Weeb Xd

Mature content: ‘You are not my craving my dear, you are my obsession.’ “ She was our light and we were her darkness—- and just like every opposites we were obsessed with the idea of having her.” The Evil Empress, the one whose life was filled with debauchery and betrayal to her mates was supposed to die tonight. Being the Empress of the Dragniere Empire and the mother to all dragons, she was supposed to live a life where she lived for her people and the country, her exquisite powers were alone enough to make her the ruler of the entire continent and with her face that was as beautiful as a shining pearl in the moonlight, with hair as fine as Pima, and her curves so luscious that any man would have died of desire with just one glimpse. With powers that were beyond humans, shrouded with the air of aristocracy and with a personality that was as cruel as Medusa, The Evil Empress continued to rule over the people of her Empire with her tyranny. Brianna Cage, nicknamed ‘ Bree, The hellion’ for the convenience of her acquaintances was a rowdy young woman. She had a fierce sense of justice, she was dependable and despite not being the most beautiful woman in her department, she was sought out by a lot of men because of her alluring nature, she rejected them all because in truth she was in love with —— all the Daddies in the comic books she has read. Behind her aloof and dependable persona resided a Weeb who was always cheering on the characters of her favourite books. One day she came upon the book ‘ The Maid’s route of survival of the fittest’ and decided to read it just for the heck of it since the Empress shared the same name as her. But soon Bree found out that the Empress was the Villainess, she even betrayed her mates one by one and what was even more gut-wrenching she was killed by her mates! All for the sake of the maid who reincarnated into the book with a system to help her. Bree though angry decided to throw the book at the back of her head but oddly enough the book vanished and Bree found herself waking up in the room of the Evil Empress just three weeks before she was executed by her mates! Startled but not having the time to freak out, Bree started to take care of everything that the Evil Empress has done wrong. She thought that she would be able to live a peaceful life away from her bloodthirsty mates who didn’t seem too fond of her. But unfortunately, things didn’t go as she planned as five sets of eyes fell on her despite all the precautions she has taken against them. And once those eyes locked on her, they refused to let go of their possessiveness. The Evil Empress was theirs, to begin with who dares take her away?

Loose cultivator Shi Lang gradually found himself in the realm of invincibility. However, when he finally tried to ascend to the higher realm, the spirit of the world was nearly exhausted. So, between his ascension to a new world or the well-being of his home, he chose the latter and sacrificed his life to save the world. Nobody knew what he gave up for the world, and he told no one. Although his sacrifice had gone unsung, there was still someone who witnessed everything. A treasured artifact he carried on his body preserved his soul and let it escape a tragic end. Eons passed. The human race stepped out from the age of cultivation into an age of stellar conquest. The spirit energy in the world was now scarce, but humans found other means to excel. In this highly-advanced time, Shi Lang's soul has found a chance to be reborn. What happens when an ancient cultivator that neared the level of a deity before his first death gets a second chance at life in the space age? ... Cover Credits: ropreker#8513(discord) Fonts and Final editing credits: Not gonna tell y'all. XD

The Prince of Macedonia wakes up from a nightmare, Zeus has given him a vision, a grave threat from the West, one that he has to prepare for, but how can he convince his father, his peers that this is a good choice? Zeus isn't even that trustworthy actually hehehe (sorry XD

She, disappointed by her own family, forced to marry a cold CEO. Him, always like a block of ice, not showing any weakness or emotions. Who'll win ? Who'll fall' first ? Author : " If you want to know the answer, then, read it ". XD

In the gritty slums, 17-year-old Jamie struggles with the harsh realities of life as a homeless orphan. When he crosses paths with Dekam, a washed-up boxing champion, Jamie reluctantly agrees to train, seeing it as a way to make easy money. As Jamie navigates the world of boxing, he forms a bond with Dekam while grappling with his past and the temptations of street life. Alongside his new friends—Jackie, Koko, and other local kids—Jamie finds himself drawn into petty crimes to survive. But when their antics lead to an unexpected encounter with corrupt cops, Jamie discovers the power of fighting not just for survival, but for respect and a shot at a better future. Will Jamie embrace his potential as a boxer? Join Jamie on his journey of self-discovery, loyalty, and the quest for redemption in a world where every punch counts. In Jamie: Road to Glory

