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Zelda Parody

The Vampire King's Only Antidote

Lord Ragnar Kamazotz is a vampire and the first ever of his kind. The beast in him only recognizes the tune of one lady…his Zeda. In his earliest years, she was the only person that could calm him down or get him close to sanity with the help of her instrument. All that stopped when she was gruesomely murdered by the greedy members of the royal family. He slayed everyone involved but he was never himself again. He survived by relying on The Prophecy that promised her coming back. Seven centuries later, he meets her again and his world is at peace until scenes from the ancient days rise up in this present one, threatening to kill her…again! People called her his poison but he called her ‘his Antidote”. ************************** “I remember…I remember you now my love” Zelda said as more tears fell from her eyes as she looked at the man who had suffered through centuries seeking her return. Kamaz was tongue tied…overwhelmed and his heart rate was faster than normal. She remembers… “I missed you so much Zeda” Kamaz said and Zeda lifted her hand to his face and he leaned into her small hand. “I missed you badl..” Kamaz wanted to continue but the rest of his words were buried in Zeda’s mouth. She had stood on her toes and slid her hands around his neck, dragging him to her level and placing her lips on his. Kamaz was stunned but not for long… He lifted her petite frame from her thighs and wrapped her around his waist for their heads to be at the same level and tears fell off their eyes as they kissed - pouring all of them into that soul uniting and heart joining kiss. She moved herself impossibly closer to him, making him second guess his decision of taking things slowly with her. “Quinzi toman,” Kamazotz groaned as their scents tangled.
SapphirePeter · 10.9K Views

Griselda.

I quiver as he snakes his arm around my waist with his lips behind my ear whispering, "So what would you say about my proposal, Zelda?" Peering into his eyes with a smile on my lips, I entangle him in a hug and plunge the knife at his back taking him by surprise. Slowly, he goes limp in my arms falling on his knees before me while staring at me and not uttering a word. Leaning forward, I give him a peck as a tear escapes from my eyes. "I'm sorry, either way it's meant to come to this." I say giving a him final look before twisting the knife further at his back, leaving him to bleed to death. ***** Griselda Capell, a seemingly average young lady with hidden abilities has only one ambition in life, 'to become successful and find a fairytale type of love'. Her dreams come crashing down when she's sold off to the Royal pure blooded Garcia's family as a mistress to the heir, Aidan. Slowly, she entertains the idea that life with Aidan doesn't seem all bad as they rather fall in love. Soon, her hidden abilities are slowly discovered and harnessed, with emissaries of the Venine temple whisking her away and intimating of her role and destiny in life. Plots, twists and turns ensue as her destiny which she's expected to fulfill is in stark contrast with Aidan's, which harshly drifts them apart and turns her into a version of herself she had never dreamt of, a monster as some may call her. With a mass of powers at the tip of her fingers, tons of army at her command, Griselda turns out to be Aidan's most dreaded enemy, fear and weakness. A entrancing tale of love and hate, lovers to enemies, both expected to do away with each other, which will survive?
Marya_Adims · 18.6K Views

