Slow Horses Gary Oldman Farts

You never know the value of something until you lose it? For Brooke that couldn't have been more farther from the truth! After being cheated by her husband and younger sister, Brooke's miserable life of abuse takes a complete turn for the better when she finally signs the divorce papers! But things are only just getting better! What's this? She's been made joint heir to a multi-billion dollar company?! She's bought her stepfather's puny agency?! She's now the richest woman in the country?! And as an added bonus, her contract marriage husband is handsome and dotes on her every second of the day! Hold your horses, buckle your seats and witness one of the greatest, husband spoiling wife stories you'll ever see! With satisfying face slaps lurking at every corner!

Gary Smith arrived in a peculiar world of beastmasters, where an ancient taboo was reborn from the depth of time, and an evil god was lurking. In this world, birds and beasts, rivers and mountains, even elements could spawn spiritual power and turn into pet beasts. Among them, the powerful ones became ecological niches by themselves, radiating secret realm ecosystems such as the Yellow Spring, Skeleton Kingdom, Succubus Nest, and Kingdom of the Sky Tree, nurturing countless followers. The beastmasters make contracts with the pet beasts, nurture them, and control the spiritual power. After witnessing the "Taboo Sun" event, Gary Smith obtained the ability to extract materials from everything in the world and compile "Secret Food". Through the Evolutionary Secret Food, the combination of "The Shattered Dusk World" + "Ancient Dragon’s Dead Egg" results in the Feast of the End. When the pet beast consumes it, it evolves into the Dusk Dragon God. The Dusk Domain erodes the world, turning into the God at the end of time. The Skill Secret Food allows the pet beasts to plunder skills from everything, becoming omniscient and omnipotent. The Sacrificial Secret Food snatches the taboo time, sacrifices the ancient beings, and blasphemes against the gods. His style of beast control also started to become peculiar. There is the Spider Shadow that devours ancient dragons and weaves dreams of all lives with its threads, the Red Master that pollutes the multiverse, and the Devourer of the Realms, who consumes worlds... In response to this, he explained, "My pet beasts are just a bit peculiar. They really are not evil gods!"

Cultivation is like crossing a river, where thousands of horses and armies vie for the sail. Thus, the moment you choose this path, you step into a relentless race of life. To claim victory, it demands not only the courage to forge ahead but also the resilience to face countless blades of wind and frost, storms of blood and carnage. The struggle begins even before you set foot on the path to immortality

This is the story of a young boy who steps into the world of immortals. If you love Fantasy and cultivation novels, then you can give it a shot. It will be slow paced in start, but I will try my best to not make it too slow, that it might become unbearable to read. The main character (MC) will be a lone individual, avoiding excessive social interactions, including friendships. This is my first novel, so please forgive any errors. I will do my best to make it as error-free as possible. Do remind me in the comments for any errors. --- **Cover Page is not owned by me** ---

The latest novel by the author of 'I Became An Immortal On Mortal Realm', Let me laugh, the author you will never be disappointed with, enjoy to your heart's content!!! ------------- Author's message to webnovel readers: It has come as an unexpected delight that Xianxia novels, a genre unique to China, have been warmly received by an international audience. I sincerely thank everyone for their support. I am committed to considering all the valuable suggestions put forth by readers, and to maintaining the style you have all come to love, all the while striving to continue delivering my best work. The book "Steadily Becoming a Saint, The Immortal Officials Hired Me to Tend the Horses" retains the familiar style of my previous works but ventures into entirely new territory with its plot and world-building. This story will reflect mortal aspirations for eternal life and ascension to immortality, as well as portray the epic tale of celestial beings witnessing the evolution of the universe through the ages. I hope you will all enjoy it. Best regards. by Let me laugh ------------- As a house servant, Gu An accidentally shattered a jar of Spirit Flowers in his youth, and in his panic, he discovered that he had seized twelve years of life span! A path to immortality thus unfolded before Gu An's eyes! In order to cultivate in peace, Gu An chose to become a Servant Disciple of the Supreme Sect, planting medicinal herbs daily to cultivate by seizing the life span of these herbs. Through the evolution of life span, his Basic Skill constantly evolved, deducing from Basic Sorcery to reach Divine Skills that connected to heaven! Eras changed, constellations shifted, and the Mortal World transformed vastly. Gradually, legends of immortals emerged in the Mortal World. The immortal known as Gu An expended half of his life span, helping his Cultivation Level break through the limits of the Immortal Path and achieving the realm of a Saint, soaring above the heavenly laws. However, one day, a white-robed old man with a saintly presence came to visit Gu An. "I am Xuan Qing from the Heavenly Stars above, appointed by the Heavenly Emperor Tai Hao. Hearing of Daoist Friend's numerous benevolent deeds in the Mortal World and your countless rescues of the living beings here, the merits are immeasurable. Thus, I have been dispatched from the Lower Realm to invite Daoist Friend to join the ranks of the immortals, to take up an immortal office, the Divine Steed Celestial Official." "May I ask what the duties of the Divine Steed Celestial Official are?" "In the Heavenly Court, there are divine steeds that can traverse earth and heaven and penetrate Yin Yang. The Divine Steed Celestial Official is responsible for looking after and feeding these divine steeds." Huh? Taking care of horses? Groom?!