I'm currently stockpiling chapters! This is my first time doing a System-based novel, so I'll be progressively getting better along the way. Thank you for your understanding XD✨ --------------------------- When Theodore Nevan is forced into the Reincarnation Cycle via Truck-Kun's almighty hand, he is given the option to be reincarnated as the son of two Primordial deities, who convinces him to agree to their conditions by promising three wishes each. Theodore, now Theo Kraven, must gather his power and make powerful allies, because he's not the only Primordial Spawn alive and not all Primordial Spawns are friendly. And, with his kind being hunted by an unknown, mysterious force, he must do so fast. Wielding the powers of both the Death & Destruction at his literal fingertips, Theo Kraven is out to get stronger and gather his own forces, eliminating any who dare get in his way. He will be called a villain. He will be called a tyrant. He will be called despicable. But, at the end of the day, he will have the power to back his actions. And, like his predecessors before him, he will learn that his sanity... is a ticking time bomb! No matter how chill and creative he sees himself today — he will have to learn that the cost of power is one's sanity, and he'll have to learn this fast, too, or else he'll be too far gone to properly defend himself when the enemy comes knocking at his door. And the worst part? The enemy is already at the gate! [Ding! Direwolf Alpha Tamed.] [Ding! Progenitor Werewolf Corpse Summoned!] [Using Absolute Synthesis to Create A New Summon...]: [Ding! New Summons Created!] [Direwolf Evolved Into: Lycaon-Fenrir Progenitor Werewolf!] ------------------------------------------- 35 Power Stones = 1 Chapter Extra 55 Power Stones = 4 Chapters Extra 20 Shares = 2 Chapter Extra I will post chapters twice 3-4 days a week, with a bonus chapter every other 3 Fridays! Let's try to get this in rankings, my peops, so share, read and enjoy. And please vote golden tickets and power stone, and please don't forget to send gifts if you want, thanx XD!!!

Little bit of a warning, the main character is shameless and crude!!! -------------------------------------------------------- When Blake Orpheus learns he's the son of the most powerful primordial god of darkness, Erebos, he must journey on a path with newly made allies to help unlock the mysteries of his birth and homeworld, but the journey will not be easy. As he enters the world of Legacies, Great Houses, Demigods and Cultivators, where even divinity is achievable, anything is possible. With all the Great Houses of this world gunning to get their hands on him, Blake must investigate the mysterious event of the Sealing and how he's connected to it. And, when demigods and cultivators start disappearing from the one place he could call safe, he'll have to be careful, especially with the forces of chaos on his scent. They would give anything to kill the heir to the throne of Darkness & Shadow. This is a dog eat dog world, where the weak gets crumpled and the strong rule supreme on thrones of gold and power. Does Blake have what it takes to reach the top and vanquish his enemies? Or will he, like so many before him, fall victim to the strong and corrupt? Only one way to find out! ----------------------------------------------------------- 35 Power Stones = 1 Chapter Extra 55 Power Stones = 4 Chapters Extra 20 Shares = 2 Chapter Extra I will post chapters twice 3-4 days a week, with a bonus chapter every other 3 Fridays! Let's try to get this in rankings, my peops, so share, read and enjoy. And please vote golden tickets and power stone, and please don't forget to send gifts if you want, thanx XD!!!

—WSA 2025 Entry— -The well-known characters of your favourite series get into orgy-In a world where anime universes collide, an omnipotent, perverted god known as The Great Weeb Overlord grows bored of endless power fantasies and shonen battles. Instead of another tournament arc, he decides to host the ultimate crossover event—one fueled by raw passion, unfiltered ecchi energy, and the deepest desires of fandom itself. When Kazuya, an average, luckless otaku, is inexplicably summoned as the "Chosen One" to oversee this legendary gathering of flesh, he finds himself surrounded by the most iconic waifus and husbandos of all time—Asuka, Rem, Bulma, Zero Two, Hinata, Erza, Akeno, Saber, Makima, and many more. Even some of the most unexpected faces (yes, even from wholesome anime) are caught in the gravitational pull of this sinful singularity. As the Ultimate Fan Service begins, Kazuya must navigate the chaotic pleasure-fest while avoiding jealous yanderes, tsundere slap-fests, and the terrifying wrath of overpowered shonen protagonists who refuse to share the spotlight. But with reality itself warping under the influence of peak degeneracy, Kazuya soon realizes there may be no escape… and worse—he might actually enjoy it. Will he survive this NSFW isekai experience? Or will he be consumed by the horny abyss? One thing’s for sure—this is not your average anime crossover.