My Pick Up Artist System

"With this system, I'll become the world's greatest seducer! If it doesn't kill me first..." I was a nobody, a short fatty Otaku. Then, a girl's voice popped into my head: [Seduce a woman within a month or die.] "What the hell...how? I'm an 18-year-old virgin..." [7+ looks only. No slam donkeys.] "You’re forcing me to die!” Facing annihilation, I saw no choice but to join the international community of pick up artists, and from that day forward, my boring student life became filled with craziness and womanizing. I just had one problem: "Why are all these guys insane?!?" Pick Up Artist: One who uses specialized tactics to seduce women. Additional Tags: weak to strong, supernatural, action, fantasy, funny, dungeon, face smacking, bloodlines, modern, harem, r-18, litrpg,magic, cultivation, martial arts, shameless protagonist, parody, satire, succubus, netori, adult, ecchi, sex, hidden gem, drama, wuxia, adventure, mature, school life, seinen, princess, billionaire, werewolves, xuanhuan, erotic, erotica, romance, revenge, polygamy, psychological, r18, 18, 18+, smut, hentai, comedy, light novel, alchemy, system. *No Netorare or Yuri. *If you dislike harem, I guarantee this one will be different and become the best harem you've read on WN. There are colorful characters, no bad romance, and no annoying female conflicts driving the plot. *Every volume so far has been even better than the prior one. *If you're wary of reading originals, I assure you that I'm a native English speaker and you'll find the writing here to be at a print professional standard. If I said this story had the 2nd best grammar on Webnovel, no author or translator would dare say theirs had the 1st. *If you doubt any of the above, please read the hundreds of 5-star reviews. Some originals may have more reviews because they're older or get more marketing from Webnovel, but I doubt they have more glowing 5-star reviews. RELEASE SCHEDULE: 1 new chapter posted every day by 12 pm Est/12 am GMT+8. Bonus chapters don't have a set time, but if there are some pending, on per day is posted for 2 chaps/day total. Join the largest Webnovel Discord of 2500+ readers for character art and more: https://discord.gg/VSKzgzV8J9 (case-sensitive) If you'd like to make a Paypal donation to support the cultural cause of the novel and author: https://bit.ly/3lU4xD1
SamsaraWithWords · 11.6M Views

The Alchemist Archvampire: Chronicles of the Unseen Alchemist

Brief Notes for Those That Don't Want to Waste Their Time: +The chapters will be between 1000-2000 words and I will write until I feel like the chapter is over I don't like cliffhangers +As the title says, the story will follow the daily life of a powerful archvampire that interested in Alchemy. - So if you're looking for a novel with great plot twists, an overpowered main character making cool entrances and saving delicate female leads etc, you're in the wrong place. +The main character will use his power to entertain himself and find something to do with his endless free time. While doing that he causes something that he wasn't aware of... +And he doesn't like to leave his castle but over time this might change with the interactions he will have with female leads. +If you're not interested in mc's backstory, you don't have to read synopsis **** After centuries of war and slaughter, the Archvampire Jasper Shaw had finally become the most powerful being. The only one who could match him was the Demon King Asmodeus himself. But there was no chance of them fighting to each other, they were childhood friends from centuries ago. Jasper had achieved his goal, he was the strongest, he had no rivals. He had everything he wanted in the palm of his hand and of course he enjoyed it to the fullest. Wealth, women, authority, everyone in the world bowed down and offered gifts to gain his favor. Like that centuries passed... Jasper had gotten bored with everything. The endless time he had without a purpose became a prison for him. He created a castle for himself near the castle of his ancient friend Asmodeus and did not come out of it for three hundred years. He spent the first decade of this period sleeping in his coffin, which was the longest decade of his life. After a decade, Jasper decided to get out of his coffin and find a hobby. He played silly games by himself, drew pictures, wrote articles, poems and eventually got bored with all of it. In time he became interested in various types of magic but he quickly mastered in every magic so this hobby became boring to him as well. For a while he even became a gourmet; he tasted the blood of many different adventurers of different races, weights and sizes who came to his castle for different reasons, and he had a lot of fun while tasting that bloods. In the process, he didn't talk to anyone, he just watched them and somehow managed to get their blood, but of course there was one exception. That exception was an elf named Kael and over time the two of them developed a friendship based on mutual interest... After two centuries passed like that, Jasper finally found something that really interested him and that he was not very skilled at, Alchemy! But of course, he was not very skilled only for his standards. He spent ninety years doing Alchemy, he was still enjoying it, but he was running out of ideas to do something with alchemy. Right around this time his friend Kael told him that he was not going to visit him no more. Kael had been giving him his blood when he visited him, now Jasper would either have to talk to someone or find a way to get their blood again. Of course, Jasper was no longer the old Jasper, he was very picky about blood, so he had to find someone suitable and keep them visiting the castle, and of course he had to come up with new ideas to continue his hobby... Additional tag: Parody
LemonTheFirst · 44.7K Views

Infinite Flow: ML… Where TF are You?! [BL]

