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Kaido You Couldn T Be Joyboy

THE SYSTEM THAT COULDN'T EVEN

THE SYSTEM THAT COULDN’T EVEN A Multiversal Breakdown in 404 Chapters or Less. Imagine if a post-apocalyptic webnovel took a toaster bath during a firmware update, woke up with a pigeon on its face, and forgot how to be a story. Now imagine that’s the plot. Welcome to The System That Couldn’t Even, a glorious middle finger to every overused webnovel cliché, written like someone locked Deadpool in a library full of light novels and gave him a typewriter made of spite. Meet Dave Miller He’s not the Chosen One. He’s not an elite cultivator. He doesn't get truck-kun’d. He’s not secretly royalty, a genius, or a demon lord’s reincarnated cat. He’s just a guy. A very tired guy. And unfortunately for the multiverse, he’s the only one who won’t cooperate with the System that’s supposed to save reality. When Dave’s malfunctioning Apocalypse Survival System tries to turn his life into a power fantasy, he glitches the tutorial, flips off the narrator, and kicks the plot in the nethers. Now reality itself is unraveling. The System’s breaking. The tropes are panicking. The Librarian, an eldritch AI who keeps the narrative universe “on brand,” wants him erased. Dave? He just wants to nap and eat expired canned soup in peace. Let’s Roast the Webnovel Genre, Shall We? This novel brutally parodies: System stories where MCs gain 300 skills and zero personality Villainess reincarnation arcs with more face-slaps than brain cells "Trash family" drama where everyone hates the MC for exactly 1 chapter until he's OP Academy arcs that are just Hogwarts with more trauma Cultivation levels named like shampoo products: “Qi Foundation Super Ultra Jade Core – Level 9” If you've ever rolled your eyes at another “cold and aloof CEO,” screamed at a “dense MC who accidentally builds a harem,” or wondered how everyone in these stories has twelve cheat skills before puberty — this book is for you. It’s not a power fantasy. It’s a power outage. Cast Includes: Dave Miller – Glitch in the matrix. Avatar of narrative rebellion. Cannot be trusted near plot devices or emotional scenes. Unit Alpha – A pigeon. Talks in autotune. Possibly God. Definitely a threat to continuity. Lumina Starshard – Hacker. Anti-Chosen One. Carries the story’s lore and its emotional weight while screaming. Ryuuji Kurogane – Reformed edgelord. Ex-rider of the motorcycle of defiance. Now wields glitter and sass. The Librarian – Your favorite villain’s favorite AI. Wants everyone neatly filed under “trope-compliant.” Hates Dave. With reason. What to Expect: Timeline-pruning bureaucrats Reality collapsing under sarcasm Talking pigeons as emotional support weapons Plot armor sold on black markets Heartfelt scenes ruined by fart jokes Fourth-wall demolitions Meta-horror inside abandoned tropes Actual emotional trauma buried under comedy Tags: Satirical Apocalypse | Anti-System | Webnovel Roast | Found Family with Brain Damage | Fourth Wall Abuse | Talking Animals | Meta Fiction | The Plot is Alive and It’s Mad | Existential Glitch Comedy | Weaponized Pacing Errors | Angst with Bonus Pigeon Summary in One Line: "What if the MC said ‘no’ to the plot — and the entire multiverse broke trying to fix him?"
1617_Ranjit_singh · 7.8K Views

Bloodbound: Kaido's Awakening

The world was ordinary... until the Gates appeared. They weren’t earthquakes or meteors—no, they were cracks in reality itself. Glowing circles of energy, opening in city skies, deep forests, and beneath the oceans... and from them came the monsters. At first, the armies fell. Then, the nations. Humanity stood powerless. But then—almost as if some unknown force sought to restore balance—certain people began to change. They woke up with strange abilities. Powers no science could explain. The world called them: > “Hunters.” Men and women who braved the Gates, fought monsters, and returned—if they were lucky. But not all Hunters were equal. Their ranks varied wildly—from the feeble Rank E... to Rank S, capable of leveling mountains with a single strike. In this chaos, Guilds emerged. Powerful alliances of Hunters that rivaled governments, controlling entire cities, competing for the treasures hidden deep within the Gates. But that wasn't the end of it. Over the years, rare cases began to surface—Hunters who touched something older than the Gates. Deeper than power. Something unseen... a Pact. And soon, whispers spread among the strongest: > Those who form a “Pact”... are no longer mere Hunters. Very few know what it takes. Fewer still understand the cost. And here... is where our story begins. The story of Kaido Shin, an E-rank Hunter. A boy with nothing—except love for his sister and a heart that refuses to break. One day, he stepped into a Gate... and came out someone else. Someone bound by blood.
Yahya_Kherbek · 9.1K Views
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