Ask, under the starry sky there was a beauty, her black hair like eternal night, bright eyes sparkling like stars, her powerful magic made the world tremble, her supreme beauty made all creatures submit, who was this beauty? "That's right, it's me, the Witch King, Dorothy!" ps: The original title is "Armed Witch." This is a slow-burn story, not for those who dislike a slow pace. Not for those who dislike a slow pace! Not for those who dislike a slow pace!

“Look at you, you were this teeny-weeny when you were little.” Using both hands, Shao Zifeng gestures how small his pet beast used to be. He then raises his head and looks at the gigantic being in front of him. “Just how did you grow into this ferocious form?”

The worst thing to happen to me was a horse. A horse, you asked? Yes, a one of a kind, a Belgian Draft talking mare named Elly. I was separated from my platoon after a unexpected firefight when she captured me against my will. Who was this talking mare and why does she want anything to do with me, a lowly corporal in the US Army during America's invasion of Iran. She said she needed my help and wouldn't take no for an answer. Nor will she let me out of her sight, even for a moment. Better to stick with her I reasoned than take my chances with local residents and roaming militia on the hunt for lone American soldiers like me in the besieged city of Ahvaz. When I do finally get back to my platoon the first question they'll ask is; "James Smelly, what the hell have you been doing with that horse."

Ryu Tanaka, a pro gamer, rage-quits a buggy RPG only to wake up inside it after a freak power surge. He’s in Valdris, a world where the “System 2.0” is glitched to hell: kill a dragon, get a rusty spoon; cast a spell, summon a fart cloud. Worse, his class—“Glitch Knight”—comes with a sentient sword, Snarkfang, that roasts him mid-battle. Ryu’s stuck with a misfit party: a klepto healer, a berserker scared of blood, and a bard who only knows polka. Together, they exploit the bugs—crashing quests for loot, stacking debuffs into buffs—to overthrow the Admin King, a dev-turned-god patching the world to trap them. Victory means escaping back to Earth—or rewriting Valdris into their playground.

Sienna, a 40-year-old assistant manager at an IT company, feels trapped in a monotonous life, for the luxurious lifestyle she craves. Without wealthy parents or a mysterious inheritance from her grandfather, she has had to work tirelessly to fulfill her dreams of wine in the weekend, fishing on the yatch on summer, skiing by winter, and touring a vineyard in fall. Her relentless focus on her career has come at the expense of her relationships, with most of her past girlfriends either cheating on her or leaving due to her constant neglect. Sienna's go-to response when relationships end is, "What else do they need?" - she simply doesn't understand why her past partners couldn't be satisfied with her providing for their material needs. Seeking an escape, Sienna immerses herself in a video game called 'Vintage Point', where the protagonist, male/female, inherits their grandfather's vineyard and creamery. Through the use of cheating codes she got from the game community, Sienna amasses unlimited wealth and the ability to have multiple wives in the game - living out her dream life virtually. "Oh lord, rich, vineyard, and wives. My dream life." One night, after a few too many glasses of wine, Sienna passes out in front of her computer. When she wakes up, Sienna finds herself in a large, medieval-style house, surrounded by four distressed women who seem to blame her for their current life. Disoriented and unsure of what is happening, "What is happening?" This unexpected turn of events propels Sienna into a surreal situation, where the line between her virtual dream life and reality becomes blurred.

