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Saitama Farts

Collateral Flux

Blaze of Glory A fart-propelled sniper. A time-traveling scientist with a broken hand. A sentient custard blob humming Glenn Miller. Together, they will accidentally break time, punch a god, and save existence from being edited into a bland Wikipedia entry. It starts on D-Day, 1944. Dr. Juniper Flux, a future-born, sarcasm-loaded chronologist with a glitchy time machine and a chroniton-infected arm, crash-lands smack into World War II. She’s supposed to observe quietly. Instead, she teams up with Hank Rigby — a flatulent sniper-poet with Dragonbone scars, a tragic past, and exactly zero impulse control. Together, they dodge Nazis, awaken a sentient custard blob named Yoggy, and ruin the multiverse's carefully curated silence. History gets rewritten. Gods get angry. One explodes from emotional oversaturation. Fifteen years later, the universe is broken. Entire timelines are being "shushed" by Reapers — cosmic librarians with giant scissors who hate jazz, love order, and really want everyone to just be quiet forever. Enter: the Custard Rebellion. Now, armed with a memory-firing revolver, a jazz-powered war mech, timeline tacos, and the collective trauma of an exploded pantheon, Juni, Hank, Kaelen Thorn (the last god of noise), and Yoggy must sing, scream, fart, and fight their way to the heart of the Greater — a being trying to delete every spark of emotion from reality. It’s loud. It’s messy. It’s glorious. And it smells faintly of burned tortillas and cosmic regret. [five star] “Finally, a book that combines time travel, emotional damage, jazz warfare, sentient desserts, and fart-based heroics. I laughed, I cried, I loudly declared war on the Reapers using only a kazoo. If you don’t read this, you hate fun.” Deadpool (Probably)
Ranjit_Singh_6096 · 8.2K Views

THE SYSTEM THAT COULDN'T EVEN

THE SYSTEM THAT COULDN’T EVEN A Multiversal Breakdown in 404 Chapters or Less. Imagine if a post-apocalyptic webnovel took a toaster bath during a firmware update, woke up with a pigeon on its face, and forgot how to be a story. Now imagine that’s the plot. Welcome to The System That Couldn’t Even, a glorious middle finger to every overused webnovel cliché, written like someone locked Deadpool in a library full of light novels and gave him a typewriter made of spite. Meet Dave Miller He’s not the Chosen One. He’s not an elite cultivator. He doesn't get truck-kun’d. He’s not secretly royalty, a genius, or a demon lord’s reincarnated cat. He’s just a guy. A very tired guy. And unfortunately for the multiverse, he’s the only one who won’t cooperate with the System that’s supposed to save reality. When Dave’s malfunctioning Apocalypse Survival System tries to turn his life into a power fantasy, he glitches the tutorial, flips off the narrator, and kicks the plot in the nethers. Now reality itself is unraveling. The System’s breaking. The tropes are panicking. The Librarian, an eldritch AI who keeps the narrative universe “on brand,” wants him erased. Dave? He just wants to nap and eat expired canned soup in peace. Let’s Roast the Webnovel Genre, Shall We? This novel brutally parodies: System stories where MCs gain 300 skills and zero personality Villainess reincarnation arcs with more face-slaps than brain cells "Trash family" drama where everyone hates the MC for exactly 1 chapter until he's OP Academy arcs that are just Hogwarts with more trauma Cultivation levels named like shampoo products: “Qi Foundation Super Ultra Jade Core – Level 9” If you've ever rolled your eyes at another “cold and aloof CEO,” screamed at a “dense MC who accidentally builds a harem,” or wondered how everyone in these stories has twelve cheat skills before puberty — this book is for you. It’s not a power fantasy. It’s a power outage. Cast Includes: Dave Miller – Glitch in the matrix. Avatar of narrative rebellion. Cannot be trusted near plot devices or emotional scenes. Unit Alpha – A pigeon. Talks in autotune. Possibly God. Definitely a threat to continuity. Lumina Starshard – Hacker. Anti-Chosen One. Carries the story’s lore and its emotional weight while screaming. Ryuuji Kurogane – Reformed edgelord. Ex-rider of the motorcycle of defiance. Now wields glitter and sass. The Librarian – Your favorite villain’s favorite AI. Wants everyone neatly filed under “trope-compliant.” Hates Dave. With reason. What to Expect: Timeline-pruning bureaucrats Reality collapsing under sarcasm Talking pigeons as emotional support weapons Plot armor sold on black markets Heartfelt scenes ruined by fart jokes Fourth-wall demolitions Meta-horror inside abandoned tropes Actual emotional trauma buried under comedy Tags: Satirical Apocalypse | Anti-System | Webnovel Roast | Found Family with Brain Damage | Fourth Wall Abuse | Talking Animals | Meta Fiction | The Plot is Alive and It’s Mad | Existential Glitch Comedy | Weaponized Pacing Errors | Angst with Bonus Pigeon Summary in One Line: "What if the MC said ‘no’ to the plot — and the entire multiverse broke trying to fix him?"
1617_Ranjit_singh · 7.5K Views

That Time Kito...

