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Stray Critique

L'Amour d'un Lycan

``` TERMINÉ ! Extrait : Il y a un an, Raine a été libérée de l'institution mentale et a dû vivre dans l'orphelinat. Ce n'était pas le meilleur endroit. Surtout pas pour quelqu'un comme elle. Jusqu'à cette nuit fatidique où elle l'a rencontré. *** Il arrêta la voiture. L'étreinte sur la couverture se resserra alors que Raine se demandait si elle avait fait quelque chose de mal. Elle le sentait lorsque Torak tendait la main vers elle. Va-t-il me frapper ? Raine frissonna à cette pensée. Torak repoussa la capuche de sa tête et replaça doucement ses cheveux derrière son oreille. "Ne fais pas ça." Il dit fermement, "Je veux te voir, ne te cache pas..." ************** "L'esprit de l'ange gardien insufflera une nouvelle vie à l'enfant humain. Trois anges gardiens naîtront de nouveau dans le monde terrestre et vous trois serez leurs protecteurs." "Protecteurs !?" s'exclama Jedrek. Finalement, il s'arrêta de marcher et se retourna pour regarder la déesse lunaire de loin, ses yeux luisants de colère rouge. Son loup était furieux. "Pourquoi penses-tu que nous aiderons ?" demanda Kace en rétrécissant ses yeux noirs d'obsidienne, son loup prenant le contrôle de lui. Il était le plus jeune des trois et le moins colérique d'entre eux. Les trois étaient maudits par Sélène à cause de leur action féroce pour acquérir un pouvoir suprême et une autorité. La déesse lunaire ne les a pas bénis avec une âme sœur comme punition de leur manière atroce et les a forcés à s'impliquer dans cette guerre mortelle avec les démons. "Vous allez nous transformer en esclaves pour ces créatures maladives !?" demanda Torak avec incrédulité. "N'as-tu pas peur que nous les brisions en deux ?" L'ange gardien était si fragile et eux, en tant que lycanthropes, n'appréciaient pas les faiblesses. "Non, vous ne le ferez pas." dit Sélène avec patience. "Vous ne serez pas leurs esclaves ni ne leur ferez de mal, vous les chérirez de toutes les manières possibles." Jedrek rit menaçant en entendant cela, ils se fichaient de la résurrection de la bête, une fois qu'elle traversait leur territoire, avec ou sans l'ange gardien, il déchirerait leur corps en morceaux. "Je serai la dernière personne qu'ils verront, une fois que je les trouverai." Il faisait référence à l'ange gardien et au démon. Mais, la prochaine voix de Sélène était empreinte de bonne humeur lorsqu'elle parla. "Tu ne blesseras pas ton âme sœur." ============================ Session 1 (chapitre 1 - 394) : Torak Donovan - Raine (terminée). Session 2 (chapitre 395 - 628) : Kace Donovan - Espérance (terminée) Session 3 (chapitre 629 - 1083) : Jedrek Donovan - Lilac (terminée) Session 4 (chapitre 1084 - en cours) : Histoires annexes ============================ Ceci est une histoire de loup-garou et bien sûr de la fantasy ! Comme tout le monde a sa propre version de la vie surnaturelle, voici que j'essaie d'écrire la mienne. Si vous avez lu d'autres histoires de loups-garous, vous remarquerez qu'il y a des similitudes et des différences. ============================ ***Attention ! L'anglais n'est pas ma langue maternelle, il est donc possible que vous trouviez des erreurs grammaticales (je ne l'ai pas fait intentionnellement), si cela vous met mal à l'aise, veuillez me le faire savoir afin que je puisse corriger cela. *Vous êtes prévenus ^^ Toute critique constructive est la bienvenue ! .......................................................................................... ##Rencontrez-moi sur Instagram : jikan_yo_tomare ##Couverture par : @Gisel.arts Découvrez mes autres histoires : **PURPLE DAWN TILL DUSK: dearest through the time **THE STORY OF DUSK ```
jikanyotomare · 119.3K Views

Le périple d'Atticus : Réincarné dans une aire de jeux