Join the journey of Rapt, a reincarnated Raptor and the last dinosaur born on earth, as he battles other beast, Furyan, and more in a bid to survive. Endowed with the power of Lightning by the beast god, Bados, and chosen as one of his many Blessed ones. He’s dropped on the planet Ambu alone with basic knowledge of how the beasts of the planet live. With the pursuit of knowledge and power he needs, he must fight for his title, his territory, his tribe, and most importantly his life. ——————————————————————————— I live for my tribe I die for my tribe As to my tribe does for me To our enemies, we seek to destroy To our allies, we aim to help We are those who have stood firm in the storm Purified by the Lightning We have become one -Rapt ———————————————————————————

[WSA 2025 ENTRY] [Reminder: Yuri, GL, Yandere, No NSFW, Only Wholesome Romance, Toxic Heroines, Slow Paced, Slow Romance, Slow Burn, Slow Harem.] "Damn it, why the hell am I the Villainess?" Petra, a human resources manager, just went through a painfully dumb breakup. To cope? She did what any sane woman would. Binge-read a guilty pleasure romance and smut novel series from her teenage years, only to realize that the heroines have brain-cell-deficiency. One way led to another, she wakes up as Verena D’Auvergne—a minor antagonist who turned out to be the ultimate villainess of the whole series after an incident. The very woman who stole all the love interests and died trying! "Forget the male leads, I have to make the heroines forgive me!" Can she, the ultimate villainess, capture the forgiveness of the very women she was meant to destroy? Or will the cursed System, and fate itself, force her to chase after love? _____________________ [Discord Server: https://discord.gg/aKkmfPUvCq] _____________________

Haruto Kiryuu was a kendo athlete—dedicated, disciplined, and always chasing victory. But no matter how hard he trained, no matter how much he pushed himself, he could never claim the top spot. He was always second. Even so, he never stopped moving forward. Until the night his life was stolen from him. A robbery. A single moment of hesitation. A gunshot. And then—darkness. But his story didn’t end there. When Haruto opened his eyes again, he wasn’t in a hospital. He wasn’t even in his own world. Instead, he found himself lying on the cold, hard ground, surrounded by the sounds of war—metal clashing, men screaming, horses charging. Before he could even make sense of what was happening, a figure loomed over him, tossing a heavy sword into his hands. "You are finally awake… I thought you were done after that cavalry charge."

Asher, got the shock of his life when, under mysterious circumstances, he got a second chance. As he ended up in the body of an 18-year-old, named Asher Blake, who was from the Same World which he was acquainted with. However, even if the world he was in was the same as before, this was a Cultivation World, where the strong ruled over the weak. Armed with his natural talents and a powerful cheat, Asher dived into a journey that was packed with Temptation, Seduction, and Mystery. Along the way, he found himself being accompanied by a bunch of Women, each with Unique Kinks and Powers of their own. As Asher continued his journey to explore this Crazy World, he succumbed to his Desires and had to face tough Moral Choices. Amidst all these challenges, Asher learns that in order for him to survive in this world, he didn’t simply require his strength, but something more than that! *** - NO Yuri - NO Netorare. - There will be MILFs, so you can expect Netori Character Arts are Created by AI.

"Ah so this is what Karma feels like? A cruel death for killing my father?"- Charles. He who died in the footsteps of his Father. Life was a battlefield for Edward, A man who fought all his life. He started from the bottom, dirt poor, became an orphan, but he grew on his own, strived and worked hard and built himself a comfortable life. A Wife, Children, Money, everything. But everything changes when He dies in a car accident on his way from work. He then opens his eyes to find himself in a world different from his own. ["I'm-- I'm a baby??!!"] -------------------------------------------------------- Western Fantasy.✅ swords n magic.✅ Horse riding and carriages.✅ Emperor and Nobles.✅ Cold and Ruthless mc. ✅ READ THE PROLOGUE, EVEN IF IT'S LONG AND HAS LITTLE TO NO DIALOGUE IT'LL MAKE YOU UNDERSTAND THE MAIN CHARACTER BETTER, HAHA. He's definitely not gonna be op from birth. [wink wink] NO HAREM, he does everything he can to get back to his wife on earth(he thinks he'll find her, lmao) WARNING: this is my first REAL novel after doing research and stuff, so don't expect genius God-like writing, but I will do my best. ACADEMY ARC ✅ WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? READ IT! It'll take a while for him to become stupidly OP but bare with me, I'm cooking something up. The pacing might be slow, fast, draggy at times but just wait, it'll definitely scratch that itch. Update stability Kicks in at 50 chapters. No Harem. Barely any Romance. Real Action begins after the first and second arc. He doesn't become instantly stronger than everyone. Expect a LOT of pov switch to give you a better reading experience down the line.

Once upon a time, in a faraway world... an overpowered guy decided to fart - which resulted in some shenanigans. As a result of those shenanigans, now, a highly intelligent 15-year-old boy, Agent Nine, and his sister-friend Agent Six, have to traverse through a potpourri of stupidity to keep on living and enjoying their lives.

