Funny Farts In Bed

How would you feel when you died and saw yourself in the future but this future is not one you wished for even your enemy to wake up to. When Captain Aria, a decorated soldier medic, is killed in battle, she is mysteriously transported to a damaged future, where she must navigate through an apocalypse, she must confront her own mortality, and fight to restore hope in a desperate world. In the year 2024, Captain Aria , a highly skilled and fearless soldier medic was part of an elite special forces unit. During this critical mission, she was fatally wounded and left for dead. However, Aria's death is only the beginning as She was thrown through time and space to the year 2178, where a catastrophic apocalypse has transformed the world into a wasteland. Aria awakens in a harsh, unfamiliar landscape that has been scarred by environmental disasters, nuclear devastation, and mutated insects. The once blue skies is now a toxic haze that reeks of ash and smoke. Aria was determined to survive this apocalypse and as she struggles to survive with her marine skills, she discovers some scattered survivors and someone she held dear. *** Released times are every day. I might release from 1_4 chapters a day so expect to read continuously. hehe ******** NOTE: This book is participating in Cupid Quill October so please your vote, gifts and comments is deeply appreciated

Corrupt cop John Kane, in a vampire-infested world, experiences a change of heart and becomes a ruthless vampire hunter. His actions disrupt the corrupt power structure of Pinewood County, attracting the attention of both powerful allies and dangerous enemies. As he delves deeper into the world of martial arts and ancient secrets, Kane must confront his past and choose between power and redemption.

Book 2 of the ‘Edward in Love’ In Love Saga It had been over five years since Ethan Jackson and Demyan Chernyshevsky-Coleman had broken up. Five years of avoiding family gatherings, awkward greetings and longing glances from across the room. For both they had tried to move on. To forget their first true loves and try to make a name from themselves from their family’s glory. For Demyan who constantly had to live up to both his fathers’; Edward and Vasili, success he found it difficult to shake off his past when eyes were constantly on him. To forget the man he had once fallen so deeply in love with that it had consumed him for almost a decade but found it near to impossible. For Ethan who constantly worked hard to prove he belonged into a family whose name was a household brand, he often found himself drowning into the voices of those who believed he belonged nowhere near the successful family. His decisions had ruined his chances with the only boy he had ever loved and even though it was almost a decade later he found it difficult to forget. Now as the ex-couple face each other again, will their love prevail or will new love conquests stop them in their path? *** Please beautiful readers read Book 1 and it’s side story, Edward in Love, to better understand Book 2 of the ‘In Love Saga’. Hope you Enjoy!

In the enchanting realm of Eldoria, where magic intertwines with destiny, Elara has always felt the weight of her family's expectations. As the only daughter of a powerful noble family, she is thrust into an arranged marriage with Lord Kaelan, a charming yet enigmatic noble from the rival kingdom of Drakoria. While the union promises to strengthen political ties, Elara harbours doubts about her future and the man she is destined to marry. As preparations for their betrothal unfold, Elara discovers a prophecy foretelling love and betrayal that looms over their union. Torn between duty and desire, she finds herself drawn to Kaelan's strength and vulnerability. Together, they embark on a journey to uncover the truth behind dark forces threatening their kingdoms, forging a bond that transcends mere obligation. However, not all is as it seems. Lady Isolde, Elara’s cousin and confidante, appears supportive but harbours her ambitions. As she manipulates those around her and stirs dissent among the nobles, Elara must navigate a treacherous web of betrayal that could shatter her world. With each revelation, Elara grapples with her feelings for Kaelan and the growing threat posed by Isolde’s machinations. As tensions rise and secrets unravel, Elara and Kaelan face challenges that test their trust in one another. Together, they must confront not only external enemies but also the shadows of doubt that threaten to tear them apart. In a climactic battle against dark magic and betrayal, Elara must choose between love and loyalty as she fights for her future—and the fate of both kingdoms."Hearts in Chains" is a tale of romance, resilience, and the transformative power of love amidst chaos. Will Elara break free from the chains of expectation to forge her destiny, or will betrayal bind her heart forever? 