Protagoniste travailleur : Oui, Distribution de personnages intéressants : Oui, Création de monde : Oui, Protagoniste surpuissant : Oui, Transmigration : Oui. Atticus a affronté le pire jour de sa vie : son cœur a été brisé, et il a été soudainement tué chez lui, pour se réveiller dans un domaine magique en tant qu'héritier de l'une des familles les plus puissantes du domaine humain. Poussé par la détermination, il a juré de devenir plus fort et de prendre sa revanche sur quiconque l'a tué et l'a amené dans ce monde, quel qu'en soit le prix. N/D 1. Il n'y a pas de harem. 2. Le MC se soucie uniquement de lui-même et de sa famille. Il ne se gêne pas pour franchir la limite si cela signifie qu'il peut garder sa famille et lui-même en sécurité. 3. Il a une personnalité extrêmement vengeresse. Quelle que soit la raison ou ce que vous traversez, ça lui est égal. Ce qui compte, c'est que vous lui avez fait mal, et c'est tout ce dont il a besoin. 4. Il n'y aura pas de 'dissimulation de force'. Il sera prudent sur ce qu'il montre, mais il ne perdra pas s'il peut l'éviter. 5. Le MC travaille dur pour sa force ; ne vous laissez pas tromper par l'étiquette du système. 6. Enfin, si vous avez la moindre affection pour ce roman, donnez-moi tout, hahaha. Je plaisante, s'il vous plaît donnez-moi des pierres de pouvoir et laissez des critiques. Merci ! Discord : https://discord.gg/t7z25ZzKX3
RealmWeaver · 65.7K Views

My Blacksmith System: Transforming my Weapons into Beautiful Maidens

"Kill me..." The man spoke with a faint voice. He was chained to the ground while three glowing figures stared down at him. "The boy has potential." "Yes potential." "I agree." "Maybe he can withstand the vessel." "The council has come to an agreement." Rashin was then asked a simple question... [Do you wish to live or die?] "Kill me you assholes!" Those were this last words before his head went rolling on the ground. A hundred years passed and Rashin finds himself alive in the future. It turned out he was saved by a stray angel, and was granted a powerful energy that allowed him to stand on equal footing with the monsters that once wanted to take over earth. In his new future, the world was being run by those very same monsters, and they now claimed the title of "gods." Beings forced to be worshiped buy humans. Or at least, until Rashin arrived. [Blacksmith System activated. Welcome host.] [Initializing core functions... Complete.] [Congratulations, you have gained a new blue paint (Large sword.)] [Stella blade has passed all requirements to evolve.] [Evolving to human form can now be processed.] [Congratulations, you have gained a unique core, your weapons can now undergo fusion.] [Stella deserves an reward...] [Kiss her lips.] [DO YOU REFUSE?] Having a system that allowed him to craft weapons of all kind, Rashin enters this new world trying to survive while also remembering part of his memories. Not just that, he can also turn every weapon he makes into beautiful overpowered maidens capable of killing the Hakiaas aka fallen ones.
Introverted_Writer · 1K Views

Accidentally Summoning the God of the Underworld

DISCLAIMER: THIS BOOK CONTAINS MATURE ********************************** Hades smirked, then leaned back, pulling her fully into his lap. She gasped in surprise, her arms instinctively wrapping around his neck for balance. “If you’re going to tease me, you might as well do it properly,” he said, his deep voice filled with mischief. “Oh?” she challenged, raising an eyebrow. He leaned in and kissed her lips. She moaned against his lips, her pussy beginning to throb and she did her best to squeeze her thighs shut and hide the fact that she was overwhelmingly horny. Her body was begging to be touched. His cool skin felt amazing against hers and she wanted him to touch the one area that needed it the most, one that he had made sure he didn't go too near with. Hades hands slid down to her ass and squeezed gently, she moaned against his mouth and tightened her grip in his hair, never wanting his lips to stray from her skin. "Hades..." she moaned needingly as he moved his lips down her neck. "Yes, princess?" he murmured softly against the sensitive skin of her neck. "More, please." She begged and he nipped at her skin. "Tell me exactly what you want." he said to her. "Touch me, please. I need you to touch me." She moaned. ********************************** When Aurelia stumbles upon an ancient summoning ritual and performs it out of curiosity, she unknowingly binds herself to Hades, the brooding King of the Underworld. Marked by their connection, she’s thrust into a world of gods and immortals where she doesn’t belong and where her heart becomes her greatest weakness. As Aurelia navigates the pain of unrequited emotions and the perilous politics of the divine, she uncovers the truth behind the mark she bears a power that could tip the scales of fate itself. With gods, love, and destiny at war, Aurelia must decide whether to embrace the bond that has chained her to Hades or break free from a world that was never meant for her.