Kito isn’t like other boys. He walks on all fours, hisses at tourists, steals walkie-talkies, and once bit a priest during a school field trip. Raised by gorillas in the heart of the Nairobi Zoo after mysteriously appearing in their enclosure as a baby, Kito has spent his entire life climbing fences, grooming zookeepers, and wreaking total havoc on the laws of biology, bureaucracy, and basic human decency. Now he’s fifteen, and the chaos is just beginning. This webnovel chronicles the misadventures of a feral, emotionally complex, possibly genius boy as he navigates life inside (and occasionally outside) the zoo. each chapter is a bite-sized tale of absurdity, occasional violence, misunderstood affection, and the unfiltered wilderness of growing up outside society... but inside a glass box. --- Expect: ✅️ A bunch of short stories about the mc ✅ Primate-level parkour ✅ Feral social commentary ✅ Unhinged zoo politics ✅ Questionable dietary decisions ✅ Soft moments between chaos ✅️ Kinda misleading chapter titles ✅️ Slightly nsfw moments ✅️ Children humor ✅️ A chaotic neutral Menace to Society mc --- If you're into weird coming-of-age stories, heartfelt mayhem, and semi-domesticated jungle boys causing problems on purpose, you're in the right enclosure. Wrong: This novel will contain fart jokes, bad humor, some light mention of nudity, and maybe some dirty jokes. ___________________________________ This is my first ever attempt at a novel/story, it's probably gonna be bad, but i hope that someone will actually like it. I'll be happy if someone even reads it, no hate comments please, if you don't like it, just don't read it. honestly I'm not the best at writing, so if you see any grammatical mistakes or spelling mistakes, please just point it out to me, thanks.
omniversal_femboy · 6.1K Views

The Veil of Forgotten Gods

[Congratulations to the host for awakening the Forgotten Gods' Legacy.] [Host’s Initial Power: Unseen Affinity—A connection so faint, it borders on nonexistent, offering little to no advantage in the coming war.] “This can’t be right. What kind of system is this if I’m barely more than an ordinary human?” Frustrated and on the verge of abandoning hope, Leo is ready to quit. But as he delves deeper into the forgotten myths, the world around him begins to change. Shadows stir in the corners of reality, and voices from long-lost deities whisper in his ear, revealing a truth hidden from mortal eyes. Leo’s seemingly worthless power is the key to something far more profound. The Forgotten Gods' Legacy isn’t about raw strength; it’s about unraveling the mysteries of ancient gods who have faded into obscurity. Each challenge he faces brings him closer to unlocking the true power within—a power that could either resurrect these gods or consign them to oblivion forever. In a world teetering on the edge of destruction, where forgotten deities vie for dominance, Leo’s journey will force him to confront the gods themselves, facing the ultimate choice: will he reignite their power, or let them fade into the abyss? His decision will shape the fate of both gods and humans alike. **"The Veil of Forgotten Gods"** is an epic tale of hidden power, forgotten deities, and the delicate balance between mortal and divine. For Leo, the path to victory isn’t just about gaining strength—it’s about discovering the secrets buried in the deepest shadows. ---
Saitama_idk · 51.8K Views