Hope you enjoy your stay.(⁠ﾉ⁠◕⁠ヮ⁠◕⁠)⁠ﾉ⁠*⁠.⁠✧ Super slow update btw :33 Still no romance though:)))

A young man who with the destiny of the person who will save the world from totalitarian rule and bring about judgement to evil doers, grows tired of his duty, and even more so when made aware of the alternative to live his own life with his soulmate. Having encountered girl with an angelic presence, he finally feels at home, but continues to be confused about his responsibility to save the world. What matters to him more? Is she the world to him now? There still needs to be the attempt to overcome the evil that has the potential to endanger her life, even if that's to come 80 years from now, and attempting to combat it could just bring it about faster, in which case there's no turning back. While there is still nothing to his name, should he move on from this duty so that way he isn't held accountable in the case that he fails to save the world? The obviously good thing to do would be to somehow get the best of both worlds, but it's too hard for him to figure out what that even looks like in his tired state, so, for now at least, he should follow his love and see what happens.

Ranma di reinkarnasi ke dunia crossover anime sebagai Kamijou Touma, bagaimana nasib Ranma yang sebelumnya penuh dengan kekacauan menjadi jauh lebih kacau di dunia yang baru? Tokoh dari banyak anime lain juga akan muncul di novel ini!

I was a winner. Winning was all that mattered, failure was worse than death. So why am I losing to that shit faced, black haired, blue eyed gary stue. Fuck him. And why the hell was there another voice here, I took over your body shut the hell up. I'm an extra I don't need more problems. Discord: https://discord.gg/EeZKdbrsHF

A boy with white hair standing in front of those powerful god children "they have no shame even if they are god's child" he said "Is it because I have cosmic and chaos essence?" boy thought as he ready to fight all of them as they rush toward him with intension to win. BEFORE THE CHANGE OF FATE- There is no being with both cosmic and chaos essence in history, unaware of this fact the boy with white hair just living a life with no motive, like nothing can excite him in his life anymore. [AN ANOMALY DETECTED PROCEED TO GIVEN THE SYSTEM] [ERROR] [ERROR OCCURED IN DETECTING ONE HEIR PROCESS WILL START AGAIN] [ERROR] [THE HOST ISN'T A HEIR BUT AN NEW EXISTENCE] [EARTH - 5 HEIR ,1 ANOMALY] [GOOD LUCK , NEX ABYSSEL @$#$#] Thinking of himself as just a regular person, Nex found himself presented with an opportunity that sparked a surprising emotion, one he didn't realize he still possessed. This is story of mc will be among god children who will become an new existence.

a man dies and goes through various worlds. join his tale as shenanigans ensue. romance will be involved, but will be a slow burn to start. world 1: Romance of the Three Kingdoms world 2: ???

Story Description [A SWEET MAFIA ROMANCE] Nicole thought that her life would be easy now after she left behind all the memories of an awful night, which led to an unexpected tribulation of her life. She moved into a new city trying to forget the inexplicable incident that happened with her. Little did she know that she can never escape from it because the devil will always find her. No matter how hard she tries to get away from him. He was meant to be her medicine but he turned out to be a Slow Poison. ——————————— I hear his voice bringing me back from the daze as he growls in between the kisses. “ You have no idea how dangerous it can be…” He says with his lips going down to the area just above my breast, he sucks in desperately, squeezing my ass gently, making me whimper in bliss. I clutch to his shirt, trying to hold my body from collapsing. “Careful…you are messing with the devil, Cole.” He doesn’t let me breathe for a minute as he starts attaching me with his open-mouthed kisses all the way back. Rapture succumbs me as I feel his lips again on my neck, traveling higher. I breathed heavily, unable to maintain my composure while being acquainted with this unfamiliar sensation. His lips reached my ear as he gently nibbles my earlobe. “You know why people call me the devil?” His breath fanning over my ear. “It’s not because I am a sinner.” His harsh breath comes out in pants, showing me how equally he is affected as he continues. “It’s because I am capable of making innocent people commit sins.”

General Leo Tenebrae had finally won the war against Great Angleia after three years. The people living in Light, the capital city of Saulelux Kingdom, lined the streets to cheer for the hero’s return as he rode through the streets to the castle on his horse. Suddenly, the crowd became silent when they spotted a petite woman sitting on the horse, hiding behind the tall and handsome general. Isn’t General Tenebrae the Prince Consort of Princess Iris, the first-born of King Sol? Princess Iris had married Leo out of convenience before he left for war. No one had expected the general to marry the woman who was allegedly involved in the death of his first love. During his absence, Princess Iris played the devoted wife, shedding her pretence as the good-for-nothing princess just to maintain the house of Tenebrae amidst political intrigues. How dare he return with another woman, a woman that resembled his first love? Will Iris divorce or fight for Leo’s love, clear the misunderstandings and overcome the obstacles between them? How will Iris find her happily-ever-after?