StarlitScrolls · 6.3K Views

The Writer’s Paradox

Max Carter, a struggling writer with untapped potential, discovers an ancient pen and notebook buried in the forgotten corners of his university library. To his surprise, the notebook activates a LitRPG interface called the Nexus System, revealing a startling truth: countless fictional worlds have begun to collapse. Villains have won in stories where they shouldn’t have, characters are straying from their arcs, and plotlines are unraveling, creating dangerous rifts that connect these broken stories to one another. The Nexus System assigns Max the role of "Keeper," sending him into these corrupted narratives to repair the damage. Each time he enters a story, the system assigns him a role—Main Character, Side Character, or Random NPC—forcing him to navigate each world from different perspectives. Max must restore the proper endings, ensuring the protagonist wins and the story regains stability before the rift consumes it entirely. But the villains, unaware of their fictional nature, are thriving in their rewritten worlds, making Max’s mission more dangerous with every step. The breakdown of one story threatens the stability of others, as rifts open pathways between worlds, allowing elements from one narrative to bleed into another. Max must carefully balance his interference, as disrupting the story too much risks deepening the rift and pulling entire worlds into chaos. With each story he repairs, Max grows closer to uncovering the truth about the Nexus, the ancient pen and notebook, and why he was chosen. But as the stakes rise and the lines between reality and fiction blur, Max must decide whether to follow the system’s rules—or rewrite his own ending.
WonderBound · 992 Views

Tales of Valeria: I Live In A World Full of Champions

(Currently looking for an artist to design cover art so please feel free to dm me on X or discord [musuzusu] if you are willing to work) ——— A story revolving around the main character, Nel and his adventures, this is a story about disturbing circumstances, and the influence of strength. ——— Aldrith, a world of wonder, or so you thought. Before the creation of Aldrith itself, in an event labelled the Old Bleed. The progenitor of the cosmos bled and fractured into many fragments, and the blood that leaked out took form as the Ancient. Forming a connection with the Ancient allows a person to awaken sets of illogical mystical abilities, making them an Awakened. The Awakened are the champions of these lands and stand up to evil without worry. Due to forming a connection with the Ancient, they are gifted the ability to use mana. An extension of the Ancient. Another lie. The only way to even be granted the status of Awakened is first you have to sin. The Ancient feeds off blood, chaos, and the grim. It isn’t a force that gives without taking. Lots of Awakened end up corrupting their connection with the Ancient and straying from the path set by the original group of Awakened before they even get to obtain their power. Nowadays blood and malice coat the lands, and as we come to realize that the world is not what we were told to believe, it’s too late. Present day, three nations, all made up of many separate empires and kingdoms, make up most of the world’s influence. The world is brutal, bloody, and sickening. Stuck in a constant state of turmoil and chaos, it isn’t your usual peaches and cream. ——— Born and raised in pious church, Nel is an orphan who has never known his parents or siblings. Everyday he is brutally beaten and taken advantage of growing up as a child, leaving him with a bruise that time will never heal. Nel meets this girl named Elise, who happens to have a similar experience to Nel. They bond over their mutual experiences and make a decision to never leave the other’s side. Years pass and everything seems swell, but one day, Elise tells Nel she must leave the church in search of a place. A place called Valeria. Nel is distraught, confused as to why she’s leaving him. Angry at Elise, Nel runs away to cry in his solitude, waking up the next morning to see that Elise has vanished. Nel matures in the coming years, molding himself into a warrior of notable strength. After making a deal with the emperor of Solim, Nel has essentially became a lap-dog. The emperor assures Nel that if he does what he says, he will lead Nel to Valeria; a deal Nel takes with caution. Marking the start of his long path to glory. ———
