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Batman Kindness

BUll Sh it: Only time I will remain politically correct fair warning

Ellen, you’ve always said ‘be kind,’ but let’s be honest—kindness isn’t always a choice, especially when life decides to dump on you. Your show gets canceled and suddenly you’re off to England, like kindness is easier with an accent and a cup of tea. But hey, you’ve never been afraid to make bold choices—except maybe with your sexuality. Was it really a choice, Ellen, or were you just finally sick of men’s b*******? Because honestly, while you were throwing a tantrum on set, I could’ve used some r e a l help, not just r e e l help. Next time, save the drama for the cameras and bring the kindness to real life, yeah? I mean, is your name DeGeneres or DeJerk? And let’s talk about your ‘helping’—everybody you helped had to be run through the CIA first! Be honest, Ellen: did you skip helping some people because the CIA said you shouldn’t, or because you couldn’t remember if you were hosting a talk show or running a background check? At this point, it’s easier to get into the Pentagon than to get a hug from Ellen! But hey, hosting a Big Chill like that, you must know what being syndicated really means—because after all the drama, it looks like your kindness is the only thing still in reruns. And I mean for the viewer, not for you. So how can you know something like that—how the business really works—and still throw a tantrum every time stuff doesn’t go your way? Ellen, with all that experience, you should know: if you want a happy ending, you’ve got to be kind all the way to the credits! And you know what? I challenge you to actually take your own advice for once—help somebody in actual need. Like me, this time. Because it’s not money I need—I need someone to actually give a s***. so I'm callin BS on your BS, respect fu LL y ©F course! how to be not a dick 101
DEAnotsquishedd · 22.1K Views

Today's Kind of Fairytale

Clara, a fiercely independent graphic designer and new single mother to adorable baby Leo, is on the brink. With a career-defining project looming and her childcare plans in smithereens, she’s out of options and almost out of caffeine. Across the hall in their vibrant Artisan’s Quarter apartment building lives Ethan, a meticulous, career-driven architect whose perfectly ordered world is as sleek and minimalist as his ambitions are grand. He needs a “stable partner” image—fast—to clinch a make-or-break partnership at Sterling & Finch. A desperate situation calls for a desperate solution: the "Project Co-Habitation & Career Advancement Mutual Assistance Pact." It’s a hilariously formal, strictly platonic agreement where Ethan becomes Leo’s weekday caregiver in exchange for Clara playing the role of his devoted partner at crucial work events. Lines are drawn, rules are made (mostly in a shared, sarcastically annotated Google Doc), and disaster is meticulously planned for. But as Bridgewood City buzzes around them, and baby Leo’s innocent charm works its magic, the carefully constructed walls between Clara and Ethan begin to crumble. Late-night baby duties turn into shared laughter, business arrangements blur into unexpected tenderness, and the undeniable chemistry simmering beneath their witty banter becomes too potent to ignore. Can their unconventional pact survive the intrusion of real, messy emotions? Or will the fine print of their deal be hilariously rewritten by a love that was never part of the plan? "Today's Kind of Fairytale" is a witty, heartwarming contemporary romance about unexpected love, the beautiful chaos of modern parenting, and finding your own version of happily ever after, right where you least expect it.
The_Omniarch · 12.8K Views
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