[Alternate Title: Born In Apocalypse With True Fusion] [Alternate Title: Endless Evolution In The Apocalypse] ********** The life where Dhruv had it all – a caring family, loyal friends, and a fulfilling job. Suddenly his life took an unexpected turn for the worse, and he lost everything in his life. His family was raped and then murdered, his friends left him, and he found himself in prison for crimes he wouldn’t have even dreamed of committing. He was falsely accused of stealing from his company and then in the heat of the moment killed all his family members. He couldn’t even die in peace and was constantly getting bullied and tortured… But like everything else even his situation evolved as the ‘COSMIC EVOLUTION’ arrived on his solar system. With COSMIC EVOLUTION comes the power to evolve any and everything. Swords and Magic lays in everyone's hands as they try to clear the quest. But in this contest not everyone was equal... In this new era of evolution, Dhruv became the Chosen One. With his immense magical power, he began his journey to conquer everything there is to conquer… Ahhh! And Yes, how can he forget about getting revenge…. ********** The novel is filled with evolution, and fusion while its worlds are filled with monsters, quests dungeons, and whatnot. Whatever you need to satisfy your addiction is all here.. so be sure to enjoy it. If you are still reading then be sure to check out... the first few chapters might appear as rough but I guarantee you it will only get better and better.

“Strip naked and get in the bed." Liam said to the pretty lady. “But I am your best friend's girlfriend." Was her reply, where she stood. “So what are you doing in my hotel room?" Liam raised a brow. “I..I just can't help myself. I can't seem to get you off my head. I love my boyfriend, your best friend Felix but I want to see for myself what everyone is talking about. I want to experience what is making all the ladies seem to go crazy over you," she said shamelessly.... Four years in a row he has been voted as the most handsome man in the world! His father is the richest man in the world! Liam has his name in every girl's lips. They all sing of his praises. He performs like a god in bed and he has a massive third leg like that of a horse! Each night Liam always has a beautiful lady to warm his bed. He doesn't even care to know most of their names; all he is interested in is the treasure in-between their legs. Spoilt, arrogant, naughty and selfish, not even his best friend's girlfriend is spared from his sinful attraction. She too wants a taste of his legendary third leg! . What happens when Amelia, a pretty hotel cleaner, would catch his attention but instead of getting kissed he got slapped! Does she know the implications of what she has done? Can a lowly girl withstand the anger of an arrogant, naughty billionaire? Will their fiction spark an unexpected romance between these two? Find out in this thrilling adventure.

China 2024 ASEAN A girl from China married to the king of Indonesia in the 12th century reborn in 2024 with a mission to make ASEAN flourish with peace and love among ASEAN peoples.

His mother died when she gave birth to him, his father a physically abusive alcoholic. Life is not kind to Darius King. Darius would have dreams of being in a world of magic, but alas, his dreams would always end. He hated life, and life hated him, so he ended both his and his father's. When reincarnating into a peasant-like lifestyle as Liam, in the town of Ucladd, Darius realizes he has entered the world of cultivation! With his ambitious, ruthless, and curious nature combining into one, he paves a bloody path to power. Shifting his gaze from the Earth towards the Sky, nothing will stop him on his path for strength. "I will touch the stars... or die trying." ==================== Note: NO R-18, R**e, Romance or pre-marital handholding. I take no pleasure in writing such things. There's a bunch of killing and gruesome descriptions though. The novel is a bit slow in the first chapters, but after that, it picks up and gets significantly better. Also, the power system is similar to BotDS, but I've asked the author for permission to use it. It's also heavily inspired my writing, but the beginning is where its most prevalent. Discord: due to spam bots joining, the server is invite only. My discord tag is: covidcandy I welcome criticism and feedback with open arms, as long as it's actual advice. Note, if your review has any spoilers without the spoiler tag, I will have to delete it. One last note, if you're going to, please don't buy privilege by the end of the month since it'll reset at the starting of every month. Art is not mine - source: no clue. Please comment if you want me to take it down.

Aradhya Gupta, a brilliant and determined student, has always been focused on her goals—perfect grades, a spot on the debate team, and staying clear of distractions. But Zayn Khan, the school's charming troublemaker, is a constant thorn in her side. His relentless teasing and smug attitude make him the last person she wants to associate with. Yet, despite their constant bickering and rivalry, there’s an undeniable tension between them. When Zayn offers Aradhya help with her studies, she reluctantly agrees, suspecting there's more to his offer than meets the eye. As they spend more time together, Aradhya begins to see a side of Zayn she never expected—one that is more than just the class clown. The more they clash, the more sparks fly, and the lines between hate and love blur in the most unexpected ways. As their relationship evolves from enemies to something deeper, both Aradhya and Zayn find themselves caught in a whirlwind of emotions that neither of them is ready to face. What starts as an accidental connection becomes a journey of self-discovery, vulnerability, and the realization that sometimes the things we resist the most are exactly what we need. In a story full of witty banter, unexpected twists, and a slow-burning romance, Accidentally in Love explores the complexities of rivalry, friendship, and love in the midst of school drama, testing the boundaries of what it means to truly know someone. Will Aradhya and Zayn admit their feelings, or will their pride keep them from embracing the love that’s been right in front of them all along?