musuzusu · 2.3K Views

Raise Love

[Handsome and Mischievous & Sweet and Soft Girl] [Unrequited Love Comes True + Sweet Pampering + Both Pure] Ryder once found a pink love letter in a math book. The handwriting of the young girl was elegant, with shyness and youth between the strokes. The content of the love letter was very short, unsigned, and only one sentence: "Today I saw you, and suddenly I wanted to take you to Laguna Beach to see the sea." ... Aria has done two out-of-the-ordinary things in her life. One was writing an unsigned love letter when she was young. The second was secretly loving Ryder for six years, then gritting her teeth and repeating a year to get into the same university as him. She is not smart, and this is all she can do. People who know Aria say she has a reserved personality, beautiful but like a handful of ice and snow in the winter mountains, gentle yet aloof. Only Ryder knows that aloofness is just her protective color, the girl is timid and vigilant, squatting by the roadside in the misty morning to feed the stray cats of the school. He witnessed Aria's fear and helplessness when she was trapped in a nightmare. He saw her, after drinking, clutching his sleeve, her apricot eyes wet, looking as if she had lost the whole world. The girl's eyelashes trembled as she confessed her feelings to him, her voice soft and helpless, choking on her words: "I, I turned back, but he is just very good..." He is not good. Ryder thought, as if bewitched, it was her. Once fallen, there is no cure. Later, he took her to see the sea of "Kekexili", knelt on one knee for her, and gently kissed her ring finger under the girl's slightly red eyes. At the age of twenty-two, in the morning, holding her hand, the other hand held their marriage certificate. In this book, we will witness the two-way journey of a wealthy, handsome, and mischievous young man and a sweet, soft girl, six years of life, from middle school to high school, and then to university, starting from secret love and running towards the marriage hall.
chaoqun_zhang · 10.6K Views

Sa Maîtresse est Son Ex-Femme

[Avertissement : R18+] « Sa plus grande revanche — Le séduire, briser son mariage, voler sa fortune, et enfin... le larguer. » ***** La vie de Sabrina Williams s'effondre après avoir découvert la tromperie de son mari et l'acquisition sournoise de la fortune de sa famille. Présumée morte après un tragique accident, Sabrina réapparaît cinq ans plus tard avec une nouvelle identité et une soif ardente de vengeance. Son retour déclenche un chaos romantique parmi le cercle intime du PDG, une éblouissante gamme de beaux célibataires luttant pour attirer son attention. Sabrina Williams se retrouve au centre d'un tourbillon romantique avec des prétendants inattendus – son meilleur ami protecteur, un puissant Patron de la Mafia, et son ex-mari possessif. La scène est prête pour un tiraillement intense – un choc entre amour et vengeance avec des émotions à vif. Les joueurs sont tous là, et la partie ne fait que commencer ! ***** Lorsque son scandale avec son ex-mari se répand sur internet, les critiques la maudissent en la qualifiant de Maîtresse Effrontée, Briseuse de Ménage Sans Valeur et Salope Diabolique... cependant, plusieurs puissants célibataires se regroupent pour la défendre. PDG de la Première Compagnie de Mode : « Que les haters aillent en enfer ! PS : pour ces mannequins qui ont antagonisé ma Déesse, je retire le parrainage de notre marque à leur égard. » Président de la Plus Grande Compagnie de Divertissement : « Fake news ! Nous allons entamer une action en justice pour diffamation envers ma Déesse ! Les artistes qui l'ont maudite seront bannis de ma compagnie. » Vice-Président de la Plus Grande Compagnie d'Hôtels et de Resorts : « Taisez-vous, Critiques ! Ne mettez jamais les pieds dans l'un de nos hôtels et resorts ! » Patron de la Mafia Dominateur : « Reculez ! Effacez ces commentaires malveillants, ou sinon, ma bande vous traquera. Je tuerai quiconque ose ridiculiser ma Reine ! » Tout le monde : « ... » Puis un commentaire de confession apparaît soudainement au milieu du chaos. Meilleur ami de FL : « Tout le monde peut te haïr mais je serai toujours là pour toi. Sabby... Je t'aime... Je t'aime depuis nos années d'enfance... Mon premier amour... et mon dernier. » Son ex-mari ne peut plus rester silencieux et déclare publiquement. Ex-mari Possessif : « Ce n'est pas ma maîtresse. C'est ma femme légalement. » Ami de FL, Lanny : « Femme légale mon cul ! Espèce de salaud fou, crève ! »