AUTHOR NOTE 14.05.2024: Hello all! Sorry for the long wait, I wrote myself into a literal corner and realised I have to retcon a few things in arc 4 before I can move on with the story. Will try to get this fixed in the soonest! Really sorry for the wait TT o TT **** Infinite/Unlimited Flow horror BL novel Might be a parody. And MC might be a villain.... 1v1 Introducing: A suicidal and bored MC and… wait, where the f&?! is the ML?! *** Lam Thanh Van believes it’s about time someone ended his miserable life. But being an immortal has hindered his path to Hell. Scratch that, Hell is off limits with the terrifying speed his body stitches itself back together, no matter how much someone might hack him to pieces. With such a long and torturous life of trying to finish himself and failing miserably, he imagines that his death would be grand, like slaying a dragon - or a very persistent cockroach. Now, the only problem was finding a hero worthy of such a cause. *** [The last player has arrived. Players, prepare for briefing.] [Welcome to the annual 2023rd survival championship.] The grand doors to the dome slowly pulled close, drawing everyone’s gazes over to the lone figure standing by himself, like a rabbit frozen in the headlights. In front of the sea of players, fawn eyes dilated with fright. Fresh tears still clung to the lashes that framed the eyes so green they reminded the people of ocean waves crashing to the white sandy shore. Long limbs were clad in a simple T-shirt with a pair of washed-out jeans hugging his slim waist. Messy lavender hair and snow-white skin tinted with faint pink seemed ethereal in the scene. Like a magnolia tree growing in the desert… or a white lotus sprouting from a pile of bullshit. One brave individual broke away from the herd, cold eyes set on the last player. ”Stay with us if you want to live.” Lam Thanh Van raised his gaze up to the looming man, green eyes drenched with tears, his lips trembling as he could only muster a nod. [All players, scenario one will commence now. Good luck and try not to die.] —— When nothing is as it seems - who can you trust? ML: Not the author, that’s for sure. The synopsis is just one huge clickbait- *Author smacks this insolent child with a hardcover edition of the Bible*: Quiet, you! Or I won’t let you appear even after the halfway mark! MC: … You evil bish!! —- T/W: This is mature content. A sprinkle of horror, a teaspoon of gore, topped with a handful of clownery. Some papapa is added as a garnish at the end. Consume at your own digression. A/N: This is an original work by LinShui. The cover is not mine, as I have negative skills in any illustrative art. Will commission for a cover when I’m no longer a broke bish. Do let me know if this is your art and you want to take it down, thanks! #unrequitedlove
LinShui · 184.4K Views

Cathulhu Online, MUNYA!

[WPC#270 - Silver Place Winner] In the age of superheroes, Miao Xiaomao was one of the mediocre commoners, who had no superpower. Xiaomao and his senior cat died in an accident. But when he came back to his sense again, Miao Xiaomao found himself regressing to the past. Using his knowledge from the future, Xiaomao invested in the VRMMO game early to prepare for the new age - The Age of Superhuman and Cultivators. He would soon find himself integrating with his in-game character to awaken his superpower and become one of the superhumans. What about his character's choice? A cat dad like him couldn't possibly play a normal game character! "I'M A SUPERHERO, MUNYA!" ...... Q&A because synopsis is too mainstream. Question: What should you know before you read? Answer: This novel shares the same universe as my previous work [Villain Cultivator]. You may find people, names, places, and backstory of things from the other story, and some readers may comment on the things you don't know. Question: Should I be concerned about this? Answer: No. Even if you don't know the background, you can still enjoy the novel as the story will eventually reveal everything to the readers. Question: What should I expect from this novel? Answer: I'll list it for you. - Human MC's story in the real world. - Fluffy, naughty, and obnoxious non-humanoid MC's story in the VRMMO game world. - Weak OP Protagonist to OMGWTFLMAO-OP Protagonist - Munya munya munya munya munya! - Cryptocurrency, NFT technologies, and crypto investment. - Game Character Integration - Superpower and Super Heroes in the real world. - Cultivators, spirit stones. - Memes, parodies, stereotypes, comedy - Plot Twists... MANY Plot Twists.
DamnPlotArmor · 2M Views