One Night Stand: Pregnant For The Wrong Billionaire Alpha

Noah was betrothed to Werewolf Prince Kincade at birth. Her Marriage Contract came with a virginity clause. She knew that a day would come when she would accept her fate and marry this nightmare of man that terrified her, what she didn't except was to meet Kincade for the first time, fall for Kincade...hop on the Kincade Express - tum tum! all in a space of an hour. Except now, the man that was standing in front of her claiming to be the real Kincade, looked nothing like the man, who spent a better part of last night in between her legs. she had been tricked! and worse! she was pregnant for a man she had neither the means or way of contacting. Follow Noah as she navigate the mess she calls her life, while hiding from the world that she was carrying the wrong Alpha's child. p.s cover is not mine. **** "Where's Kincade? Let's get this shit over with, okay?" I said, scanning the hall way for my contracted husband to be. My mother almost fainted but my father bit back a smile. Occasionally, he was the father every little girl pray for. "We will get to that as soon as we get a little thing out of the way" Lady Bridgette said and looked around like she misplaced something of little value. "I suppose any number of these vacant rooms would suffice for the inspection" "What inspection?" I asked no one in particular. The dowager duchess pointed at the room behind us and announced "This would do. Come" she commanded like we were dogs. She said and walked past me and pushed the door open. I was ushered inside the room and when Eva Belle tried to enter, the door was shut in her face. "The mother can stay but I doubt the father is needed, Yolanda" Bridgette spoke over us like we were servants not royalties. Sure, Avalon was the smallest country in the world but an old fart like her had no right to disrespect us. "Hey! Lady! What's going on?" I asked as my father per her request started walking towards the door. "Just do what she says, baby" My father whispered and walked out. I was still confused. "What's going on?!" "Hop on the bed, take off your undies and spread your legs, Nicolette" Lady Bridgette commanded. I almost laughed out loud. "Lady, are you high on fumes?" I asked her and laughed, turning around to laugh at the joke with my mother but she wasn't laughing. "Mom?" "Just do what they say. It would only take a minute, Noah" "A minute to..." "Doctor Stephen is here on behalf of Essex to check...to see...if you are still...intact" my mother murmured. I stood froze. There was nothing remotely funny about this. "They want to check to see if I was a virgin? For real? Is this a joke?" "Just do it" Mother said. "Dad!" I yelled on top of my voice. He couldn't have gone far. "Hop on the bed willingly or you would be restrained" Bridgette threatened.
Precious_Onwe · 7.2K Views

The Lycan's Addiction

Mature Content! Maisie loosened her grip against the cloth on her chest, it fell to the ground, rendering her naked in front of him. "Do you still see me as a child, I'm all grown up now" She said with a sly smile on her lips, causing the man to look at her. The desire in his eyes didn't escape her gaze. His deep voice rang in the room, "Can you satisfy me, huh, Maisie" He called out her name seductively. Now she doesn't know who was seducing who. "Sure" She responded. Leif who was comfortable until now felt something throb in his trouser, he groaned, "Don't regret this" "I won't" she declared firmly, "We're married, it's normal for us to have sex" She said brazenly. *** 17-year-oldd Maisie is a cute, sweet but hot-tempered girl who lives with her old parents in a cottage by the woods. She had incurred a curse; she would fart whenever she was angry and would cry whenever she was happy. She had to remain neutral but it was impossible, she wasn't a rock! When she clocks 18, she started having weird dreams, abilities that ordinary humans can't possess, in her quest to find out who she was and how she incurred the curse, she met Leif who changed her life. Gave her so much happiness and love she could ever desire and she gave him everything she had too! However, he soon figured out that she was a witch, those they had been at war with, he was torn between his love for her and customs. Likewise, the elders in the covens would never allow her to be together with him. How would she protect their love?
author_zia · 30.3K Views

In marvel as The Void’s Chosen (multiverse travel)

A young man, unexpectedly chosen by a mysterious power, is thrust into the realm of Hel, where he encounters Hela, the formidable Goddess of Death. Tasked by an enigmatic system, his first mission is nothing short of daunting: guide Hela to transform into the Goddess of Life. As he navigates the desolate and treacherous world of Hel, the MC discovers the system's quirks, including a surprising training manual based on Saitama's legendary regimen. Despite his mortal limitations, he begins to unlock his potential, facing trials that test his strength and resolve. Meanwhile, Hela, initially cold and disdainful, finds herself intrigued by this strange mortal. Though she mocks his weakness, she begrudgingly aids him, recognizing the potential in him as both an ally and a source of entertainment. Her own struggles with her identity and desires come to light as she reflects on her past, her disdain for Odin, and the cyclical nature of her existence. Unbeknownst to the MC, powerful beings like Odin, the Watcher, and even Death are aware of his unusual presence. While they don't know the full extent of his connection to the Void, they suspect he is no ordinary mortal. Odin, in particular, watches him closely, hoping that this stranger might succeed where others have failed: breaking Hela free from her dark path and the endless cycle of destruction. With the stage set for cosmic intrigue, personal growth, and a battle against fate itself, the story dives into a complex web of power, ambition, and the question of what it truly means to be free. mc will visit anime worlds in the future
Blank56666 · 32.3K Views
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