The first day of school doesn't go as planned. Nikko is late and he's literally running to school. He's so nervous, and the random guy that laughed at him while rushing through a crossroad, didn't add up to his mood.... *I am not an owner of the cover photo*

EXCERPT: “At first, all I wanted was to satisfy my curiosity by finding out who he is. But the more we keep crossing paths, the more my feelings starts to grow. There is something about him that draws me every time, something I am going to find out.” _Scarlet Winters “You died, Scarlet. You would never have made it alive even if you were taken to the hospital. I had to save you with my blood and now, you are a vampire like me. You showed symptoms only after four years. You are turning.” _Damien Grey * You would probably want to ask these questions; Why? Who is Scarlet? What is she like? What is her relationship with Damien? Why did I come across this book? Will it be a good read?... Why not try the first ten chapters and see if you would love to continue reading?

In a world where humanity keeps declining, just like today's reality, we see how our protagonist Kiyoshi's life unfolds piece by piece.

Three years ago, Su Luo was betrayed, his cultivation stripped away, leaving him a powerless live-in son-in-law, scorned and humiliated. But now, he has returned as a sovereign, unrivaled across the heavens and earth. With world-defying medical mastery in one hand and unparalleled martial prowess in the other, he proclaims: This time, I will make the world tremble at my name and quake at the sound of my voice.

When a peasant who was terrified of death, gets a chance at eternal life. What will this man do when he isn't so afraid anymore. Discover the fantastical world of Mardoria and a normal man who obtains eternity.

When ambition meets supernatural power, in a world of ancient magic, young Napoleon Bonaparte must fight against his rivals and his own demons if he is to achieve his glorious goal. By the time he finally rises, will greatness be worth the sacrifice? Submerge yourself in "Iron Crown: The Legend of Bonaparte"-the compelling story of strategy, betrayal, and relentless drive toward one's destiny!

Reaper Academy: Class of Chaos follows the journey of Takahashi Kyo, a rebellious and lazy teenager who dies in a freak accident only to be thrust into the chaotic afterlife. Instead of passing on, Kyo is resurrected and enrolled in Reaper Academy, a supernatural school where students train to become reapers tasked with guiding souls and battling rogue spirits. magical incidents. Kyo’s reckless , his clumsy but good-hearted best friend, Kyo navigates the chaos of reaper training, dangerous trials, and the mystery surrounding the Death Shadows. As Kyo grows stronger, he uncovers secrets about the Academy and his own mysterious connection to these ancient entities. Blending fast-paced action, comedy, and supernatural adventure,

When an introverted young man stumbles upon a sprawling, abandoned manor deep in the forest, he thinks he's found his perfect escape from the hustle and bustle of life. Little does he know that the only thing haunting his new home is a mischievous ghost who is all too eager to make her presence known—especially at night. As he tries to navigate his unexpected living situation, he discovers that his spectral roommate isn’t just a nuisance; she’s a charming, ethereal troublemaker with a penchant for crawling into his bed and whispering cheeky comments about his trespassing. With every night that passes, he finds himself torn between wanting to reclaim his personal space and the undeniable connection that sparks between them. Together, they embark on a hilarious journey filled with spooky shenanigans, laughter, and unexpected revelations about life, love, and what it means to be truly alive (or dead!). Will he be able to handle his ghostly roommate's antics, or will he find himself falling for the girl who exists only in the shadows? Join them as they navigate the chaos of cohabiting in a manor filled with secrets, laughter, and the kind of love that transcends even the boundaries of the afterlife!

In 31 days, I will have aged another year. In 30 days, I will be killed. In 28 days, I will have fought someone I believed to be my closest ally. In 21 days, I will have lost everyone I held dearest to me. In 14 days, I will be betrayed. In 7 days, I will cause a war. Tonight, I will have gone mad. 

