ups and downs of friendship, love, and the challenges that life throws his way. This book invites readers to see the world through Omer's unique lens, where every situation holds the potential for a laugh and a lesson. Whether it's turning everyday chaos into comedy or uncovering joy in the darkest moments, "Joke With Omer" is a celebration of the healing power of humor and the importance of never taking life too seriously.

“Do you want to know how this works?” he whispered. “Yes!” I gasped in response to his tug on my hair. “I want to know.” “Yes, what?” he asked, causing my mind to swirl with the realization of what he was into. “Yes, sir. I can be a good girl.” **** For Becca, going to Miami brought up old childhood memories with her best friend, Tally. She needed the break after a rough year attending Yale and a break-up with her boyfriend, Chad. She didn’t expect for her summer of fun to include sleeping with James, the Italian Stallion–Tally’s father. Knowing it’s wrong, she allows James to pull her into a vortex of pleasure that has her breaching the surface of reality and grasping for survival. Can Becca endure this pleasure without Tally finding out? Or will her secrets cause her world to crash around her? Submitting to My Best Friend’s Dad is created by Scarlett Rossi, an eGlobal Creative Publishing signed author.

Max was a carefree man; he didn't like living by the rules and always did as he liked. And the one thing he liked the most was banging women! Like any other day, Max was with his lover when they were caught by her husband. Enraged by the fact that he was put in a green hat, he killed Max with a gun. Max then felt himself floating in a void. He thought it was over until he could sense things again. Turns out, he was transmigrated into another world where there were only women and he was the only man! “Hehe, a world full of women!? It seems I've hit the jackpot!”

My cock is too big, annoying, what should I do? Wait online~！