On the Great Land of China, forces clashed for the sake of supremacy and Bloodline Warriors ran amok; the conflict of the strong threatened to shatter heaven and earth. A young man named Lu Li—nothing more than a humble Coffin Carrier from the Northern Desert—came along with Lu Ling, his sister. The two were regarded as puny insects and bullied, but little did people know that Lu Li had the strongest Bloodline in him of them all. He mounted the most handsome of horses and drank the strongest of wines; He bedded the most beautiful of ladies and murdered the most hated of people; He told a huge lie and carried with him an ill-reputation undeserved; He traveled all by his lonesome and danced with devils; He had given his word that he would come back, that he would be strong. And it was because of this that she was still waiting in the city—alone.

Amon "The Trojan Horse of Fate, The Slug of Time, The Loopholes in Rules, The Manifestation of All Errors." it's been thousands of years since he has wandered across the land . But it's getting boring. Gods are just waiting for their fall . Those old guys from outside are just salivating and waiting. Across the universe just conquer world deceive gods and rence and repeat. When I finally found a new toy that guy Klein it was fun. But that old guy is trying to take his body so he will be gone to. I should just leave this universe for something new . And so he did and arrived in the Gu world.

• Grumpy x Softie • Forced Proximity • Bodyguard Romance • Slow-Burn Romance • Touch-Starved Hero • Opposites Attract • Emotional Healing • Ice Queen Heroine • Found Family • Protectiveness

Alex, live! The city where you walk every day harbors mysterious and unpredictable dangers! All kinds of weird stories, scary monsters and mysterious props. As an ordinary person, how can you face all the dangers and survive in the crazy place? Alex, who had just entered the class, had not yet grasped the gravity of what will come.

(Find the full book on already on RoyalRoad!) The gods make mistakes, and she is the greatest of them all. Can this accidentally chosen one save the world from herself? Ashtik Sai-Weleg is not a hero, nor is she a villain. She's nothing but a simple huntress with some mild social anxiety. That is all she has ever been, and that is all she ever wanted to be. Then an old and long-since forgotten god decided to put into action, his ancient and foretold prophecy. If all goes to plan, his holy Champion would have been there to save the world. Only... it did not go to plan. Instead of the chosen one, his divine mark has been violently attached to Ashtik, and now the whole world stands on the edge. Can she unite the world? Can she forge an alliance to battle the apocalypse? Can she remain on the side of good when all evil actions seem to save so many more lives? Probably not, but it might be fun to see how she gets along. The world either thinks her a chosen one or a wicked lying heretic, only she knows that the truth isn't nearly that simple. A rise to the top tale, featuring themes of imposter syndrome, addiction and (found)family bonds. Warning; Ashtik isn't a superhero. Punches hurt like hell, and she gets her ass kicked a fair amount. This isn't a power fantasy, its a tragedy.

Aeron rode the horse well. From whence he was a child, there was nothing that he simply couldn't do. Now that he had a will, to catch this girl running away from him; he rode even faster. Within split seconds he was able to catch up with this mystery girl who sort of sucked at riding. 'Why-why! is he chasing me?... is the duke here to ask for his clothes; should I just throw 'em on his face and run?... Holy! Why is this man so damn fast?' Zielle's thoughts were running around while she continued making a useless effort to escape. But what came after shocked Zielle two-fold. The duke came close to her horse and carried her and placed her on top of his horse like; he was carrying a bag of potatoes, a very light one at that. Zielle's heart had never beaten so fast; 'Maybe, because I rode after a long time' she thought in her head. "Quite the runner aren't ya?" he spoke with a sly smile on his face. "What do you want?"; Zielle uttered as soon as she found her breath. She almost called the duke 'muscle guy'… "Sleep with me" a voice came from the man with the same cunning look on his face. 'Are you fucking kidding me?'; she would have said that out loud if this man wasn't the duke... But still this situation was too unacceptable; 'he's hot yeah but where did he get the audacity to…!' >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> She's a woman with vigor and a strong mind; she would do anything to get her hands on the Kieran; that she has forever wanted. He's the most powerful man on the empire yet his head bows down to this single woman..... An oozing hot romance between a man and a woman seemingly on a winter vacation? Would this girl desist from her greatest desire because of love for this one man? would this man be able to take the weight of the dark secrets within the woman he loves? PS: The cover is not mine, please contact me privately if you want it taken down.