In a world invaded by portals to other worlds, some humans obtained a power called System, which allowed them to level up and become stronger. Now a new career existed: the Adventurer, one who ventures into these portals to complete quests given by the System. An Italian boy, Samuele Rua, received this power and now had to become an Adventurer and venture inside the portals, leveling up and becoming stronger. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I apologise from the beginning for the bad writing, bad grammar and all the bad things in this book. This is my first attempt at writing an... original... story. Yeah... Anyway! If you have some time to spare, please give this book a chance and comment with what you like and dislike about it. Any constructive criticism is appreciated. If you find this book disgusting, well... I don't blame you xD. if you have come this far and still have the guts to read this story, good luck to all your brave hearts! P.S. Cover image not mine!!!

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******** (WARNING: This novel’s MC is Laurence’s disciple, since both of them love to cuss at everyone’s faces…. Just kidding! xD xD. Just like my other work that has a warning at the top… So, please read at your own risk! ^_^) (Note: This novel will undergo revisions from the start. Thank you! ^_^) ********* Not all villains are evil. Sometimes, their experiences and how others treated them shaped them into what they are today. ********* “How amusing! Do you really think that being labeled as a [tyrant], a [bully], and a [villain] would be that outstanding?! Why don’t you come here right now and let me punch you in the face so that you can wake up from your f*cking delusional sh*t!” ********* In his first life, for some unknown reason, he was betrayed, framed, and stripped of his status as a noble and labeled him as a “traitor” or in the worst case, a “villain”. Now, as he faced execution and prepared to die when suddenly an unknown entity called [system] offered him a chance to be a dimensional traveler, a being who transverse through the stars and space to countless worldlines in order to complete various tasks that was assigned to them. The system also promised him to grant his greatest desire should he ever consent to be bound by the [system]. With no other choice, he accepted the entity’s offer and after millennium years’ worth of transmigration, for some unknown reason, the system prompted him to be reincarnated back to his first life that he had forsaken…. As the “villainous” Third Young Master of Marquis Chevalier Household from Stellarus Empire. ********* Photo not mine. Credits to the owner.

Updates @ 21:00 (+8 gmt) Leander is a healer. But he is not like those healers who have it all: the fame, the money and the harems. Because he is chubby. Ranked only F, he struggles with life as a new recruit in the Adventurer's Guild. Until he sees a poster that changes his life and sends him on a journey to lose weight, get the fame, money and the harem. Except, his harem will be full of men. But, such is fate. This is a slow burn BL harem with dungeon delving. It follows the old adventurer's guild troupes with some twists and turns. A journey from zero to hero, one could say. (I am using this book to lie to my brain that losing weight is possible with the methods written in the many self-help books I have been reading recently. If you need to shed some fat, you might use Anti-cake Dungeon Delving the same way. A little hope never hurt nobody.) Updated daily. The MC becomes a dungeon core going chapter 86 and forward. You can find the story only on Webnovel. (Fingers crossed that no one will translate it into Russian like the other one! XD) The sequel, Life Skilling, is also complete, and will be posted right after the ending of Anti-cake. A peek in the lives of those who live in the world shaped by the Try Hard Party. A funny slice of life.