Contact Alpha - A story of sci fi fantasy

The United Stars of Gaia, an advanced space faring human civilization comes across a fantasy like planet in their journey to explore the star. This is the first time mankind had ever come across an alien civilization. An observatory orbital station was built to study the primitive civilization without exposing themselves to the local population. After half an Earth year of observation the station got a visit from an official and his escort fleets. But while the transport ships were in the process of docking with the station, something went wrong. *...THIS IS AN EMERGENCY. ALL PERSONEL ARE TO EVACUATE THE ORBITAL PLATFORM AND HEAD FOR THE NEAREST ESCAPE PODS. THIS IS AN EMERGENCY. ALL PERSONEL...* "What's going on? where's the head scientist?" "Sir , that would be me. Something went wrong with the gravity anchor and the station is falling, fast." "Can we do something about it?" "Sir please evacuate. We tried our best but the station is beyond saving now. We will be descending onto the atmosphere" And with that, a story of an advance interstellar civilization interacting with their first magical alien civilization begins, along with all of their mysteries and secrets. Disclaimer: The work is original, not a parody or a fanfiction of any existing series, only images belong to their respective creator. If there are any images or videos that I made I will inform. I'm in the process of porting the story from Wattpad to other sites like Royalroads and Scribblehub. The fullest version is currently on Wattpad. There may be, just maybe a little bit, but there may be R18 content in the future, both gore, violent and sexual. So please keep this in mind. I will however notify if there are such chapters. Finally, there will be grim-dark content or at least mentions of grim-dark in this story. Be advised. The story is also available on other sites like Wattpad, Scribble Hub and Royal Road.
NickolegKeiige · 22.3K Views

Story of an Hour

"The Story of an Hour" is a short story written by Kate Chopin on April 19, 1894. It was originally published in Vogue on December 6, 1894, as "The Dream of an Hour". It was later reprinted in St. Louis Life on January 5, 1895, as "The Story of an Hour". Kate Chopin also US:born Katherine February 8, 1851 – August 22, 1904)[4] was an American author of short stories and novels based in Louisiana. She is considered by scholars[5] to have been a forerunner of American 20th-century feminist authors of Southern or Catholic background, such as Zelda Fitzgerald, and is one of the most frequently read and recognized writers of Louisiana Creole heritage. She is best known today for her 1899 novel The Awakening. Of maternal French and paternal Irish descent, Chopin was born in St. Louis, Missouri. She married and moved with her husband to New Orleans. They later lived in the country in Cloutierville, Louisiana. From 1892 to 1895, Chopin wrote short stories for both children and adults that were published in such national magazines as Atlantic Monthly, Vogue, The Century Magazine, and The Youth's Companion. Her stories aroused controversy because of her subjects and her approach; they were condemned as immoral by some critics. Her major works were two short story collections and two novels. The collections are Bayou Folk (1894) and A Night in Acadie (1897). Her important short stories included "Désirée's Baby" (1893), a tale of miscegenation in antebellum Louisiana,[6] "The Story of an Hour" (1894),[7] and "The Storm" (1898).[6] "The Storm" is a sequel to "At the Cadian Ball (1892)," which appeared in her first collection of short stories, Bayou Folk.[6] Chopin also wrote two novels: At Fault (1890) and The Awakening (1899), which are set in New Orleans and Grand Isle, respectively. The characters in her stories are usually residents of Louisiana, and many are Creoles of various ethnic or racial backgrounds. Many of her works are set in Natchitoches in north-central Louisiana, a region where she lived. Within a decade of her death, Chopin was widely recognized as one of the leading writers of her time.[8] In 1915, Fred Lewis Pattee wrote, "some of [Chopin's] work is equal to the best that has been produced in France or even in America. [She displayed] what may be described as a native aptitude for narration amounting almost to genius."[8]
Rustum_Ali_Patan · 1.5K Views
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