The Ye family is one of the top families in Yanjing and across the country. Yet, Ye Chen is despised by everyone as a live-in son-in-law. No one knows his true identity. In the end, those who look down on him will kneel before him, trembling with fear, and respectfully call him "Master"!

[Book One] [WARNING!!!] R-18 Smut Scenes will come in so, parental guidance is advised. *.*.*.*.*.* Barely a month of being a classroom teacher, Selena Scott's life will change. When she encounters Bella Reese Lancaster, a four year old who would do anything to have her as her mother, and Timothy Reese Lancaster, a father with a daughter complex, one who would ruin the world so his daughter can be happy, she is taken on a roller coaster ride. One she will love for the rest of her life. But, when the tides start to change and the seas get stormy, would she be able to hold onto that which binds them together? Even if she lets go, she wouldn't be losing anything. Or would she? *.*.*.*.*.* "You're crazy," Selena mumbled, shaking her head. "Yea," Timothy didn't disagree. "For you," "You know," He continued, trailing kisses from her face down to her neck. "Getting you pregnant wouldn't be bad. After all-" Timothy shrugged and nibbled on her nape for a second before meeting her eyes, -"Bella's old enough to take care of two younger ones." "What!!?"

Com a invasão dos aethyris e o caos dominando a Terra, dois deuses fazem uma aposta decisiva: um humano escolhido receberá um grande poder. Se ele usar essa habilidade para o bem, a humanidade e os aethyris serão salvos; se falhar, a destruição será inevitável. Agora, o futuro de duas raças depende de Ren, um jovem que já vislumbrou o inferno na Terra.

In the year 2150, humanity has spread across the stars, colonizing distant planets and establishing a network of space stations. Among these interstellar pioneers is Captain Aria Valen, a decorated pilot and commander of the starship Elysian. Dedicated to her mission and crew, Aria has little time for romance, having locked away her heart after a past betrayal. On a routine mission to deliver supplies to the remote colony of Zephyr-9, Aria's ship encounters a mysterious distress signal emanating from an uncharted planet. Reluctantly, she diverts course to investigate, discovering a small, crashed vessel and a lone survivor: Dr. Ethan Cross, a brilliant and enigmatic astrophysicist. Ethan, working on a top-secret project, claims to have unlocked secrets about a rare cosmic phenomenon that could revolutionize space travel. Despite his guarded demeanor, Aria is drawn to his intellect and quiet strength. As they work together to repair Ethan's ship and uncover the truth behind his research, their mutual respect blossoms into something deeper. However, their growing connection is tested by external threats. A ruthless space pirate, Captain Lyra Nox, seeks the same knowledge Ethan possesses and will stop at nothing to obtain it. Aria and Ethan must navigate treacherous space battles, decipher hidden codes, and outmaneuver Lyra's relentless pursuit. As danger looms, Aria and Ethan realize that their bond is not just a fleeting romance but a powerful alliance that could alter the fate of humanity. Together, they must make a choice: protect their newfound love or sacrifice it to save countless lives. "WE FELL IN LOVE IN SPACE" is a tale of adventure, trust, and the unbreakable bonds forged among the stars. It's a journey that explores the limits of human courage and the infinite possibilities of love.

After Amalia Jones was betrayed by her boyfriend Chris Henderson and her best friend June Schmidt, she threw away her identity and started anew as a member of the all-female spy and assassin organization, "Die Rache". Three years after her sudden disappearance, she re-emerged under a new identity and answered to the name Irene Gallagher. Irene applied to her former company as the new secretary to her former lover, now the president of his family company. Chris and his recently-wedded wife June had been enjoying three years of peaceful and uneventful life at Amalia's expense. The angel of vengeance was there to unmask the villains and uphold justice for the allegedly deceased Amalia. It was supposed to be an easy job for Irene with her newly-acquired set of skills. Unfortunately, she was not prepared to be involved with Chris' youngest uncle, Damian Henderson. He was not only the CEO of the same family company but also an international police detective that was in charge of catching Die Rache members one by one! Will Irene lure Damian over to the dark side or will Damian make her forget about her revenge and step toward the bright side?

Jess has long for a partner by her side to cement a lifelong relationship. Then Mr. Alejandro Sanchez dropped into her life the embodiment of perfection can she resist or will she be engulfed by him? keep reading to find out