"Wu Long, the God of Pleasure, has fallen as he failed to breakthrough." This news have shocked all of the Seven Boundless Worlds. Meanwhile, a sixteen-year-old disciple of a dual cultivation sect was startled awake from a coma, and after some moments of calming down and gathering his thoughts, a dangerous light flickered deep in his eyes: "Jun Shaoshan, I will climb back to the top and make you pay for everything, no one has ever been safe after offending me, Wu Long!" -------------- Dual cultivation is a method of cultivation that can be seen described in a lot of cultivation novels where a man and a woman cultivates together by having sex. -------------- ***DIscord Link: https://discord.gg/JfSRtJVXTd The Image on the cover is AI-generated with some minor adjustments and text editing done over it. Please check the auxiliary chapter with Frequently Asked Questions since there may be some answers to the questions you might want to ask. If you want to ask questions regarding the novel before reading you can do so in the comment section of the said auxiliary chapter. If you have posted a review and it is not appearing on the novel page and not changing the novel score, it may have stuck in the system (happened in the past and occasionally happening now). Please comment under the FAQ auxiliary chapter mentioned above if you notice this happen. I can usually contact support in daytime on weekdays and the problem is fixed within days and the 'stuck' reviews appear on the page. Thank you XD -------------- ***The explicit chapters will be marked in the chapter name after the chapter number as (R18) and will contain no crucial plot, only explicit scene, so if you want to read it as a novel without explicit scenes you absolutely can by just skipping the explicit chapters. Though as a disclaimer: dual cultivation IS the theme of the novel so there will still be some provocative or slightly explicit content in the normal chapters, but not full-on long explicit scenes. ***Since it seems that there are a lot of people that are very particular about what they want I will put here some of the things to expect so that it is easier for people to decide if they want to read this or not: - NO yaoi, NO yuri, NO incest ; - NO rape ( it may be mentioned, but only as a thing that exists, not in relation to any particular character ); - MC's heroines will NEVER cheat on him; - MC's heroines will NOT ALWAYS have V cards (but there will be a lot of them who do); These are all non-negotiable so if you cannot tolerate a novel that adheres to any of the above sentences you should probably skip this one. !!! WARNING (ADVERTISEMENT) there will be MILFs. XD

A weeb in the 25th century was very excited about the release of the next installation of his favourite vr game "Babylon." He wasn't a die hard fanatic of the game just a casual player. {All chapters shall be free} {Cover is mine and Webnovels. I think}

A normal British teenager with the most unconventional opinions, that are sometimes regarded as "Immodern" or "Old-fashioned" gets teleported into the Naruto World but a thousand years into the past, during Kaguya's rise to Goddess Status. A/N: This novel has Yaoi on its tags as the Male MC is bisexual, so if you get squeamish from reading men being lovey-dovey with men then this is not for you XD

Seong Yu-jin, who was an ordinary person, was recognized for his potential as a hunter and entered the Hunter Department of Kookchon University. However, even at the age of 21, his ability showed no signs of awakening, and he became the only non-awakened person in the department. However, one day, while lying in bed and thinking about going to school, Seong Yu-jin succeeded in awakening his ability to play. Suddenly, information about playful life entered his head, and according to that information, Seong Yu-jin clicked on an app that appeared on his smartphone. After that, he invested 5 points to increase the size of his penis to 16 cm and slowly began to examine his ability. Then, through a random draw, he obtained several items and a full recovery skill. After that, he confirmed that his ability was the ability to enter a creation. He chose SV-7495, a pornographic video he had seen a week ago, and entered the creation.

"Yuri, Pringles! We're out of Pringles!" "Great! 8 boxes of ramen! No, 10 boxes in exchange!" "Cola is clearly a product of the devil!" Cider, cola, cookies, ramen. I don't have any, so I'll make them.

"There are two kinds of magic. normal magic and spirit magic. Where normal magic has its limitations, spirit magic is only restricted by imagination." Noah once lost everything dear to him due to his spirit magic, something only ten people in the world could have at the same time. He climbed to the top of the palace of time in hopes of reclaiming something or simply dying in the process. However, he somehow managed to go to past with the help of the guardian of time and reincarnated as his eighteen year old self. Now the same magic that caused Noah's demise would be his greatest weapon as he corrects all the wrong. And all of it starts with his mother... --- Note: The major focus of the novel will be on romance but it's only half the truth. There will be action and mystery too because no novel is fun without twists xD It's a harem novel too so expect the unexpected. Also, spirit magician is a term that refers to not only mc but a few others too. It will be explained in the novel in under 50 chapters.