ellezar_g · 55.2K Views

The Cauldron: The Alpha's Witch

Damian never knew that the woman he would save that night would turn out to be his fated mate. ‎ ‎He was a Werewolf, but she wasn't. ‎ ‎Little did he know that she was even part of the enemy they had been fighting for many years. When the revelation is finally out, Damian would have to make a decision. Whether to fight on the side of his pack or follow his heart. Damian, on his way home, hears a call for help from a distance. He appears at the scene where he finds Zelene being attacked by a man with a knife. The werewolf swiftly deals with the man, removing him from the scene even before Zelene can realize what he did. ‎Damian is intrigued by the strange woman. He helps her with her car and sees her off safely. There’s an instant attraction that’s almost masked by the circumstance of their meeting, but the two-part without knowing each other’s names. ‎Damian drives home. He tries to focus a little on work and his research into the artefact that had taken his attention for decades, but his mind keeps straying to Zelene. ‎Damian receives a call, which breaks him out of his thoughts. It is from his family’s head, Weiss, who just checks in to see how the search for the cauldron is going. He reminds Damien that they are at war, and the only way to ensure victory over the witches is to have that cauldron. Zelene is moving a few boxes into the house with the help of her 12-year-old son, Mikey. She reminiscences as they pack their things in, the environment and the neighbourhood reminding her of summers spent with her eccentric grandmother. Items around the house, from picture frames in the living room to the herb rack in the kitchen, remind Zelene of precious memories, especially of her grandmother’s brewing. Zelene doesn’t believe in witchcraft, but her grandmother had claimed to be a witch. Zelene found her mind straying to the man who had she had met as she struggled with her flat tyre. ‎Zelene drops her son off at school the next day and goes out for coffee with her old friend, Dalia, who she had played with as a child in the summers, and they catch up. Zelene tells her all about her divorce from Mickey's father. While they speak, Damien walks into the coffee shop. Zelene recognizes him and feels a pull between them, and Dalia introduces them to each other. Dalia tells Damien Zelene is a really good fashion designer in need of a job. And he promises to get to know her. ‎ They start getting to know each other when she visits his company for his fitting, though Zelene becomes suspicious of Damian's origins due to his vague answers to her questions. Damian can’t explain his attraction to this woman, but it seems to grow every time he sees her. ‎They cross paths in the street before her house, and Zelene discovers they live just beside each other. His house turns out to be the one just beside hers. Their attraction blossomsand it spins bebegino show. An accidental touch leaves them both wanting more. ‎ ‎Damian is shocked to see Zelene's call one late evening and he picks up almost immediately. She asks if she can reschedule the fitting for his new set of suits till the next week. Damian can tell almost immediately that something is wrong: she sounded like she’d been ying, and he tells her to hold on. He rushes out of his office and guns it to her house. ‎When he gets there, she meets him at the door, rwith y eyes. He doesn't even get a chance to ask her what's wrong because she pulls him to her and they kiss. They end up having sex. ‎Damian knows for certain afat she is his mate, and his feelings for her are deeper, but Damian decides to keep his true nature a secret. Zelene discovers a hidden journal in her grandmother's belongings as she clears up the attic, hinting at an ancient secret. She starts to wonder if her grandmother wais real witch after all. ‎She has a date with Damian later that evening, ecause he wants to 'do things the right way'. Zelene starts to get suspicious during the date because she notices that
Sapa_Mustgo · 782 Views
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