She had mountains of reason to say no to him, but he keeps coming back, no matter how many times she rejected him. ******************************* Sneak Peek: “I HAVE TRIED! PLAN A, PLAN B, PLAN C, PLAN D & PLAN E! But Nothing is Working! Why does he still want to marry me?!” ——by FL Inner Voice ******************************* Synopsis: After waking up as the villainess in a romance novel that she hated called “I love you, my prince.” Ms.Ivy Augustine, her villainess name, finds ways to escape her fate from execution at age 17. The strong and sensible girl vows that she will not be like the villainess in the story who loves the prince too much, which will lead to her doom. She develops mountains of reasons why she doesn’t want to marry the prince, but no matter how hard she tried, the prince kept proposing to her, and disasters kept following her as if the author was forcing her to follow the plot. The novel that she thought was predictable and full of cliches cause her to wonder, will she ever be able to change her fate? ******************************* How did I become the villainess of this cliche romantic novel!! I reincarnated into the romance novel that I read last night, and I skip through the chapters and only read the crucial parts. The villainess will be beheaded at the age of 17 because she loves the prince too much. I felt relief because I hate the idea of marrying the prince. There is a mountain of reasons why I don't want to! It's just not practical! "Oh, no, his pheromone attack! It's is very strong this time, but I will endure it! " "She smells nice. I want to keep her by my side forever." ******************************* Note to readers Publishing Schedule 2 chapter - Every Sat & Sun Sometimes more if I feel like it XD What can you expect: This novel contains lots of romance and adventure combined. It's a slow burn novel. ************************************** Ps. I do not own this artwork, full credits to the owner. Double Ps. I also don't control the pricing. Triple Ps. There may be a little R-18 content after chapter 60. Due to unforeseen circumstances, I have to postpone my work until my health is better. I have been pilling the stories and hope to publish it the end of the year. Thank you for your continuos support.

Your average weeb and novel enthusiast gets reincarnated and makes his personal ideologies about the supremacy of AoE spells everybody else’s problem. After all what AoE mage hasn’t harmed a few innocent bystanders? This is going to be about a semi-crazy mc going around the multiverse. The first world will definitely be self made then I’ll decide if I wanna do that again or turn it into a fan-fic multiverse. There is a system but it’s essentially just to make my life easier. And no harem instead we’re gonna get a f*ckboy mindset till he finds his one true love or something equally corny. English is my first language I’m just super new to writing and hence something like grammar flow in conversations may suck. But I will hopefully improve given time. I have literally no plan for this and my update schedule will be completely random at the beginning till I get comfortable writing.

In a world overrun by monsters, every person has a chance to awaken. Some with a unique skill—powerful and versatile, but only as effective as its wielder’s choices. For Sebastian, a young man with fractured memories of another life, this is a chance to start anew. Will he use what he learns to protect… or destroy? Embark on a journey of magic, monsters, and self-discovery as Sebastian navigates a realm full of wonder and danger. Author’s Note: The first chapters may feel a bit puzzling, but I promise this story is worth your time. Expect a tale rich with fantasy, magic, and the raw struggles of life. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The first 15 Chapters will create the personality of the MC and hasn't magical stuff... But believe me that you will be suprised by the story Like & comment XD Eclipse_Lure

Born as a Legacy of the proud and powerful Drigin family, MorDrigin was a disappoinment in that he never bonded with any Ethoses. At age 15, he had his final chance to bond. Heading into the world below the floating city, he searched for his Ethos, only to find Seven Legendary Ethoses, which retaliated. They stole his sister and killed millions, as they threatened to bring the human race to its knees. With everything gone to hell, MorDrigin will find himself searching for his stolen sister and bonding with an Ethos in the most unconventional ways, which in turn will unlock a system hidden to humans. Standing in the midst of uncertainty and a ploy which goes far beyond anyone, MorDrigin will have to fight through all of this madness to save his sister and those remaining to him who he loves. *** Hello, thank you for stopping by, if you decide to pick the novel up then get ready for a great adventure. Please help me make this book the number one trending on Webnovel. Is that too much to ask? Nah, not for the quality of the book XD Please support with powerstones and golden tickets. 50 PS and I'll upload an additional chapter. 100 PS and I'll upload two additional chapters. 200 PS will be three. 400 PS will be four.

"It was about the time I was pinching a fox-girl’s nipples in order to kill a minotaur that I realized how very weird my life had become." I was just like you—living a totally normal, loner weeb life—until I got transported into this weird harem world, where I'm needed for my magical powers of perversion?! And now I have to help stop the terrible Demon Lord who's been rampaging around the kingdom for a decade because she can't have a decent orgasm?! Seriously, what the hell's wrong with this world?!

What happens when 19 year old weeb loses every reason to live? what happens when such person gets transported into a cruel fantasy world with a total stranger? will this broken soul entangled in strange twists of fate find the reason to live again? P.S. Warning! this story contains a lot of physical/emotional trauma, suicidal thoughts, self destructive thoughts and emotional comfort as well as loss of loved ones.

#dotingmalelead #infrastructure #RPG #OPMc (Caution: Don't read while you're drinking. Author is not responsible for choking incident due to excessive happiness. XD Just sharing good vibes. If you're down and feeling sad, read my novel!) Li Chunhua never expected she would be transported in another world after she was reading an odd book she found in the Sect's Library. By the time she opened her eyes, her mind was instilled with memories of another girl whose appearance and name resembled hers. She actually became the vicious cannon fodder in that male lead angst novel she read. Faced with the future of miserable death, Chunhua decided to stay away from the male lead and the supporting characters and decided to live low-key. Thanks to her koi physique her road to a comfortable life was smooth sailing. When others are still starving by the lack of food, Chunhua had already started farming and rearing live stocks. When others are still without a proper shelter, she was already building roads. Although she was only eating her terrible cooking, her life was already good! [Congratulations for upgrading your thatched cottage to Level 1 log cabin.] [Congratulations for upgrading your Level 1 log cabin to Level 2 stone house.] [Congratulations...] Everything was was going well until she picked up an unconscious man covered in dirt in the forest. She always believe in karmic conditioning and therefore took care of him until he was back on his feet. Until one day, he told her his true name. Li Chunhua was dumbfounded. No way, the man I saved was actually the male lead! Is it too late to throw him back to the forest again? A certain someone's expression darkened and threw her on the bed. "You dare!"

Moved to a new link, check out my profile guys, you'll find it there : XD

The only humans left in the universe... A budding world... The start of everything for Earth... Just with the Will to Survive.... A bright and cheeky smile... Proudly introducing myself to the whole universe, "Hi, I am from Earth." ------------------------------------------------------------------- Please be kind and above all be generous with you criticism, request and obviously praise. A simple promise to make it enjoyable. Will hope to stack a lot of chapters before publishing and making a patreon. I am knee deep in loans. Welp. XD. Love you all in advance.

In a world filled with deceit and treachery, Huang Zhiyun, the second Demonic Emperor, once placed his trust and affection in a child he considered his own. Yet, what he believed to be his greatest bond turned out to be the very poison that led to his downfall and ruin Consumed by betrayal and driven to the brink of self-destruction, Zhiyun welcomed death’s embrace. But just when the darkness closed in, an unknown being intervened. “It would be a shame to let someone as intriguing as you simply perish,” it murmured, a wicked, formless smile stretching across the void. Awakening in the frail body of a crippled child, Zhiyun found himself back at square one. But weakness did not frighten him—armed with vengeance and unshakable resolve, he vowed to climb back to the top and exact brutal retribution on those who had wronged him. “Yuzhe, Celestial Kings… wait for me. I will show you the true meaning of suffering.” Yet, as Zhiyun treads the path of vengeance, he begins to confront truths he never anticipated. The fragility of mortals… “To think I can die just from hunger, interesting…” The complexity of human emotions… “Am I poisoned? Why is my heart beating so fast?” And the profound meaning of the Dao… “Elder, please make me your disciple.” Will Zhiyun reclaim his throne and fulfill his thirst for revenge? Or will his journey lead him to uncover something far greater than power itself? Follow the rise of a ruthless Demonic Emperor as he is reborn—not only to seek vengeance, but to face a challenge he never foresaw: the hidden truths of the world and the uncharted depths of his own soul. ———— Authors note: Hi mina saaannn! so happy to be here! this is my first official book. I technically dont have any goal in writing this novel, I just want to get them out of my head or else ill go crazy crazy ahahaha … xD Anyway! im not very good in making a summary and book cover so please excuse me. I hope this does not discourage any of you to read the book and give it a shot. Thank you! :D

Yuki Tanaka, a shut-in weeb, gets summoned to another world with the worst skill ever: "Delayed Imitation," which copies weaker versions of other people's powers. The kingdom decides she's useless, kicks her out with no gear, and wishes her luck (aka, certain death.) Teaming up with a kind-hearted knight who pities her, Yuki tries to avoid the Demon King, survive attacks from over-the-top enemies, and deal with a narcissistic isekai rival who thinks he's her nemesis-even though she has no idea who he is. It's less "epic hero journey" and more "how not to die in a ridiculous fantasy world."